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SamiamtheLast October 3, 2004 2:36AM I think I'm still alive... I think... Crossed Reality October 1, 2004 8:42PM He doesn't want China out of the process. That's something stupid Bush was saying. ZenZagg October 1, 2004 8:33PM I watched the same debate in its entirety, and then pored over the transcripts. He wasn't that clear on means of getting to where he said he wanted to go. He was somewhat clear on what he planned to do, but not how. I can tell you that I will build a spacecar in 6 months, I can say how good it is for the spacecar to be built. But if I don't explain how I'm going to do it, what good is it to say I will? I mean, how does he expect to "close the borders", how does he expect to get all these other countries to commit troops when they're spooked enough as it is? What specific strategies does he expect to utilize to do what we're doing better? Why in the world does he want to go back to solely focusing on Afghanistan? Why does he want to cut China out of the peace process with North Korea? How will that work? I mean he has a bit of charisma, but come on, these are tough issues. If I'm going to be sold on it, I need more than "such and such general thinks I'm the man for the job". Crossed Reality October 1, 2004 8:21PM I don't know if Travis was watching the same debate, because I think Kerry was very clear on his Iraq plan. Kitty Vertigo October 1, 2004 6:55PM I hate October. Let's get rid of it! ZenZagg October 1, 2004 5:20PM Yea, it certainly was an interesting debate. I do have to say, however, that Kerry is nowhere near innocent from dodging questions or any of the other "politician's tricks" that either side is throwing at the other. For example, when Jim asked Kerry about "specifics, in terms of a scenario, time lines, et cetera, for ending major U.S. military involvement in Iraq", he still continued to attack Bush's plan without providing anything substantial other than "change the dynamics on the ground", make them stop believing we have long-term aims for them, and "close the borders". He also said something about guarding the nuclear facilities, but I'm not sure there was anything to guard there (I could be wrong, don't counter me on that). And then he would repeat "my plan is better" over and over. His "plan" states only outcomes (which are admirable outcomes, don't get me wrong) but not a viable way to get there. Nothing specific. Having done professional Lincoln-Douglas debate, I was impressed with Kerry's composure, and somewhat disappointed at Bush's performance. He let some inflammatory remarks get to him instead of shaking it off like Kerry did, and missed several opportunities to cream Kerry in some of the rebuttals. Live and learn, I hope. Anyway, I think I'll do a full Juxtapositions feature on my analysis of the debate transcript either tonight or tomorrow night, because for some strange reason lately I have grown an interest in politics. ;). Crossed Reality October 1, 2004 1:12AM Overall results of the debate, after some reflection? Kerry ++ Seriously, what was with that pause where Bush just froze, staring at the camera like a deer in the headlights? It's like he briefly forgot to talk. Only it wasn't so brief. And let us not forget the day when "mexed missages" was added to the Bushish catalog. As a former Bush supporter, it was great to hear Kerry mention almost all of the things that caused me to leave his camp (no Patriot act or gay marriage ban, but we'll get to that, I imagine.) Crossed Reality September 30, 2004 11:25PM This week of school has baked me, and that's why I've been quiet. Now I must watch a smart man debate a man who can't answer questions. But, because I understand that you love us and are worried, I have posted a new feature by Vivian to tide you over. Oh, and we're down to just visual tweaks on Jux 2.0...so it's going to be unveiled soon. Crossed Reality September 30, 2004 10:48PM Are you watching the debates? Does anyone else wonder what questions George W. Bush was hearing? 'Cause they're obviously not the ones he's supposed to be answering. Crossed Reality September 27, 2004 12:04PM Sometimes it's the little things that take forever to notice. Every classroom in Middle and High school had a door with a little window in it, and the window was reinforced by chicken wire, which is known to stop bullets and hammers with magical efficiency. So, today, I was looking through a window door in KSU when I suddenly realized something...no chicken wire. What do you know. Crossed Reality September 26, 2004 11:44PM Speaking of which, I had a really good feature idea for today, but I have a shitload of school work to do, and I feel like ass (headache...and headache medicine upsets my stomach). Anyway, feature production was appropriately halted. My girlfriend is having unending problems at her apartment complex. I grow angry. Damn Scott for getting the ancient song "6 Underground" stuck in my head. There's a funny story about that...which I can't type fast enough to tell before losing interest, due to feeling "bleh" as hell. Oh, and Jux 2.0 is almost done. Really. There's a super-not-quite-so-secret working version of the site based on it. Just a few tweaks left :D Kitty Vertigo September 26, 2004 4:22PM Oh goodness. I just now realized that kick does not begin with a c. Crossed Reality September 24, 2004 11:00PM Feature posted. ZenZagg September 24, 2004 2:17AM Whew! What a night! Ok, here is a writeup on my blog of our trip to visit HAL 9000. Me, my brother Ryan, Peter, and Ari all went down to Kirk Wooster's place to check it out. It was very interesting and a lot of fun. I might still do a separate Jux feature on this, but this was much easier and I wanted to get it out before I passed out from exhaustion. Maybe if we can get a built-in blog or something *nudge, hint hint* ;) Anyway, click on the images to enlarge them. They're not the best quality, but I didn't have Graeme's Canon to use, and I recently sold my real camera. They get the point across though! Crossed Reality September 23, 2004 10:40PM Oh my glorious not worshipped God, A Perfect Circle's new single is Imagine, and they made it not suck! Hey, don't look at me like that. I'm a huge Beatles fan. But that song, while catchy, is annoying as hell. Not so anymore. Now it rocks! Can A Perfect Circle do no wrong? Crossed Reality September 23, 2004 11:53AM This news post is brought to you by the number 2, and the fact that Kenny says that 2.0 might be finished as early as this weekend. No promises, of course...but the changes are getting closer. Part of why we're searching for a new logo. I like the triangle one below, so expect it to show up in some form, if not exactly as it is there. Crossed Reality September 23, 2004 1:32AM Consideration for the new logo has now fallen onto this young man: Salty, the Jux Entente Snail, was eliminated in the prelims. Poor Salty. Crossed Reality September 22, 2004 9:38PM Possible replacement for our current logo/guest signature image. Inane, but cool and better looking, alternative. Crossed Reality September 22, 2004 11:57AM That Cyborg pony has nothing on my Cyber pony. Just look at its wimply legs, and lack of chomping jaws. ZenZagg September 22, 2004 9:54AM ...A REAL Cyborg Pony ZenZagg September 21, 2004 2:26PM The HAL9000 is being auctioned off. But that's not all--it's being auctioned off from Woodstock, which is like 5 minutes away from me. I called the seller and asked if I could check it out before it sells and goes far far away. He said "come on down!", so that's what I'm going to do, either tomorrow evening or Thursday. Graeme, Vivian, Sarah, Ryan, Peter, anyone in close proximity to me has been invited to come with me. He will show us HAL9000 up close and personal, as well as show us the documentation/video(s?) that accompany it. He seems like a cool guy--he lives in an airport hanger and flies choppers. He says he's selling HAL to get some $$$ for a new helicopter. I'll definitely be sure to post the details when we get back! Crossed Reality September 20, 2004 12:33PM There's a new feature posted. It's actually the second of my Scripting History features. This one is about SilverMail. So far as I can tell, I only have one other of these left in me, so don't worry about another showing up too soon...or too often. Until then, enjoy reading. Crossed Reality September 19, 2004 9:56PM I just posted a Silent Hill feature that took me an amazingly long amount of time to create. Please love it. Crossed Reality September 18, 2004 9:05PM I'm going to try to have a new feature for you tomorrow, since I beat Silent Hill 4 last night. My final verdict? It was awesome. But all SH games are awesome. My rankings now go like this: SH3 > SH4 > SH > SH2 The original would be higher, but it's starting to show its age. I actually think SH4 and the original are more or less the same quality. Silent Hill 3 still owns, devours, conquers, slaughters, and purchases ass with large amounts of cash, though. Kitty Vertigo September 18, 2004 1:05AM She forgot the most important/noticeable feature when dealing with man-bums. The Ass Hair. It is everywhere!! I can't wait until Jux 2.0 is done and we can comment on features again, and most importantly, I can have a break. Crossed Reality September 17, 2004 11:49PM The poo-splotch is the most insulting thing, in my opinion. Just think! Soon, we'll be able to post these as feature commentaries again! Whooo! ZenZagg September 17, 2004 5:24PM :(¯¯¯¯) I...don't know whether to laugh out loud or cry.. :O Crossed Reality September 16, 2004 7:14PM Not to distract from the awesome-ass cyber pony below, but another person has seen fit to make fun of Travis in feature form. It's not me this time! Have fun! Kitty Vertigo September 16, 2004 2:06PM Ask, and ye shall receive. Cyber-Pony. I hope you appreciate that. I gave up good homework time to make it using pictures I stole from the internet. Crossed Reality September 16, 2004 11:41AM Since it doesn't look like SH4's hold on me is going to end anytime today, I hereby promise to post another feature by Miss Mew (I've got three waiting in queue) if I don't post one of the three I'm working on. Which I probably won't. So there you go. I want the systems check voice from the Mech Warrior series in my car. When I crank it, I want to hear it go through a checklist and then go "All systems nominal." That would be awesome! Also, let's hear it once again for Kenny. Less than 12 hours after I made a random suggestion that we should have an RSS feed of the main (news) page for Jux 2.0, he had one more or less up and running, and tied into the new news poster. That's dedication to his non-paying job, folks! Next time, I'm going to ask for a cyber-pony. Crossed Reality September 15, 2004 3:25PM I have several features almost ready, but Silent Hill 4, and to a much greater extent class, work, and sleep, have kept me from doing much this week so far. However, do you remember those wonderful "Petitions of the Week" I did earlier this year? Some of them have some interesting things on them. From the Ban of Heterosexual Marriage petition: 55. (Melanie Mansfield) *dies* I can't believe someone had the guts to do this. WOOHOOO! Listen to the people, Gov. Bush! Whoever you are Melanie, you're awesome ;) Crossed Reality September 14, 2004 11:39AM I just saw the best vanity tag ever while pulling into the North Deck here at Kennesaw. It said, and I quote exactly: "CDN EH" Crossed Reality September 14, 2004 12:46AM So far, it's rocktastic, although not quite on the same uber-rock-a-mitigation-super-tastic-orgasm-good level as 3 was. Silent Hill 3 may be the best. game. ever., though. Crossed Reality September 13, 2004 10:39PM Silent Hill 4 is here. To Konami I say: I loooooooooove you. To the USPS, I say: Fuck you up your stupid hick asses. Crossed Reality September 13, 2004 4:21PM Well, Kid Radd is no more, as of today. At least this was a planned ending, announced well in advance. Still, it's always sad to see a webcomic go...especially when so many turn to shit. Alas. :| Crossed Reality September 12, 2004 9:12PM Well, I bought a CD in physical form. To be fair, it's the first time in a long time I'd done such a thing...but I had to have Skindred's album. The RIAA has earned a profit at my expense for the first time in a year. I feel dirty. Crossed Reality September 12, 2004 3:18PM Miss Mew's other comic has been posted. This one makes sense! Crossed Reality September 11, 2004 11:52PM And now, to make up for being evil and posting such a tasteless comic, I'm posting a link to this thread from the Ars Technica forum, which happened three years ago today. Watch it unfold in people's comments. It's still a horrifying thing to think about, isn't it? Don't think I don't respect the families and the magnitude of what happened. I'm just sick of Dick Cheney and President Bush making this into the biggest political poker chip ever. Must strike back. Crossed Reality September 11, 2004 10:43PM The new Picasso feature is up. The real question should be: can I one-up myself next year? Crossed Reality September 11, 2004 5:00PM I am now copiously angry with EBgames.com and the U.S. postal service. Normally, I would get my games from them the day they came out in the store. I've been waiting for Silent Hill 4 since fucking Tuesday. The earliest it can now get here is Monday. I'm tempted to go down to Wal-Mart, buy the game, and then stop payment on my credit card for EB and tell them to go fuck themselves, GameSpot discount be damned. Ragrgr. This is the longest wait I've had for a Silent Hill game since the first one. Hell, Kenny got it before me, and I introduced him to the series. SOMEONE MUST PAY FOR THIS. I had this weekend all planned out to play it, too. Since I work next weekend, and every night this week, this sucks. Crossed Reality September 11, 2004 9:55AM Once again, we've reached 9-11 here on Jux. Two years ago, we posted a very somber replacement index. Last year, I did this. Tonight? Well...I say nothing ;) Crossed Reality September 10, 2004 11:44PM Vivian sent me two more comics today, which postpones me attacking you with boredom again. I think people are trying to prevent me from posting the next in my mIRC series. Anyway, I'll post her other, more coherent comic later. Right now...I have no idea what the hell this one is about. ...enjoy the feature! Think of it as an independent film! Kitty Vertigo September 10, 2004 3:19AM This ought to be a feature, but its really short. I just want to say that I am a hardcore gamer. Walking ~4 miles to get an RF modulator for a PS2 makes me so. I got dibs on a future feature titled "Legends of the Hardcore Gamer." It's mine. Nobody take it! Crossed Reality September 9, 2004 11:31PM Posted. Crossed Reality September 9, 2004 10:53PM I'm delaying the second boring mIRC feature to work on a super-happy-fun-Kenny's-birthday-feature! SOooN! ZenZagg September 9, 2004 1:58PM HAPPY BIRTHDAY! :D Kitty Vertigo September 9, 2004 2:38AM Guess what! Today is my birthday! Everybody sing! Crossed Reality September 8, 2004 11:03PM The Ten Most Hated Men In Rock. Damn straight. I hate Paul McCartney. Crossed Reality September 8, 2004 12:18PM I just posted the first in a series of features that are not funny, and are probably only going to interest a few of you out there. It's about my mIRC scripting past. Just let me get it out of my system, and we'll be back to the funny ;) The next one may be up later today or early tomorrow. There will probably be about three. Until then...enjoy my feature on ServerCheck! The explanation for why I have to do this is in the feature, as well. Crossed Reality September 7, 2004 11:38AM Thoughts from the morning: 1) Frances really IS a bitch. 2) The Floridians were clogging our highways again. This time, at least, they're heading south. I think they realized that Frances came for THEM, and they're trying to escape again. 3) For the first time in literally two years, I use an umbrella today. To celebrate the occassion, my iPod (on shuffle) randomly picked "Monsters in the Parasol" by Queens of the Stone Age. It was fitting. Cheese. Crossed Reality September 7, 2004 3:13AM Random surprising news of the day: Did you think we'd forgotten about Jux 2.0? Expect the biggest changes to this stie you've seen since May 2002 to appear relatively shortly. Actually, we're mostly keeping the same visual style, so there will just be a ton of little tweaks. Even the mainpage subtext is changing. Brace yourself. ZenZagg September 6, 2004 4:42PM Hahahahahaha. PEPKE FOREVER! Crossed Reality September 6, 2004 1:40AM There's a new feature up, based on an idea Kenny had. Not only that, but you can see for yourself that the "Our Favorites" section is updated for the first time in 23 months. And probably for the last time, too, since we're getting rid of it in Jux 2.0 Crossed Reality September 6, 2004 12:26AM Even though we (by which I mean, I) get in trouble for it all the time, I do tend to mention what I think about people on Jux without regard to the fact that it's being read by an international community, which usually includes the very people I'm talking about. Well, I'm not going to do that today. I don't need the fucking drama. All I'm going to say is that in recent years, I'd been letting myself warm up again, slightly, to someone from my past. But then I read something they wrote today, and I realized something. They're the biggest fucking hypocrite I've ever seen. Worse than even our great president, Mr. Dubya. Sure, they're upset at the moment, but I've never seen someone prove they don't care about anyone but themself in such a definite way. On the other hand, the position of "least favorite person I once had romantic feelings for" just flip flopped yet again. Hurray! And now I'm so annoyed, that I'm FINALLY going to update the "Our Favourites" feature section for the first time since 2002. Sweet fancy moses. Crossed Reality September 5, 2004 9:16PM Last night's feature has been lightly updated with a new (actual) picture of the Emperor of Awesome. ZenZagg September 4, 2004 10:48PM NOoOoooo... the red eyed lip peeling pic rears its ugly head!!! Foiled again! If only I could find the irdu tribesman reverse ponytail picture I have of Graeme and scan it....mmmm fun! :D Crossed Reality September 4, 2004 10:41PM There's a new feature up. I warn you ahead of time: It's going to get me in trouble. Crossed Reality September 4, 2004 6:35PM I swear I just saw a freakin' Meerkat on the side of the road. Nothing else even remotely describes it. It even did that cute little "sit on back legs and sniff the air" move. At this point, I'm really hoping that it's someone's pet that's escape, and that I'm not entirely crazy. Crossed Reality September 3, 2004 5:23PM Watching Thirteen makes me feel somewhere between 45 and 90. I was sitting here, watching them walk into the middle school on the first day, wondering "Was that really a decade ago? My God!" How much longer do I have before I lose touch with popular culture [even though all I do is make fun of it]? When will my music stop being cool? How much longer before my back starts to pop like an air cannon when I sit down? The perils of being 21. Crossed Reality September 2, 2004 12:26PM People have been googling us all the time lately it seems, looking for their own name. To that end, I've decided to mention some people who haven't had their name put in a feature yet, just so that they have something to look for next time they get bored! Hello Hannah Bobo! Hello April Yamarino! Hello Will Hankinson, even though you seem to have your own web site! Congrats on the engagement, too! Hello Buddy Hennenfent! I'm sorry I didn't call you Joe Hennenfent! ...that's all I got :| Kitty Vertigo September 1, 2004 6:56PM DOOM??? Did someone say Doom?? That cyber-demon... he ph34rs me. Crossed Reality September 1, 2004 5:19PM There is a new, completely inane Picasso feature up. Now I must go to the glue-reeking library of DOOM. Crossed Reality August 31, 2004 10:36PM Just in case you were in a cave today, make sure you check out Apple's new tablet PC on a stick. Personally, I like it. It says "function" more than the old iMac. And since it has a G5, I'm actually tempted. Crossed Reality August 30, 2004 11:17PM There is a new Picasso feature posted! You might not get one or two of the jokes...and if you don't, it's because you've never found our super-secret newspost in the Narchive. ;) In other news...BEEEEEEEASSSSSSST WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARS. Crossed Reality August 29, 2004 7:19PM The birthday party is over, all the good people are gone, and I feel vaguely used...well, not really ;) Kitty Vertigo August 29, 2004 4:22PM It has been proven that the intricate patterns of electromagnetic fields surrounding circuit boards caused by the flow of electrons actually create particles which form to create dust! It hasn't really been proven. I lied. It wouldn't surprise me though. Crossed Reality August 27, 2004 4:09PM Doctors grow new jaw in man's back ...I'll be damned! It was a happy birthday. Today and tomorrow are my happy birthday extensions. I'll probably put up a Picasso feature later tonight. Kitty Vertigo August 27, 2004 2:28PM I just got in at PSU! Yay for back to school news posts! The happiest thing is that I get my monitor back so I'm not stuck at 1024x768 anymore! God bless 1600x1200! ENOUGH WITH THE DAMN EXCALAMATION POYINTS!!! In other news, Happy Birthday Graeme, even though I am a day late. In even more other news, look at that over there behind you! *leaves* SamiamtheLast August 26, 2004 6:05PM OK, I hate Japanese. Hello, everyone! I've finally settled in at UGA, and since it's Graeme's birthday, I thought I'd post a little something in his honor. Look for it late tonight along with a poem. P.S. Graeme, I do need your new address. P.P.S. I hate Japanese Crossed Reality August 26, 2004 10:56AM Well, it's my birthday today. I appear to be spending it mostly running errands. I spent five hours last night rebuilding old Sheba in a new case. She fought me every step of the way. Motherboard shorts. Dead sound card (ugh), dead power supply fan (how does a fan seize while it's sitting IN A DAMNED BOX?), dead CMOS battery (...after a year?)...only the sound card and CMOS battery issues still have to be fixed. Until then, I'm 21. Hurray. Crossed Reality August 24, 2004 3:39PM I've tamed the beast. The loudass whining jet engine noise of FitzSheba has been replaced by a kinder, gentler, still-loud-but-not-as-bad whirring. Crossed Reality August 24, 2004 11:47AM I need to stop reading funny things on my laptop before class. I hate having to snicker, but I also hate laughing out loud. Being the only one laughing sucks. Also, I just had a shirt idea. An arrow pointing down, with the text "These are my pants" above it. Crossed Reality August 24, 2004 10:08AM My birthday is Thursday, by the way. I know you all want to get me stuff. Contact me with the price of the gift and I'll give you a mailing address. Crossed Reality August 23, 2004 9:59AM Time for my yearly "What'd they do to the parking this time?" update from the first day at KSU. The first thing I have to address isn't the parking, but the road that leads to the University. Since the start of school last year, they've been doing work on Chastain road. Last year, this led to one "lane shift" in the mile long stretch from the interstate to the school grounds. They're still working on Chastain, but there are now no less than THREE lane shifts, and the one from last year now shifts THE OTHER WAY. It's like they created their very own switchback! As for parking, I give them a D overall and a B for effort. When you first approach, it doesn't look nearly as bad as last year. Where all of our old parking used to be, where the mound of dirt famously was last year, there is now a dorm that's almost finished! And then you see it. Two more parking lots, gone, as well as the ends of everything in G lot. A few new spaces were created in the re-arrangement of G lot, but what replaced the two remaining H lots? A lawn! They replaced parking with grass, at a university famous for people parking ON grass because there's no damn parking! Not only that, but they created a new, prettier sidewalk (...again) in the left half of old C lot, which was the "good" parking lot. This wiped out the motorcycle and car pool spaces. What's a good university to do? Move them over! And give the rest to staff! Oh, and all the handicapped spaces were blocked when we wiped out the other half of C lot last year, so let's paint whatever we're not using for staff, blue! What do you get in the end? The formerly always-packed lot, is now the emptiest lot on campus. Maybe ten cars in it. I ended up parking in the vertical lot. It's still there, luckily, and not exactly further than I parked last year. The only problem is that it's at a 70 degree angle to the rest of the world. You have to be careful how you park there. Last year, I watched a poor Jetta flip right over and fall off the parking lot after they made the mistake of putting their bookbag in the back seat. You learn. Kitty Vertigo August 23, 2004 5:38AM Those are some nice pics of your room Graeme. The brick wall looks beautiful with your entertainment center up against it. And when I see that huge bare desk, the only thing I can think of is 3 or 4 computers sitting on top ready for some LAN gaming. Maybe it will happen someday. Also, it looks like that stair light might produce some really cool shadows down in your room. If Silent Hill and Doom 3 prove anything, shadows are scarey. Crossed Reality August 22, 2004 3:26PM "The Scream" was stolen by armed robbers from its museum. I'm upset, if only because it's one of the few paintings in the world I can honestly recognize by name. Crossed Reality August 21, 2004 10:59PM Just in case you desperately want to see my new room (or, say, you were visiting Georgia before it was finished), I have taken a few shots and uploading them in a nice zip file. The two boxes you see are filled with old "room flair". Likely, I'm just going to put them in my closet. Crossed Reality August 21, 2004 3:54PM The new video feature is up. The two videos combined are smaller than the one from last time, so there's no need to fear it. Whee! Crossed Reality August 21, 2004 2:40AM There's another video feature coming for you later today (say, afternoon). I was going to post it for the 20th, but I had a few too many other things to do, I'm afraid. But, hey. Two video features in a month! Crossed Reality August 20, 2004 7:44PM They changed the ending of secret window. Bah to them, I say. Crossed Reality August 19, 2004 2:56AM I just ordered all the seasons of Beast Wars from Netflix...they should arrive shortly. And you know what I'm thinking? Blackarachnia: Why do you always talk to yourself? Megatron: I simply have a penchant for intelligent conversation. ...I'm thinking I really miss that damn show. The only good Transformers spin-off ;) Crossed Reality August 18, 2004 11:47PM New Picasso feature. Crossed Reality August 17, 2004 4:05AM If you're really bored, I've written up a brief text document that covers all the computers I've owned or built (with the exception of the IBM 286), most of which are of the "Sheba" class...as anyone who's ever heard me talk about my computer knows. Not really a feature, but maybe, possibly interesting if you're bored, you can find it here. Crossed Reality August 16, 2004 11:17PM I'm thiiiiiiis close to posting a feature about the Sheba series of computers. I've written up all of their specs recently, so, it'd be fun... I just don't think anyone would care. Crossed Reality August 15, 2004 4:34PM There's a new feature up, by my girlfriend Vivian. She joins the long list of people that have done comic strips for this site. Crossed Reality August 14, 2004 11:38PM Vivian is complaining that she did nothing but sit on her new computer yesterday. ...I was insulted, and not just for me, but for all of my kind that work on this website and others. Crossed Reality August 14, 2004 10:15PM Okay, I've posted the new feature outlining my grand plan. Here's hoping it works. Crossed Reality August 13, 2004 8:46PM There's a new video feature up. I'm going to take another day or so to think over my new idea and see how I want to do it. I'm pretty sure...but I have to be completely sorta pretty sure first! Of course, even then it's likely that the new idea will fail like a lot of other Jux-Ideas, but that's what this place is for. Random brainstorming. Anyway, new video feature, and pray that your friends in Florida have nice houses, a'cause Charley's being a right bitch. Crossed Reality August 13, 2004 12:58AM I have an awesome idea I'm going to tell you guys about later today! Until then, elevator music! Crossed Reality August 12, 2004 10:30PM The Gender Genie. Amazingly, it correctly assumes I'm male! I've not tested anyone else yet...give it a try. Crossed Reality August 11, 2004 1:56AM ...and there's already another new feature posted. This one has Picasso in it! Crossed Reality August 10, 2004 9:23PM New feature up, j0. Crossed Reality August 9, 2004 7:01PM An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting to think about than sex. -Aldous Huxley It's like he knew me personally, isn't it? Crossed Reality August 9, 2004 6:54PM As I left my house to come to work, the TDS telecom guy was hard at work installing my phone jack and dropping off the DSL modem and filters. ...do you know what this means? No more narrowband! Huzzah! Also, it must occurred to me that there was no public mention of Travis's birthday here on Jux, despite the fact that it was a week ago. Happy Birfendayz Zen. ...now...to go home to medium-band internet (because once you know about those new Verizon fiber lines in Texas and Florida, it's all the suck...) Crossed Reality August 8, 2004 1:58AM I just spent two days resurrecting an AMD K6-2 333mhz for Vivian. I'm building her a media center PC based on my old Athlon XP 1800+ for her birthday in a month, but this is a stopgap. Damn, that thing is fast. I'm not sure what it is though, but I think I built some sort of super K6. I mean, this thing is fast for something of it's day. Of course, I did shove 160mb of RAM in it (...I had it laying around, and what else are you going to do with PC100?). It also is probably the last computer in the world running dual Quantum harddrives. My old P2 333mhz's 6.4 gigabyte Quantum Fireball is the system drive. Then there's the weirdest thing ever, the hard drive that came with that K6, a 5.25" 6 gigabyte Quantum Bigfoot. I'd never even heard of one of those. I just put it in as extra storage, because it's slow (4000rpm!??!) and loud, but hey, it works. Still...Quantum Bigfoot? At least those guys knew how to name their drives, I guess. Crossed Reality August 5, 2004 5:15PM Sawdust is the never-ending enemy. It is the great conqueror. It must be destroyed. Crossed Reality August 5, 2004 1:04AM There's a new feature posted. I was hoping to meet the midnight deadline, but I wasn't expecting it to be over 2000 freakin' words. Oh well. Crossed Reality August 4, 2004 10:15PM Longer phone cord at least means that I can now use my laptop on my Credenza (Huge D Esk Two...also known as PT 110). ...feature tonight? Everyone hopes so. Oh, I saw the Village today. It's good, but not great. Worth seeing for $7.00, skip it if you're in one of those places that charges $10. Crossed Reality August 4, 2004 1:23PM I have a feature idea. Will I get time to create it, around putting in a mailbox, driving to Canton to see a movie, and other things? I hope so. I just wish I could use FitzSheba more...computing is painful without broadband, and nearly impossible without the internet at all. Kitty Vertigo August 3, 2004 2:16AM Found an interseting article that "sparked" (damn I am funny) some memories. News Looks like our military wants to use some WAFFULPOWER!!! Crossed Reality August 2, 2004 7:48PM There's a new juxtapositions feature up. I'll try to do another tomorrow. Waiting for broadband to come back is hell. Pure hell. Like sugar. Crossed Reality August 1, 2004 1:22AM I'm so glad I got you addicted to those games :D Wait until you get to 3 for reals. Whooo boy. Spent today finishing moving. Hopefully I can write a feature tomorrow. Kitty Vertigo July 31, 2004 6:20AM A scary thing happened. I was sitting here, playing Silent Hill 2. These games are CREEPY. So I'm playing the game, when suddenly, I head a loud thumping noise coming from the basement. Most of my family is gone on vacation, so what could it be? There is also a movement at the basement door, so I get up to investigate. Now, Silent Hill is a very scarey game, so naturally I am playing it in pitch black, which is kinda scarey. I get downstairs and see my pet cat Kasper walking around. The thumping was coming from DDR. My guess is that Kasper stepped on the mats on purpose to start the music and thus scare my poopless. I suppose thats what I get with a cat named after a ghost. Crossed Reality July 31, 2004 12:41AM I've got more good news and bad news. The good news: My room is 99% finished. My entertainment center, complete with TV and all my game systems, is put together, and all of my furniture is in place. I'm unpacking all my boxes of stuff. My big computer (FitzSheba) will be up by tomorrow. What's not finished? My phone jack doesn't work, so I'm using dialup with a phone cord going down the stairs. That's right, still dialup. I've not checked much of anything in days because I can't stand it. But, I guess I'm going to be reading my webcomics the old way whether I like it or not for a few days...as well as uploading features this way. Why? ...no DSL until the 9th, the phone company decided to tell us today. Fuck them up their stupid asses. Feature production will resume (from MacSheba!) as soon as I get the very last details of this damned move sorted out. That should be tomorrow. Kitty Vertigo July 30, 2004 6:16AM Today I have a dream for you. I dreamed a dream where I was on a trip! The car drove and drove, and I visited buildings and such. It was interfaced similar to Silent Hill and was probably influenced by the introduction of such games into my system. Anyways, eventually I was in a hotel room, or some place where people sleep, and there was a little box! So I open it and there are dragon dice! This is amazing as Graeme and I and now Travis are the only people I know who have dragon dice. Time goes on and I discover I am at some sort of political convention. A democrat of some sort was being interviewed for television, and was speaking of "total annihilation." Not the game, but of destroying every being on the planet that is non-American. I asked if he would use nuclear weapons, which I thought was a bad idea. He said yes they would. Next thing I know I am back in the room with the dragon dice, somehow sharing the room with the democrat. His daughter happened to be staying there also and was the owner of the dragon dice. Then I went to sleep and woke up. It was a weird dream, but I think it was interesting. Crossed Reality July 28, 2004 2:19PM Greetings from MacSheba. Well, the move is going slower than expected. Our phone service just got turned on, but we haven't picked up the DSL modem yet, nor is my phone jack in the basement connected to anything yet (all the other, power outlets and such, are working fine.) So, I found out, to my amazement, that my old free dialup internet service still worked! Just so I could update to you guys! Trying to browse the internet with this thing is too painful, and I don't have much time, so let's just go through what I have to tell you. 1) All of my furniture is in the basement, but my room is not quite finished yet. As such, I'm living in a guest bedroom on the second floor. It's like my own hotel! Yay! 2) The Dish Network came yesterday and installed all the receivers and the dish or whatnot. Unfortunately, he put the DVR in the wrong room, so I spent this morning learning the ins-and-outs of satellite TV installation. I completed the surgery entirely successfully. If we hadn't gotten free installation, I would have called them and asked for our money back. My thoughts on satellite TV? The picture is much better than basic cable, but slightly worse than our old digital cable. This mostly comes out in compression artifacts. However, the channel lineup is better, and our local channels are actually clearer. Their DVR is much better than Adelphia's, in both features (commercial skip forward!), menus (no weird banding!), and size (100 hours of recording time at highest quality!). Oh, and it's free. Or at least, it's the same price as any other reciever. Granted, Adelphia's was only $7.00 a month...but that's more than free, right? 