Unnamed Blob is "The Closest Resemblance To A Boneless Chicken Breast One". Seriously.

It appears that we have reached a time, yet again, when this great website must reaffirm the titles of its members. I remember the good ole days, which were back in the day, when all of you were suckling up to the teets of a grasshopper. I was “The Jewish One”, Kenny was “The Cute One”, and Travis was “The Sane One”, much to his chagrin. Times they did a change. Travis was unstable, I changed my signature image…and Laurie joined the site! Of course, Kenny was still cute as hell. Round two of Jux nomenclature resulted when two of Kenny’s friends saw the website and gave me my new title. Thus, we became:

Graeme: “The Hot One”
Kenny: “The Cute One”
Travis: “The Other One”
Laurie: “The Female One/The Girl”

Recent events have dicated a change yet again. Kenny has become mind numbingly hot. Samantha has joined our ranks (and will start posting features soon. She didn’t really want to be added to the Members page this early, but I went ahead an did it so she’d have access when she needed it.) And so, without further ado, I proclaim that from this date forward, we shall be:

Graeme: “The Supposedly Hot One”
Kenny: “The Jaw-Droppingly Hot One” AND “The Cute One”
Travis: “The I-Told-You-You-Were-Going-Bald One”
Laurie: “The I-No-Longer-Exist One”
Samantha: “The Other Cute One”

While these titles are in no way binding, I think they’re all obvious. Travis WAS balding, and has now been replaced with a Billy Howerdel look alike to stress this point. As for Kenny, well…I think I’m in love. We hope that you can adjust to these new titles. I know it will be a difficult period, but we’ll all get through it, together. And then I’ll change them again.

Or maybe the other members of Jux are just going to kill me outright for this feature, I don’t know.