I take showers to the beat of the war drums!

A recent debate over the meaning of this particular A Perfect Circle song has rocked the Halls of Jux, causing the picture to fall down and Kenny to lose his squeaky toy (we call her Alice, and her parents are still looking for her.) The number of varying ideas we’ve had has been quite interesting, and I’m going to reprint osme of the better ones that we never actually said and thus never actually thought of until now, voiding that entire paragraph, now!

It’s about a depressed cowboy.
He faces a crisis, perhaps with his mother, perhaps that he’s gay. One thing’s for sure, he’s been hired to go out and take care of a cow that’s been roaming the wild, killing innocent people. When he finds the cow, he tosses his lasso around it’s neck, ripping it from the Chrysler Cirrus it had been stepping on and strangling it, turning the halo of rope into a noose.

The Archangel Gabriel got really drunk.
So drunk, in fact, that he tripped and fell off his cloud, landed in New Jersey, and forced his halo around his neck, strangling him. Passerby thought he was that hobo that always sold blueberries. They mourned, and buried him by the roadside. Luckily, the REAL hobo was hit by a semi and knocked into a lake, so they never had to deal with the punishing news of their folly.

It’s about that one Twilight Zone episode.
You know, where it’s really dark? And the guy has powder burns on his hand? And they hang him at the end? Wait, maybe it’s about that Ambrose Bierce story…

One thing is for sure folks; I may not be right, but Travis is wrong! And he wears funny pants!

…I’m going to pay for that later. Guy still smells like cabbage though.