3) And now the really bad news. Well, the bad news that isn't the fact that I won't be updating regularly until my room is finished. You see, they broke my entertainment center moving it in here. I had to go out and buy a new one. Which means I have to put it together. If anyone remembers the utter hell I went through assembling the old one (hint: check the Jux news archive for October 2002), you know that I'm not a happy camper. Luckily, I have a girlfriend to help me this time. We'll see if she speeds the process up. Kitty Vertigo July 28, 2004 4:05AM I found some old news, but I figured it was worth a comment. The way this works is that I give you a link, you click it and read the news article, then you come back and read my comments. Or, if you are lazy, you can read my comments first then go read the article. Either way, this is the old news article on which I have something to say. Basically, I find it ridiculous that that crime can be punishable by prison time. Cell phones, PDA's, Walkmans, and more can be considered "recording devices." Hell, some people would say the human brain is a recording device. What about paper and pencil? This is all assuming that the law doesn't say "video recording device" in which this is a pointless point, but it still should not be punishable by jail time. Thats all I have tonight. Meow. Kitty Vertigo July 27, 2004 5:22AM No way! I can't really think of anything cool or interesting to say. I can't even think of anything interesting on the internet for you to look at. I have no motivation for writing this whatsoever except that Graeme said he'd be gone til wednesday and that makes me sad, but it also might make you sad if you have nothing to read here! So here is something for you to read, although it is rather boring. I'm going to look for a cool link for you to look at. A quick google search of "cool link to look at" reveals this. It seems kinda cool. Anyways, I want Graeme back. Crossed Reality July 25, 2004 7:18PM Until Wednesday at the very earliest, this is FitzSheba...signing off. Crossed Reality July 25, 2004 1:07PM So it's come to this: I have to go to work, but when I come back tonight, it's time to pack up the very last game systems (the PS2 and GCN hung on to the bitter end) as well as...brace yourself... FitzSheba, my lovely computer that I am typing on right now. I'll still have my laptop, and if everything gets packed up and headed off to Jasper early enough I promise I'll try to write a feature tonight. But that's not very likely, because I have to clean out all of the rest of my stuff. I'm sorry. I looooooooove you guys. Tonight, only MacSheba will be on in this house of mine. Even the router must go, so poor MacSheba will be tied to that most pedestrian of things for a laptop...a desk. Crossed Reality July 24, 2004 3:17PM I've got more bad news, July style, for all of you younguns out there. Everything I own that's still at this house is going to be moved Monday. Here's the good news: Almost everything at the new house will be ready by then. Here's the bad news: no phone or internet connection of any sort until Wednesday, when the DSL is hooked up. Honestly, I'm starting to think DSL isn't going to be that bad. Sure, I have less downstream at optimal conditions...but my bandwidth is MINE. Screw you guys, Adelphia, and your throttling ways. I can have my shoutcast again. Besides...fiber to the premise should be here soon. Sorry, chillun. No Juxdates for awhile. But once the move is done, I'll have my very own writing cave! Crossed Reality July 23, 2004 11:57AM http://www.cnn.com/2004/WORLD/meast/07/22/monkey.walking.ap/index.html A monkey walking upright looks rather like a tiny Big Foot to me. Crossed Reality July 22, 2004 10:24PM I'm way to tired to do the big Juxtapositions feature I was planning on. We're in the final stages of moving now (it'll all come to a close, as far as emptying this house goes, on Monday), and it's dragged everything out of me. Even my serious writing is on hold until the move is done. What is it about the month of July that kills Jux updating? Oh well. The school year cometh. Also, I build two ceiling fans for my room last night. Brushed nickel motors and mounts, brushed nickel blade arms, black blades, brushed nickel (I like metal) lighting fixtures...etc. They look quite nice. Actually, they look like something Martha Stewart would put in her "Industrial" section. I'll take pictures after they're in my room. I cut my finger on all the sharp but cool metal, though. I say alas to that :( Bigotry. ZenZagg July 20, 2004 8:29PM My legs...are pain! Crossed Reality July 20, 2004 2:21AM They were only two points ahead, and we had plenty of game left. They just started strong. We would have had them. SamiamtheLast July 19, 2004 9:30PM I would just like to personally say that while team Jux did own "Apathy" AKA "Team Those Damn Bastards" in the first game, the second game's outcome really did go to the opposing team Apathy. Graeme would be silly to say otherwise. BTW, I could still see. Crossed Reality July 19, 2004 9:19PM Just to clarify: Kenny leaves Wednesday, and the feature about the kickball game will probably be posted sometime after that. I don't really have time to write while he's here, and all of my other writing projects have been put on hold as well. Now, guess what? Verizon is offering fiber optic internet connections for $34.95 a month. With speeds up to 30 megabit downstream, and even the starting plan being cheaper than most DSL and offering 5 megabit down/2 megabit up...I'm drooling. Come on Verizon, give us some of that sweet sweet pep. My mom works for you! Crossed Reality July 19, 2004 12:56PM Jux dominated the first game of the night, and the second game was called on a count of darkness before the outcome could be decided. A full feature will be coming your way shortly! Crossed Reality July 17, 2004 2:55PM There's a new feature up previewing the game, written by an impartial third party. Crossed Reality July 17, 2004 11:26AM The long talked about Teeball game takes place tomorrow. It has morphed into a Kickball game for safety's sake, by the way. Not only that, but we will also probably do some battle ball and pin ball. We'll see how it works out. Unfortunately, we didn't get jerseys or anything of that nature. That's an expense we couldn't justify quite yet. It's too bad really, since those things looked awesome. I'll try to take as many pictures as I can, but since I have to play, it's going to be hard to be camera man at the same time. Currently, the teams look like this. People that were orginally slated to be participating, buy aren't, have their names struck out. We still don't know if some people are playing or not, they are marked with question marks! Team Jux Entente Graeme Hefner (Crossed Reality) Kenny Knapke (Kitty Vertigo) Travis Rosenbaum (ZenZagg) Samantha Boylan (Samiamthelast) Laurie Stone (Athena Falconess) Team Those Damn Bastards Scott Hankinson (Old Friend/Samantha's Ex-Boyfriend/Ringer) Vivian Rath (Graeme's Girlfriend) Valerie Wingo (Jux Reader/Ringer) ?Sara Gancarz? (Travis's Girlfriend) ?Lauren Hudson? (Jux Reader/Ringer) Kenny's Girlfriend (Kenny's Girlfriend) Marty Simpson (Samantha's Boyfriend) In the main kickball game itself, I feel that team Jux shall own its opponents. After that, things get a bit trickier...we could also run into problems if we only have seven people, and I have to dig someone up at the last minute. There are a few alternates that weren't in the first drafts for various reasons, maybe we can call on them. Really, I should have asked Scott what Will was up to. Oh well. Crossed Reality July 15, 2004 8:05PM It's hard to update your website when you're moving and have a friend in from across the U.S. at the SAME TIME. It's like trying to use scotch tape and drive while smoking a ham. ZenZagg July 13, 2004 8:37PM So I've started my new job, and it simply rocks and is all around awesome. Getting used to the earlier hours (coming from a night shift job) is a battle that isn't as hard as I thought it would be. When I get fully accustomed to waking up at 5:30am, I'll have a lot more free time in the evenings. Woot! Me, Kenny, and Graeme hung out for a while last night, but I can't stay up all hours of the night anymore ;). We're currently working out schedule conflicts, so stay tuned for the kickball tourney and other festivities! Viva le weekends! Crossed Reality July 13, 2004 6:52PM Kenny's in Georgia, and I'm hungry and tired. Best of all, for the first time since 1999 Internet Explorer's share of the browser world went DOWN this quarter, from 95% to 94%, while Mozilla's went up a percent. Hurray Firefox! What's even funnier than that is Internet Explorer only accounts for about 60-odd percent of traffic to Jux. Clearly, our audience is better than the overall web's at making judgment calls. The process of moving all the stuff you own from one house to another is not all that fun. Just so you know. Kenny, Vivian and I saw Anchorman. It is most excellent; the best comedy I've seen in awhile. In fact, consider it the Picasso movie! Kenny, Vivian and I also got addicted to Puyo Puyo...a game I haven't played in years. Of course, it's hiding itself under the name "Mean Bean Machine", but Puyo Puyo it is. Kenny kicks my ass at it. It's revenge for the fact that I can now own him at DDR. Kitty Vertigo July 12, 2004 6:02PM I forgot how beautiful this place is. I am in Georgia! What a happy time. Crossed Reality July 11, 2004 4:41AM Feature posted. Crossed Reality July 11, 2004 2:36AM Guess who will be in Georgia tomorrow? That's right...Kitty Vertigo! Crossed Reality July 9, 2004 9:04PM A very, very dirty word. After another day of nailing, I'm beat. Enjoy that instead of a feature, while I die a thousand deaths. ZenZagg July 8, 2004 6:10AM I got the itch, and wrote a feature! Enjoy, it took forever to figure out how to do. ;) Crossed Reality July 7, 2004 6:28PM Although I've joked about it before, I found out today while working finishing the basement in our new house that I am definitely not a carpenter. It's not that I did anything wrong, really...it's just that I'm not any good at doing it, so it takes forever. We're actually ahead of schedule, but that has nothing to do with either me or my father. My dad's friend Jim is fully to thank for that. Who knew that two office workers and a writer/librarian could frame up three walls and finish one in less than four hours? Crossed Reality July 6, 2004 10:42PM Heap big storm blow through. Hurt. Crossed Reality July 5, 2004 7:11PM Our Feature posed in a bad magazine! We were upset, but then we posted it anyway. ZenZagg July 5, 2004 12:06AM KHAAARNOLD. Crossed Reality July 4, 2004 4:12AM Apparently, when I said I was going to do that feature back to back, I forgot three things: 1) I had to work nine hours Saturday on no sleep. 2) We start moving stuff this weekend. Remember that I'm moving? Yeah, suddenly I do too! 3) It's the fourth of friggin' July. So, because of my distractedness and ignorance, feature delayed briefly. Signed, Epstein's Mother. Crossed Reality July 2, 2004 3:50PM Alright! A form rejection letter! Alright! Marlo Brando's dead! Crossed Reality July 2, 2004 6:47AM Part Two of the feature is baking in my head for posting in later hours today, but I have something even more important to say. Book #2 is now up to 7,600 words after five days! Hurray! Yesterday was the only day I've wrote less than 1,000 words on it. I've never had a story this long come out this easily. It's actually shocking me. A Man on a Hill's first draft was 75,000 words and took nearly two years to write. The third draft is 78,000 words and was finished almost exactly three years after the first draft was started. If I don't jinx it and do something stupid, Book #2 is on a much faster track. It's also not the sort of story I've written before. A Man on a Hill basically was an extremely long version of the sort of story I'd been writing forever. I still think it's the best thing I've written to completion so far, though, except for the short story Best Wishes, maybe. But it's still the sort of brooding tale I'm good at. Let's cross our fingers for publication! I'm trying not to get my hopes up about Book #2, since this streak could fail at any minute, but I've rarely been this excited. Crossed Reality July 2, 2004 2:48AM I have posted part one of a two part feature. Tune in tomorrow when I reveal all! Crossed Reality July 1, 2004 2:12AM It's already July? Really? Well, I'll be damned. Crossed Reality June 30, 2004 5:42PM First rejection in. "Sounds like a droner." Mmm, I'll tweak the query letter and send out two more. ...yeah, but my next book'll kill 'em. Crossed Reality June 30, 2004 7:17AM After three days, book #2 (I'm keeping even the title secret this time) is already the third longest story I've ever written. Which causes me to go "Dayum." Crossed Reality June 29, 2004 11:11PM Teacher charged with having sex with student. From what I remember from middle school, that woman would be considered a saint. It's certainly not the KID who decided to press charges. Crossed Reality June 28, 2004 9:06AM 1,756 words and an entire first chapter later...I have begun. Crossed Reality June 28, 2004 4:07AM I've had a lot of ideas for my second book over the past year or so, but even the best of them never really seemed to be all that good to me...and thus never reached the boiling point where I just had to write it, like I did A Man on a Hill. Some of them I can barely remember. Others came close and faltered when I realized they were really about nothing (The Eternal City). But lately one of them has reached a fever pitch in my head, bouncing back and forth with careless abandon. I've started on some of the other ideas before, too...a page or two here or there. That's usually when I realized they were horrible. I have high hopes for this one, though, and sometime next week I'm going to set fingers to laptop and see what comes out. I have almost the entire first chapter written in my head already, and if it comes out even somewhat okay...well, let's hope, shall we? Crossed Reality June 28, 2004 1:58AM To quote myself: "I am sex pandas." Kitty Vertigo June 27, 2004 7:57AM Feature for you all. I must say its rather funny, as it involves jokes. I can't take all the credit though, my fellow Juxters Graeme and Travis helped me out. You might have heard of them before. Go read it. Crossed Reality June 25, 2004 11:14PM Two more query letters in the mail. Mr. Agent man, is there a letter for me? Crossed Reality June 24, 2004 11:26PM Feature posted. Crossed Reality June 24, 2004 8:16PM Hopefully, yous guys will get a feature tonight. Hopefully, it'll be that one I planned to do a long time ago. I'm not promising anything though, because I'm not sure what's going to happen when I get home. It might be an abbreviated version of that feature I planned to do on low carb stuff. Who knows? The shadow, that's who. Also hurray Spider-Man. Crossed Reality June 23, 2004 11:32PM All the changes I made in the 3rd draft have now been entered in the computer. All that's left is for me to write query letters and send them off to my agents of choice. First, Imma take a nap. Kenny has made huge strides on Jux 2.0 the past few days. In fact, the new mainpage, news poster, and news archive are working perfectly, as is the database in general. It'll probably take him longer to finish the new feature poster, but, hell...we're on the way. Regular features will return when I stop trying to prepare my novel for agents and start wondering what the hell they're going to think of it. If all goes according to plan...that's tomorrow! *gasp!* ZenZagg June 23, 2004 3:33AM In the tradition of posting cute pictures, here is my heartwrenchingly cute kitten, Sly. Yes, that black spot on his nose is a birthmark. He is guarding my cache of MIDI synth keyboardry and computer parephernalia. Crossed Reality June 22, 2004 5:22PM I think it's hilarious that I can upload the lastest work on my novel to my story backup on Jux faster than I can copy it to a floppy disk. What would they think in the 1980's, I wonder? Crossed Reality June 21, 2004 11:13PM There is a new feature up. By me. Cheer! CHEER MY MINIONS. Also, just to have something else to say, here is a picture of my girlfriend Vivian with Picasso drawn on her head. You must love sharpies. Crossed Reality June 21, 2004 7:20PM I got my super-ultra glasses today. I'm already used to being able to see perfectly again, but not to having these things perched on my face. Good thing I have an appointment to get fitted for contacts next week. I don't remember 20/20 looking this good. I didn't think my eyes had gotten that bad (I can still easily pass a driving test/DMV eye chart, so I thought I was fine), but man, this is great. It's not a whole new world or anything, but still pretty nice. Once I get contacts I'm sure I'll enjoy it even better than I do with these super-ultra-mega-duper-bofuso-glasses. Oh, and Jux 2.0 isn't dead, just so you know. I also feel required to tell you that all of the Jux members are now hanging out in #juxentente on undernet on a constant basis, although we idle a lot. Kenny decided it would be a good idea for us to get back to our IRC roots...he was right. So far, we're loving it. Then again, we've not had an op war yet. Stay tuned. Crossed Reality June 20, 2004 10:20PM Crossed Reality June 20, 2004 12:25AM I only finished two chapters today, because I had to take time out to wash my car, pack up a ton of crap in my room, and visit with my neglected girlfriend. At any rate, two chapters is still well ahead of schedule. I'm looking to actually finish the entire thing tomorrow. Wish me luck! As the charts show, there's almost exactly a fourth of it left to go. Crossed Reality June 19, 2004 12:49AM First, there's a new Kitty Vertigo feature up, and I find it quite funny. He mentioned this in his own newspost hours ago, but since these editing updates are massive, I thought I'd remind you. I edited five chapters today before midnight, and I might turn around and do a few more before bed. This is in spite of the fact that the new complete fourth season of the Simpsons arrived today (I've watched two episodes on my only breaks), as well as Song of Susannah, the new Stephen King novel. They've been sitting over there, tempting me. I pushed through and set a new record for number of pages edited in one day. The charts below should show you just how much progress I've made. Since I have this weekend off, if I can keep up this kind of progress I should be done by Monday, and ready to send shit out to agents. I have to do some packing and hang out with Vivian at some point this weekend too, but, hopefully, that won't get in the way too much. I never thought forcing myself to do this would be so successful :D Kitty Vertigo June 18, 2004 8:14PM Guess what? Shiney new Kitty feature! Go look at it. Its like that food that you really dont like, but you eat it anyways when you forgot to go shopping. Since CR's been busy editing, I figured I wouldn't let you starve. Crossed Reality June 18, 2004 12:02AM Time for tonight's editing progress update! Follow closely children, a'cause you won't be getting another CR feature until this thing is finished, for sure. Unfortunately, thanks to having a busy non-reference night at work, as well as various other things to deal with, I only managed one chapter so far today. Now, I plan on getting right back to work in a few minutes, but that will count for tomorrow's total. It's really not that bad, since I'm still way ahead of schedule, and one a day was what I originally intended. I'm greatly outpacing the second draft editing of last year, although there was a LOT more to fix there. Check out the new charts below. Crossed Reality June 17, 2004 12:45AM Time for today's editing update! I continue to be well ahead of schedule. Two chapters ahead, actually. And I'm probably going to do another one before I go to sleep tonight, althought I'm not sure. I'm starting to get into my own book...which is a good sign, I'm sure. Check out le ole charts below. Kitty Vertigo June 16, 2004 7:19PM My computer has reverted to its primative unstable state. I make it sound as if it has done so on its own, but really I forced it into it. It just means I'm having fun messing with stuff that breaks it. Not hard broken, soft broken. I'm not even sure what I mean by that. Meow. Crossed Reality June 16, 2004 2:16AM Well, I went ahead and finished Chapter 4, amazingly quickly. It didn't need all that much work. I'm saving Chapter 5 for tomorrow, but I figured I might as well go ahead and post some updated charts for you. Looking at these, you can start to see why I decided to show you the difference between pages and chapters. Crossed Reality June 16, 2004 12:52AM Since I'm essentially, and unfortunately, sacrificing Jux at the moment to keep working on my book, I figured I owed you guys at least constant updates on my progress. These charts should make things pretty clear. There doesn't look like much difference at the moment, but there will be later on. Anyway, as soon as I'm done writing this I'm going to go get to work on Chapter 4 and watching Junkyard Wars, so, these charts will be updated tomorrow with my progress. Since I don't have work tomorrow, I should make more headway than my one-chapter-a-day guideline, unless I toast my brain doing it, which is a good possibility. I love you, faithful Jux reader. Please don't leave us while I selfishly persue a career :D Crossed Reality June 15, 2004 8:09PM I just finished editing chapter 3 of my book (which means, dear constant reader, that so far I'm keeping my promise of a chapter a day), and since I have so much time left, I'm seriously considering going ahead and doing chapter 4 today as well. Just like when I did the second draft, the first two chapters are the worst. I'm not sure why...except that I'm always better and ending things than I am at starting them. Which makes me think that chapters 3-19 might be fine with a third draft, but perhaps I should give 1 and 2 another quick looksie before I send them off to the grinder. But since that's exactly the kind of thinking I told myself I was going to stop, I guess I won't be. Crossed Reality June 15, 2004 3:24PM Kenny and I have just finished arguing over C2. I think it's very tasty, almost exactly like real Coke, and it's in my fridge right now ;) Kitty Vertigo June 15, 2004 3:20PM Proof at last! Coca-Cola: The beverage for people who want to kill themselves just to follow a popular fad. That is what I think they should've named it. C2 makes it sound like they're drinking charcoal. Give me Dr Pepper any day... just don't say anything about that crap they pulled last year. Although I bet Red Fusian tastes better than this C2 crap. I'll never know, because I'll never try C2. Crossed Reality June 14, 2004 11:08PM There's a new feature up. I'll let it explain itself. Crossed Reality June 13, 2004 11:37PM Ladies and gentlemen, may I have a word? First, let me say that I am preparing a brand new feature for you tomorrow, and if all goes as planned, it will go up...tomorrow! Now then, I felt the need to let you know that this feature slowdown looks to be semi-permanent. Last night, I started the third edit of my book. I'd been putting this off forever because I was worried about it, but now I've set a schedule for myself. You see, I want it to start to go out to editors by the end of the summer. To that end, my new goal is at least a chapter a day marked up in red pen. I am, as of this writing, 1/19th of the way through. After that, I have to make the changes in the computer, of course. The good news is that it doesn't look like I have to do any massive changes this time like I did for the 2nd draft. Mostly, I'm rewording things and fixing things that don't make sense again. I realize now that I've been waiting so long because I know that once I start editing again, my urge would be to fix it up forever. I'm afraid of sending it to agents. Nothing I've written has ever been rejected before from someone, and I don't want to start now. But it's inevitable. If I don't MAKE myself say "enough is enough", I never will. Nothing is ever pefect, but at some point, every writer has to learn to say it's good enough. I guess I'm figuring this out now. In fact, that's why I haven't submitted any short stories since my first few back in 12th grade. The first submissions I ever made, anywere, were accepted. People were stunned. I have a perfect record. It was, in effect, the worst thing that could possibly happen to me. I paralyzed me. Well, now I have to get over that. Here's to getting (laughed at by) an agent! Here's to publication! Kitty Vertigo June 13, 2004 1:26AM I've decided to do an experiment. Having just re-installed windows, lets see how long I can go without an IM client. IM's suck anyways. I'll be in #JuxEntente on the Undernet if anyone needs me. Crossed Reality June 12, 2004 7:32PM My dad just bought me the U.S.S Missouri to use as a desk, as well as it's Credenza, nothing more than a lonely PT boat. They only cost $50, they're in, and I found a 128mb and a 16mb compact flash card behind one of the drawers (along with other goodies), so they've basically already paid for themselves...but these things are BIG! The Missouri is longer than I am tall and almost as wide as my current desk is long. ZenZagg June 12, 2004 3:04AM The cow says....MooooooOoo. It's all in the inflection though. He says "Travis just accepted a job offer that he interviewed for Thursday + Friday, and now he's got an awesome, salary-type job in Atlanta for a company that was voted one of Atlanta's 5 Best Places To Work. Yes, he is excited." I would have just said "THANK YOU GOD!!" Cows are so wordy sometimes. Crossed Reality June 11, 2004 3:50PM Oh my God! Kenny's been SLEEPING! He's not supposed to do that! Crossed Reality June 10, 2004 9:00PM There's a new feature up. Ug. Crossed Reality June 10, 2004 1:58AM So very tired...feature tomorrow. Crossed Reality June 8, 2004 9:20AM Yep, those are some damned cute babies. My lady Maggie Thatcher is going to be eulogizing Ronald Reagan. I knew it before it was announced, of course, but I'm still extremely pleased. Funeral's Friday...and then the loss of a (real) president will be behind us. Who do you think is going to speak at George W's funeral, anyway? He'd better hope Rush outlives him. Kitty Vertigo June 8, 2004 2:56AM Those are the cutest babies ever. Crossed Reality June 7, 2004 11:47PM Feature posted! Crossed Reality June 7, 2004 4:57PM Listening to the old Godsmack song Stress reminds me of the story Crossed Reality...I still need to find some way to remake that. It also makes me want to kick someone's ass. Ass kicking is fun! It's the only sport where no one important gets hurt! Feature tonight. Maybe two. Crossed Reality June 6, 2004 8:01PM Sorta feature kinda up. Crossed Reality June 5, 2004 6:31PM Ignore the fact that our time stamp is an hour off...Ronald Reagan just died. I am distraught. There is no feature. Crossed Reality June 5, 2004 2:50AM Ug. I just realized how long I've been out of high school. I'm getting old. For example, in just over 9 years, I'll be thirty. 9 years ago, I was just about to enter middle school. Weird. Kitty Vertigo June 4, 2004 10:59PM HARRY POTTER!!!!!!! Crossed Reality June 4, 2004 6:12PM I regret to inform you that there is no feature planned for tonight. Instead of this being my super-ultra-lazy summer, it's become quite a busy summer indeed. Shocking, I know. In addition to that, I'm still running almost empty on ideas. Maybe I'm too preoccupied at the moment, since most of my feature ideas spring forth when I'm really, really bored. Back in the olden days when this happened I would make an idea out of whole cloth...and usually those features sucked. Since I like the higher quality we've obtained since 2002, I'm not going to be doing that method of prevention again. So, I guess, you and I...we'll just have to sit it out. Tomorrow, a feature, there will be. Crossed Reality June 3, 2004 3:43PM You never had a chance to become my urine! Crossed Reality June 2, 2004 2:45PM So I was just listening to Dysfunction today. When I think of what Staind turned in to with Break the Cycle (and became even worse with the shades of grey thing), I cry. If you don't understand what I mean, listen to Just Go, A Flat or Raw and come back to me. Speaking of which, I have no idea why I only bought one Powerman 5000 album, and my Donnas period of last summer just seems damned strange now. Kitty Vertigo June 1, 2004 11:55PM Clie is replaceable. Sony can go to hell. Actually, the eternal flames would probably be a good energy source. Thus explaining the morality of corporations. I've actually lost interest in PDA's. My tastes are evolving away from them and towards ULTRAsubnotebooks. Yeah, this one is made by Sony. Yeah, they aren't selling these in America either. This one isn't perfect though. It lacks a WiFi connection, which could be remedied via PCMCIA, but it'd be nice to have it built in. I'm sure there are many fish on the internet. Fuck you Sony. Crossed Reality June 1, 2004 7:57PM In news sure to make Kenny weep, it appears that Sony is no longer going to be making Clies in America or Europe. Crossed Reality June 1, 2004 7:04PM I just posted a new feature. I'm happy about it. It's another have a dream thing. There's one really exciting thing about moving to me. Since the new place has a lot more land, I can finally get another, bigger dog. Not that Dr. Fat isn't a great dog, and I still love him to death, but...he's not a real dog. After being stuck trying to decide between a Labrador or a Golden retriever for, like, a month...I've decided to get a Golden puppy. It'll be a few more weeks though, after we move. My new room is going to be in the basement (total darkness whenever I want! JOY!), and we have to build it first, so that will take time as well. But, still, in about a month...I get a new PUPPY! YAAY! Kitty Vertigo May 31, 2004 10:37PM I just had the most exhausting weekend. I loved it. Most of my family came to stay with me, because my three little sisters were all playing in volley ball tournaments at Penn State, and I just happen to live here. Also, my three good friends from home came to cheer on the teams, and also stay with me. I don't know if you were keeping track but that is 6 people from my family, 3 friends, plus myself, staying in my tiny 1 room + bathroom + half-kitchen apartment. The best part was watching the girls play though. I've never really had the experience of being a fan until this weekend. Cheering for my little sisters and their teams was amazingly fun. We did such a good job cheering that our opponenets (the other teams parents) were getting PISSED. All in all, I have to say that my family is awesome, from the amazing talent of my little sisters, to the slightly irritating repeated shoutings of my little brothers, and the amazing parentness of my parents. I've never really talked about my family here, but it is massive. Maybe more will be said later. Meow. Crossed Reality May 31, 2004 10:15PM Jux appears to be cyclical. It never "dies", but it does go into these one or two month lulls from time to time, doesn't it? How interesting. Crossed Reality May 30, 2004 5:13PM Well, there was just a car fire at the library where I work. Actually, it was about an hour ago. An old Cadillac's engine bay caught fire. It was actually quite bad, since it started spreading to the plants we have out front. We lost four or five bushes, and one of our pear trees was damaged. Smoke was everywhere, the tires exploded, the car's next to it were damaged...it was a sight to behold. It also took awhile for the fire trucks to get here, so we're lucky it didn't hit the fuel line...the flames were that big. Crossed Reality May 30, 2004 5:09AM Something's coming over me...my baby...she has a WALRUS! From SPACE! Crossed Reality May 28, 2004 10:05PM Der ist ein neuen feature posten! Also, I'm moving! Gar! And I'm getting contacts and super-ultra-mega-glasses, that can do everything, including arithmetic on their own! Crossed Reality May 27, 2004 11:18PM Feature took longer to write than I thought...so it's coming tomorrow! All this house/moving/book editing crap is affecting my performance at Jux, I know. We need more writers...*cough* Kitty Vertigo May 27, 2004 3:38PM "The Master said, 'If a man be without the virtues proper to humanity, what has he to do with the rites of propriety? If a man be without the virtues proper to humanity, what has he to do with music?'" - Confucian Analects The Cat replies 'RIAA.' Crossed Reality May 25, 2004 11:45PM Feature posted! Crossed Reality May 25, 2004 12:46AM Whoops. I totally forgot to post a feature today, so caught up was I in misc crap. You see, it appears I'm moving for sure now, which has thrown lazy summer all out of whack. Hoy. Plus...it's time. Graeme, a literary agent, looks for. Crossed Reality May 22, 2004 1:06PM There's a new feature up. It probably needed illustrations, but, well...I still really like it. Because I'm like that. I like stuff. Deal with it. Crossed Reality May 21, 2004 9:18PM Listening to their first album again, I realize that the members of System of a Down can see the future. How else can they write songs about the Bush adminsitration years before it happens? Uncanny. Let's give them a nobel prize for something! Kitty Vertigo May 21, 2004 7:42PM I was walking home today when I saw a vehicle at a stop sign, signaling for a left turn. I think to myself "Can the driver of that vehicle really be that stupid?" As it turns out, he was. He proceeded with his left hand turn into the wrong direction of a one way street. I didn't hear any explosions, so I'm going to assume that he turned off in time, but still. IQ examination should be part of the driving test. Crossed Reality May 20, 2004 11:17PM There's a short little feature up, eh? Crossed Reality May 20, 2004 3:44AM There's an interesting article online by one of the bestest authors ever, Mr. Kurt Vonnegut. It's about our little Iraq problem. Check it out here; it's definitely worth your time. Crossed Reality May 18, 2004 11:08PM There is a new Picasso feature posted. Hopefully, this means my weird Jux writer's block is gone. I'm not going to jinx it by saying it is, though. We'll just have to wait and see. Crossed Reality May 16, 2004 4:44PM Feature posted. SamiamtheLast May 16, 2004 4:42PM Ok, so I just saw APC last night... I could die happy now. Oh, so happy... Maynard was ****ing awesome. That in mind, my muse has been refound. I shall be posting by tomorrow night. I'm working on a feature as we speak. I just don't know if I'll have time to finish it here at work. BTW, I'm sorry for leaving so abruptly Friday night, Graeme. I was way out of there. I would say Troy was tres mediocre. Crossed Reality May 16, 2004 3:13PM Well, my Jux writer's block continues, and I don't want to write something bad just so I have something to post. So, I tried to post a story called Six by Six. Unfortunately, the feature poster broke while I was doing it. Arg. Anyway, while that's being fixed, you can enjoy said story here and not have to worry about reading that pesky feature when it's posted. Crossed Reality May 16, 2004 1:10AM I cleaned ALL day rather than write a feature. Sue me. :P Kitty Vertigo May 14, 2004 8:03PM Hi everyone. The feature poster broke again, but I fixed it again, but you have a new feature by me, but its kinda stupid, but Graeme said he'd give you another one soon too. Anyways, I shouldn't be complaining because its probably way hotter down south than it is here. What am I talking about? Oh yeah, I forgot. Meow. Crossed Reality May 14, 2004 5:48PM I have short hair again. Like, only down to my ears. That's pretty freaking short for Graeme since high school. It feels quite weird. Since I still have this weird writer's block going on, there will be no feature tonight, although there should be one tomorrow, but I make no promises. Crossed Reality May 12, 2004 10:40PM Feature posted. Crossed Reality May 11, 2004 8:18PM Wow, it's been a week since our last feature. Damn me and my unplanned feature-vacation. The moving is occupying a lot of my mind, as are a few other things...so sorry. Tomorrow, I will have something up, possibly two somethings. Crossed Reality May 11, 2004 1:13PM Part of the reason I've been so quiet lately, despite the newfound free time of summer, is that it looks like I'm going to be moving soon, and this is an entirely new experience for me. I'll probably Juxtaposition that later. Crossed Reality May 9, 2004 9:17PM Well, here comes the Survivor finale. Will Rupert survive? Crossed Reality May 8, 2004 5:07PM My classes don't start again until August 20th or so. Whoo! Sorry for the lack of features lately. I have tons of free time, but I'm running short of ideas for funny things for Jux (I have a surplus of story ideas for serious things). There should be a new Picasso strip soon, and if things still run dry, we'll just have to do serious features for awhile. Kitty Vertigo May 8, 2004 2:54PM I'm done with my classes too, finally. I fared rather well on the grades scale, my lowest grade being a C+ in French, which I never have to speak, read, or think about again. I can't wait till classes start again in 10 days! Meow. Crossed Reality May 7, 2004 2:43AM Rachel got off the plane. Crossed Reality May 5, 2004 4:53PM School's out! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAH! EAT FREE TIME MOTHER FUCKERS@#!@@#$ GRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH Brought to you by the council for thanking God. Kitty Vertigo May 5, 2004 10:52AM I found some awesome software. It lets you do some crazy image manipulation like this. How is it done you ask? We just colour code what we have, then paint it where we want. The software creators call it "Texture by Numbers." Look here. The top right image is the original, the top left is the mapping of the textures, the bottom left is where I want the textures to go, and the bottom right is what the program spits out. Simple, no? Anyways, i found this software here, and they call it "image-analogies." Have fun. Meow Crossed Reality May 4, 2004 8:34PM There is a new feature up, based on an idea by myself and my girlfriend Vivian. Hopefully, it will be excellent to your delicate tastes. Crossed Reality May 2, 2004 5:09PM There's a new feature up, based on the local newspaper's Soap Box section. The free newspaper, not the one that takes money to buy. Crossed Reality May 1, 2004 4:37PM Gas prices have finally broken $1.70 in Canton. While I have no doubts that they'll drop again at least a few cents soon, they'll go back up. This is ridiculous, given what I know about world energy supply at the moment. Why the Government hasn't stopped filling the Strategic Petroleum Reserve is beyond me, too. So, I've invented a new word. From this point on in Jux, and perhaps one day the world, buhfoezaeckho will be used to describe something that is getting progressively stupidier and/or out of touch with reality. This word is quite versitile. For example: Gas prices are totally buhfoezaeckho. IGN has been buhfoezaecking since 1998. (Notice the dropped "ho"! You don't want to use improper grammar.) Can you believe how buhfoezaeckho the Bush administration is? That's us, the Jux Entente, making the English language more totally hat whenever we can. Crossed Reality May 1, 2004 2:21AM So, I finally broke down and bought Civ 3: Conquests. It has eaten my life. Crossed Reality April 28, 2004 11:58AM There's a new feature posted, which finally explains just who this Higgins person is who has been mentioned once or twice in Picasso features. But it's not a Picasso comic...no, it's something much rarer. A Picasso narrative! Crossed Reality April 28, 2004 10:25AM Apple just updated iTunes to 4.5, including new features that I never expected them to even think about, much less suddenly release. Windows Media support. A lossless file format. Free downloads from the Music Store. If they put that lossless format in the Store (and charge the same for it, natch), I really will stop buying CDs. Crossed Reality April 27, 2004 6:37PM There's a new feature up. It's not one of my better ones, but it is there. I'm pretty sure you could never get another sister either, Kenny. And I'm positive that that sister wouldn't come out of the womb a teenager with Gothic tendencies. Maybe this one is adopted. Kitty Vertigo April 27, 2004 3:54PM The only part about that that sounds odd to me is the new sister part. Seriously. I couldn't possibly get a new sister. Well, it's possibly, just not likely in any way. Crossed Reality April 27, 2004 11:43AM I had a dream last night where Travis and I were trapped in Kenny's house, with one of his new sister's who had turned into a Goth/Emo freak who hated her father. The rest of the family abandonded us in the house with nothing but cereal to eat. It was cold; there was ice on the windows. Also, for some reason, we had to climb a ladder to the attic to get to the basement. Crossed Reality April 26, 2004 4:32PM The new Spiderman 2 trailer is mega-ultra-super-sweet. Crossed Reality April 26, 2004 1:25PM Re Kitty Vertigo Somewhere out there is a Roman solider, going, "Hey! Wait! That's my damn kid!" SamiamtheLast April 26, 2004 9:38AM Prom was interesting Saturday. Ummm... yeah, that's been my weekend so far. Shouldn't I have more to say? Maybe I'll make up some funny situations. Kitty Vertigo April 25, 2004 11:49PM A teenage girl became pregnant somehow. Her mother yelled at her and her father called her a slut, so she decided to have an abortion. Poor baby Jesus never had a third chance. Meow. Crossed Reality April 25, 2004 9:04PM I'm sorry for Jux's lack of...anything...lately. You can blame this class, as well as my German obligations, for that little problem. Crossed Reality April 23, 2004 9:33PM Shii Ann, right after what could be the biggest 0wning in Survivor history. I don't like her all that much, but she certainly kicked ass last night... If you don't watch Survivor, you don't know, or care, though. I'm only posting this because I really don't have anything that's more interesting to say today. Hurray for Fridays! ;) Crossed Reality April 22, 2004 7:35PM I have now posted a feature of my very own. It's not as good as Kenny's feature, but I thought you deserved a little extra treat today for being so patient during finals. Try not to gorge yourself. Remember: wisdom in moderation! Crossed Reality April 22, 2004 2:03PM Poets die younger than novelists, other writers. My theory? I think poverty kills the poor bastards, not some tortured soul. Crossed Reality April 22, 2004 1:55PM The product sounds strangely like one I could expect a certain company owned by the Yellow Pants Consortium to come out with... Kitty Vertigo April 22, 2004 12:00PM I will have done a news post advertiseing my new feature by the time you will have read this. Go read my new feature here. There is a cute little kitten image I stole from the internet in it as a bonus, see if you can find it! Meow. Crossed Reality April 22, 2004 10:26AM Kenny's new feature kicks a ton of ass! ...wait, why hasn't he done a news post? Crossed Reality April 21, 2004 10:07AM Worst Songs of All Time Blender magazine dares to say that Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da is one of the 50 worst songs of all time? That it was bad at ALL? Mr. Bush, sir, they're terrorists! Granted, it barely cracked the list at #48, but that's still considered worse than a lot of shitty songs. If you're going to toss a token Beatles song a worst songs list, at least put All You Need Is Love on there. Crossed Reality April 20, 2004 6:37PM Feature. Up. J0. I sat down at this computer to write a quick news post about one of my pet peeves at the library and then a new feature...the second half, finally, of my presidential reviews. However, that news post turned into a Juxtapositions feature, which means that the presidents are going to have to wait a little longer. Crossed Reality April 19, 2004 10:29PM That's a lot better than my series of self help books, which bombed last year. "How To Believe In Mass Delusions: The First Baptist Way." "You Hate President Bush: Learn Why." SamiamtheLast April 19, 2004 9:23PM I must say, Zen, that I am quite impressed with your writing abilities. You oculd very well become the next Dr. Katz. I can just see it now: HOW TO EMPOWER YOURSELF THROUGH INVENTION IN THREE SIMPLE STEPS: A GUIDE TO THE UNCREATIVE Yes, I definitely see it now. Crossed Reality April 19, 2004 7:44PM "I used to say that we needed a statue of Mrs Thatcher so that, come the revolution, we could pull it over," said Banks. "But now I'm chairman of the works of art committee, no one better touch it." That's a quote from Labour MP Tony Banks I found while doing my research paper on Margaret Thatcher. There are quite a few other good ones, but I particularly like that one. Crossed Reality April 19, 2004 1:12PM This is the last week I have any major obligations to school. Unfortunately, that's the good news. The bad news is that I do have major obligations to school this week. It makes me feel like death. ZenZagg April 17, 2004 9:35PM There is a new feature for all you inventors/creative people out there! :D Crossed Reality April 16, 2004 7:09PM The special awards and dubious honors are up. Merry Christmas, and happy second birthday to the Jux Entente! The next feature up will return us to our normal selves, have no fear. Our celebration of our past is over...until next year. Or May, which is the second anniversary of Jux Entente.com, and the name Jux Entente...but we wouldn't do that to you. Crossed Reality April 15, 2004 9:47PM I've been muuuuuuurdered with crap today, so unfortunately the second half of the ball-busting awards feature will have to go up tomorrow. Don't hurt me. Crossed Reality April 15, 2004 9:18AM Exactly! Kitty Vertigo April 15, 2004 8:11AM This one is going to be painful... Mouths? Vaginas? Same thing in the end. Meeeeow. ZenZagg April 15, 2004 3:45AM By the way, Natalie has mouths for eyes, and cloned moles for her smile. :D Crossed Reality April 14, 2004 8:27PM Guess what everyone? That's right, the SECOND ANNUAL JUX ENTENTE AWARDS HAVE BEEN POSTED! This is only day one of the awards, as tomorrow I will post the Special Mentions and Dubious Honors awards. You'll notice, and I mention, that the format has changed slightly this year. It seemed like a good idea at the time, since I thought it would make the feature more concise and less time consuming on my part. Actually, it's longer, and it took me twice as long as last year to do. You live, you learn. ZenZagg April 14, 2004 7:11PM You see Kenny, certain species of Grey Squirrel have laser heat vision. The mischevious fluffy trickster obviously saw your vulnerability and melted the zipper support at the exact moment that your tugging strength was at maximum. The key to avoiding such encounters is to always have a bookbag with leather zipper supports, the smoke would give him away if he tried anything. Kitty Vertigo April 14, 2004 3:48PM So I'm walking and trying to close my backpack at the same time. Suddenly the zipper snaps, causing me to punch myself in the face. Luckily, there wasn't a soul around to witness this except a little gray squirrel. <wish>So I kick it</wish>. Crossed Reality April 14, 2004 12:23AM I just finished a research paper and six quizzes. Praise glory. Crossed Reality April 13, 2004 1:00PM Exactly! Google is not some sort of state institution. If you give up your own privacy, you give it up...period. Personally, I'd much rather have a company serve me ads based on my email than have the government decide what I can and can't see on TV. Because that would be communism. ...wait a second. Anyway, I'm convinced Gmail was introduced solely to sidetrack our fund raising efforts. Damn you Google! Kitty Vertigo April 13, 2004 11:43AM Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah. I'm sure California has more important things to deal with than Gmail. Hey I have a solution to this problem! Why don't we make it so that people have a CHOICE and aren't REQUIRED to use Gmail. Then they won't get even MORE advertisements in their mail. I sure as hell won't use it. I might get an account though... a free gig of net space could be useful. Meow. Crossed Reality April 12, 2004 12:35PM Welcome to Jux's second anniversary week! I'm working on another awards feature for you, but unfortunately Travis hasn't turned in his votes yet. It should still go up the same date as last years though. And there's more than that coming down the pipe this week. For example, today we're revealing something that I had orginally compiled for Jux 2.0, to be revealed (...at some point) this summer, we hope. But, it felt much more at home during this week than bundled with a bunch of other stuff. So it is that if you travel to the land of Information, you will see the brand new Jux Museum. It's chock full of goodness. The rest of the Information area has been worked over a bit too. A few pages are gone. The entire thing has been renamed from "Jux Entente Information" to the much more commonly used "Information Section." The FAQ and photo pages will be updated at some point, I'm sure. So, anyway, I'm pulling my air out over a Churchill biography (that I have to read), a Thatcher biography (that I have to write), a report on semiconductor grade Silicon, a few dozen Health projects, learning German, doing the awards feature (it's become a fiasco this year)...while I'm making myself bald, you should enjoy our Juxly past! There may or may not be a real feature today, but this is a massive product introduction, so if there isn't one, suck it up ;) Crossed Reality April 10, 2004 4:15PM There's a new feature up, all about dogs, and how to clean them. Crossed Reality April 8, 2004 7:39PM There's a new feature up, containing everyone's acknowledged most well-known Messiah. Crossed Reality April 8, 2004 10:27AM I mentioned earlier this week the tenth anniversary of Kurt Cobain's suicide. Well, today is a decade since they found them. In honor, I will grace Jux's main page with some lyrics from the second greatest band of all time. They could have been bigger than the Beatles, damnit! Lithium I'm so happy 'cause today I've found my friends ... They're in my head I'm so ugly, but that's okay, 'cause so are you... We've broken our mirrors Sunday morning is everyday for all I care... And I'm not scared Light my candles in a daze... 'Cause I've found god - yeah, yeah, yeah I'm so lonely but that's okay I shaved my head... And I'm not sad And just maybe I'm to blame for all I've heard... But I'm not sure I'm so excited, I can't wait to meet you there... But I don't care I'm so horny but that's okay... My will is good - yeah, yeah, yeah I like it - I'm not gonna crack I miss you - I'm not gonna crack I love you - I'm not gonna crack I kill you - I'm not gonna crack Kitty Vertigo April 8, 2004 6:27AM I was bored last night, and unable to sleep. So I decided to make a new Jux wallpaper to decorate all those boring desktops! You can find it *here*. At least go look at it you lazy bum! Meow. Crossed Reality April 7, 2004 12:45PM Well, I guess I do have something else to say beyond the new feature. There's a lovely guide online to Installing Linux on a Dead Badger. I'm mad only because we didn't do it first. Crossed Reality April 7, 2004 12:32PM New feature up. I have nothing more to say, I suppose. Crossed Reality April 7, 2004 9:56AM We need to bring the beat back. Crossed Reality April 6, 2004 6:01PM Our representative to the Georgia General Assembly is up for re-election this year, it seems. Part of me really wants to run against him. Another, perhaps saner, voice tells me to at least wait until I'm out of school. I'm going to have to think this over...the most important issue being, could I beat Calvin Hill? And would I really want to? Kitty Vertigo April 6, 2004 12:09AM Indefatigable my meow! You should see me in class(nap-time). Anyways, the feature poster is stupid. Meow! Crossed Reality April 5, 2004 11:42PM The indefatigueable Kitty Vertigo has allowed your new feature, about Heaven's Deregulation, to be posted! Crossed Reality April 5, 2004 6:23PM And let's not forget, Kurt Cobain died a decade ago today. Crossed Reality April 5, 2004 6:13PM I have good news and bad news. The good news is that I just finished a feature. The bad news is that the feature poster appears to have broken itself again. Oh, that feature poster. I'm sure it'll go up by the end of the night. While you wait, there's a Deep Space Nine marathon on. Go watch that! Crossed Reality April 4, 2004 9:24PM Well, I was going to do a feature today, but I suddenly find myself without a single idea. I might do one tomorrow during my lunch break. Crossed Reality April 2, 2004 1:01PM Der ist a neuen Feature posten. Athena Falconess April 2, 2004 12:19PM As Graeme mentioned earlier in the week, they've replaced our old TV with a new one and we're not allowed to have our video games on it, however, they've kept the old TV and we're allowed to play video games on it. They've said they're going to move it to the back of the student center like we've asked, but have yet to do so yet. I've brought this up to tell everyone that the people I play video games with and I have discussed starting a club at school. Basically, it's going to be a video games and anime club although we haven't really decided on the name yet. Oddly enough, I'm one of the people they're thinking about making president. Actually, I'd rather be treasurer. I'm good with money and I don't really like being the one that has to be in charge, but we'll see how that goes. Crossed Reality April 1, 2004 11:04PM April Fool's day is pretty much over. I hope you all enjoyed our day being the CAP Alert Ministries. ;) Crossed Reality March 30, 2004 7:27PM Not to take emphasis away from Samantha, but there's another new feature online, this one detailing a new fund raising idea I had that I hope you all will participate in. At least check it out on the Features page for us, all right? ;) That feature will soon have a link in the Store, too. Even if you don't want to sign up, at least drop me a line telling me what you think about it, eh? SamiamtheLast March 30, 2004 6:20PM Line #7 of futile should be corrected to "For it twists, bends however thou will go" SamiamtheLast March 30, 2004 6:18PM Feature Up: Just a bit of poetry. Crossed Reality March 29, 2004 11:54PM Born Too Slow by The Crystal Method won't stop repeating in my head. This would bother me, if it wasn't such a good song. As it is, you need only worry that it's slowly driving me completely crazy. Crossed Reality March 29, 2004 12:21PM Well, apparently my school decided yet more flagrant displays of cash were needed to celebrate our Championship. I walked into my Health class today, and found entirely new table-desk setups. That's pretty interesting, but nothing mind blowing. Then, on my trek through the student center, I see that our "old" big-screen rear-projection set has been replaced with a new, bigger, widescreen flat panel TV. What the hell? I've only been gone a weekend, remember. SamiamtheLast March 29, 2004 9:11AM Ok, the Mars article has been resurrected. I'll be posting it as well as another within the next couple of days. Yipee! I've been very quiet lately. After this evil report is finished, I'll have time probably. Crossed Reality March 29, 2004 9:04AM Today's Penny Arcade is super-duper happy. It's already one of my favorites. Also, my girlfriend is obsessed with tables. Tables. My interest in videogames has been at sort of a low ebb lately. The only thing that's come out that I really, really wanted is Final Fantasy: Crystal Chronicles, and because of a lack of other people to carry the bucket, I can't really play it. More of my friends need to get GameBoys. Crossed Reality March 27, 2004 3:58PM There's a new Picasso feature up, a sequel to yesterday's. Crossed Reality March 27, 2004 3:14PM A few seconds ago, Kennesaw State University won the Division II NCAA title. Hurray! If only I didn't hate basketball. Crossed Reality March 27, 2004 1:50PM Scott just revealed to me the existence of How Was She. As a joke, the site is hilarious. In practice, it is very, very scary. Crossed Reality March 26, 2004 11:26PM To whichever Jux reader (writer?) signed me up for the HITworship mailing list...cute, real cute. I'm sending all of you hardcore pornography. Crossed Reality March 26, 2004 10:15PM There's a new feature up, starring none other than Cary Grant playing Picasso. Crossed Reality March 26, 2004 3:34PM Finally got my car back. I am now extremely happy again. Seriously, my mood improved nigh instantly today as soon as I started driving it. Celes Zwei fits me like a glove, everything from her steering ratio to her stereo system. Beyond the driving nirvana, it's also nice to have people look at my car as I pass in a GOOD way again, not in a "Why is that guy driving an Oldsmobile?" way. Celes is quite sexy. I also had to drive past my old high school at rush hour today, a sight I haven't seen in awhile. Brought back memories. I really miss hanging out with a group of guys sometimes, just shooting the shit. The closest I've come to that in a long time was in PA with Travis and Kenny, and it was great. Yet, not quite the same. I've been talking to Scott more lately, too...maybe that has something to do with this weird nostalgia. So much of life at Cherokee was total shit, it's good to remember that there were a few cool things. There will be a feature later tonight, I hope, if I don't get too caught up in my CSI season set. Crossed Reality March 25, 2004 9:18PM My free copy of Final Fantasy XI, complete with hard drive, has arrived. Lord only knows when I'll get a chance to play it. If it doesn't include a free month, I might not ever. At the very least I'll need to pick up a USB keyboard... Crossed Reality March 25, 2004 10:19AM Speaking of the FCC, there's a petition online to stop them, one that's already doing quite well. Much better than any of ours. But you should still go sign at StopFCC. Crossed Reality March 25, 2004 10:11AM It's things like this that are causing my opinion of Bush as a human being to go back up, even as my opinion of him as a leader (let's face it, he's a GREAT politician, but they're not the same) continue to go down. Mr. President, I couldn't give a fuck at this point as to why we went to war in Iraq. If you're a liar, so be it. I can deal with a lot of lying from war leaders, but, it's your heaping feces upon the bill of rights that's gotten me in Kerry's camp. Also, I feel the FCC has outlived its usefulness. What say we give them control of Amtrak, or something instead? That'd be great. I'd vote for you then! Kitty Vertigo March 24, 2004 6:08PM Computer piss me off. Lets pretend I am a computer and you are a program. If you see something interesting and say "Hey! Look over at that!" you had damn better well make sure it doesn't move before I look or I will kill you. I'm not making it up. That is what computers do. They are very violent creatures, unlike kitties which are only violent when they are hungry or threatened or pissed off at their computers. I'm hungry miaou. Crossed Reality March 24, 2004 5:35PM First, my car was going to be ready Tuesday. Then, it was going to be ready today. Now, they're telling me they're running behind and I can pick it up tomorrow. I sure as hell BETTER get my Celes back tomorrow. If they were going to push it back to Friday, they should have done it on Tuesday, rather than doing it one day at a time, which just drives me crazy. Crossed Reality March 24, 2004 12:22PM Well, there's a new feature up for you. Enjoy! And I'm sorry I got your boyfriend to turn crazy, Valerie. Crossed Reality March 23, 2004 11:29PM Two things of note: 1: Oregon stole my idea 2: SCO Sues God Crossed Reality March 23, 2004 1:20PM I'm watching the first season of CSI on DVD, and it's amazing how much younger everyone looks. It's not even been four years. I think part of it is the makeup and lighting being focused on MAKING them look older and darker now. These early episodes are about three times as well lit as the modern ones. It's like at some point they decided to rip out everything but the desklamps. Either that, or these people are so in character that the stress has aged them 15 years in a third of that. Crossed Reality March 22, 2004 7:22PM Two new features are now up. Persue them (through jungles, I'll bet) at your leisure. Crossed Reality March 22, 2004 6:24PM Well, guess who's school just got a DDR machine today? Better yet, guess which Jux Entente friend and contributor is featured in the Manhattan Arts Herstory Exhibit? That's right, little Gnome, Lauren. I'm also working on a feature at the moment that will be an update to the ball game we have planned for this summer. Crossed Reality March 20, 2004 1:43PM Man stopped at airport with seal's head in luggage. I have nothing else to say. I'm just going to stare in awe. Crossed Reality March 20, 2004 11:18AM There's a new feature up, based on the tale of those idiots parents you may have heard about in the news. Well, hell, it's the same basic thing that's been happening for centuries with books, so everyone can play along! Crossed Reality March 20, 2004 9:41AM Well, I was supposed to get my car back yesterday, but the date is now officially Tuesday. I can't wait to get my lovely Celes Zwei back. They say she's as good as new, and I believe them. In other news, FitzSheba was upgraded last night to include a new, dual format, 8x DVD burner. Oh, the fun we will have. Crossed Reality March 18, 2004 1:04PM I have resolved the image problem, and the Picasso feature is finally online.! PRAISE BE UNTO HIM THAT ROLLS THE TIRES! Crossed Reality March 18, 2004 9:07AM The problem with writing a feature is that the Picasso image still insists it's not there, despite being uploaded by FTP three times, verified by FTP and the ENSIM file manager, renamed on the server three times (successfully!), until I originally just resorted back to the original name... All of these problems are probably related to our host recently moving us to a new dual Xeon server. Support has been contacted already about the image problem, and they tend to be pretty quick on their feet, so hopefully we'll have everything under control soon. Sorry for the delays. I'm sure there are plenty of features in the archive you've never read, or haven't read for a long time. Despite these problems, I'm still very happy with our host, FuitadNET. At least they actually warned us there might be some slight downtime. Contrast this to our previous host, who took out Jux for almost a week because they were apparently too lazy to send even one email saying "Oh, by the way, we're changing your DNS." Kitty Vertigo March 18, 2004 1:31AM Hello everyone! I havn't been heard from in like a month, but that is ok. I fixed the feature poster again... same problem as last time. Until someone writes a feature there will be a temporary test message. Anyways, tonight my film friends came to film a scene in my apartment. It was quite an interesting experience. I got to be the SlateMAN... you know... the guy who clicks that thing. For anyone who doesn't know, that clicky thing is used to synchronize the audio recording with the video recording. I never knew that until a few weeks ago, thanks to my film friends. That's all I've got. Meow. Crossed Reality March 17, 2004 11:56PM Well, not only is the feature poster apparently broken again (sigh), it appears that there's something wrong with the server, too. They just upgraded the server today, so I'm a little unsurprised, but why would it not serve the image? It's there, just like every other image. Every other image works. Yet, this link does not work. I assure you, the file is there. Something to work out, I guess. Sorry for the delay. Crossed Reality March 17, 2004 11:30PM Sorry about the missing Picasso feature. I forgot I had two reports due, plus there was (and is) a lot of Voyager to watch, plus I just exhausted myself playing DDR with meine Freundin...BUT, I'm working on it now, so expect it in a few. CR out. Crossed Reality March 16, 2004 2:00PM My NetFlix free trial started YESTERDAY, and my first three DVDs got here TODAY. Ratchet up another one for the Atlanta effect. Why did I resist joining Netflix for so long, you ask? Because I like to own things. Why did I finally join? I realized that there were several thousand dollars worth of TV season sets I wasn't realistically going to be able to afford for a long, long time. Alas, economics. Crossed Reality March 16, 2004 10:37AM Seeing as how my opinion has become one of the most sought after on the web as of late (...*cough*...), I've decided to throw my support behind 99x's new Anti-Neck Army, devoted to stamping out red neck bass ackwards society wherever it may be found. God bless you, gentlemen. Also, Lore has a new hobby in Little Fluffy Industries. Not original content by him, but a great place for fun little flash games. I'm particularly fond of that damn tower builder and Fishy. ZenZagg March 15, 2004 4:31PM That chapped lip picture is classic, Graeme. :P Maybe I should scan and release the PygmyFrontalPonyTailHeadGraeme picture. ;) Crossed Reality March 15, 2004 12:48PM Feature up, j0. ZenZagg March 15, 2004 11:29AM Wow, it is rather large, isn't it? ZenZagg March 15, 2004 11:27AM A little more backstory on the image. I saved it with my feet also. Yes, and "unled.bmp" is just Untitled.bmp with some letters stomped out (we had backspace mapped because it is jump in Worms.) I don't think we really thought about the file format at the time, we just knew we had to save it somehow. :D Crossed Reality March 15, 2004 9:54AM Speaking of features, my vacation officially ended this morning at 8:00am, so you'll get the rest of the story on our PA trip in a feature today, probably this afternoon, and then a Picasso strip soon. I also need to convert the image in Travis's feature into a JPEG. I don't know why we didn't save it that way in the first place, Paint for XP supports it...oh well. ZenZagg March 15, 2004 1:10AM As per our agreement in the ransom note, I have released a feature from the hostages. We won't bend so easily to your monopoly money next time! Hmm....perhaps, if you doubled the previous amount? :P Crossed Reality March 14, 2004 3:54AM I just finally watched Star Trek: Nemesis. I'd avoided it this long because of all the bad things I'd heard about it, and because my latent Trekker had died after Insurrection. Well, Nemesis is a lot better than that movie, for sure. I just hope they come to their senses and realize that TNG didn't need a Wrath of Khan to send themselves off...they needed an Undiscovered Country. Naturally, thanks to the memory download, if they really wanted to, Data would be about as dead as Spock. Crossed Reality March 12, 2004 2:29PM Yes, there will be a feature soon, but for now Jux is still on vacation. Not only that, but our host is upgrading our server soon. It should be a completely transparent process, but I figured I'd warn you. ZenZagg March 11, 2004 6:54AM Well, we're on our way back, and we had an absolute blast! Graeme got a ton of pics/movies and we have a few drawings (including one we all drew with our feet using a DDR pad.) All in all it was a refreshing exciting 4 days in Pennsylvania, and we all now have a better persona to associate with our now 21ish selves. This will happen again soon. We miss our best friend already. Crossed Reality March 11, 2004 3:42AM In just a few hours the journey back will begin. We've done quite a lot here in PA. For example, not only are we good at Dance Dance Revolution now, we also engineered a way to play a few games of Worms World Party on the TV...using just the dance pads to control it. More than a few games of Mario Party (3, 4 AND 5) were played, Dragon Dice were rediscovered, and two malls were ratted. Did I mention we did a lot of dancing? Guess what...we've got movies! ZenZagg March 6, 2004 6:38AM In the spirit of all-pervasive technology, you can view my mobile blog at this page where I will be (circumstances permitting) documenting the Jux Reunion! Crossed Reality March 6, 2004 1:08AM Just in case you wondered my opinion on Martha Stewart...I think the decision is perfect. Just perfect. Crossed Reality March 4, 2004 10:17PM I just got in an argument about the British Empire. Since she resorted to the "Generation Defense", I consider it won. Also, am I the only one annoyed that Puddle of Mudd essentially appropriated the entire chorus of A Perfect Circle's 3 Libras and stuck it on a few new verses to create a song? Crossed Reality March 4, 2004 9:08PM The new petition is up. The first one was a huge success, the next two haven't been so hot, so this is probably the last one for awhile. Plus, I'm currently out of things to protest. At least, I'm out of things that bother me enough for me to think of at the moment. Now then, this is probably the last feature you're going to get for a week, because, Travis and I are heading up to PA for Spring Break early Saturday morning. That's right, for the first time in like 6 years, the members of the Jux Entente are going to be in the same place at the same time. It should be awesome. I'm not saying you won't get any features, and you'll definitely get a news post or two, but for the most part, Jux is going on a vacation next week. Crossed Reality March 3, 2004 1:52PM I'm going to practice NOT replying to every smart ass remark someone tosses to me with an even wittier one. One day, this is going to lead to bloodshed. I just passed up a golden opportunity online. The problem, is, of course, that since it's online...it's sitting there for me...waiting...waiting for me to give into temptation. Crossed Reality March 2, 2004 7:24PM Rebirth Enterprises is at it again, what with a new feature and all. Gasp in astonishment and hunger as we explore the phone system of one of their subsidaries. In other words, feature up. Crossed Reality March 1, 2004 7:06PM Someone I know is ALREADY infected with the new Netsky, it seems, since I just got my first infected file. If it's one of you Jux readers, I must say I'm disappoited. But ten bucks says it's my sister. Crossed Reality March 1, 2004 1:16PM She came in through the bathroom window...I want you...sooooooo bad... Don't you hate those damned Abbey Road days? :D Crossed Reality February 29, 2004 11:04PM I'm pleased to announce that I have almost completely stopped myself from using British spellings of words. No more colour for me, if I can help it...but damnit, it looks so much better. Crossed Reality February 29, 2004 4:38PM There's a new feature up! Crossed Reality February 29, 2004 3:32PM How often do you get a chance to write a news post on the 29th of February? Crossed Reality February 28, 2004 2:15PM There's a new Picasso feature up. Thanks for worrying about me. Crossed Reality February 28, 2004 12:06AM I'm fine now. Crossed Reality February 27, 2004 7:26PM They towed it somewhereand I dn't know where but we were ging to have to to the body shop anyway because of the guy tyhat rearended me two weeks ago remember? his einsurance waffled and hwe ahdn't don'e it yet so 'm not sure who's going to bpay for what this tiem since it's dual damage and dno one was at fault tfor this accident because it doesn't make any sense that it happend and I can't figure out how. Crossed Reality February 27, 2004 7:25PM I just got hit again. Spun around in my own road. Nearly 360 degrees. Serious damage to the car. I've gone over the edge. Why does this keep happening to me? I don't even know how this one happened...it doesn't make any sense...I think the other guy is a liar but I can't prove it, because for some reason I can remember seeing him but I don't remember actually starting the turn although I remember him being farther back... I'm sick of my luck and of this shit happening to me. I may do a feature tonight, but I've got to get myself together. This isn't fair. My new car keeps getting hit and beaten and it's not fair and I don't know why I have this luck it never happened before. Arg. Too much shit and it's so cold I can't feelmy fingers Crossed Reality February 26, 2004 8:37PM Feature up. Crossed Reality February 26, 2004 8:19PM It's frozen solid here in Georgia. First real winter storm, and it comes after a week of spring weather. The scary thing is that it isn't even all that cold now. I got my new watch today, the first new one to grace my wrist since 6th grade. It's a strange experience. I shall write about it soon, since the accessory guides will be making a come back! Also, there's going to be a new feature online later tonight. I'll give you a hint: it's been a week since the last one. Crossed Reality February 25, 2004 10:13AM I've never been a regular viewer of 60 Minutes, for a variety of reasons, most of them involving laziness. However, if you haven't heard the buzz going around the internet, and you didn't see the show itself Sunday, then I must say that Andy Rooney is now my hero. Snopes.com has a nice overview, as they are want to do. Personally, although he obviously has a few problems dealing with reality and always has, Mel Gibson is still a great actor and has been in some of my favourite movies. Anything that ever happens on the 700 club is complete ignorant bullshit, though. I suppose if I ever get rich I'll go on public access with the 800 club, where me and nine other people will harp endlessly on the glories of socks, and how they speak to us. One told me that the Soviet Union would rise again, in British Columbia, somewhere around 3450. I certainly don't want to be here to see THAT happen. Crossed Reality February 24, 2004 9:44PM There's a new feature up, that it took me forever to write with our feature poster. I suppose it's time to suggest a new feature to Kenny for version 2.0, which is coming along with the REST of Jux Entente 2.0...sometime this summer. Crossed Reality February 24, 2004 1:08PM REV 22:20 + iPod + college campus = The feeling you're the protagonist in one of those dark moody movies about teenagers. Crossed Reality February 23, 2004 4:58PM Awesome! I just got my check for my part of the anti-trust settlement against the RIAA. It came to $13.86. Thanks, you heartless, soulless, clueless bastards. Oh, sorry. Gotta be PC. Bastards AND bitches. Crossed Reality February 23, 2004 2:16PM Many years ago I joked about how I'd like to have a soundtrack to my life. After walking around school with an iPod playing at all times for a day, I now know. It's...surreal. I've never really used my portable music players like this before, to actually listen while walking around. Now I can see why so many people are in love with their iPods on a whole new level. This is crazy. There are a few problems with the mini, though. For one, the 1.0 firmware is buggy and prevents the dock from charging and using the line out port at the same time. That will be fixed soon, I'm sure. Another may or may not be a problem: My battery seems to have depleted very quickly today, but that may just be because I didn't calibrate it with a full discharge yet. We'll see. Crossed Reality February 22, 2004 11:28PM There's a new feature up. Like all the best features that use few words, I'm sure it's going to offend someone. You'd think we'd be on the news sooner or later, wouldn't you? Crossed Reality February 21, 2004 7:18PM There's a new Picasso feature up! Crossed Reality February 21, 2004 12:42PM Can you do it again? I just realized something, and it's going to be a Picasso strip tonight, once I get off work. Crossed Reality February 19, 2004 2:29PM Graeme Ego Moment: It's HERE, it's CUTE, it's AWESOME, and YOU don't have one. Crossed Reality February 19, 2004 10:54AM Of more importance that any of that, of course, is that my iPod Mini is going to arrive today! Crossed Reality February 19, 2004 10:22AM There's a feature up. I'll get to it in a moment. I'm dreadfully sorry about the lost Picasso feature that I promised and, as of yet, have not delivered for two days. You see, Gunbound caught me, and would not let me go. It's become the official Jux Game of 2004, replacing Ragnarok Online (Jux Game 2002, 2003). This is quite a different experience. Both times we played Ragnarok, for example, the power scale of the Hat! clan was me as the leader, then Kenny, then Travis, in power. Now, based purely on ranking, it's Kenny, myself, and Travis. But since it's not an RPG, ranking doesn't matter nearly as much, and is only important because Kenny is the one who's going to have to create our guild. Skill level is only vaguely dependent on your rank. It's great. But, since it's competitive, we sometimes end up on different teams. We can deal with that. Now then, today's feature is the second in my series of ridiculous petitions, which I'm using to parody both the idiocy in the idea behind online petitions (have they ever done anything?), and whatever stupid thing someone in the U.S. is doing at the moment. Since I've already dealt with the marmosets who want to ban Homosexual Marriage, might as well move onto my most potent legal nemesis...the RIAA. Don't you dare forget to sign, my pretties! Crossed Reality February 18, 2004 12:27PM Well, Dean's done for, it seems. Too bad. At this point, it's a wash between Kerry and Edwards for me. I'm leaning towards Kerry, because Edwards is against NAFTA, and that is one of those things I hold holy as a Very Good Thing (tm). I'd rather have either one than Bush, and at this point it seems likely that one will be the other's VP. It's strange, but in the time Jux has been alive, I have completely flip-flopped from liking Bush to absolutely hating him. Hopefully the rest of the country will come to their senses based on his recent ideas and attacks against the Constitution. Also, sorry for no feature last night, I got distracted by the wonder of Gunbound and Junkyard Wars. Crossed Reality February 17, 2004 10:13AM This makes me glad to be alive. Might all of those same-sex marriages be overthrown? Sure. But at least they're doing something, and showing that equal rights means equal rights. If our petition ever gets off the ground, though, all those small minded bigots had better watch out. ;) Crossed Reality February 16, 2004 2:24PM There's a new feature up, and there may be another one from me tonight if I get really ambitious. If not, expect one tomorrow. Either way, it'll be a Picasso comic. Athena Falconess February 16, 2004 12:53AM You know Graeme, it's funny you should make a Tee-ball joke because my new job is scorekeeper at a ballpark. Thought I should mention that. I'm not sure whether my friends showing the Transformers movie was a good thing, but it was a nice break from Anime, which is actually what my feature's about when I get around to doing it which won't be for awhile. Crossed Reality February 15, 2004 5:28PM There is a new feature posted. We're going down to Dixie, Hurray, hurray! Actually, I'm lying about everything but the new feature. You might want to check it out. Why? Because I posted it, that's why. Also, Picasso is there. And, screw cameras and everything else, I just want my next cell phone to have Photoshop. Kitty Vertigo February 15, 2004 3:34AM Another Valentine's Day spent dressed in black. Groove. For those of you with "special loved ones", happy valentine's day. For those of you without, who happen to be pretty girls, hows you doin? Crossed Reality February 13, 2004 10:44PM Yes, but can you play Tee-Ball? And I appreciate your friends' showing the Transformers movie a few weeks ago. That made my day. Athena Falconess February 13, 2004 8:30PM I just looked through the archives and realized I haven't done a newspost in 2 months. Sorry. I just wanted to tell everyone yay, I got a new job. It's much better than the old one. I make more money and the hours are more flexible. Also, believe it or not, I'm working on a feature. We'll see how that goes. Crossed Reality February 12, 2004 8:18PM There's a new feature up. I've gotten so sick of stupid and pointless online petitions (to be fair, they're all pointless) that I've decided to create my own. Hell, I might actually just pick an issue a week! Jux can save the universe! Kitty Vertigo February 12, 2004 12:11PM It is funny to read that something had happened 2 hours ago, then notice that the time on it is 20 minutes ahead of the current time. So that it must have actually happend 1 hour and 40 minutes ago. Right now the clock say 11:11 AM. Maybe I will get around to fixing our time change someday. It seems to be only an hour off. Crossed Reality February 12, 2004 11:22AM Son of a WHORE. I got rear-ended two hours ago and just got home. So I have to fix my car. Again. My horrible luck with cars and car damage aside, this time I really feel worse for the other guy. He'd had the car three days, and his was totaled. Mine has a few scratches on the bumper, which means they'll probably replace it. Also, it was his birthday. He did everything right, too. A car in front of us slammed on its brakes; my car can stop on a dime, and it did...his couldn't and he skidded into me. Two minutes later, while we were still calling the police on the side of the road, someone ELSE was rear ended RIGHT NEXT TO US. They ended up pulled off the road ten feet ahead of us, and the same police car had to handle both accidents. I guess that was his vindication. Or bad luck on the part of all four of us. Oh well. I missed my class, so I'm going to go wait for work now, I guess. Crossed Reality February 10, 2004 9:10PM There's a new feature up. Apparently, we're now terrorizing the countryside. I quite enjoy it. Crossed Reality February 10, 2004 9:12AM The feature poster is fixed, and the new feature is up. Praise glory. Crossed Reality February 9, 2004 7:49PM Well, it seems that our Feature Poster just had some sort of strange spazam. While there is a feature by that name going up tonight, and it should have gone up ONCE then, obviously going up twice with no file created either time is not what it was meant to do. I'll get Kenny looking into whatever went wrong immediately. Crossed Reality February 8, 2004 4:16PM I did have two wonderful ideas for a feature that might go up tonight, but I seem to have lost the will to do much of anything other than a mound of German homework. Sadly, I doubt you'll get a feature tonight as a result. But who knows what might happen. Crossed Reality February 7, 2004 10:40AM I've got good news for all of you who've been keeping up with my ranting lately: the state Superintendent of Georgia realized she's an idiot, and Evolution (the word, AND the concept...imagine that) is going to be staying in Georgia text books. There aren't enough "Vote for me" buttons in the world to save her ass at the end of her term. Right now, you could run a pygmy wart hog and win. ...hey, that's a good idea! ZenZagg February 6, 2004 8:43PM This is a demonstration I am doing for a friend. Do you know what I am doing when I'm posting pictures of POLLEN, do you??? Crossed Reality February 6, 2004 2:20PM There's a new Picasso feature online, and it continues a long line of Picasso feature titles that make no damn sense at all. I do it because I love you. ZenZagg February 6, 2004 10:40AM Main Entry: evan·ge·lism Pronunciation: i-'van-j&-"li-z&m Function: noun 1 : the winning or revival of personal commitments to Christ 2 : militant or crusading zeal #2 is the one people hate, #1 is what I'm talking about. I'd say he was pretty evangelical! ;) Crossed Reality February 6, 2004 1:29AM Travis, the reason Jesus didn't go around acting like that was because he WASN'T evangelical. The modern (as opposed to the ancient, kill the heathens) evangelicalism formed in Britain during the Georgian era. Thus, when I say evangelicals, I'm talking about the people who bring about Sunday drink laws and believe this nation is founded on/by Christianity. ZenZagg February 5, 2004 11:18PM Re: Graeme's rant on mainstream Christianity, I'm guessing I was in the 'everyone else' category? I figure yes, just wanted to make sure. Anyway, adding to his rant, the reason mainstream Christianity is viewed as it is, is because it's a group that claims to follow a standard, and they are held accountable for straying from that. Here in America, pretty much anyone can say they are a member, and many do just to "fit in". Then, these people (who are in more of an institution/beuracracy than a spiritual congregation) go out and do stupid things because 1.) they really aren't committed to it for anything other than a label and a social club, and 2.) they are unaware of/have forgotten that common sense and Christianity _can_ go hand in hand, but it requires thinking, reasoning, and research. Some people just want to keep everything black and white. People who are in a social club don't care to read the club history, or the rules and regulations. They just want to swim in the pool. And every time someone who claims to be a Christian goes and makes headlines with some bone-headed stunt, I have to deal with the general public's assumption that whatever one Christian does, every single one of us must believe and live by whatever that person says or does. A lot of this is caused by people trying to enforce their personal opinions and morals on others by using Christianity as a vehicle, even if it conflicts with its teachings. Many people who aren't Christian look to themselves for a reference of right and wrong. The only way you can prove that a certain thing works better is by living it, and proving that it does indeed lead to a more fulfilling life. Forcing the issue by forcing others to think what you think purely because you say so not only makes you look pushy and controlling, it also takes away any idea of free will, which in the light of choice and faith pretty much makes you look like a hypocrite. As for the news, this is why law is neutral to religion, because if you make religious aspects a legal matter, people who follow only do so because they are forced to, you can't make people believe something by forcing them to live a certain way. Law (in theory) is an evolved set of ideals irrespective of individual opinion, that have proven serve the greater good of the society. The only way for law to work is to have a universally respected authority, and the only way for that to happen is to keep everything objective instead of subjective, so people don't start breaking the law because "I don't believe in the idea behind the law". So if you have a proposition to change the law, back it up with reasoning that at least most people can see the logic of. Back to Christianity; the only way people are going to see any different are if they see you living by example, and not by words--and not having anything to do with some of the wack-jobs that pass themselves off as Christian. If you claim to follow an ideal, actually FOLLOW it, not do whatever the crap you want and expect people to respect you because of a label you slap on yourself. Going around condemning people, only associating with people in 'the club', and trying to directly control other people are not extensions of love and free will. Graeme, I agree with most of what you say; and as a Christian, sometimes I agree with Gandhi when he said "The greatest enemy of Christianity is Christians." But I disagree with your hate of anything evangelical, because I think that that sentiment (shared by many, many others) stems from the way many 'typical' Christians go about it. In the bible, did Jesus go out thumping the torah, judging everyone about everything, and commanding people to follow him or perish? No, he lived his life by action, and his example caused people to be curious and ask questions; he never forced the issue on anyone who didn't want a part of it. I don't want to say that I'm perfect, or that I never make mistakes, but I think the advice "respect is a two-way street" could do many Christians (and everyone else for that matter) a lot of good. I apologize to our readers who have been subjected to two large ranty newsposts in one day, but it had to be said. Thanks for listening. P.S.: Don't give up on anticipating my features, I've been getting steady contract work for over two weeks straight and it's AWESOME. I still love you, I've just been pinging around the metro Atlanta area like some sort of geek pinball! Crossed Reality February 5, 2004 9:04PM Amazing. After googlebot's last troll through our pages, he apparently finally decided to index our images. My favourite part of this, other than yet more traffic? If you search for a Jux writer by proper name, say "Graeme Hefner", you get their signature image. If you search for them by alias, say "Kitty Vertigo", the first thing you get is him in a goofy hat. Also, Samantha, your email is working perfectly. Don't use the Jux main page for tech support, especially if you're wrong :P SamiamtheLast February 5, 2004 7:32PM I must say that I believe the majority of the staff is indeed innocent. It is true we are burdened with a level of understanding concerning humanity which many other people do not seem to possess; however, I believe this understanding has helped us to understand that really no one is innocent anymore if we consider ourselves corrupt. Indeed, ignorance is innocence, but what is innocence if we do not know what corruption truly is? Just thought I'd express that particular thought. Have a Lovely Evening, SamiamtheLast Also, I have a complaint. My staff email is not working :( Fix it. I wonder... should I have asked nicely? And no, Graeme, it's not about my password. Crossed Reality February 5, 2004 11:10AM You're hereby warned. Graeme is angry again, and has ranted a news post of feature length. What Mr. Bush fails to realize when he calls the new gay marriage decisions "troubling" is that, yes, marriage is a "sacred institution between a man and a woman." Sacred. That means what you're saying means jack shit legally, Mr. President. Get your fucking church out of politics, please. In fact, can I have dumbass moralizing removed everywhere? While I agree that CBS should be fined for the superbowl display, it's not because I feel it's somehow wrong for them to show Janet Jackson's boob on TV (not that I really wanted to see it), but, rather, because there was no warning before hand. I think the FCC's indecency and obscenity laws are some of the biggest examples of unconstitutionality this side of the Patriot Act and Evolution debates (don't get me started again). TV ratings? Great! Saying that something can't be show on TV? Violation of the Bill of Rights! I hate evangelical religion, because they're never happy unless they make everyone else miserable. Proof in point. Not just them, though, of course. Lieberman's Jewish, and I'd love to shove him down a well. But, hey, I'll respect their constitutional right to say whatever the hell THEY please about their morals and how we're corrupting their children. Lord forbid they give birth to a child smart enough to tell fantasy from reality, or bother to raise said kid themselves. Gotta have the government do it. I'm too busy with God and my Big Mac to care about my offspring! Hypocrisy and Christianity. Who would have guessed? It'd be so much easier if they were all this way, but they're not. It's the ignornant few that ruin the religion for everyone else, like Travis. This country was founded on rationalism and the Enlightenment. Why is it run today by people who think John Locke is a comic book character? Crossed Reality February 4, 2004 9:15PM Feehahchoore posted, kind sirs. Crossed Reality February 4, 2004 1:49PM The flyers you see in the various buildings on campus reflect greatly on the interests of the students that frequent them and their reasons for being in college in the first place. The Burruss building, which is used for almost everything but is the headquarters of the college of business and has most of those classes, features puzzle pieces on the wall praising things like teamwork and fliers offering jobs and saying they'll give you help on your resume. Wonderful! The Nursing building? Mostly stuff put up by the wellness center, useful hints on gyms and things near by, as well as pictures of every person to graduate from the school of nursing since its inception. My own nominal home, the Social Science building, appears to me to have the most interesting. Maybe because they're focused at me. But the variety is definately greater. In addition to dozens of fliers for various study abroad programs, there are newspaper clippings, car ads, fliers for plays, and gigantic political cartoons. Foreign study dominates them all, though. The PE building has old jerseys on the wall and trophy cases. Let's call it the ego building. I've only been in it twice, though, so maybe I'm missing the area where they have the giant replica of David. And I suppose it's no worse than all the playbills in the Stillwell Theatre. Crossed Reality February 4, 2004 12:48AM A contemporary of Papa Groundhog. He bit anyone or thing that told him the world was getting warmer. God told him it would always be cold. Kitty Vertigo February 3, 2004 9:29AM Today is a snow day! I love snow days. I get to sleep a lot! I am so happy. Snow sucks, but today I don't have to go to classes! Meow!! Kitty Vertigo February 2, 2004 8:44PM Amazing! There is a new Kitty feature! This is my first one this year, and I think it is pretty funny. Meow. Crossed Reality February 2, 2004 7:27PM There's a rather fiery feature up. I'm proud of it. Kitty Vertigo February 2, 2004 2:52AM It is good to be yelled at for stuff you don't even know you do. It is good to know people still care. It is good to fix things and be happy and meow at stuff. ZenZagg February 1, 2004 4:29PM So....busy....*pant* *pant* The features are crystalizing slowly but surely, can't make any promises for tonight, but the 'holdover' feature wont be too hard to write on a whim. I got back from some work I was doing at 5AM this morning. Then I got up 4-ish hours later and helped configure it in time for service. It's still fun to engineer a triple-projector dual-PC system all being managed off of one monitor, keyboard, and mouse, though. Engineering must be backed up with actually making it work, and that's where the sweat comes in. :D Crossed Reality February 1, 2004 3:47PM Feature posted. It's not all that good...I'm hoping Zen will finish one of his two tonight for fun-ness. I just needed to come clean. Crossed Reality January 31, 2004 1:27AM Well, the spam mail that drove me to create a certain feature was, I thought, the worst spelled one that was out there. Then I got this today (I saw the title flash by as my junk filter deleted it in Thunderbird, and I thought it might be one that was hit accidentally. It wasn't): -- Get the most out of your lobve liufe. Orsder your Vbiagbra and Sdupver Viqagkra savfely and securkely onlipne. Cibalzis (Suiper Vivaqgra) takes affcect rigyht away and lazsts for dayys! Ewntqer Hepre -- ...and people actually by PRODUCTS from these places? Crossed Reality January 29, 2004 7:35PM There's a new feature up. I had to check and make sure Zen hadn't posted one before doing it, though. I saw the early tests of his new haul. In other news, the Link Farm page recieved a slight overhaul today as part of the ongoing work on the site. It's still not very pretty, but it's no longer half-assed and it has a lot more links than it did. Hurray for progress. Most of the other changes we've done to the site will become visible all at once. Specifically, those that are news and feature oriented. Crossed Reality January 28, 2004 10:54PM There be a new feature here! (No more lies, no sir) Get under that shelter, there! (I ate the pie, oh yeah) Crossed Reality January 28, 2004 9:59AM Well, as of today I noticed it's official. The road I took to park at school every day for the past three years is gone. Entirely. It's been replaced by a grassy green hill and a sidewalk. I'm not sure entirely how I'm supposed to respond to this. Park of me wants to celebrate the environmentalism of it all. The rest of me just wonders why the hell they felt the need to move the road over 100 feet and end it in a traffic circle. Progress, I suppose. SamiamtheLast January 27, 2004 9:15PM I must say I'm quite impressed, guys. I like the neojux icons, especially the news icon. Also, I may post a feature tomorrow. I think it's time we all knew the truth about Mars... Until then... who knows... Maybe I'll go home. Crossed Reality January 26, 2004 7:04PM Well, I've had an interesting day as far as reference goes. Not only did I finally get the definitions to prove to my girlfriend and mother once and for all that ham is NOT pork, but I also just basically got to tell someone that they may have just won the lottery. After opening a "really old chest", the found two coins. One of them, and they showed it to me, looks exactly like a Brasher 1787 Doubloon, EB on Wing. I'm no appraiser, and since there are only 7 of these things known it fills me with doubt, but it looked exactly like coins I have seen from that era, slightly off-center pressing and all. Lord only knows if it's real. If it is, they just found lucky number 8, and I got to tell them that the last one sold went for $750,000...in 1979. Kitty Vertigo January 26, 2004 6:03PM For anyone who cares, and it had better be most of you, I am done hand copying the first 279 hand made news posts into the SQL archive. Hopefully, if I can whip up a helper, the remaining unknown number of news posts will be SQLized before the day is done. In doing this, I have realized that Jux has a history and life of its own now. For anyone who is extremely bored, I'd recommend glancing through the news archive. It is actually interesting to see how we all develop and become a part of Jux. Obviously, Graeme is the most active member of this site, but we all have our Great Moments in (Modern) Jux Entente History. Meow. Crossed Reality January 26, 2004 2:49AM There is a new Picasso feature. Also, it's worth noting that Kenny was the first one of us to ever get a job. And now he's the first one of us to retire. Awesome! Kitty Vertigo January 25, 2004 11:11PM Late 98, early 99. I think. Crossed Reality January 25, 2004 8:40PM Just curious Kenny...when was the last time you WERE a part of the working world? Kitty Vertigo January 25, 2004 7:50PM Hi everyone. I just wanted to let everyone know that I am retiring permentantly from the working world. You see, last night I won big! I forget the exact numbers that were displayed on those big balls, but they matched my numbers. It was so great to finally be able to yell "BINGO!" and mean it. My prize was a DVD of SpaceBalls. I will never have to work again! Miaou. ZenZagg January 25, 2004 5:22AM Feature Up! Also, I'd like to take a moment to recognize all the hard work Kenny and Graeme are doing to facilitate the move over to SQL-based pages. I've seen some of the prototyping, and you'll be in for a few nice surprises. I've been working a lot lately, and when I haven't been working, I've been sleeping or otherwise busy, so I haven't been able to lend my SQL expertise to the project just yet; however, I have been providing my input on some things along the way, and things look great so far. I don't know if Graeme wants you guys seeing this, but he made a cute image bestowing Kenny the honor of Employee of the Year for his work on the news/feature posters and now this new SQL stuff. It's not official yet, but I'll let you in on the secret: ZenZagg January 23, 2004 11:50PM When a catastrophic physical drive failure results in 37GB of carefully distilled data (accumulated over 10 years) to be reduced to a partition/FAT table-less mess, some of us would break down and cry. For some reason, I am 1/4 saddened, and 3/4 fascinated. For I am now a data archaeologist; digging through the vast and extensive ruins of the badlands, combing for any semblance of what was once a goldmine of stored nostalgia and repository of pack-rat efficiency. Originally, I was devastated because all my creative work (features/images/poetry) have been scattered to bits, but I see it now as a vast storehouse of surprisingly random inspiration. Using my trusty Ontrack EasyRecovery, I have dozens of directories of randomly corrupted files related only by extension. Take a blender to 37GB of data, and what do you get? I hope something interesting! Crossed Reality January 23, 2004 9:37PM Feature posted! Crossed Reality January 23, 2004 2:05PM Well, I just tried to post a feature, but it looks like we have a little bug that replaced the little bug we fixed yesterday. It'll be up later, I suppose. It's funny though! Crossed Reality January 23, 2004 12:31AM I feel bad that there was no new feature today, but I actually spent the entire day working on the website. Kenny and I are busy giving this place one hell of a make over. What I concentrated on today was trying to figure out a way to put "Latest Features" from the Features page, where it really doesn't make much sense, onto the main page. I literally created about 11 designs today, and Kenny did two or three himself. So, that's where the Jux time went. But, I promise you'll be pleased when we're done. Everytime we do something new to make the site run better (we're currently migrating to SQL, in case you hadn't heard) feature quality and frequency improves. At least, it's better than what it would have been otherwise. Think about that ;) Crossed Reality January 22, 2004 3:41PM According to my MicroFit assessment, I'm in pretty damn good shape. My body fat composition level is the same as an athlete's (I'm assuming they mean real ones, not the people who get paid millions), my blood pressure is excellent, and I'm plenty fit everywhere else. Who the hell would have guessed, eh? Crossed Reality January 20, 2004 7:03PM As was foretold in prophecy, there is now a new feature up for you to read. I was going to do a Juxtapositions on the subject, but I decided that would be both heavy handed and beating a dead horse. So, I took the Jonathan Swift route. Spam has gotten ridiculous though, in that to avoid filters it's reaching the point where the language doesn't even vaguely resemble English. Crossed Reality January 19, 2004 11:11PM I should get you a new feature tomorrow (Not today, as the astute among you might have expected). As well, I would like to say that I am astouded by how stupid the Iowa caucuses are. Since it's in the news so much lately, I just thought I'd let that be known. Crossed Reality January 19, 2004 3:04AM That is only a TASTE of what you have to see at the funniest site I've seen in awhile, based around one of the worst gaming systems in recent memory. That's going in the Link Farm, totally. I was thinking about sending in a picture of me holding a computer tower to my face, until I saw that picture. How can I top a damn PowerMac G5? I have an idea, but it might break my spine. I have another idea, it might not. Crossed Reality January 17, 2004 3:45PM Apparently, there IS a silver bullet which completely disables me. No, you don't get to know what it us. But feel free to look for it! Our migration to SQL continues to go at a pyscho-crazy speed. Crossed Reality January 17, 2004 3:24PM There's a new feature up. I find it hilarious. You might not. If so, don't tell me. I don't think I could take the rejection. Crossed Reality January 16, 2004 8:43PM Beyond Good and Evil is awesome. I got it for Christmas, and I'm just now playing it. Of the games I've played lately, I'd say it's better than Prince of Persia, but not as good as Double Dash. Expect an update on the status of Jux design changes soon. Here's a hint: there won't be many. Crossed Reality January 15, 2004 10:42AM There's a feature a-going up right now. It's a Bobby the Deity story, of sorts, and the first one since June or so. How about that? ZenZagg January 15, 2004 2:42AM Yes, my suave, circa 1999, self. :D Crossed Reality January 15, 2004 1:29AM Doesn't little Travis look so cuuuuuuuute? :D ZenZagg January 14, 2004 10:25PM For the record, it was Kenny's idea! Anyway, I swooped in after you left and Tazered the pimps you were dealing with, AND took the rest of the money they had. Sara is safe at home, and I have armed her with a special form of the WaffleBox, which I modified with the Tazer I used earlier. I have made one for myself as well, to deal with this insurgency. For those unaware what a WaffleBox is, it is the device generating the sparks in these pictures. Yes, that is Kenny's younger sibling cowering in the corner. Why you gotta make me hurt you Graemey baby? Crossed Reality January 14, 2004 7:58PM Yes, let's raise fines Mr. FCC! I mean, getting rid of them would only be constitutional. No reason we need to obey that little Bill of Rights thing when there's lazy ass parents and fuckhead Christian activist groups involved. Crossed Reality January 14, 2004 9:49AM Thoughts from the drive: 1) It is okay to like Karma Chameleon. It is NOT okay to like Boy George. 2) I am neither conservative, nor liberal, but I'm way too fiery to be a moderate. From this point on, I am a Cohohiberal. 3) Sweet tarts are awesome. Kitty Vertigo January 14, 2004 8:30AM Oh yeah? We'll I went over BOTH of your heads, straight to the Jux Dictatorship. He said, "Of course we won't sell me to gypsies. I'm not worth enough for one of those high tech glowing things, let alone a slushie machine. We'll sell Travis's girlfriend instead." Heh, just a little joke Graeme. Crossed Reality January 13, 2004 11:15PM It should also be noted that the Parliament of the Juxly Isles was called in regards to a decision made earlier today, and decided that it was against the interest of the people to sell me to buy another gadget. Instead, we sold Travis's girlfriend to a Budapest brothel. The money was better, and he never really liked her anyway. We think he'll be much happier now. With the extra cash, we got a slushie machine. It's shiny. Crossed Reality January 13, 2004 11:12PM There's a new feature up. It's a single panel comic. I did it JUST for you! Kitty Vertigo January 13, 2004 6:21PM We really are sorry Graeme. If it makes you feel any better I will name mine after you. Or maybe that hot girl in my class, but I guess I'd have to find out her name first. Either way I'm happy, Zen is happy, and hopefully Graeme will be happy in his new home. ZenZagg January 13, 2004 6:19PM Dear Jux Readers: I'm afraid we have some unfortunate news to relate. After seeing the product video for this little beauty, we have decided to exercise a little known clause of the Jux Governatorial Declaration: According to the exceptions laid out in Article III, Section A, Sub-Section 2, Paragraph 2c, Kenny and I have sold Graeme to an amicable tribe of local Gypsies in order to make our down payments. As a result, depending on his new masters' restrictions, he may or may not be posting as regularly. Knowing him, I am sure he will still find a way. We're sorry Graeme, but we had to do it. You'll understand, won't you? Crossed Reality January 13, 2004 5:30PM He may not post features, but everyone still loves Kenny. He is, after all, the official Jux Entente mascot! Plus he does lots of stuff our lovely readers never see. Kitty Vertigo January 13, 2004 4:37PM In other news, that you most likely will not care about, I am taking 18 credits this semester, which is 6 classes. They are mostly fun classes so it won't be too bad for me, but I will most likely be too busy for you. Its not like I don't neglect you enough, I mean I havn't posted a feature in monthes. At least I don't hate you like SOME people. Mew. Crossed Reality January 13, 2004 10:39AM Mondays are going to be hell for me from now on. Honestly, I wouldn't expect a feature on a Monday, from me, for a nice, long time. May, perhaps. Kitty Vertigo January 12, 2004 1:19AM I am back at school. I had a cool feature planned, but I didn't get any pictures of it before I left, and it isn't really that cool without pictures. I also had another idea of a feature, but then I forgot it. I will struggle to think of it, but don't expect anything. Meow. Crossed Reality January 11, 2004 10:17PM There's a new feature up, containing something of use to all of society. Crossed Reality January 10, 2004 9:49AM Georgia got about a centimeter of snow where I live last night. Naturally, that means that people are staying off the roads and huddling, afeared. Usually this makes sense, since we have ice storms with only tiny bits of snow, but the roads are actually clear today. Quite strange. I'm also tired, it's early, and I think there are wolves after me. Crossed Reality January 9, 2004 6:39PM There's a new feature up. Crossed Reality January 8, 2004 11:27AM Nevermind, she just did. I stand corrected. Kenny's still cooler than me, though. Crossed Reality January 8, 2004 10:23AM Ourly newly redheaded Laurie didn't even say hi to me at school today. She's got new friends. Well, I'll be shucksed. Also, it's really cold in Georgia. Finally, I'm going to work on a feature tonight, but Kenny has done the AWESOMEST THING EVER, and I really hope he'll tell you about it if he gets the chance. Crossed Reality January 7, 2004 9:56AM It's good to be back at school, but I'm beginning to think that our administration has some secret agenda, trying to see just how much they can mess up parking before we all revolt. Yesterday I recieved an email from the school warning me that parking was going to be horrible. This terrified me. I mean, they created a giant mountain of dirt on a few hundred spaces and didn't feel the need to tell anyone. Guess what they did while we were gone? Destroyed the old, nice, road which they had just finished repainting with new lines, and replaced it with a new, gritty one! And get this...in the four way stop that this created in a different location, there is now a freaking TRAFFIC CIRCLE. We have a TRAFFIC CIRCLE on campus now. Amazingly, the only parking spaces I saw that were inaccessible were the three that they had slung-parked a campus club car across. Hoy. I think this is the secret to why our tuition hasn't risen as much. They can charge as many people as they want to come here, and then assume that only a fraction of them can ever actually come to campus and use up resources! There's no need to build facilities for them! Hell, if you need more money...destroy more parking! Crossed Reality January 6, 2004 4:41PM Well, I've ordered my iPod mini, have you? Those things are totally hat, especially when you consider the cost of the other tiny solutions. Also of note, I had to take my girlfriend to the emergency room at 1:00am last night. They think she's in the early stages of her appendix getting pissed off and exploding, but all of their bloodwork and CT scans showed up nothing...and they wouldn't if it was extremely early. She's back home now, but has to go back in a few days to make sure. Crossed Reality January 4, 2004 9:30PM There's another new feature up, even though I haven't fixed the minor problems with the new feature page yet. Damn me. Also, Jux Entente Press may or may not eventually be a real thing, just so you know. Crossed Reality January 3, 2004 10:43PM Hey, there's a feature! Crossed Reality January 1, 2004 4:15PM There's a feature up! Whooo! ;) Crossed Reality January 1, 2004 2:01PM Happy New Year everyone. There should be a Picasso feature or two later tonight (emphasis on 'should'), and you know the fun part of that? We get to see if the feature poster still works! Kitty Vertigo December 31, 2003 3:59AM Is there anyone out there like me? Crossed Reality December 29, 2003 5:30PM "These Days" Making all these waves and I wonder where the days went. I sit and think of you, I hope the feeling's mutual. I'm seeing all you gave and, It somehow don't seem even close to what I'd do. To break in two seems natural. These days are great, there's work to do. Would you like to work with me, I'd love to work you. These days are great and so are you. I think it's something positive, and negative too. Playing all these games and, I wonder who's to blame it. I sit and think it's you, I'm sure the feelings mutual. We're growing cold. Its getting old. We should have known it's over. We'll be a real team, I told you. -- Damn, I love that song. BLUE SPARKS! Crossed Reality December 28, 2003 10:50PM Overall, it's pretty accurate. The samurais are wearing armor that's a few centuries out of date, but that could have been (and most likely was) done in plot as a way to show they were revolting against the new ways. As for batteries...shucks. SamiamtheLast December 28, 2003 8:07PM I am now a sassy redhead - a sassy redhead who really wants a briefcase. Also, I really want to use my bear massager, but I don't have any batteries. I think it was very cruel of you, Graeme, to not include batteries. Oh, and I really liked The Last Samurai. I seriously need to read more about Eastern history and culture. I must find that movie's accuracy flaws. Crossed Reality December 27, 2003 11:28PM Double Dash is indeed Jux Entente approved, as are all the Governator movies and the Complete Far Side. ZenZagg December 26, 2003 5:46PM "Mario Kart: Double Dash!" is a gas, gas, gas! I've never had so much fun in a nintendo game. I highly recommend it! It is just as fun hopping in someone else's kart as it is going solo, and some of the levels are INSANE. I also got an 89-piece toolkit for my various contracting jobs, which incidentally fits nicely in my briefcase. Kitty Vertigo December 26, 2003 4:32PM DDR for christmas... somebody kill me please... it is wonderful wonderful torture. SamiamtheLast December 25, 2003 7:24PM That was sooooo cheesy. God, I love you. Crossed Reality December 24, 2003 3:29AM Feature up! Crossed Reality December 23, 2003 3:58AM I love TIME magazine. It is the most consistently least-biased news source I can find. Even when they express things I don't agree with, I know they're not talking through their ass. They give large amounts of coverage to the Democratic candidates, but, at the same time, they talk about Bush with actual respect for his actions rather than someone they're amazed with whenever he does something right (and then point out how it's not going to matter in the election. I'm looking at you, Newsweek). While I'm talking about news magazines, I guess I should say that CNN is the best online news site in my opinion, although it lacks the perfect balance of it's corporate brother; as well, the channel has gone downhill. The worst? Fox News can bite me, and Newsweek isn't fit to touch my ass, although they do pick some awesome quotes sometimes. Crossed Reality December 22, 2003 8:13PM There's a new feature up, and idea I got today while...well, you can guess after reading the feature. My girlfriend gave me my Christmas presents today. I got a snowman dinner/cup/plate set, a double-headed spiked flail (!!), a punching dagger (!!!), and many more interesting things. Like James Hetfield buttons. Also, I've been meaning to plug this for awhile, and better late than never I guess. If you're in the mood for some extra holiday cheer, go check the special Christmas Bonus Comics that Elliott is doing over at Spelling the Vacuum. Crossed Reality December 20, 2003 11:14AM There's a new feature up, and it eats meat for dinner! Crossed Reality December 19, 2003 4:59PM The RIAA loses a big one! Thank the lord! There's some sanity left in the courts of this country! Crossed Reality December 19, 2003 4:31PM Yep, that's the one mean old Mister Hefner vetoed. ZenZagg December 19, 2003 1:33PM By the way, this was the sig that could have been ;) Crossed Reality December 19, 2003 4:04AM Let it be know that I am much happier with Zen's new-new signature, and I lodge an official "Uhrm..." with Kenny's new colour. ;) ZenZagg December 19, 2003 2:58AM This is not to say I won't be tweaking it in the future, but I am quite weary of the boring blocky single Z that I've had for so long. We'll see how it goes. ZenZagg December 19, 2003 2:55AM That's the spirit Kenny! Now that my sig fits the strict RGB type restrictions, I see no need to revert or otherwise change it again. Adversity breeds innovation! I like the mini-Z's ;) Kitty Vertigo December 19, 2003 2:09AM It has come to my attention that we are actually allowed to use the colours red and green in our sigs. Therefore, I present to you Bob the Martian the way he was meant to be. Pure red. Who ever heard of a blue martian anyways? Crossed Reality December 18, 2003 12:29PM There's a new Juxtapositions feature up. ZenZagg December 18, 2003 12:24PM I made that post about 30 seconds after you. ESPN strikes again! Crossed Reality December 18, 2003 12:08PM I reverted it until you can fix it. ZenZagg December 18, 2003 11:55AM Well, I did change my sig, somehow it appears to have reverted to the old one, which I deleted. I'll sort it out when I get home. Crossed Reality December 18, 2003 11:54AM Or, rather, he will be updating his signature. ZenZagg December 18, 2003 3:51AM Yes, along with my bio, I've updated my sig. I felt like I needed something more stylish to match the fresher bio. Much less boring, I think ;) Crossed Reality December 18, 2003 2:46AM The news, she is good! I just updated the Members page, and for the first time since this site was a grey and white wonder called Totally Hat!, Zen has updated his bio. Mine is slightly updated as well, and everyone's email address as been changed to a new @juxentente.com version. Rejoice! Later...today, I guess...long after I take my cat to the vet in the morning, I will be writing a Juxtapositions article about just what's been going on here with the move and everything, and changes you may or may not be seeing in Jux in the near future. Bait that breath, people. Crossed Reality December 17, 2003 11:18PM Feature posted. I'm working on a new Juxtapositions, too. It was going to go up tonight, but since we had some problems with the feature poster that took up some time, I'm going to shunt writing it until tomorrow. Crossed Reality December 17, 2003 4:36PM Hello. If this message works, the following is true: 1) All of our posters are working, so far as we know. 2) We have completed our move to the new server. 3) She looks JUST like Marsha Brady and, finally: 4) Return of the King is the best movie, ever! Thanks folks. I should be back with not one but TWO new features for your perusal tonight. Crossed Reality December 15, 2003 9:23PM During the physical move of Jux, I forgot to mention that our posters may be broken for a few days, preventing us from having any updates. This also means that my feature idea from earlier is going to be on hold, to make transferral easier for now. As soon as the posters work on the NEW server, Jux will be updating again. Until everything is working, this is the last newspost you'll see. I encourage you to enjoy our wonderful, voluminous archive while you wait. Also, Merry Christmas ;) Crossed Reality December 15, 2003 6:19PM Sorry for the lack of news updates, but it's been a busy few days. Travis and I had to break into my girlfriend's house after she lost her keys, for example. I'm proud to say that we are capable of breaking and entering without doing any actual damage to the house! As well as that, the much bally-hooed server move is about to take place. It should be mostly transparent on your end, if all goes according to plan. If not, we're very sorry. I should have a feature for you tonight as well, but I can't be sure of that, since I'm currently updating all of our registrar information. I will continue to be busy through most of the Christmas break, as you know, so feature production is going to continue to be down. However, if you look at last year, we had an upswing in January that you can expect to repeat. ZenZagg December 15, 2003 5:29PM Apologies for the downtime everyone, we're looking into a more reliable hosting situation even as I type. Crossed Reality December 12, 2003 3:25PM I'm sorry, but some things are just ridiculous. How about this? Fuck you! If you're really worried, use some of that income to plant corn. Crossed Reality December 12, 2003 1:49PM New feature up. Crossed Reality December 12, 2003 2:46AM He may be my favourite author, but the only one of Stephen King's books I find the least bit scary is The Shining. You know why? I don't have any real fear of werewolves, or fantastical situations...but, like most creative people, I do have a deep-set fear against going completely and utterly insane. Crossed Reality December 12, 2003 12:50AM Feature. It's a new "Diary of a Christmas Tree." Hopefully, you'll find enjoyment in it. I know I did! Picasso feature tomorrow. (later today) Crossed Reality December 11, 2003 1:06AM Detritus is being put on a longer time frame that originally expected, due both to Travis's lack of time, and my own, as well as the fact that I burn with the desire to pursue the novel again. I'm not sure what kick started it, but I have long story ideas bouncing around my head and I know I need to get the third draft of A Man on a Hill ready and out to agents. Detritus will continue to be worked on amidst all of this. It will also give Travis some time to think up new things. Crossed Reality December 10, 2003 4:21PM I think I fixed the link problem in the post below now. Crossed Reality December 10, 2003 4:18PM It seems that Lore has again dusted off something from Brunching. Without further ado: Crossed Reality December 9, 2003 5:32PM The good news is that tomorrow is my last final. I've already finished all of my Christmas shopping, and other pre-holiday holiday preparations, so that I should have for Jux again relatively soon. I've not even managed to play Final Fantasy X-2 in over a week, or read anything for pleasure in just as long, or go to a movie, or anything else I like to do, so don't think that Jux is the only thing that's been getting the shaft. Unfortunately, as of yesterday I appear to be slightly ill. Fatique, sore throat, what have you. I should lick it in just a few days, per my usual, but if it drags on it might cost you a feature or two. I always get sick around Christmas, so I guess my ChristCold(tm) came a bit early this year. Crossed Reality December 9, 2003 11:59AM As much fun as this is, the debate probably needs to stop being housed on our mainpage. ZenZagg December 9, 2003 8:00AM Oh yea, I forgot one more thing... If you do decide to date other people, having all other situations and preliminary motives, etc, excluded: What if you fall deeply in love with the person you meet? What if he does? Would you give that up simply for the sake of getting back together? Would he? That's another thing most people don't stop to think about when they consider doing that. When you "see other people", you're doing just that, not simply dating robots until you can get back with more experience. What will the "other" person think of you when you tell them that you were just using them for experience? One of you will either date someone else and realize that there's no need to go back (thus causing pain to you or him), OR, you will date someone else, and eventually have to tell this person that they were just a temp job and break up with them to go back to him. And then you have to deal with the jealousy and comparing each other to your previous interim dates. MESSY! Athena Falconess December 9, 2003 1:45AM Okay, I guess I should throw another female voice into the mix so Sam doesn't feel so overwhelmed. I don't really know enough about the situation to automatically say it's a bad idea, even though usually it is. For the most part, I have to agree with Travis. If someone suggests, "seeing other people" then they usually already have someone in mind. However, I do have to argue his point about "...getting the experience...together." I really don't think you can get the full dating experience with just one person. But, then again, if you've both dated other people already....then why do you need to date more people? So, if you two have already dated other people, there really is no point in wanting to "see other people." But like I said, I really don't know enough about the situation to make a fair call on it. So, Sam, truthfully, do what you feel is right. Don't worry about other people's opinion. It'll just confuse you and make you question yourself too much. Trust me on this. Kitty Vertigo December 8, 2003 4:34PM Zen is totally on target. Why the hell should you let him see other people? Are they BETTER than you? If so, why does he even care about you? If not, why would he want to see them? I say, fuck him up the nose. ZenZagg December 8, 2003 2:28AM Sam, The whole see other people thing...you see, the problem with that whole idea is: 1.) Usually the person who brings up such an idea has alterior motives (i.e. he wants you to enable him to date someone he has his eye on without feeling guilty.) 2.) This is perfect for the initiator because they always have a fallback option (you) if this 'other person' doesn't work out. 3.) Why even have a relationship if you're not even committed to each other? 4.) Even if you both did see other people, and got back together by some miracle, there will always be that rift of trust between you, that time when you or the other wasn't faithful, wasn't committed to the relationship. You will always question just how stable the relationship will be, always evaluate others to see maybe if there is a better deal. The only seemingly logical excuse I've heard from people who do this is 'to get dating experience so we can be together in better harmony'. That is bull crap, and all you have to do is ask yourself "What's wrong with getting this experience...together?" to see the absurdity of it. In closing, those who propose this idea really don't want to have the responsibility of dating the other person, still want to pretend they are single, and still have that wonderful contingency plan to fall back on if their little foray fails. Then they can just subsist on you until a better catch comes along, and maybe that time you'll just get an unexpected painful dumping. My honest opinion is he wants out of the relationship without much conflict, but still wants to use you for security. This is not the behavior of a faithful or committed person. Crossed Reality December 8, 2003 2:09AM To quote me: Crossed Reality March 2, 2003 6:28PM I love my CD/MP3 collection. It's so expansive and essentially random that occassionally I'll just put the thing on shuffle (MP3s only, even a 51 cd changer isn't enough to properly randomize my CD collection) or just go visually diving through it to see what turns up that I've forgotten about. The song "Metro" that regrettably never showed up on a System of a Down album showed up recently, as did, of all things, the fact that I own an Ace of Base CD. Usually my rediscovered finds languish and eventually go back to gathering dust after a few days of novelty, but others can hang around for awhile and even lead to me buying more albums by the artist. This happened with Machine Head and Adema most notably, where an album that bought and them promply found something more immediately interesting came back to actually stick around about a year after I got it in the first place. What does this mean? It means that that Seether CD might get lots of play in...2004... I would like to report that I was only a month off. Thanks to Squizz and my own rapidly randomizing listening tastes lately, I've been listening to Disclaimer a lot. It's playing right now, in fact. The whole thing. Even the songs that I didn't like before. I really dig how heavily grunge it is, for a post grunge album. The track "Sympathetic" still sucks ass, though. And Samantha is crazy. SamiamtheLast December 7, 2003 9:01PM Ok, I want a bit of input from you guys (nix Graeme). I recently accepted a proposition from my boyfriend that we see other people, though we are still together. I think it makes sense. Graeme and many of my other friends, however, think I'm crazy. Am I? ZenZagg December 6, 2003 9:07PM Just a note to the readers...I actually was very much less sane at that specific time in our history :D. Pick a few months in either direction and it would look very different. Looking back at that log brings a chill down my spine because, yes, I actually was doing and saying all that in earnest. Thank God I got away from the people and ideologies that put me in that state :D. Crossed Reality December 6, 2003 8:35PM Feature! It'll probably interest Travis and I more than anything, but you can look at it and see how we once Typed online, what we once talked about, and et cetera. Perhaps you can even see our really bad 90's haircuts! Crossed Reality December 5, 2003 12:04PM So good, in fact, that I just bought Right Now and Did My Time from the iTunes music store. Crossed Reality December 5, 2003 12:00PM Everyone once in awhile, something happens in this world that REALLY isn't FAIR. What happens when you've been making fun of something for years; nay, close to a decade by now. What happens that that THING turns out to be good? You feel empty inside. You feel like dying. You feel that you have somehow been betrayed by the sheer suckiness of the object, which fled in the night to leave you with something all together not horrible. Ladies, and gentlemen, it pains me to say this. Korn's new album does not suck. At all. In fact, some of the songs downright rule. You heard me. Kill me now. Kitty Vertigo December 3, 2003 5:53PM Refresh! The library computers are probably not set to reload the page every visit, so it probably has stored an old page, refreshing should fix it YAY! But you probably already figured that out. Crossed Reality December 3, 2003 4:41PM I'll figure it out when I get to the library. It might be something with the filters we installed. SamiamtheLast December 3, 2003 4:26PM I don't understand. Currently I am checking the site on a library computer; however, since reading Graeme's article last night, both it and Kenny's post seem to have disappeared. Why? I don't understand this universe. I demand a logical explaination! Athena Falconess December 3, 2003 10:40AM Okay, Kenny told me to post something or suffer some unspecified consequences. Anyway, I guess I should give kind of an update on my life since I've been silent for months. Sorry, but a lot of shit has been going on with me as of late. I got my car back from my mom finally so I finally have transportation. Also, I have a boy-friend. So yeah, that's all that's happened to me. Crossed Reality December 3, 2003 9:01AM Elliott has embarked on a mission to update every day this month. Lord only knows if he'll accomplish it, but if he does, that's good news for everyone! It's Christmas! EARLY! Kitty Vertigo December 3, 2003 8:20AM I wrote a feature too! Actually I didn't do much of the writing, cause much of it was recycled material. If you are bored you should read it, because it contains a fun idea that you can do too! I stole the idea from Dan though so bite me. Miaou. Crossed Reality December 2, 2003 5:44PM There's a new feature up. It's about time, right? My typo bug went away for awhile, and now it's back. I honestly thing it's mostly mental. When I'm not thinking about it, it goes away. I don't have any problem when I'm writing a story. Oh well. The sentence "out of control" gave me no end of problems. I retyped it, completely, three times until I finally got it right without a typo on control. However I have typed the word control three times now without a single mistake, although I've made mistakes on other words in the paragraph. Weird, huh? Crossed Reality December 1, 2003 6:57PM I guess you can say that Jux is on another of its temporary breaks, since I'm extremely busy with end-of-semester crap at the moment. Expect a return to semi-regular updates at...some point. Crossed Reality November 30, 2003 1:15PM Man, the holidays really suck for Jux'ing, don't they? Crossed Reality November 28, 2003 1:44AM I suddenly got the weird urge to own a nice writing desk. I think it'll pass. I'm not that pretenious yet, that I need to own a giant shrine to myself. Crossed Reality November 27, 2003 10:55AM Happy Thanksgiving! Juxness should return relatively soon. Crossed Reality November 24, 2003 9:23PM I'm announcing a new Jux Entente contest. It's quite simple. If you email me a response to this newspost, and include in the email a synonym of the word "poindexterous", I will send you one free History Channel JFK bookmark. I guess you'll also need to give me your address. I will be the final judge of whether any entry is, indeed, a synonym. Crossed Reality November 24, 2003 7:20PM Thanks to Travis finding a dearth of material, Detritus is now ahead of schedule. Sorting through his stuff to see what needs to be edited (and THEN used), and editing my stuff, is all that really remains other than writing introductions. Plus, a back cover and spine. We might just do this thing before Christmas. Oh yes, we just might. Crossed Reality November 22, 2003 12:50PM There's a new feature up. It's not much of one, and for that I'm sorry, but it's goign to have to do for now. Until someone invents the 28-hour day. ...that would be totally hat, you know. Crossed Reality November 21, 2003 7:13PM ....*shuffles feet.* SamiamtheLast November 19, 2003 4:55PM I do believe in miracles... understanding women is one of them. ZenZagg November 19, 2003 3:47AM <GEEK> *Drool*... This thing just came out last Tuesday! It's only like $2.31! With such a simple 5-pin package, and the fact that it supports Li-Ion battery packs...I smell high-powered rechargeable waffleboxen. <GEEK/> Crossed Reality November 18, 2003 8:41PM Hello. I am writing a story called Six by Six instead of writing a feature tonight. Instead, I will probably write a feature tomorrow morning. And you will be happy, and not bother me about this, unless I hurt you. Then you can bother me. But, first, you have to tell me the names of every person who died in the Boer War. In alphanumerical order by severity of wound. Kitty Vertigo November 17, 2003 1:43AM Why am I awake? WHY CAN'T I SLEEP! Somebody help me. Crossed Reality November 16, 2003 11:43PM I think I might be writing a third new, never-before-seen story for Detritus. It's one of those ideas that I almost never seem to be able to turn into a good story, though, so I'm not sure if I'm even going to write it, or if it'll be included if I do. If I do, it'll be called Six by Six. In other Detritus news...nothing, really. Everything's totally eventual. (short story collection pun) SamiamtheLast November 16, 2003 11:44AM I've posted a feature. Yes, I HAVE POSTED A FEATURE! I feel so productive. Snaps for me! Crossed Reality November 15, 2003 5:42PM A feature might be coming later tonight, not sure if I'll get around to it or not quite yet honestly, but, until then...look at this! SamiamtheLast November 15, 2003 11:41AM Guess what? This is my first full weekend off since the summer. Actually, I don't think I had a full week off even then. Oh well, I believe I shall celebrate this paramount moment by... writing an essay ahead of time. I really need a life. I think I may post something tonight. We'll see. ZenZagg November 13, 2003 4:57PM Kenny just brought something regarding my recent feature to my attention. Some people might not have eyelids to blink with. For those of you able to read this...but don't have eyelids, I apologize for assuming that you blink like everyone else. For those unfortunate souls, change "HA! You BLINKED!!" to "HA! You BEAT YOUR HEART!!" You can't prove he cheated in that case either ;). On that note, jux policy states zombies are disqualified from receiving alternate comic dialogues. Sorry for the inconvienience. Crossed Reality November 13, 2003 4:19PM Roy has been removed over his rock. This is good. This is sehr gut. However, now I have another problem. They're putting up the ten commandments in the Canton court house. ...I think it's protest time! ZenZagg November 13, 2003 5:09AM Feature up! Scattered smothered chunked covered diced. Don't forget the gravy. Crossed Reality November 12, 2003 10:03PM There's a new Picasso feature up! Kitty Vertigo November 12, 2003 12:40PM Yay! We will be here forever. Mew. Crossed Reality November 11, 2003 9:38PM Probably whenever we post your Wedding Night video, Kenny. Kitty Vertigo November 11, 2003 2:28PM In a fit of boredom I began to visit sites other than this one. Alas, I was distraught to discover that our good friends at the Lair of Chaos are gone. In fact, not only are they gone, but in thier place a new porn site has risen. We don't want any of that linked to from our site so a bit of hastey deletion fixed the problem. I wonder how long it will take before we are replaced with porn. Miaou. Crossed Reality November 10, 2003 11:49AM New feature, posted. Word up. Crossed Reality November 9, 2003 11:16PM Kansas flatter than a pancake. That's funnier than anything I could have written today, anyway! Crossed Reality November 9, 2003 10:37PM Today was very hard and very busy at work, and I'm drained. That would be the reason for no new feature. There should be one in the morning, but I make no promises. I've taken on quite a work load this year...hoy. You'll all benefit in the end, though, if my writing career takes off...although I'm not sure how...me snubbing you and all. Crossed Reality November 8, 2003 12:42PM Work progesses well on Detritus. It's publisher will be listed as none other than "JEP", otherwise known as Jux Entente Press. A logo will be forthcoming, probably based on the generic JE logo that is used for Guest authors, although I might put Hobart on there somewhere. We'll see. It's on track to be done quite soon, from my end. I'm not sure of Zen's progress as of yet. I know he can get a lot of work done really quickly when he buckles down, but I'm not sure how much needs to be done on his side either. We're going to have a meeting on this topic shortly. Page count estimates look to be about 150 pages currently. That's longer than books like Proof and Metamorphosis when printed at 5x8 like we are, so hopefully you won't feel ripped off. Unfortunately, thanks to how small we are, we're not going to be able to undercut costs. The least expensive I imagine the book to be will be somewhere around...$12.00 in prefect bound (paperback), and $9.00 in the discount spiral bound copy. Prices may vary, though. Kitty Vertigo November 7, 2003 5:50PM Mourn. Miaou. Crossed Reality November 7, 2003 12:35PM There's a new feature up. Picasso strip. Again. Crossed Reality November 6, 2003 7:29PM I finished the new story Memories of Autumn today. This puts us right on schedule for Detritus so far, as far as work load goes. Travis has given me a few of his poems and apparently has a story or two in reserve, which is good. I'm debating just how much editing to do on mine, honestly. The cover work starts soon. This has been your Detritus update! I also have a few ideas for new comics, and I might do one tonight. It's kinda weird how I've done so many strips lately...there was a long period of time without that many at all. Italy and immediately after. Crossed Reality November 4, 2003 11:12PM There's a new, quite wonderful, shirt in the store, featuring Hobart, Unnamed Blob, and your ego. Crossed Reality November 4, 2003 1:13PM There's another new feature up, and it's also another new Picasso feature. You've been living the large the last few days, haven't you? Also, I would like to thank the person who shortened the word Memorandum to Memo, which makes a lot more contextual sense when you think about it. Crossed Reality November 3, 2003 11:49PM Oh, there's ANOTHER new feature up. Crossed Reality November 3, 2003 11:06PM I am having the hardest time starting these two stories. I know exactly what I want to write, but I always write a story in order, and I'm having trouble writing an opening. Oh well, I'll get it. Crossed Reality November 3, 2003 8:25PM There's a new feature up! Kitty Vertigo November 2, 2003 11:23PM Who's that pretty girl? It's me! I am so hot! Miaou! Crossed Reality October 31, 2003 12:41PM Happy Halloween everyone! Now, does everyone remember how much pedestrians are worth in Minivan bowling? Crossed Reality October 30, 2003 11:16AM There's a new feature up! Crossed Reality October 29, 2003 9:29PM The end of the world? Probably not, but one of our readers sent that to me, and I think it's pretty damn funny. I also think the guys in the background sound a LOT like Group X. Crossed Reality October 29, 2003 10:59AM Apparently, long-sleeve shirts are now on sale in our store until the end of the month. Now's the time to buy the Kitty Vertigo shirt you always wanted, as well as the brand-new-because-I-just-made-it Picasso long sleeve shirt. Crossed Reality October 29, 2003 9:23AM It's been a busy week. A report due today, and an exam, then a German test tomorrow and a Regent's Test that afternoon...bah, life is busy. Did I mention I held my first conversation in a foreign language ever yesterday? It was in German, and strictly small talk, but it was still neat. It really lets you see that maybe you ARE learning something about this language beyond what you thought you knew. Feature tonight? Maybe. Crossed Reality October 27, 2003 7:13PM There's a new feature up, the sequel to the first Parables feature I did last September. Remember that one? It was funny, I swear. Also, for a second there I was afraid that actually was called Totally Hat! Then I realized it was totally BBQ, and the hat was just...there. Thus, we're still safe. Nothing is Totally Hat! Yet. ZenZagg October 27, 2003 6:11PM I was in the supermarket the other day and suddenly recognized something on one of the bottles on the shelf. Apparently Best Foods/Hellmann's marketing division realizes just how appealing the Totally Hat! name is to American consumers. If only we had thought of releasing a Totally Hat! BBQ sauce first, we'd have made a killing. Really, we would have. DISCLAIMER: The Jux Entente is not related to or endorsed by Best Foods or Hellmann's, but we hope they enjoy free publicity. Kitty Vertigo October 27, 2003 5:50PM Animal Crossed Reality is unforgivable. That game was lame. At least until i discovered the super free money Turnip Trading cheat. My house was full of 10,000 sacks... until my little sister deleted it. It made me want to cry... they were only jealous of my gold statue. Mew. Crossed Reality October 26, 2003 6:25PM God forgive me...I'm playing Animal Crossing again. ZenZagg October 26, 2003 2:16PM *sobs* I had half of the comic done...and I went to save it, and Photoshop just decided to play hide-and-go-crash. It just closed, no error, no warning. I now have to practically start over. !!@$^$%*@*#@!#!$ Crossed Reality October 25, 2003 1:51PM Partial story list for Detritus: And I Feel Fine Best Wishes (Pending approval) Employment Everyone Does (Not re-edited) Fade Inside Memoria Trick As well as the tentatively titled: All the Angels Remnants Both of which I'm working on, and would be brand new. And there you go. Travis's poem and story inclusions upcoming. Crossed Reality October 25, 2003 11:59AM There's a new Picasso feature up. I'd say something about it, but then that might lessen the effect of actually reading it. Plus I hate talking things up too much...*cough* Anyway, yeppers. What else to say? Oh, Samantha...you do realize that more than one person on this site got an 800 on their verbal SAT, right? :-D SamiamtheLast October 25, 2003 10:51AM One of my best friends just made and 800 verbal on her SAT. I feel so inferior. Oh well, at least I can say I beat her in math, even if it is only by ten points. Oh God, I AM inferior. Oh, and Graeme, you know I support you in all your literary endeavors. Be off my friend, and realize your dreams! I love being cheesy at times. ZenZagg October 23, 2003 2:40PM This is not the end, it is just the beginning! :D Crossed Reality October 23, 2003 1:31PM Feature up! Crossed Reality October 23, 2003 11:33AM Slapped by the glove of your image, I will indeed reply! ZenZagg October 23, 2003 5:35AM Crossed Reality October 22, 2003 3:43PM A brief moment of seriousness here, my people. I have recently decided to half-venture into the realm of self publishing. No, I am not talking about my novel; when I finish the third draft of THAT, I will start shopping it around elsewhere. What I'm talking about is a sort of compilation of short stories, to see if there's any demand out there in the web...and around here...for me. Maybe it could get me noticed, who knows...I doubt it though. I've also thought of doing it as a Jux Entente book, and asking Travis to perhaps contribute some poetry, whatever. Some of the stories I would add a bit of spit-shine too. Others, I can think of at least one in particular, I would double check for any typos and then let it be. Those have already been published at least once. I even know what I'd call it. Elliott always hated my idea of calling my short story collection The Persistence of Loss, and someone has already taken Minor Works, so I've decided on Detritus. This is not destined to be one of the great literary compendums of history. This is just meant to be a way for me to put something out there, and to give these stories a bit of a chance to breathe...whether they deserve it or not. In addition to all the stuff that people have been reading for years, there would be at least one new story, and perhaps a few Jux features would find themselves reborn. If I can swing it, and I'm not sure how I'm going to do this since I have two very good options, I might even publish it as Jux Entente Press. But I'll need your support. This will go up in our store, one way or another, and it will be the only for-profit item in there. I won't make much, but I will make a little. I need to know if any of you out there, and those just around here, will support my writing. This means everyone reading this, from Travis and Kenny down to the random people I don't even know. You've seen samples of some of my stories on the site, and some (well, at least one) that puts any of those to shame will appear in this set. There's a good chance that the effort I expect to put into this will stifle the Halloween story, and maybe even normal feature production. But it's something I need to do. And even if it fails, I'm going ahead with my novel. Crossed Reality October 22, 2003 2:09AM Good poetry lives in its language; bad poetry lives in English and Latin. ZenZagg October 21, 2003 4:30PM That reminds me, I was reading Medea in class today, and it made me wonder how many great poems' true passions are dimished by translation (unless its rather clever) because rhyme and meter are lost when you put it in a new language. Good poetry lives in its language, and I'm somewhat sad I'm not multi-lingual so I can appriciate the wordplay in poetry written in its native language. Crossed Reality October 21, 2003 4:06PM Cen war ein Zensor-Sensor Senser -- das heißt, fragte er Sensoren ab, die Zensoren abfragten. Die zentralen Energien schälten aus Shillings für Cen, das die Sensoren abfragte und sie still auseinanderbaute. Die Stadtmenschen waren incensed an diesem senseless Mißbrauch des Privatlebens, denn sicher sollte jeder in der LageSEIN, Zensoren, es abzufragen ist konstitutionell! ZenZagg October 21, 2003 12:14PM There's a new feature up that I'm sure you'll agree is saturated with consonance--or maybe consonants. In any such case, slide over to the features page, and consume it with your sight! Kitty Vertigo October 20, 2003 9:04PM Sometimes I hate everything. Oh and Graeme... double posts are so last week. This week its short posts that are "in". Meow. SamiamtheLast October 20, 2003 6:13PM Anxiety attacks suck. That's all there is to it. Crossed Reality October 19, 2003 3:58PM Double posts are high in dietary fiber! Crossed Reality October 19, 2003 3:57PM There is a new feature up, right next to Jimmy cracking corn. Crossed Reality October 19, 2003 3:53PM There's a new feature up. Enjoy! Crossed Reality October 18, 2003 9:51PM I've been in a bad mood all day because my tongue has a cut in it, rendering me mute for a few days, and my car gained another scratch of impossible origin. This one is very light and almost unnoticeable, but it's still annoying. Even if I can buff it out. Because I don't know where it came from. I need to put cameras on this thing and show up at people's houses with baseball bats. This shit NEVER happened to my old car. Also, I invented a new Graeme quote today: "Never confuse admissions of one's shallowness for depth." Crossed Reality October 16, 2003 6:19PM There's a new feature up. It's sure to scour your retinas with hateful, hateful peroxide bleach! ZenZagg October 16, 2003 12:26AM Mine wasn't a retelling of any joke, it was REAL. This is why you must fear when life imitates humorous parody. Crossed Reality October 15, 2003 5:56PM Halloween story? Maybe. I know I promised one, but I seem to be having trouble coming up with an idea Id on't get sick of in a fwe minutes time. I'd LIKE to do one, but, well, I just thought I'd warn you that the prospects are getting slimmer, unfortunately. Then again, I wrote Trick in less than a day, so it's still likely that I'll get a great idea and run with it like last year. I do have a FEW ideas I've not completely eschewed yet. Honestly, I seem to be taking one of my writing breaks lately. I tend to do those from time to time. I need to start and finish the third draft of my novel, so I can submit it, even though my spirits are a bit down by the excuses some people have come up with to not have to read the second draft...oh well. Those that did read it, love it. The rest of them can burn in Hell. Well, that's enough for me at the moment. I would like to congratulate Travis on his wonderful retelling of a joke I did over a year ago, though ;) ZenZagg October 15, 2003 4:15PM Too small to release as a feature, so I give you... GREAT MOMENTS IN INTERNET IRONY(TM)(SM)(R)(C)*! Somewhere, lurking on a forum board or chat network near you, they lie in wait--ready to spring at a moment's provocation! [elfgurl]: i thought that was funny, you,re taking the comics WAY 2 seiously, i luv LOTR its a great movie and awsome book! [ posted on 2003-09-22 ] [ report inappropriate comment ] [elfgurl]: opps forgot the r in seriously [ posted on 2003-09-22 ] [ report inappropriate comment ] ... Be afraid, be very, very afraid. * GMIII should only be used as indicated, is not for human consumption and should not be used by toddlers under the age of 21. SamiamtheLast October 14, 2003 8:29PM Ok, I have decided I want to get married in October. It's so nice out right now. I forgot how much I'd missed it. Oh, and I hate computers, but love the feature, Graeme. Crossed Reality October 14, 2003 11:24AM Kenny is da man! And I was just scared as hell by a headline because of him, because it said Five children, 2 adults killed in Pennsylvania house fire, and minus the three that are away, that's the perfect number of children AND adults. It was horrifying. Luckily, it wasn't his family! Anyways, even though our hottest member has no parking stories...he has some mighty fine walking ones, right Kenny? As well, Georgia is so very pretty right now. I love fall. I want a place of eternal fall. Kitty Vertigo October 14, 2003 2:51AM Guess what? The time is almost 3:00. You know what that means! I can't sleep. Again. And the time on the news post is correct. How much do you love me? Does this make up for not having any interesting parking stories? Find out next week, on... oh wait... wrong show. Mew. Athena Falconess October 14, 2003 2:10AM It's weird that the parking thing has been brought up today because Cydney (my cousin) and I were just talking about how bad people park in the parking decks. Have you ever noticed that when there are straight lines, people park diagonally, but when the parking is actually supposed to be diagonal, they have a hard time? I just don't get what's so hard about the concept of parking between two lines, I'm, admittly, a horrible driver and even I don't have trouble with this. It's not that fucking hard! ZenZagg October 14, 2003 1:35AM Speaking of forced bad parking... I was vacationing in Florida this summer with Sara's family, and this SUV parked a bit diagonal across some spaces, so I had to park diagonal too. The bad thing is, when I got back, he was gone; the management left a nice 8 1/2" x 11" note chastising ME for parking badly. It was a warning of sorts, the consequences of which I dare not learn. Insult to injury. :D Crossed Reality October 14, 2003 1:24AM There are two new features up by me, and they are related to one another. Check them out. This WILL be a series, I assure you. Also, I seem to be having trouble typing lately. I've been making a crazy amount of typos. I don't know if it's just the lack of time I've been spending on computers or what. My hands feel awkward, though, sometimes. If I make them act normal, they spell things weird. Maybe it's just a phase, I don't know. I can still type faster than most people without making any errors. Maybe I'm making it worse by worrying about something that's really nothing. Anyway, enjoy the bad parking chronicles. Assuming I'm not assassinated, and people don't learn...there's nothing to stop me from making more! Crossed Reality October 11, 2003 9:09PM There's a new feature up. It's a Picasso feature, and it's a REAL Picasso feature, not at all like Picasso Pad 2, which was posted a few days ago ;) Crossed Reality October 11, 2003 6:01PM My hair is chopped off. Alas. Actually, it looks weird, but kinda good. I got it cut shorter than I really wanted it because my hair grows so damn fast it'll be the length I want in no time, anyway, and this way I won't have to go get it cut again anytime soon. It's also not highlighted yet, and I'm getting it done so it's nearly blonde. I'll take pictures once that's done ;) It's just below my chin now, so...think about that. Crossed Reality October 9, 2003 9:00PM There's a new feature up that will be quite surprising to those of you who know me... Don't hurt me! Crossed Reality October 9, 2003 6:11PM Time has come today... Athena Falconess October 8, 2003 5:41PM Speaking of mothers, today's my mom's birthday. I haven't spoken to her since I moved out/got kicked out and she didn't call me on my b-day, therefore, I'm debating on whether to call her on hers. I'd like to think I'm the bigger person and call her, but calling her would also involve getting bitched at, told what a horrible child I am and what little emotional stability I have will go right out the window. So yeah, still thinking about it.... Crossed Reality October 8, 2003 1:07PM New feature up. Also, Napster is funny. Crossed Reality October 8, 2003 4:10AM Arnold won. Hell, even if he fucks up, this should be interesting to watch, no? I would have voted for him! Crossed Reality October 7, 2003 2:26PM Why has no one cut Jeff Rowland a deal to make Magical Adventures in Space an honest-to-goodness cartoon show? That's all the world needs. I'd watch it FIVE TIMES A DAY. Even if it was only ten minutes long after commercials. Don't know what the hell I'm talking about? You're a heathen, first of all...and, secondly: WIGU Crossed Reality October 6, 2003 11:49AM There's a new feature up! About sports! I also feel the need to tell you that coming up on October 31st, if all goes according to plan, will be the second annual Jux Halloween Story! It's a totally new tale I have in mind, about ghosts. I think it might be quite a bit longer, too, so I probably need to get started, since I also expect to give you a revised version, possibly with a tweaked ending, of last year's masterpiece, Trick. Crossed Reality October 3, 2003 6:57PM Whoops, there's a feature up. What do you know? Crossed Reality October 3, 2003 4:29PM Way to be a downer, Kenny! Yeah, I've been abnormally busy again (hey, we were REALLY good with features in September, so get those eyes off the floor.) There might not be one tonight...but there will be tomorrow. I'm sure. I think. ;) Kitty Vertigo October 3, 2003 3:55AM Thus far you have always had a feature by, or on, the 4th of the month. I'm going to guess that someone will post a feature tomorrow. If not, we have no prior knowledge of what might happen, excluding April 2002, cause we didn't exist at the beginning of that month. My guess would be that if you don't get a feature by, or on, the 4th then you will not get one the entire month. Have a nice october! I wonder how the feature poster would react to not having a feature in a month. Maybe we will find out. Miaou Crossed Reality September 29, 2003 5:03PM What day is this, anyway? Damn girlfriend, movies, Final Fantasy Tactics Advance time sucking...wait, I was in the middle of a mission! Kitty Vertigo September 27, 2003 4:25PM I hate waking up. Meow Crossed Reality September 26, 2003 8:00PM There's a new (Picasso) feature up! Crossed Reality September 26, 2003 3:47PM I just spent an hour washing my car. And I wasn't bored. In the olden days, I used to say I'd never get as anal about cleaning my car as my father was. I'm still not quite there. I don't have thousands of different snake oil waxes that don't work, and I sure as hell don't bother to towel-dry my car (it gets my wonderfully clean surface all linty), but I have come around to doing things in much more precise detail. This is what buying a new car does to you. Celes Zwei deserves all of my time and attention. And yes, Laurie, you do exist. I've been thinking of fun things I could do with that, actually... Athena Falconess September 26, 2003 4:17AM Hey, I exist damn it, I've just been...er...busy. With what, you ask? Um...can't tell you that... Crossed Reality September 25, 2003 2:54AM Wow. Today has been a busy day. Travis goes bald, Sam writes a feature, and everyone but Kenny says something about my controversial new classification system! SamiamtheLast September 25, 2003 1:15AM New feature by yours truly. I think I may do a representation of the Roman triumverate sometime soon. That'd be better balanced. Graeme gets all the fame and glory. SamiamtheLast September 25, 2003 12:12AM Ok, I don't think I could possibly be the "Other Oute One." I'm too womanly to be the "Other Cute One." Breasts do not equal cute. I'd like to think of myself as... "Attractive." At least that's what I'd like to think. ZenZagg September 25, 2003 12:08AM This one does me a little better justice. While there is balding all around me in my family, I am not balding yet, Graeme. However, I can't say it would be a bad thing now ;). Athena Falconess September 24, 2003 11:34PM For the record, I still exist...in a sense anyway... Crossed Reality September 24, 2003 10:28PM Fe-ah-chur! Crossed Reality September 24, 2003 6:22PM Who the hell hired Billy Howerdel without telling me? ZenZagg September 24, 2003 5:35PM (:-D Crossed Reality September 24, 2003 4:28PM DEAR GOD NO! Crossed Reality September 24, 2003 2:30AM Feature, by the way, j0. Meow, or something. Crossed Reality September 23, 2003 11:47PM Happy birthday to Sam! Kitty Vertigo September 22, 2003 12:20PM I'm very frightened. Miaou, hide me! Crossed Reality September 22, 2003 11:39AM There's a new feature up. I'm proud to say that I do think this will be the final in our series of "Damn! Kenny is hot!" saga. If not, I don't care, since my car is the shop and I have to drive a Bravada...otherwise known as an old Blazer. Kitty Vertigo September 21, 2003 5:33AM I made a new feature which consists of a hilarious true story and a shameless plug for the site of some friends. Go read it already? Miaou! Crossed Reality September 20, 2003 3:17PM Yeah, but we've SEEN you...and the long hair is new, surprising, and disturbingly alluring. Zen was "The Other One", by the way ;) Kitty Vertigo September 20, 2003 2:39PM Well first off, have any of you actually seen me in more than 4-5 years? Didn't think so! And this is in no way an attempt to steal Graeme's "The Hot One" title. I am perfectly happy being "The Cute One". I forget what Zen's title was. And I guess Laurie can't really be "The Girl" anymore since Sam joined. I spose we can get this all straightened out later. I'm going to go brunch on something. Perhaps the will serve some Shuttlecocks. Wow that was funny. Meow. ZenZagg September 20, 2003 4:10AM Yes Kenny, just when did you turn hot? I mean, yes there were jokes and such before, but, geeze man. You're showing us all up and you're not even *trying*. :D And did you age like 5 years suddenly as well? What have they done to you!? Crossed Reality September 20, 2003 2:49AM *looks at more* Damn Kenny, you're hot...when the hell did you turn hot? Why didn't you tell us? Why were you keeping us in the dark? You can get us into all the cool parties where they won't take Travis because of his gimp eye, and me because my hair is scary! Crossed Reality September 20, 2003 2:46AM Wow Kenny, why didn't you tell me you were growing awesome hair too? Some of those are photo-gallery worthy, but I'm not going to steal them ;) Kitty Vertigo September 19, 2003 4:42PM So I have this friend. She is named April! You all remember her as drawing the picture of me that can be found on shirts and stuff in the store. Anyways, she is in this photography class and has taken many awesome pictures of me (and a few extrememely uncomplimentary pictures). They are totally worth looking at here. I am in the "Portrait of a Friend" and "Crazy Fun" galleries. Take a look at all of her photos though, she is talented. Meow! Crossed Reality September 19, 2003 3:02PM Everyone remember to wear black on Sunday, in memory of the ship Galileo... Nah, I'm just foolin`. Kitty Vertigo September 19, 2003 3:12AM It is hurricaining out. If i had a video camera I'd give you a cool video of me pretending i'm being blown away by a hurricane, but I don't and i have a bunch of work to do for tomorrow so I'm gonna do that instead. Hurricaines blow! Crossed Reality September 18, 2003 8:32PM There's a new feature up! Yaaaaay! Also, I bought one of the new Care Bears today. Unless you get a GIANT one, they PALE in comparison to the older bears...too bad I got a little one...oh well. SamiamtheLast September 16, 2003 10:09PM Kenny, guess what? I'm four of the five on your good people list, though I care more about order than neatness. You must be way off. Kitty Vertigo September 16, 2003 12:18PM HAHA. I am stupid. That was supposed to be a feature. Sucks for you. This is what happens when I wake up at 8:00 for class and then it gets cancelled. Meow. Kitty Vertigo September 16, 2003 12:16PM This post was edited to contain a link to my feature instead of the feature itself. Feature. SamiamtheLast September 16, 2003 12:08AM OK, no post tonight. I may get one up tomorrow though. We'll see. Kitty Vertigo September 15, 2003 10:42PM Wow! It actually worked. I was seriously expecting some catastrophic accident that would destroy the entire site. We'll just have to see how the feature poster holds up. Meow! SamiamtheLast September 15, 2003 8:35PM Hmmmm... so this is what it's like. I'll try to post something tonight. Maybe I'll post my application essay as a feature. That'd be neat, right? ...I'm such a dork. Crossed Reality September 15, 2003 8:25PM There's a new feature up, and the new Members page should be up in just a second. I'll try to get the new writer to post something to go along with it, introducing herself. Crossed Reality September 15, 2003 11:26AM I'm still very, very angry, and thus in an un-funny mood. Brand new car, you know. Had it for two weeks, you know. Have to take it to a body shop now, you know. Imagine my anger. Feel my fury. It's really not that bad and hardly noticeable, but, I mean...grah. Just grah. Will you get a feature tonight? I damn well hope so, as well as posting a new Members page complete with a bio of a new staff member for the site. Crossed Reality September 14, 2003 1:10AM Sorry, my new car was subject to a hit and run to the back driver's side fender earlier today. It was my girlfriend's mother. I have witnesses. She's going to jail for criminal trespass and hit and run, as soon as the detectives get the rest of the info tomorrow, I'm sure. My car will be fine, since it's only the fender, and it's really not that bad...but they'll probably have to replace it. Luckily, it's a new car, so the paint won't be hard to match...at all...and if it is, they have to keep doing it until it does! Crossed Reality September 13, 2003 4:05PM MURDER Crossed Reality September 11, 2003 8:32PM There's a new feature up, j0. Hey Dasty, are we doing better? ;) Crossed Reality September 11, 2003 5:39PM I'm going to try to write our 9/11 feature from work, so if you're wondering if I forgot, I did not. Have more faith. Bitch. Anyway, given that this week has seen me turn from "Level 3 RIAA crusader" to "Level 4 RIAA mid-boss", I feel another link is in order! Someone's suing THEM! HAH! Crossed Reality September 10, 2003 4:46PM Last year, as some of you probably remember, we shut down the site for the entirety of September 11th as a sort of memorial. This year, we will not be doing the same. I have many reasons for doing this, mostly just that it doesn't fit the theme of this site at all. Jux has done its bit towards the memory. This time, we'll just try to make you laugh, okay? Lord if I know how though. Maybe finger puppets. Crossed Reality September 10, 2003 12:11PM There's a new feature up! And let's recap the interesting things that have happened during the last few days, shall we? 1) The RIAA is uber stupid. 2) My vegetarian girlfriend has become a carnivore again, thanks to plenty of nice negative reinforcement! YAY! As well, there's the biggest format-change to a Jux page in a long time when the new Members page I've been working on debuts either late today or tomorrow. The only reason this is a big deal, since I realize most of you go to the Members page once or twice...if at all...in your entire site-reading lifespan, is that it reveals a slight organizational change to the site, as well as the announcement of something new altogether. Whenever we do the server move, I think it's safe to say you'll be able to expect a few more slight visual tweaks to the site as well. It's going to be a nice, long time before I ever do a full redesign again, though (something that hasn't happened since mid 2002). The site has grown so much since then that, quite frankly, it would be several days worth of work that I'm not sure I have. That's why those damn webcomics are so lucky...their fucking content is images! Bah! Crossed Reality September 10, 2003 11:10AM Holy Shiva on a stick! Have you looked at ign.com? There's advertising, and then there's...Jesus....how does a shitty website get that poor? McDonald's IGN Playland! Crossed Reality September 10, 2003 12:17AM Lawsuit against a 12 year old? Yeah, because you're such a wholesome industry. That's it. The RIAA has lost as much of my business as I can afford to have them lose. They're driving me to filesharing, because I don't want to support anything this fucking stupid, evil, and out of date. Jesus christ. Evolve or die. Oh, and learn copyright law. I hope someone brings up the Audio Home Recording Act again this time, because, guess what? File sharing is legal! Kitty Vertigo September 9, 2003 11:09AM Today is my birthday! Go me! CAKE! Crossed Reality September 8, 2003 12:17PM Oh, there's a feature up. Crossed Reality September 8, 2003 11:02AM I beat that game yesterday, in case you were curious. Man, it's now one of my all time favourites, and I'm not just saying that...that's the scariest damn thing ever, and that makes it fun. I'm playing through again with some of the secret weapons, getting revenge on things. It's great. I hate dreams. I had a fucked up one last night. I don't believe they mean anything, but I hate them anyway. My brain's unconcious random firings seem to do nothing but frustrate me. Why can't I dream about monsters and demons and stuff like normal people? There's some behind-the-scenes Jux stuff going on. Exciting times coming... Crossed Reality September 7, 2003 4:37AM Silent Hill 3 continues to amaze me with its ability to scare me silly. Just thought you could use the update. Crossed Reality September 6, 2003 8:58PM Sometimes, you just wish you could escape yourself. Why do you drag yourself down when you have everything? Why do you long for the past...the past is shit. You even revel in the past lives of others sometimes. You've made a living out of it. Why do you listen to those songs? Why do you think those thoughts? Why does some part of you seek self destruction? You don't want to die, you just don't want to live. You wish you could go back in time and freeze it. You're always happier in the past, aren't you? Always greener...always safer. The only way out you find is anger. You long for violence. You resist until it passes, and it keeps coming...slower and slower...maybe one day, with enough help, it will stop. But if it doesn't...how many times can you stand it? Crossed Reality September 6, 2003 4:51PM There's a new feature up. It's much longer than that Picasso strip I did, and based on something random I said a few days ago. Those always make great features, don't they? ...don't they? Crossed Reality September 6, 2003 2:19AM Think you're completely jaded? Think you can take ANYTHING? Play Silent Hill 3, my friend. I thought the benchmark set by the first game would never be beaten, but I have been terrified tonight, and I wasn't even playing alone! By the time you get to the town in Silent Hill 3, it makes all other horror videogames (I've played and own a shit ton), horror movies (same as above, although there are already more good horror games than horror movies), and horror stories (always tough) look like something you'd see hosted by Lizzie McQuire. Seriously. If you don't believe me, I can give you direction to a door in a little place named Brookhaven that'll make you repent. Crossed Reality September 5, 2003 1:29PM You know I'm bad, I'm bad, you know it... (really really bad) (...really) Yeah, I've been listening to Michael Jackson tunes for the last day or so. Crossed Reality September 4, 2003 4:52PM Feature, Picasso style, is now online! Crossed Reality September 4, 2003 12:16AM Remember my Britney Spears rant from a few days ago? There's the answer! Crossed Reality September 3, 2003 11:59AM There's a new feature up. Maybe it will restore some faith in people who seem to think that Jux isn't being funny anymore, but has rather become some sort of ranting point. Well...blah. As for Picasso making a return, it will be soon, I imagine. I simply haven't had the time to do so lately. Honestly, it's times like these that make me glad Jux never committed to a set update schedule. No one can bitch about us for not posting features regularly lately, because we never said we would! Hah! Although I do hope to start again, soon. Maybe. There's still a server move I want to do, as well, you know. Crossed Reality September 2, 2003 12:27AM No, Jux is not dead...just busy! I'm trying to think of a few new ventures for the site, among other things. Features will continue, shortly. The point of this site is just to be fun for us, but at the same time, I don't want to keep doing the same sort of thing over and over...it might get stale, for you, and us. If this was a webcomic I would introduce a new character or change to colour or something. As it is, I think a band is in order! But my life is finally settling back down, from car purchases and lightning strikes and everything else, so let's hope it stays that way, so I can get back to being bored enough to write Jux features. For your sake, I mean. Crossed Reality August 29, 2003 9:08PM Do you know how many copies of "Sex...Volume 2!" Madonna would sell if she tossed Britney Spears in it? Seriously, though, I'd love to see how miss pop diva is going to pass THIS one off as anything innocent. Crossed Reality August 29, 2003 7:19PM Yes! YES! OH YES KENNY YES! Kitty Vertigo August 29, 2003 7:02PM Hi everyone. I just moved into my new apartment! Also, classes start soon. This means I will probably be spending many nights in the labs, which means you will be getting more from me. Aren't you happy? Yes? Yes? Yes? Yes? Oh. Crossed Reality August 29, 2003 5:53PM Sorry for the Jux Silence. There's been a lot going on the past few days. Insurance problems from the accident I was in last week, plus, yesterday, I bought a new car! I pick it up tomorrow at 11:00. It's a 2004 Pontiac Grand Prix GT2 (with options out the yin-yang) that I've dubbed "Celes Zwei", as opposed to the original code-name of Lulu for my Celes replacement. Pictures will be up shortly, I assure you. Tomorrow is also my birthday party! Whooooooo! With that out of the way, I should have a feature up for you in about half an hour or so. Look for it, since I won't be doing another news post ;) Crossed Reality August 26, 2003 1:24PM Happy day of uteral expulsion to me! Crossed Reality August 26, 2003 12:39AM There's a new feature up. And while I'm at it, I thought I'd show you this picture of the kick-ass rock garden I have on my desk. Vivian gave me the basic components (rocks), I added the aliens and ninja to make my own statement about the oppression of purple pj's. Crossed Reality August 25, 2003 12:22PM Who are you and how did you do that? I DEMAND ANSWERS! ...AND PICKLES! Athena Falconess August 25, 2003 2:47AM Okay, I mentioned the newsposter time being off by 2 hours like forever ago. How come everyone is just now getting around to noticing? Crossed Reality August 24, 2003 8:25PM Dear Kenny, Why is the newposter's time off by two hours? Crossed Reality August 24, 2003 5:09AM I just had one of the strangest and most rewarding experiences of my life. I just got to reveal to a Nirvana fan...new Nirvana! I've gathered all the studio-recorded misc tracks (not You Know You're Right) over the years, and while Vivian had heard Verse, Chorus, Verse, she'd never even heard OF I Hate Myself And I Want To Die. I played it, and Marigold, for her. She was creeped out, but in a good way. It was new Nirvana. It was new, GOOD Nirvana. What a gift to be able to give someone. There will be precious few New Nirvana chances, ever again... Crossed Reality August 22, 2003 10:34PM First, you have a new feature. Second, this has been the worst day ever. I'm not going to get into EVERYTHING, but at one point I was t-boned (actually, it was the rear of my car) by some jerk-off bitch on my road going 60 over a hill, who didn't have a license, or insurance, and didn't speak English. My car is fine, just some scratches, not even a dent. Hers was not happy. She also got a free ride to prison by the nice police officer! Crossed Reality August 21, 2003 7:22PM Why are any of us under the mistaken impression that the readers of Jux care about this parking mess? :D I'm going to try to get a feature to you tonight, my children. And I'm also going to start planning for Da Grande Moving. Server time baby, break it down! Unf! Crossed Reality August 21, 2003 7:21PM I've managed to get an H-lot spot, my stomping grounds, every day but the first one. Usually a GOOD H-lot spot. And now that they've fully opened up the East-lot, it's not down as much as it was the first day...but who wants to cross the damn highway after parking? I've never even been in the East Deck. Is it deckish, or more of a garage-ish flavour? ZenZagg August 21, 2003 5:32PM Re: parking again The east deck has now become a "vulture lot" just like lot C. I actually had better luck with lot C because when "feeding frenzy" begins you are more likely to find an end-of-day student who is leaving. It still took about 50 minutes or more to find a parking spot. Hah...I remember when I would only circle the first row because it was the best row, but those days are over. I circle the third level of the parking deck as fervently as I did the first row of lot C, and it truly is desperation out there. Students are up 16% to 18,000 here, and they have dirt mountains and half finished lots to accomodate the extra population. What happened? They actually destroyed existing lots! Anyway, omelettes can no longer make up for this insanity. Graeme says its worse on MW days, I cannot even imagine how bad it gets during that time. So far I've managed to wrangle a lot C space during the last two class days, at the expense of my first class... Maybe I should start leaving 2 1/2 hours early like some I know are doing. Ugh. :) Crossed Reality August 20, 2003 12:05AM There's a new feature up. I HAD to do it...and there might be more! I have enough questions to choke a horse! Kitty Vertigo August 19, 2003 8:41PM Parking was horrible today... in front of my house. My sisters car was taking up part of the road. This is just to make fun of everyone else at Jux cause my classes don't start for another week and a half so I can still stay up all night playing America's Army and Mario Golf until then. So once again, HAHA. Meow. Crossed Reality August 19, 2003 1:28PM Parking was BETTER today, but still hell. And I forgot Laurie had joined the ranks of the KSU crew...I shall have to drop by and flirt with her so Travis and I can play free pool, or something...awesome man, awesome... ZenZagg August 19, 2003 12:47PM Well, KSU does indeed have insane parking lot/deck issues as foretold to me by Sara and Graeme... However, this ham, cheese, and onion omelette I got from the cafeteria this morning more than makes up for it. Maybe I am too easily satisfied ;) ZenZagg August 19, 2003 12:47PM Well, KSU does indeed have insane parking lot/deck issues as foretold to me by Sara and Graeme... However, this ham, cheese, and onion omelette I got from the cafeteria this morning more than makes up for it. Maybe I am too easily satisfied ;) Athena Falconess August 19, 2003 3:48AM Well, today was the day of my first job as game room attendant at KSU. Well, it was brutal. A lot more so then I expected. See, no one told me that today was going to be Free Game Day until I got there. Needless to say, we were packed all day until my shift was over. From what I understand, it calmed down after I left, go figure. Plus, I almost thought I was going to be fired on my first day because a set of pool balls wound up missing while I was on my lunch break. Not fun. My supervisor found them, but it served to scare the hell out of me for a good few hours. I basically sat in the corner going, "Bad first day, bad first day." Plus, I didn't know I could get tired of being hit on. Well, I reached my limit. I was definitely glad when the day was over. I had to drive around just to cool off. I hope my subsequent days go better. Crossed Reality August 18, 2003 8:39PM The internet worm that heals. That's such a great idea! I'm so glad I had it years ago! Seriously, the Gettok mIRC scripting clan, which I was a part of, wrote a worm/virus way back in 1999 that propigated itself by infecting other mIRC script files, and deleted a know malicious script from your harddrive, wherever it may be. We also had a "shield" script which blocked the worm from working, although the actual author of the thing, danielson, infected himself more than once testing the worm...we also made a variant whose sole purpose was to destroy the scripts of a very irritating person in the #peace&protection channel on Undernet. I guess we weren't all good. But he was very, very annoying, I assure you. Crossed Reality August 17, 2003 4:55PM There's a new feature up, by me! I'm trying to get back in the swing of writing for Jux. It'll take a little while longer, since I'm still morbidly busy with everything from repairing my computer (almost done, just insuring data integrity from the lightning-abused harddrive now), reading all my back mail (a week back, and still not caught up, damn you Vivian), getting back to school (*sigh*), and such. What can I say? It's a busy time. But I'm trying here. On a lighter note, coming up on the weekend of the 30th (which is the day I have in mind, but I'm not sure) is my bi-annual birthday party! Who knows what we'll be doing this time? Not me! Crossed Reality August 15, 2003 10:41AM Awww, that's so sweet. It really cares. Sheba is your computer's sister, you know. FitzSheba is up and running now. 512mb of dual-channel 333mhz DDR RAM, an Athlon XP 2700+, a new 80gig Western Digital Special Edition harddrive to go with my old 60 gig, and a new Radeon 9600, just about to be put in a case. Also, a new NEC LCD monitor, to replace the CRT that got fried to a crisp by the lightning. Sheba is alive. Last but not least, happy birth to Travis, Laurie and Graeme, the three August birthdays of the Jux Entente. I got you all booze! Okay, maybe just Travis. ZenZagg August 15, 2003 3:25AM You know Graeme, I think my computer was just having sympathy pains or something. Sara suggested I reboot in VGA mode and reinstall my video drivers, and what do you know that's what the problem was. Weird though, because it actually was having physical video connection problems...until now. What a weird series of events, my downtime seems to have mirrored yours :D. Crossed Reality August 14, 2003 11:04AM Well, it looks like Sheba's med kit will be here today. This means that FitzSheba will soon be born! Kitty Vertigo August 14, 2003 1:10AM I am so addicted to Mario Golf. At first I was thinking, "That is such a lame idea for a game. No one will want to play that." Then I saw my younger siblings playing it and decided to give it a try. Now I cannot stop! Be warned, it is an addicting game! Must... go... play... Meow. Athena Falconess August 13, 2003 2:02AM I'm 20! *hums "Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me"* Crossed Reality August 12, 2003 1:43PM There's a bit of bad news in Jux land. Sheba, as a whole, is dying. Her internals will slowly fail, it has been determined. Thus, she must be replaced. I have insurance, luckily, but until then I run off my laptop, as I have been doing for some time now. At least at home I have an internet connection when I do it. In other news, it's going to be at least another week before I return to my old update schedule. The hassles of home insurance, going back to school, settling back into life in the United States, and hundreds of other things are going to occupy me for awhile. I will be posting the third edition of my travel journal shortly, and a brief follow up feature will follow that. And then, back to the funny! Not to mention that, if you remember correctly, Jux will be switching hosts. There's exciting things to come, if you can fight through the stressful times now. ZenZagg August 12, 2003 1:30PM Coincidentally my monitor is on the fritz as well, and I think it has something to do with that pesky cable. No more computer until I fix it. Ususally the screen periodically turns pink-hued, or very rarely (once a year maybe) cuts off completely like it is doing now, and then bogglingly fixes itself. I'll do some tests to see if its the card, the cable, or the CRT. Why do they make cables non-detachable on monitors now? :( Crossed Reality August 11, 2003 11:50AM I'm home! Lots of stuff to catch up on first, though...so just wait for me to fix everything around here, and I'll be updating and such again. My house was hit by lightning while I was gone, and while everything important is fine, I'm going to have to replace my computer monitor and possibly a few other things. My phone is fried...oh well. Athena Falconess August 9, 2003 5:08PM Important: AthenaFalconess@aol.com is no more. While that will probably still be my screen name on AIM, email can no longer be sent to me there. From now on, all my email needs to be sent to MutantAthena@aol.com. Thank you. Crossed Reality August 9, 2003 2:54PM Mama, I'm coming home... Crossed Reality August 5, 2003 3:05PM There's not a single mental disorder that can't be solved by pasta, prostitutes, booze, Sara, and the Greek language! I miss being able to be wacky online, sorry Travis...:) ZenZagg August 4, 2003 7:49PM Good news? I finally found out what my problem is. The bad news? I haven't found any useful information yet--save for doping myself up--to help me. Any insights/answers are welcome and appriciated... Athena Falconess August 4, 2003 12:02PM I got a job! Yay! I'm going to be a game room attendant at KSU. Not a lot of money, but at least it's work. I start as soon as Fall semester starts so yayfulness. Crossed Reality August 1, 2003 8:12AM There is a new feature online, and the very end of it reveals something about Jux that you probably didn't know yet. Kitty Vertigo July 30, 2003 3:49PM Yes, so I am on my new computer with a crippling 128MB ram, borrowed, and an old S3 ViRGE. It feels like my eyes have been ripped out. A replacement motherboard is on its way though, so maybe that one will actually work. We're getting the broken RAM replaced too. And maybe the backordered stuff will actually ship someday. But anyways, at least my processor is working, and we all know thats the most important part. My baby is an AMD Athlon XP 2200+ (1800 Mhz). I'm still using my old geforce4, or I would be if the AGP worked. Old HD too... 30GB, but i've never really had a need for a big HD, considering I reformat my computer at least once a month... for fun. Now that you are all bored to tears with stupid "spec braggarting" as I like to call it, I will leave you. Meow. Crossed Reality July 30, 2003 7:57AM I'd be pissed too, Kenny...AGP slots should work pretty much automatically, though... Travis: I'm still dying to play that game. The sequel (keep in mind I'm a month out of date on videogame news) is on the way as well. I'll have to borrow it from you when you're done. Hey, if you were curious, Advance Wars 2 rules. Lash is awesome! Oh, and check your email. Meow. Kitty Vertigo July 29, 2003 11:34PM Kitty's new Computer: *256MB of backordered ram *256MB of broken not working ram *8x AGP slot that doesnt do shit for me (maybe i dont know how to use it) *Pissed off kitty cat ZenZagg July 29, 2003 3:32AM Graeme, and anyone else for that matter: If you like adventure games, Syberia is the best one I have played so far. I remember Graeme mentioning it a while back and saying something about it getting good reviews, and Sara pointed it out the other day at Wal-Mart so I broke down and bought it. I cannot stop playing this game. It is a very rich, imaginative game, with an interesting storyline. Highly recommended to anyone who enjoys a good relaxing adventure. Crossed Reality July 28, 2003 7:35AM Can we get a bit of a description of your new computer, Kenny my man? Kitty Vertigo July 27, 2003 6:20PM My new computer shipped! Yay! I will get it in a week or so, from which point you will hear nothing of me. Not that I don't already neglect you anyways. Meow. BTW, Italy looks sexy. Crossed Reality July 27, 2003 10:48AM There is a new feature online, by me, composed of some of my photos from Italy. They're pretty :) Crossed Reality July 26, 2003 3:13PM Are you telling me no one had ANYTHING to say the ENTIRE time I was on the bay of Naples? Crossed Reality July 23, 2003 7:59AM Well, my travel journal is now online as a feature! I was going to try to post some images, but without FTP it would take way too long, especially since I forgot to resize them from two megapixels...I'll try again at a later date, though. I promise! Athena Falconess July 22, 2003 9:00PM Well, I'm moving out of my mom's house and in with my grandmother. However, I haven't told my mom about this yet. I hope she takes it well cause I'm leaving either way. I would just rather it be on good terms. So, wish me luck! Athena Falconess July 21, 2003 6:08PM Wow Sam, those are really good. I'm glad I was able to help you get them up now. Feel free to email or IM me anytime. Kitty Vertigo July 21, 2003 1:46PM Okay. I thought I had fixed the feature poster, and it actually worked for Sam's second feature, but then on the third it broke again so I had to do some more "name changing". I'm really not sure what the problem is, but I think it is user stupidity. Lets all be lazy and read the triple feature fabulous by Sam. Thanks Sam! Maybe next time I will not mess up and post them when they are sent. Meow. Kitty Vertigo July 21, 2003 1:18PM I have some good news and some bad news! The good news is that I have posted one of Sams features! It's awesomely entertaining! Go read it and forget about this bad news stuff. Now, the bad news is that some moron made a poorly designed feature poster that doesn't work properly when someone tries to post a guest feature. I had to edit some stuff by HAND so that Sam would get credit for her work instead of me. I'm gonna look at the feature poster and see if I can fix it before posting the other two. Yes that's right, the amazing Sam has two more features waiting to be posted. Meow. Crossed Reality July 20, 2003 6:11AM Wow. I just read the Porkaso feature for the first time and laughed my ass off in an internet cafe. Now I am all caught up on Jux features. Kenny, you should feel horrible for what you did to poor Samantha. She was sad and thought she was insignificant :( Anyway, let me see if I can copy part of an email I just sent to Viv as a right-quickie feature. It might not work, so, if there is no feature, don't be surprised or sad. I might be able to post my travel journal as a feature soon, too, but don't get your hopes up, kay? Kitty Vertigo July 20, 2003 3:59AM My bad! We've got a pair of guest features for you by Sam, but I am stupid and deleted one with a bunch of spam mail, and need a title and such for the other. Sorry Sam, I feel really bad about messing up. I'd like to take this opportunity to blame Graeme, because if he were here this wouldn't've happened. It's not fair to blame him, but I will anyways, even if its just in jest. Now that I'm expecting this, I'll try not to delete it and get you some groovy guest feature festivities. Meow. Athena Falconess July 17, 2003 7:37PM There's a new feature up. It's a sad one, but it did help me feel better... Kitty Vertigo July 17, 2003 2:40PM What are you doing here? There is nothing to see here! It's not like I have anything important to say. There is no new feature (as far as I know) so you should just hit your back button or pull down your "Bookmarks/Favorites" menu, depending on your browser preferences, and go away. Anyways, has anyone out there ever played Americas Army? Who'd've thought that our Army would make a videogame, and who'd've thought that it would be so addicting? Me and some people played it for 7 or 8 hours straight yesterday. We got to be pretty good as a team. Instead of dieing one by one, we would all die at the same time. Now go read something interesting and get out of my face. Kitty Vertigo July 14, 2003 9:25AM You know what I have always wanted? A Pisan. It is really convenient that I know someone who is currently in Italy where there are plenty of Pisans. Maybe if I ask nicely he will pick one up for me, preferably a young beautifal female Pisan. The thing is, I just want to know if their heads are tilted slightly or if their entire physical orientation is tilted slightly. It's the only explanation I can think of for that lame excuse of a tower. If I had my own Pisan I could show her how a REAL tower stands up. Meow. Crossed Reality July 14, 2003 8:35AM Hello everyone. Thank you for the wonderful post card Kenny. I've not had time to read any of the other features you've done, since time on the 'net is quite precious in this country. I'm paying 3 euros for an hour right now, although I'll probably pay 12 euros for 5 hours the next time I fill up this card. Anyway, I just got back from a weekend in Venice, this weekend I'm going to Rome, and tomorrow I'll be in Florence. I hope everyone is having a wonderful time back in the home place. Until then, this is CR, signing out... Athena Falconess July 11, 2003 11:09PM I have to say Kenny, that postcard is quite authentic-looking...and true as well. Kitty Vertigo July 10, 2003 3:45PM Feature! I hope you are happy. I realize I could've done the same thing for Zen while he was gone, but I didn't think of it then and I didn't really feel as desperate for feature ideas as I do now. I am doing decently I think. Meow! Kitty Vertigo July 8, 2003 9:51AM I am sorry. I was going to post a feature about 10 minutes from now. It was nearly done, and then my text editor crashed. Yeah it's a lame excuse, but its true. Maybe I'll retype it later, but right now I'm feeling quite the lazy kitty. Meow. ZenZagg July 7, 2003 1:17AM Hahaha, wow Kenny, are you employing midget slaves by any chance to crank out the number of features you've been posting? Uncontrollable laughing on the porkaso thing :D. Anyway, the summer sans Graeme has begun, and we all wish him a wonderful time in ye olde Italy. While he's gone I'll be attempting casual features (I fret over my usual ones too much). Should be fun! Kitty Vertigo July 6, 2003 6:57PM Brand spanking new feature for you! AGAIN! Graeme would be proud of me, even though I am making fun of him indirectly through use of characters that seem to be kinda like his characters, but different in ways. Meow Crossed Reality July 6, 2003 4:50AM I am in Italy. I am also writing this in a little camera shop with one computer. See you guys soon! Kitty Vertigo July 5, 2003 8:06PM Well, he is gone. That means I am in charge. I am power hungry and mean to implement some major changes. For example, I hate blue. The Official Jux Colour is now neon black, with transparent polka dots. Alas, I jest. I could just imaging Graeme's face if he returned to that sight. Anyways, This is just to inform you that there is a new feature up. It's nothing much, but it's worth a quick read. Meow. Crossed Reality July 3, 2003 5:35PM Cool feature Kenny. I've been trying to think of how to say it, and my massive news post lower on this page (or maybe in the archive, depending on when you're reading this) is still the best way...but I'm gone. This is my last assured news post from America, and maybe at all. until halfway through August. So, yeah. Or, as I'm going to say to everyone on AIM tomorrow: I'll brb. Kitty Vertigo July 3, 2003 5:14AM I made a feature for you! Go look at, or read it, or whatever you do with them. Meow. Crossed Reality June 29, 2003 5:13PM There's a new feature up, the final one before I leave for Italy. I hope you enjoy it, or at least what it links to. Crossed Reality June 26, 2003 11:54PM Well guys, I don't see how I'm going to have time to do another feature before I go, unless it's a goodbye feature. I feel horrible. I thought I would have time to update right until the very end, but that's obviously not the case. To prevent this from being some emo livejournal post about how much I have to do, blah blah, I'm just going to launch into what IS going to happen, rather than what's NOT going to happen, and the reasons for that. 1) There will be guest features while I'm gone. Or there should be. Three people or so have agreed to chip in with the fighting effort to keep Jux alive without me, so we'll see what happens. 2) You still have Kenny, Travis and Laurie. So...yeah, they'll be here too. Hopefully writing a feature or two. 3) I'm going to try to post journal features from Italy. This is NOT A DEFINATE THING. I have no idea if I'll be able to pull that off or not, but I'm going to have my laptop and a digital camera with me while I'm there, and I plan on keeping a travel-journal thing anyway, and taking a shit ton of pictures. When/if I get downtime I'm going to burn those things onto a CD and pray that I find a net cafe that gives me access to a CD-ROM drive. If I do, I'll try to upload some nifty journal stuff for you. While they won't be strictly humourous features like most Jux fair, they'll be written by me...so yeah. Pretty pictures? At the very least I'll toss a newspost or two up while I'm gone. 4) It's not FOREVER. Just from now until sometime in/around August 10th. Probably a bit after that, since my cousin is getting married and I have classes starting RIGHT after I get back. As a final note, not that any of you care, UPS tells me that all the copies of the second draft of my novel that are going to be distributed before I leave are now in the hands of those people to whom they belong. Word. Crossed Reality June 26, 2003 1:21PM Second and final of the two trips to the dentist completed. CR's mood: Mooooooooahrn. ZenZagg June 24, 2003 4:20PM After a month of traveling, I am finally back. So...nearly two weeks in a cross country road trip to Oregon to visit my Grandma, another week in Mexico doing mission work, and finally a week in Florida with Sara's family to relax and get sunburned just bad enough that I peel again. It's ok, peeling is fun and entertaining! I've been gone a month, and now that I'm back, my perspective on terra familia has changed, I am fighting tooth and nail to not fall back into the rut I was in before. Also, Graeme is leaving for even longer than I was gone 2 weeks from now. You guys just aren't going to get the full Juxation anytime soon are you? :D Maybe kenny will spontaneously decide to go backpacking in the Ozarks the week Graeme gets back? Only time will tell. Crossed Reality June 24, 2003 5:11AM Where have I been? Well... The second draft of my novel is finished. Word. Crossed Reality June 23, 2003 4:56PM I want one! Please? I'll take a new Athlon64 system too, if you've got one back there somewhere. Check behind the apples. Kitty Vertigo June 23, 2003 3:41PM Last night we were bored so some friends and I built a computer from spare parts. Its way crappy, but thats what spare parts do. At least we didn't have to pay anything for it. I've been reading Harry Potter V, and I must say it is an excellent book. Go read it! Snuffleupagus rules. Meow. Crossed Reality June 21, 2003 2:24PM Actually, while I am holding a copy of the Order of the Phoenix in my hand at this second, I doubt I'll get to read it until I get to Italy. Over the next few days it's work, girlfriend, and most of all...CRASH COURSE BOOK EDITING. After that, I have to do a research report and finish a 500 page Roman history book. My study abroad session's impact on Jux has already begun. Kitty Vertigo June 21, 2003 3:45AM "At work" my cute little kitty butt! He's just making a cover story. He is actaully going to be reading the new Harry Potter book the next few days. I know I will be if I ever get it. Meow! Crossed Reality June 21, 2003 1:37AM Work approaches. Lots of it. I suspect I might be eeriely silent the next few days...although, that could just be a warning to cover my ass, even if I'm talkative as ever! HAH! Crossed Reality June 19, 2003 8:32PM Damn dentist. When, oh when, will the numbness flee my poor face? But my teeth look better! Nummy. Crossed Reality June 18, 2003 9:02PM I forgot to mention that each and every Pocket Kenny also comes with two free Bob the Martian stickers, useful for decorating your car, laptop, or sister. Speaking of sisters, have you ever wondered why we give little girls dolls and stuff to play with? One of them was just in here fighting with her sister over who the "baby" belonged to. We spend so much time teaching them to be motherly and want children, then when they hit thirteen...BAM..."DEAR GOD DON'T GET PREGNANT." Does this make any sense to anyone? Then again, we let kids play with guns too...nevermind. Crossed Reality June 18, 2003 8:44PM There's a new feature up. Will I do any more of these? Eh...I didn't intend to do THIS one. Athena Falconess June 18, 2003 2:54PM Okay, I can't figure out what's wrong with my ears. First, my hearing is pretty much normal, maybe a little above average, then I couldn't hear out of my left ear, then my hearing was like supersonic, and now I can't hear out of my right ear. It's more than just a little annoying. Also, 2:54 PM hasn't happened yet. Apparently, the jux timer is an hour ahead. *shrugs* Oh well. Kitty Vertigo June 18, 2003 2:33PM Sadistic Torture. Hiss. Crossed Reality June 17, 2003 4:27AM ...despite the Final Fantasy XI box below, there's a new feature up! Crossed Reality June 17, 2003 3:29AM Crossed Reality June 16, 2003 6:08PM Final Fantasy XI came. I picked it up and opened it right before I had to go to work. Now I am sad. Even though Vivian was there, and that made me slightly less sad, I was still sad, and excited, even though I couldn't play it right then. I took a beautiful picture. I will post it later. When I get home. And start playing. Crossed Reality June 15, 2003 9:50PM I wish I could write every idea that came to me. I'm going to start writing more of them down, saving them for later...that hardly ever works, but it might if I write down what inspires them. Maybe. [/angsty writer moment] Crossed Reality June 15, 2003 4:15PM There's a new feature up. It's Bobby the Deity. Remember him? It's a bit of a different style and point of view than the old ones, though. I have one more feature idea rattling around up there...after that, I'm not sure. I'm getting busier and busier with stuff that has to be done before I go to Italy. I've fallen behind in my reading for the trip, actually; I think I'm going to have to spend a large chunk of this week catching up. Part of what this means to you is that the lessening of Crossed Reality features is going to begin already. I know some people are ready and willing to take over in July and early August, but I'm not sure if anyone can pick up my slack now. It's safe to say this summer is going to be relatively bare of me, though. I do have a FEW ideas for features that I MAY be able to post while in Italy, depending on Net Cafe access. We shall see...if my ideas work, it would be great, though. Crossed Reality June 14, 2003 12:42PM Man am I tired. I can't wait to pass out at five o'clock. It appears Zen switched from Mexico to Florida last night. Good for him. The time of his return to Georgia grows nigh, I suppose. I've been thinking of new Jux features to do. One of them I really wanted to do today, but I just can't as tired as I am. I'll probably do it tomorrow. It'll either be funny, or stupid as hell. Either way I'm sure you'll enjoy it for some reason. Another set involves my second novel. By now, you're well aware of the saga of my first, A Man on a Hill. The ideas behind the second are well under way, although I've yet to put words on paper for any of its chapters. That's a process that can begin as soon as my first is finished up. But, since The Eternal City is going to take place in a new, more stylistic version of "reality" than I've written in before, with plenty of fantastical elements thrown in, I've been thinking of doing a few short stories to get my feel for the universe up. The novel itself is only going to look at some of what I have in mind for what's going on at a very narrow angle; in fact, the book NEVER explains why some of the things that are happening, happen. It wouldn't make sense, since the characters would have no way of knowing or finding out. Doing a few short stories completely outside the plot, but showing a few of the possibilites of what I have in mind, interests me a lot. I have no idea if I'll actually go through with it, but we'll see, won't we? Part of me wants to start the server move now. Part of me is stupid. Crossed Reality June 13, 2003 4:17PM Septic Troubles?: (g) Do you want a free gift? (g) If You Own a Septic Tank Please request your 100% Free Sample of SPC Septic Cleaner We're so confident in our product that we're giving it away! http://www.salesplussales.net/spc3/ CrossedReality: Cool! IM spam! Please accept your free sample of go to hell and fuck your mother with a broom handle! Crossed Reality June 13, 2003 3:44AM Dear Jux Readers: As if you care, but my biography on the Members page has changed a little bit. Dear Jux Staff, especially Laurie: I'm going to post some things on the staff page soon that you'll be needing to look at. Might be tonight, but if not, keep an eye out. Crossed Reality June 12, 2003 7:03AM There's a new Picasso strip up. He'd been gone too long. I find it funny. If you don't...you probably gave up on Picasso comics a long time ago anyway. There are two new pictures of Laurie up in the image gallery, even though I haven't changed the "Last Updated" date yet because I'm lazy. She doesn't like them too much, but I think they're good and show a different Laurie than the one seen here before, and she doesn't really mind that they're up, so up they stay. I also added Kenny's John Lennon pictures. And now, to go luggage shopping! Crossed Reality June 11, 2003 10:35PM Kenny just used "Wouldn't've'd" in a conversation. I am in awe of him. Crossed Reality June 11, 2003 8:10PM There's a new feature up. As for me, I can't wait to get home and go to sleep. All of this staying up until 10:00am wears on a person... Crossed Reality June 11, 2003 10:14AM Those are so going on the photo page when I get not-lazy. Kitty Vertigo June 11, 2003 7:22AM Wow. I have so much to say. Lets start at the beginning. *wavery remembering effect thingie* Saturday morning I "Ran the Rock". It is a 5k run through the streets of Glen Rock the morning of the street fair. I did pretty decently with a time of 29:30. Yes, that is just shy of a half an hour. After crossing the finish line, I puked everywhere. It was kinda fun. I got an award though for being the 3rd 19-29 year old male to cross the line... out of the 3 19-29 year old males running. I forgot to mention that it was raining the entire race. Next up, I had a news post that was lost, but it wasn't anything important. The down time really pissed me off. I was like "where is my Jux?" and it wasn't there, but now it is here, but I don't want to risk this happening again. CR explained it all, so I guess I can skip some stuff. Lastly, I am now officially the only single guy at Jux! Ladies, you know where to find me (right here)! Also, here is a picture of me taken with my crappy web cam, wearing some weird sunglasses. In 8th grade Casey used to call me John Lennon. My creativity took over causing me to reflect Jux in my glasses Meow! Crossed Reality June 10, 2003 8:45PM My feature explaining the down time is now up. Peruse and enjoy...if you can even see this. Crossed Reality June 10, 2003 6:27PM Ug. I'm at work, but it's good to see we're back. I'm going to write a long ass Juxtapositions article tomorrow about why we were down. Needless to say, it's not our fault. It'll also explain the sudden dearth of features. The most important thing that happened while we were down? Graeme got a girlfriend! Jux'ers, say hi to Vivian. Kitty Vertigo June 8, 2003 10:55AM I had a dream last night. I dreamt I was in France. I was given a bowl of French noodles. They were not ordinary noodles however, there was a specific way to eat them. They were made to be eaten through the nose. I had a dream of slurping noodles through my nose. Meow. Crossed Reality June 7, 2003 10:34AM There's a feeeeeeeature up. :D I'm going to get in trouble for this one. Damn you Travis for giving me a hilarious idea. Crossed Reality June 6, 2003 10:03PM I'm pulling a nine hour shift in the Children's Department tomorrow. If things quiet down, I'll try to write some features. As well, Kenny is apparently doing that Run the Rock thing again this year. I asked if I could get a sequel to his old feature, and he said that he probably wouldn't. Don't worry though, if he doesn't, I'm going to jump into his brain and write one for him! A par-o-dy! Things have been really interesting around Jux land lately. Curiously so, actually. Enough to make one paranoid. Let's do a run down. CR: Top secret AF: Probably the same Zen: Smuggling sheets and towels into Mexico. Really. Kitty: ...actually, his life is pretty much the same. It's confusing as hell around here right now, which is why I haven't written a feature in forever. I will though. Promise. Kitty Vertigo June 5, 2003 8:13PM Frisbee rocks. It is so good to be playing again. There is just something about it that makes me feel everything is in balance. Perhaps it is just exhaustion from exertion, or perhaps it is something else. Either way, it works. Meow. Crossed Reality June 5, 2003 4:18PM Well, like any good fan, I went out and bought St. Anger, Metallica's first new album in years, on the day of release. I used to be hard core into this band. I mean, Metallica was my life. I'll give a full review of the new album later, once my opinion cements itself (it takes more than one listen). Now then, one thing I am impressed by is just how much shit this thing comes with. The damn flip case may irritate me, but for the price of a CD you get: 1) The full St. Anger album. 2) A DVD featuring live performances of the entire album. You know, those things they usually make you pay $20 for a few months later? And it comes in "shitty 5.1 surround." 3) A password to a spot on the Metallica site where you get to, get this, download music for free. They're going to keep adding more stuff. Apparently, at least this is their story now, the only reason Metallica did the whole Napster thing is because they were upset with the quality of what was being traded. I'm actually almost inclined to believe them, since they encourage you to share the code you got with your album with your friends...whether they bought it or not. Also, they're perfectly okay with you trading whatever files you download. Maybe it's revisionist history, but it sure as hell is the right way to do it ;) Kitty Vertigo June 4, 2003 4:45AM New feature here. There is a bit of photoshop traced art in there, as well as a bit of insight into myself. I am only at Stage 1 however, and there is no way of telling when or if I will advance. Meow. Athena Falconess June 3, 2003 7:51PM Well, all I have to say to that is...YES!!! WHOO!!! and that it's about damn time. Crossed Reality June 3, 2003 5:43PM A long while back, I wrote a feature when I was pissed off about a controversial ruling that videogames weren't protected by the first amendment. Guess what? Now they are. Athena Falconess June 2, 2003 9:51PM Okay, well, I'm not going to be doing a feature on The Donnas concert like I promised. Why? Because I have a migraine that even Excedrin seems to only hold at bay, my body aches from head to toe and I don't know why and I still have a court case I need to read for my criminal procedure class pending that I can even stay awake that long. I think I'm just going to crawl back in my little hole now. So, yeah, sorry. Crossed Reality June 2, 2003 3:43PM ROFL Have you tried to access January 2003 features lately? Did you notice they all link to .hmtls? Why the heck didn't you tell us? I'll fix that later, I guess. I can't just edit the feature.html directly anymore, so I'm going to ask Kenny if it's a problem in the .XML file, which I don't have time to mess with right now. Also, Metallica's new album's release date has been MOVED UP...to Thursday! Yay! I just found that out as I was typing this news post. Crossed Reality June 2, 2003 3:07PM Zen is back, although he didn't bother to announce that. Just so you know. Do any of you remember February, where I had classes AND worked every single weekend? Well, guess what? I'm working every single weekend until July! Add to the fact that I have been abnormally busy lately with all sorts of stuff, including finishing work I have to do for the classes I'm going to be taking IN Italy, and I have no idea what's going to become of Jux feature progress. That damn Pikachu dog is scaring the hell out of me, still. Kitty Vertigo June 1, 2003 5:22PM I couldn't help but illustrate it. Kitty Vertigo June 1, 2003 4:56PM I was attacked by the most horrid image as I attempted to sleep. Imagine a little chihuahua. It has yellowish/brownish skin like an old rotting banana. The tips of its ears are a deep black. It shoots lightning bolts. I present to you the Pikachuhuahua. This creature now haunts my dreams. It won't leave me alone! HELP! Meow. Crossed Reality June 1, 2003 3:15PM Jux things to be done: 1) Update the CR bio. Again. 2) Wonder if the feature poster is going to break the next time I post a feature. 3) Wonder if Travis is still alive, or if he died on the way to Oregon. 4) Wonder if Kenny is going to scrounge up enough money to make it down here. 5) Clean the gutters. Athena Falconess May 31, 2003 4:49PM Yes, I am going to do a feature on the concert, but it's going to have to wait since I got busy all of a sudden. Sorry... Crossed Reality May 31, 2003 12:32AM Well, that was a blast. Especially for the price. Laurie says she's going to do a feature about it. Mostly about how I acted while there... Crossed Reality May 30, 2003 12:33PM Kenny, that was funny as hell. Now, the point of my post. It is 72 degrees in Georgia. But according to every little weather thingie, including my own skin, it FEELS like it's about 85. You gotta love humidity and direct sunlight. Eat it, Florida. Kitty Vertigo May 30, 2003 5:56AM Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Dr Pepper make a delicious breakfast, even if breakfast is not really breakfast. As you can see, It is currently 6:00 in the morning. However, what is not optically avaliable for you to examine, is the fact that I havn't been to sleep. What is the point? The point is that I usually define breakfast as the meal eaten within a relatively short period of time after waking up. Since I havn't slept, I havn't woken up, which makes this not breakfast. However, because I am eating a breakfast food, at a time of the day in which one typically eats breakfast, and cannot think of more appropriate term for this meal, I will call it breakfast. Of course, this is all besides the point. My point is that it is tastey. Meow. Crossed Reality May 30, 2003 12:55AM Chances of a feature tomorrow (by which I mean today), are slim. Why? Because.... ...I'm going to a Donnas concert. *cough* Crossed Reality May 29, 2003 8:22PM New feature up. I think we're starting to spoil you poor people. Crossed Reality May 29, 2003 11:36AM Why must the world be so depressing? Alright people, listen up. If Reading Rainbow dies to make room for another Teletubbies or something, I'm going to be damned pissed off. That show is a hallmark. Sure, I've not actually WATCHED it since 1994 or so, but I'm flipping through a TV guide now to find it so I can. Why? Because my childhood is under attack! They butched the new Transformers and Ninja Turtles, muppets are still good, but what about all those strange 80s shows? Yeah, though so. Fight for Reading Rainbow! Somehow! Donate money to PBS with the stipulation that it only go to RR, or something. Crossed Reality May 28, 2003 2:07PM But, the new Picasso feature is up anyway. Crossed Reality May 28, 2003 12:52PM Gaaaaaaaaaaaaah! That's the second time this has happened. It appears I can no longer draw Picasso. God damnit. Crossed Reality May 27, 2003 5:38PM What you see below you is either: A) Our server going "hiccup" OR B) Someone posting something at the exact same time I was. In which case, I do hope they'll make themselves known, since I'm at work and have no idea if and who it was. Watch it be Zen from Oregon, so he'll never realize that his desired statement never made it to the main page. Still, feature's up. Crossed Reality May 27, 2003 5:36PM There's a new feature up. I got to use the term "Pogromic Praetors", so it's ALL good now baby. Crossed Reality May 27, 2003 5:36PM There's a new feature up. I got to use the term "Pogromic Praetors", so it's ALL good now baby. Crossed Reality May 26, 2003 3:44PM Today being Memorial Day, I hope you weren't expecting much in way of a feature, a'cause you won't be getting one. I don't think, anyway. Not from me. Instead, I added a few new pictures to the photo gallery! One of me, two of uber-cat Whitie, both taken with my new shiny digital camera. This picture: Was taken after I walked in from running about looking for the new Deftones CD in a rainstorm. We have a whole lot of those in Georgia. The only reason I'm so wet is because I graciously let the camera woman have the only under-sized umbrella in my car for her personal use. Have a happy day remembering dead people! Athena Falconess May 25, 2003 11:30PM Well, I'm working on another feature that I'm going to try hard to get done tonight because otherwise, I'm not going to be able to work on it again for a few days. It's not really that great a feature. Just another little story that goes on in my head. Nothing more. Crossed Reality May 25, 2003 9:36PM Rome: Total War That screen shot makes me weep. Crossed Reality May 24, 2003 8:25PM Wouldn't it be cool if, like, I started singing, and Travis learned guitar, and Kenny learned bass, and Laurie hit things with sticks, and we'd be all like "Hey! The Jux Entente is a band now!" and we'd cover the weirdest songs ever? Every album would have to include a Beatles tune and a song originally written by a girl band. Because, you know, the world needs a hardcore version of "Dancer in a Daydream" or "You're My Favourite Mistake". There's a good possibility I'm just saying that to cover my ass for singing Donnas tunes lately, you know that, right? I started thinking today of who I'm going to have to dedicate my book to. I wonder if they have a limit. Here's what it looks like currently: Granny, the Hames clan, Mom, Dad, that girl who lived with us, Whitie the magical editing cat, The Jux Entente, Rebecca, Samantha, Ryann, and Jonesie. Crossed Reality May 24, 2003 1:35PM Just got back from Erin's graduation. It went nice. I have over 100 pictures. I'm also weirdly depressed, but it's for a reason that's WAY too complex to describe here. It'll go away soon. Always does. Crossed Reality May 24, 2003 6:54AM Remind me to back everything up on May 31st...and you DID try the feature poster, remember? You were just recreating one of mine as a test ;) Kitty Vertigo May 24, 2003 1:34AM Wow... I suppose that leaves me the only person yet to try the feature poster. Its been working perfectly so far. We'll see what happens June 1st though. Miaou! Crossed Reality May 23, 2003 11:18PM Marketing people are right. Graphs boost performance ;) I just picked up a PowerShot A60 to use on my trip to Italy, as well as my sister's graduation tomorrow. I'm still playing around with it and learning the ropes (I took a few pictures with my finger obscuring part of the flash because...well, I wasn't expecting it to be there, I guess, I don't know), but I'm pretty pleased with results so far. I imagine, much like my poor, cheap ass web cam which now serves no purpose, the longer I play the better it will get. I can manually set everything but the damn thing's atomic weight, so I'm in pretty good shape as far as tweaking for best results go. I almost got the A70, but decided I didn't feel like printing all that many 8x10s :) Athena Falconess May 23, 2003 10:08PM Well, I have used the new feature poster as well now and I love it. I wrote my feature on the fun time I had at my old high school's graduation. I find it humourous at any rate. ZenZagg May 23, 2003 2:14PM Yes, the news is true, I leave today to visit my grandmother for the first time in 14 years. I should be back on June 1st, then I'm leaving the 7th for Mexico, and then I'm leaving the 14th when I get back for Florida with Sara's family. 15000 miles round trip roughly...whew. Oh, did I tell you we're DRIVING to Oregon? :D I just tried out the new feature poster, and I like it! Check out the features page for my experimental debut of Fiction Snips! Crossed Reality May 23, 2003 1:23PM Caller: Is Marlene Hefner there? Graeme: No, she's not here right now. Caller: Okay. Is that the Marlene Hefner that used to work on the South Texas Nuclear Project? Graeme: No... Caller: She never would have lived in Texas? Graeme: No, she's never lived anywhere but Georgia. Caller: Okay, thank you. Weirdest. Call. Ever. Crossed Reality May 23, 2003 12:33PM Travis is leaving for Oregon at some point today. He should remember to pop on and tell you about it first, though. On the feature front, I might put something up later, although I'm pretty distracted with the novel editing and "Roman Society", a new book I'm reading. I have a few more ideas about how to expand Jux feature content again, but they're just vague thoughts at the moment...what comes, comes ;) Crossed Reality May 22, 2003 10:28AM I've been on a damn roll with news posts lately. Mostly because I've been over-achieving on the Jux front. Although, really, it's just more proof that last summer MIGHT repeat itself, at least briefly ;) Anyway, the subject of this one is fun. A few months ago I did a pie chart of all the features on Jux. Well, I just remembered that, and since I kept the excel book around, I did a quickie update on it. Our total features now look like this: Now then, things still look mostly the same, with the exception that the Pac-Man has closed in a bit since Travis, Laurie and "Other" have lost some ground since February. It's important to remember a few things. This chart is not a display of the actual amount of work done on the site. If it was, Kenny's share would be much larger, since he's written every damn tool the staff uses on a daily basis. As well, some of those "other" features are actually co-op pieces written by two or more of the other staff members. Something to think about. Now, here's something you haven't seen before. Feature production by month, including this one, which you should remember isn't over yet. At first this looks bad. But I don't think it is. When the site first started we worked at a breakneck pace to get content up. Some of the stuff from then suffered as a result. Now, we post fewer features per month, but we have a huge backlog, and those that do go online are just as good, if not better, than the best from the past. It just shows we're maturing as a website, I think. You can also mark a slight upswing beginning. Hurray for that ;) This ends Graeme's "fun with numbers" corner. Crossed Reality May 22, 2003 8:24AM Right after I said that...I found outsomething else. The site that, basically, inspired what this page has become...is dead. Dead. Dear. God. No. Brunching was one of the first sites I started reading regularly as soon as I got my own computer. I'm glad the book of ratings, often ripped off (...here), will live on. Crossed Reality May 22, 2003 8:18AM Okay, I just changed all the t-shirts in the store a little bit. The old blue-and-gold banner has been changed to simple black text, in a more Juxly font. I think it improves all of our shirts quite a bit. Crossed Reality May 22, 2003 6:08AM I'm in the Final Fantasy XI Playstation 2 beta test!#@E@#$%@#%#$%@#$% Wooooooooooooooooooooo! At the very least, I get a free Playstation 2 HDD for this. When I send back the beta test unit, they send me a consumer unit free of charge as a "thank you" ;) It's supposed to ship in the "coming weeks" because the beta test "begins in June". Dear god at least get here before the second week of June, so I can rape you before I have to leave for Italy. Crossed Reality May 21, 2003 7:54PM New feature up. It's about...The Donnas! I just got the idea for it. What me think it's not funny at all later. Oh well ;) Crossed Reality May 21, 2003 8:33AM I forgot to mention that some stuff that really has no point there is disappearing now that we're going to have more real "Jux" stuff. All Iowa and Wisconsin items are disappearing ;) Georgia remains because...most of us live in Georgia. As for the Nebraska apron...everyone I know would kill me if I got rid of that, and I still think it's damn funny, and it DOES have something to do with the site ;) Crossed Reality May 21, 2003 8:28AM I've gone crazy in the store again. This happens from time to time. I love our new Kitty Vertigo stuff so much that now you can have a Kitty Vertigo bear or mousepad. Not to mention that I added a long sleeved shirt to the mix. A Picsso "I Like Pants" shirt is going to go up in just a few minutes, as well as some more random CR stuff. And I'll probably do a feature about random stuff I wish I could put in there. Whee! Crossed Reality May 20, 2003 9:35PM I don't get "hot" angry. I don't explode and let it all out and then go one with life. I fester. I boil and boil like a pressure cooker, until eventually, I either explode, or release it all in a constructive manner. Stupid work ;) Crossed Reality May 20, 2003 4:12PM There are four new products in the store as of right now. Three versions of our new Kitty Vertigo shirt, and a new shirt bearing my lovely signature image. Enjoy. Buy! Crossed Reality May 20, 2003 11:43AM Sweet Jesus. Why does that scare the hell out of me? I sense another Rebirth Enterprises feature coming. Although I already did the semi-anti-sex thing this week with the Raping Jesus thing...eh, who cares, this is just too horrifying to go un-Juxed ;) Crossed Reality May 20, 2003 7:17AM I have also, apparently, just developed a weird case of artists block and can't draw Picasso. He keeps coming out wrong. Oh well, I guess I'll just go edit my book ;) Crossed Reality May 20, 2003 6:43AM I'm drinking orange juice and eating white grapes. Something feels terribly wrong about this, but I'm not sure what. Kitty Vertigo May 19, 2003 1:27PM I am offended by that feature. Crossed Reality May 19, 2003 6:38AM There's a feature up, if you define feature very loosely :D Crossed Reality May 19, 2003 5:17AM I can say, quite proudly, that I have now broken my Ragnarok Online addiction. It was a sacrifice that had to be made to get some shit done. I'll still be playing sometimes, but for the most part, it's time to read the shit I have to read and edit what I have to edit ;) Crossed Reality May 18, 2003 1:22AM Well, I was hoping to wait until Kenny and I were online at the same time to try to figure out what exactly happened, but I was right. One of our ht files randomly deleted itself, apparently. I ended up just re-uploading the thing from a backup we did just before the feature poster went live. But, that feature is now online. Hurray. Crossed Reality May 17, 2003 1:14PM Okay, there seems to be a problem with our staff services at the moment not logging us in correctly. I think I've found a way around it, and I know this news post will work, so we'll see. My working theory from here is that it has something to do with the .htaccess file, but I could be wrong. I'm at work and have no real way of finding out right now. But, I do have a feature to post, which is what I'm trying to do without fucking up everything. If a new feature comes online in just a few seconds, then I did this right. If not, wait until later when one of us figures out what the heck is going on ;) The Jayde feature is still coming, but is going to wait a little bit longer than I thought because I want documented evidence of something plus a few opinions from other members of the Jux crew. I'm thinking it might be a group feature. Crossed Reality May 16, 2003 5:14AM you don't remember me but i remember you i lie awake and try so hard not to think of you but who can decide what they dream? and dream i do... i believe in you i'll give up everything just to find you i have to be with you to live to breathe you're taking over me have you forgotten all i know and all we had? you saw me mourning my love for you and touched my hand i knew you loved me then i believe in you i'll give up everything just to find you i have to be with you to live to breathe you're taking over me i look in the mirror and see your face if i look deep enough so many things inside that are just like you are taking over ---------------- There's a new feature coming tonight (probably) based on what happened LAST night after Travis and I saw the Matrix. It's called...Great Moments In Jux Entente History: Jayde. As for the Matrix, it rocked socks. Crossed Reality May 14, 2003 5:04PM Dear April, Random stuff is not what we do here at the Jux Entente. We prefer to discuss serious topics of the day, like how band-aids cause brain cancer, and why the world is going to end in 2435 when Jesus comes back riding at the front of an unholy army of Muslim Hindus, slaying all of our women and raping our trees. Thank you for understanding why I cannot comply with your request. Signed, Epstein's Mother Crossed Reality May 13, 2003 10:08PM There's a new feature up. The first one ever posted by our feature poster. Revel in its glory. Crossed Reality May 13, 2003 11:14AM Whoah. I shudder when I think of the first poor people who try to convince people that those are real money in Spittle County, USA. Crossed Reality May 12, 2003 10:35AM ...that should be Ragnarok Online, of course. All of you that have been at this site since the Totally Hat! days are having a field day by now, I'm sure. We've been taking lots of screenshots of the reborn Hat!...they might be worth posting as a feature of some sort. Crossed Reality May 12, 2003 6:06AM As was forewarned, Ragnaron Online has claimed the lives of the Jux Entente crew. But, there is some good news. We think our Feature Poster has been fixed. Pray. Crossed Reality May 10, 2003 12:29AM Holy shit. Those are the scariest things I have ever seen. I'm terrified they're going to try to come after me now. Crossed Reality May 9, 2003 1:28AM It appears there were a few problems with the feature poster. Unexpected ones. Here's the facts on the issue: It works perfectly in our test environment (by which we mean Kenny's computer in Linux mode). But, there are a few issues with actually implementing it on our server. We're working on it. Part of me just wants to start hosting this damn site myself, but I suspect that would raise the cost just a lil bit ;) There's a new feature coming up in just a few minutes as well. It was supposed to be the first posted with the feature poster, but since that looks to be a little while in coming, we'll just do it this way. Crossed Reality May 8, 2003 2:46AM Whoops...forgot to mention that the feature was up ;) Crossed Reality May 7, 2003 7:06PM There will be a feature up tonight, since I completed it two days ago. I'm going to talk to Kenny when I get home and see if maybe...maybe the Feature poster would be able to go live to night. If we can hold off RO'ing for a few hours, I don't see why it can't ;) Speaking of RO...I need to take a break from it for awhile tomorrow to do some book editing. Level treadmilling is NOT a good way to get a second draft done, no siree bob howdy junior what's for breakfast. Kitty Vertigo May 6, 2003 5:28PM Ahh the good old days... you can wait a few more monthes for the feature poster right? *plays RO* MEOW!! Crossed Reality May 6, 2003 8:24AM Crossed Reality May 6, 2003 7:04AM Well, it's true. Ragnarok Online came back on May 1st, and we heard about it last night. Hat! has just been reorganized as Zhakrin reached level 8 as a novice, on his way to being a Swordsman. Will I ever reach the 40s in levels again? God I hope so. My memory is fond of being level 30 and up, not of slaving away at level 9 like I am now ;) What does this mean for Jux? It means it's a good thing I finished a Picasso strip last night, because, otherwise, your updates just got fucked up the ass. Crossed Reality May 6, 2003 4:16AM I don't want to jump the gun here, because I'm not entirely sure it's true, and I won't know for about another half an hour, but... Hey Kenny, meet me in Izlude :P Crossed Reality May 6, 2003 1:59AM Yep, the feature poster is definately done. The feature that I just put up (that means UPDATE people) was created by it, only on Kenny's computer where we test it. I then moved the html file over here. Like he said, it'll be pretty seamless ;) The only major difference in my opinion is that the sometimes-witty html file names are gone forever. Kitty Vertigo May 5, 2003 8:41PM I just completely destroyed my CSE final. It was so much fun. I can't possibly get less than an A on it. In other news, I finished the feature poster, subject to a few more tests. Within the week it will be integrated for your featurely pleasure. Hopefully you won't even notice, except for an increase in feature postage. Not postage as in like the post office, but postage as in the process of posting. I'm getting confused. Meow. Crossed Reality May 5, 2003 11:01AM 99x is giving away a trip to space this week. A damn radio contest. Trip to space. Jesus christ, I might just enter ;) Crossed Reality May 4, 2003 11:37PM If you have any clues as to the whereabouts of Travis or Laurie, please let us know. We're beyond desperate. Now then, why didn't you get a feature today? Because I was too busy editing my novel. I got two whole fucking chapters done. Part of it was because Chapter 9 was damn near perfect already. I can't believe I wrote that. Seriously. Damn. The other reason? A'cause I decided to hang out with her for awhile. Tremble in fear as I show you how badly video comes out from my webcam when you're backlit (and I don't bother to hook up the microphone). Also, I'm lazy. Kitty Vertigo May 4, 2003 8:47PM Travis and Laurie have been kidnapped by a group of rogue platypusi. We're not sure when exactly occured but it was sometime between now and a while ago. More details to come. Meow. Crossed Reality May 3, 2003 7:38PM Yet another new feature up. And tomorrow...well, I might have something for you. Crossed Reality May 3, 2003 4:46PM My novel editing is approaching the halfway point. When I stopped last night, it was at 40%. Chapters 1-7 had been fully red penned and corrected in the computer. If I keep up this pace, I'll be golden :D Crossed Reality May 2, 2003 6:36PM Just saw X-men 2. It's pretty good. Better than the first. My only problem? It sets up the third movie. And the third movie is going to be based around the most cliche, overdone X-men storyline ever. Even the cartoon show did it to death. Yes. THAT one. Kitty Vertigo May 2, 2003 2:48PM Meow! Get your featurey goodness right here baby! Enjoy and come back for more! Meowza! EXCLAMANIA!!!! Crossed Reality May 1, 2003 11:03PM There's a new feature up. Sadly, it's a rather serious one. Crossed Reality April 30, 2003 7:02PM Look here What's interesting isn't that this happened, but why it happened, don't you think? Kitty Vertigo April 30, 2003 2:03PM http://www.cnn.com/2003/TECH/internet/04/28/antispam.campaign.reut/index.html. The only word that comes to mind is "hypocrite." They send us a seemingly limitless number of those useless AOL and MSN free trial discs. Why do they want to prevent others from spamming if they do not prevent themselves from spamming at the same time? Meow. Crossed Reality April 30, 2003 12:30PM Well...Ikaruga is here a day early. It seems I forget to subtract the Atlanta factor from my delivery estimate. How will this affect tonight's feature, I wonder... Kitty Vertigo April 30, 2003 10:20AM bool insanity_check(person a_person) {      return( a_person.lack_of_sleep() ||              a_person.mental_problems() ||              a_person.is_juxed() ||              a_person.is_talking_in_code() ||              a_person.pretends_to_be_cat()); } $echo insanity_check(Kitty Vertigo) true $ I think I've flipped... took me forever to line that up properly... meow. Crossed Reality April 30, 2003 12:19AM Is it better to burn out, or fade away? What the hell is this all for? Do I love her? Are those Oaty O's? Dag, j0. Where the hell are my pants? Juxly goodness, coming at ya much later today :D Crossed Reality April 28, 2003 10:39PM There is a new Picasso feature online. Also, if you haven't checked out Apple's new music service, you should. It's the first pay-to-download service that's worth using. Seriously. Crossed Reality April 28, 2003 1:16PM I have no clue what she's talking about either, and I'm just as curious as you are. There's a feature of some sort coming tonight, most likely. If I'm ambitious, it's a text thing I've been planning. If I'm lazy...Picasso! Athena Falconess April 28, 2003 10:51AM Never again...never fucking again. Crossed Reality April 28, 2003 4:03AM Well, I just finished my Statistics final project. This has been a damn busy weekend, what with orientation for my study abroad trip in Italy, camping with Zen on the spur of the moment, and other things. This is certainly the first time I've written a five page MATH PAPER. Things should get back to normal at Jux about now. At least until something else comes up. Which it will. Soon. I can promise you that ;) Crossed Reality April 27, 2003 7:10PM Number 5............ALIVE Kitty Vertigo April 27, 2003 5:57PM Wouldn't you like to be a Pepper too? Crossed Reality April 25, 2003 3:23PM I'm in sort of a groove with editing, so the feature I had planned for today is going to have to wait, it looks like. But, I'm through Chapter 5! That means Draft 2 of A Man on a Hill is now (roughly) 1/4 of the way done. Crossed Reality April 23, 2003 11:01PM There's a new feature up. It's...uhrm...better than the last Picasso feature, as far as most of you are concerned. I liked the last Picasso though, so I think you're all crazy. Crossed Reality April 22, 2003 8:13PM I think I'm going to start using a 9 point "Cloud Sytem" to describe my moods. Right now, I'm on cloud 5! My friend Lauren's advice is frustrating because she's positive. Damn you positive advice, DAMN YOU STRAIGHT TO HELL! DAMN THE ROCKET SLED YOU RAN OVER MY MONKEY WITH LAST CHRISTMAS IN VEGAS WHERE WE WERE ON THE DUDE RANCH THAT HAD THOSE HOOKERS WHO THOUGHT WE WERE COOL BUT WE WEREN'T BECAUSE WE HAD FLOWN THERE ON AIRTRAN EVEN THOUGH IT DIDN'T FLY TO THAT CITY YET! Crossed Reality April 21, 2003 11:14PM I lied. There's a new feature online. Crossed Reality April 21, 2003 9:16PM Due to complications thanks to the fact that finals work is building up, feature has been postponed until tomorrow. Just wait until May 1st, when all of this feature/no feature stuff can finally end. Freakin` classes :| Crossed Reality April 21, 2003 5:01PM For the first time ever tonight you're going to get a RAVE feature from me, rather than a RANT. It's going to be Top 5 rather than Bottom 5! ...which means it will probably be very much so less funny! :| Kitty Vertigo April 21, 2003 2:47AM Script started on Mon Apr 21 02:57:21 2003 bash-2.05b$ g++test test.cpp /tmp/cclT9l2v.o(.text+0xf): In function `get_index_recursive(char**&, int)': : the `gets' function is dangerous and should not be used. bash-2.05b$ ./a.out Segmentation fault bash-2.05b$ exit Script done on Mon Apr 21 02:57:38 2003 Meow! Crossed Reality April 20, 2003 5:33PM Today is "mindless Statistics work and novel editing" day. Let's celebrate. Finally got a new machete yesterday. Bwahahahahahahahahhahahaha Crossed Reality April 19, 2003 12:24PM There's a new Picasso feature online. April's turning out to not be such a bad month after all, eh? I thought you'd be surprised with our work ethic :D Crossed Reality April 18, 2003 9:54PM Someone told me once that there's a right and wrong, and that punishment would come to those who dare to cross the line. But it must not be true for jerk-offs like you. Maybe it takes longer to catch a total asshole. but I'm tired of waiting. Maybe it's just bullshit and I should play GOD, and shoot you myself. Because I'm tired of waiting. Consequences dictate our course of action and it doesn't matter what's right. It's only wrong if you get caught. If consequences dictate my course of action I should play GOD and shoot you myself. I'm very tired of waiting. I should kick you, beat you, fuck you, and then shoot you in your fucking head. (Feature a'coming tomorrow before I go hang out with Zen.) Crossed Reality April 17, 2003 1:35PM Not to bump those little messages from Kenny's friends down...but his new feature IS up...although I'm mad he didn't mention the marshmallows :| Kitty Vertigo April 17, 2003 2:37AM "He really IS!!" - April Kitty Vertigo April 17, 2003 2:34AM "Graeme is HOT!!" - Rachel Crossed Reality April 16, 2003 11:39PM Crossed Reality April 16, 2003 9:46PM I'm going to wait an extra day and make this good. Plus, there's at least a small chance we can do dual features. Think on that. ZenZagg April 16, 2003 5:44PM For some reason (and I don't know how it happened) I suddenly have at least 3 features in the works right now, including Hobart's song. The others are a Juxtapositions article to the rest of Jux and our faithful readers, and a renewable resource of future features based on an interesting concept that came to me last night. I will try to get the Hobart song done shortly, and as for the other two, Snips #1 is finished, and the Juxtapositions article is yet to be written, but the content is pretty much laid out. I will have to get with Graeme again before I finish it though. Yay for sudden and unexpected explosions of productivity! Crossed Reality April 16, 2003 1:43PM Feature coming tonight. I don't know what it's about yet, but we'll see comrade. Zen still has to sing his song. Athena Falconess April 15, 2003 7:22PM Well, I finally finished my process of getting out of the army and I am now officially emotionally and physically dead. I'm just gonna pass out now. *thud* Crossed Reality April 14, 2003 5:05PM First I'm going to repeat what I said below and say that the Awards are now up. But I'm making this post to announce something very important. Safari now supports tabbed browsing! Whoooo! That's the only thing I really missed when using my laptop instead of my desktop. Crossed Reality April 14, 2003 4:18PM The awards are now up. Have a blast. I'm sure there's something linked within you haven't read. Crossed Reality April 14, 2003 12:47PM That's not the only use of email. Proper use of an IM client requires that the other person actually be on the other end at the time. Travis always bitches to me that I don't have auto-accept on for file sends (and I never will). Email is mainly useful for exactly those situations, when the communcation CAN'T be done immediately. I agree though, that I hardly ever use it in lieu of direct communcation. The First Annual Jux Entente Awards will go up tonight, actually, probably this afternoon in less than two hours. I have to eat first and then I'll put it online. The Second Annual Graeme Pays $35 To Keep The Site Registered will also happen later this month. Kitty Vertigo April 14, 2003 9:42AM I believe that it comes as a result of inferior technology. When telephones became popular I am vertain that the use of snail mail dropped DRASTICALLY. With the rise in instant messaging, there really isn't a need for e-mail, except as a way to mass communicate a message you don't feel like typing to many people at once. Meow. Crossed Reality April 14, 2003 8:04AM In Zen's case, I think it's mostly due to the fact that over the years, he's either developed an aversion to, or forgotten, that email exists. I've gone through periods where I forget that it does as well, actually... ZenZagg April 14, 2003 12:58AM I agree with Graeme--when Kenny's feature poster is done (which from what I have seen rocks my socks), we will be able to post features on our own schedule, which means you'll actually be seeing features from me again! For some reason, I think I would be more inclined to release regular features if I didn't need an intermediary. Mostly due to conflicting schedules. This==Keen. *golf claps* Kitty Vertigo April 13, 2003 9:00PM This is Kitty here, posting from an iMac at the HUB. There is really no purpose to this post other than to prove that CR isn't the only person at this site. See, when all the news posts have zero's next to them, it makes this place seem kinda lonely, so this is to make it happy and party-like. Meow. Crossed Reality April 13, 2003 6:10PM Flat Earth Society These people are funnier than I ever will be. Crossed Reality April 13, 2003 3:19PM Next week is our first anniversary. Damn straight. There's a massive feature going up to celebrate. I'm not sure when I'll be posting it. The proper day would be Wednesday...but, well, we'll see, won't we? Other good news is that features will almost certainly be coming more often from now on. I've already told you one reason for this: SUMMER IS COMING. But there's a second reason. Our new feature poster, the second automation project by Kitty Vertigo, is nearly completion. Did you notice how much more we started posting news when he finished his News Poster? Yeah. Think about it. Crossed Reality April 12, 2003 6:01PM Kenny: your saying you will provide me with food for the duration of my visit? CrossedReality: ...I thought I was doing that anyway. So long as you don't expect to eat at red lobster every night. Kenny: vomit = seafood = chinese food < good CrossedReality: While you're in my house, you'll eat my food, I was assuming...other than that, we crash at like fuckind Wendy's and Wafflehousen. I can't stand sea food either. CrossedReality: I was just thinking of some place with overpriced food :) Kenny: denny's? Kenny: outback! CrossedReality: There are no Denny's here. I ate at one for the first time when I went to San Francisco. Outback we've got. Kenny: outback = $$$$$$$$$ CrossedReality: Don't you remember Wafflehouse? It's just like Denny's with cheaper and better food, but smoking. Kenny: i remember no wafflehouse CrossedReality: ...you lived in the south how long, and you never ate at wafflehouse? CrossedReality: There are THREE of them in CANTON! CrossedReality: ...although there was only one when you left. Crossed Reality April 12, 2003 12:04PM I've noticed a weird side effect of preparing to be gone for a major chunk of the summer. The rest of the months are sorta bleeding together. Movies and games coming out in May and June all seem to be part of one big month, and I have a mental blindspot to anything I'm going to missing while I'm in Italy. Currently, that looks to only be Tomb Raider 2, so I don't think I'm in that bad of shape. With the semester heading rapidly towards a flaming end, one can't help but look forward to better times ahead. Plans for the summer appear magically in the air. Should we drag Kenny down to Georgia? Should I start hanging out with old friends again since they'll all be in town? Perhaps, maybe, I should move to a cabin in south Georgia with a fishing pole, change my name to Clarence, and write brutal erotica under the pseudonym "Tickay Humbaggae". Crossed Reality April 11, 2003 12:25PM There's definately a new feature online now baby. And it involves singing. Crossed Reality April 10, 2003 11:17PM New feature; new links in the Link Farm. Crossed Reality April 9, 2003 2:30PM I really, really wished we'd focused more on writing quality...mooaaaahrn. Kitty Vertigo April 8, 2003 9:29PM Meowza! I wrote you all a happy nice feature! I recieved inspiration tonight at dinner in a strange convseration. So I wrote about it! Go read it! Now! It is at the top of the features page! Meow! Crossed Reality April 7, 2003 9:44PM The first part of the new big Jux fe-ah-chur has been written, and is waiting on Zen to...finish. Guess what folks? We're doing the original cast recording of Chico the Musical! Currently know members of the production: Unnamed Blob as Chico/Picasso Travis Rosenbaum as Hobart Samantha Boylan as Mrs. Blanchard ...with perhaps more to come! Hopefully in a few days, I can post the first of the tracks, "Where I'm From". It will be followed soon after. Spelling the Vacuum has been updating again. Have you been noticing? I've been missing Elliott online for weeks, so I'll use this as a forum to tell him that Bettie Page is very, very, very scary. But not as scary as Chico the Musical is going to be. I was approached yesterday by the webmaster of Orange Platypus, a site not unlike ours. By which I mean they're ripping off Brunching.com too. I've not read through the whole thing yet, but I like(z0r?) what I see. I'll add it to the Link Farm soon enough, I do believe, but until then, check it here. Athena Falconess April 6, 2003 10:54PM Just to let you know, I'm working on a feature as well. It's one that could only be written from a bisexual female's point-of-view. Crossed Reality April 6, 2003 12:04PM The shaft? I've got something BIG planned ;D Kitty Vertigo April 6, 2003 4:13AM We've really been giving you the shaft lately haven't we? I am sorry about that. I am in the proccess of lacking inspiration for anything to be written at all. Do not fear! Things will liven up again soon! Meow! Crossed Reality April 4, 2003 12:38PM He's sick, and I'm curious. Kitty Vertigo April 3, 2003 9:11PM This is gonna be BIG. Oh and I am sick. What fun. Mew. Crossed Reality April 3, 2003 10:20AM The Jux photo album has been updated. Again. Crossed Reality April 3, 2003 6:53AM This song is a... Oh, hello. I didn't see you there. Kitty Vertigo April 1, 2003 7:55PM I want to hurt something, anything. *Hiss* Crossed Reality April 1, 2003 1:20PM A somewhat interesting study You know what bothers me, though? The people that do these things have no actual idea about the people they're talking about. Allow me to quote this: "But the study found relatively little difference among low-income and high-income teenagers when it came to what is known as the "hard-core" category, or those who buy more than six games per year." While a hard-core gamer does buy more than six games a year, that's hardly an indicator that any gamer would use. Crossed Reality April 1, 2003 7:53AM There's another new Picasso feature up. Aren't you surprised? Go enjoy it, while I revel in the fact that both of the assignments I had due this week have been suddenly pushed back. Crossed Reality March 31, 2003 9:25PM New Picasso feature up. Crossed Reality March 31, 2003 7:51AM Just finished a Picasso feature that will go up tonight. That's... Yeah, whatever. School time. Crossed Reality March 30, 2003 10:31AM New feature up. It's a short story I wrote last night just for kicks. I really should do more of these "short shorts". They're fun to write, quick to write, I don't feel bad if I don't edit them because I know nothing is ever going to happen to them, and they make great features! Hah! The Wind Waker owns you, your children, your children's children, and that puppy you had that was run over by a car. Have you ever played a Zelda game and felt like you would enjoy it more if it had a story that lived up to the setting? Word j0. Crossed Reality March 29, 2003 10:54PM Shit....what day is it? The Wind Waker and the first season of Futurama on DVD...sorry...here's some mints. Forgive me. Athena Falconess March 27, 2003 9:03PM Well, um...now I'm not joining the Army...yeah...sorry. I promise that this is my final decision and this time, I mean it. Crossed Reality March 27, 2003 5:36AM Oh, by the way, new Zelda game. *huggles* Crossed Reality March 26, 2003 12:35PM Holy christ on toast! I just saw three people get pulled over by the Georgia State Patrol in a minute and a half in a 1-mile radius! If I have time later, I'll type up the full story. Athena Falconess March 25, 2003 11:06PM Well, I'm going to be going through my job training during the summer which kind of sucks. I always seem to be working when everyone else is off... Crossed Reality March 25, 2003 10:03PM Gah, screw it. Work and tired. No feature. This site was founded in the summer. When all of us had tons of free time. I think you'd best be waiting for that magical time to come again :) My last day of classes is April 31st... Crossed Reality March 25, 2003 1:11PM The 80th anniversary issue of Time came out today. It's huge, not because of that, but because the anniversary managed to somehow coincide with Gulf War II, which made the cover. But I've talked about the war already. What I thought was really interesting was that they did the 80 moments that defined history, where they picked 80 pivotal moments in time from the past...80 years. All of them had textual descriptions, except one, which just had a picture...of a plane flying into a tower. I'm sure everyone is sick of hearing about it by now. There's not really anything left to say. Picasso comic tonight...I think. Athena Falconess March 24, 2003 11:43PM Rebuttal from McDonald's: Well, we invented the square fish sandwich, so, top that motherfuckers! Crossed Reality March 24, 2003 11:00PM Feature tomorrow. And if you excuse me, I have some emails to get to...or sleep. Sleep is better. Crossed Reality March 24, 2003 3:03AM First: The Academy has proven itself useless for the second year in a row. It looks like we're in another stretch of "What the fuck?" best pictures. Chicago. Feh. Second: What Kenny said below is in no way the official position of the Jux Entente. Kitty Vertigo March 24, 2003 2:47AM I really hate computers. They are just so frustrating. They are kinda like females. If you don't tell them exactly what to do, they fuck everything up. I suppose this is why I've devoted my life to them. Computers that is, not females. Crossed Reality March 23, 2003 7:45PM War is hell. Crossed Reality March 23, 2003 1:04AM Oh my God. Athena Falconess March 21, 2003 9:00PM Well, I guess since I'm going into the army I should make some kind of comments about the war... Look, the truth is, I don't know how I feel. I just wish everyone would quit trying to talk to me about it. Ever since I made the decision to join the army, that's like the only thing anyone ever wants to talk to me about. "Are you sure you want to join?" "How do you feel about this war?" "Why are you joining?" "Do you really think that's a good idea?" "What do you hope to accomplish?" "Are you going to be in the war?" I...I just don't know. And I just wish everyone would leave me alone about it. I just don't get why no one seems to understand that I just don't want to talk about it. Kitty Vertigo March 21, 2003 4:49PM I have a great idea! They should make a reality show about being a soldier in the war! Oh wait. Then the news would sue us. They have already copyrighted "war" and "soldier". Crossed Reality March 21, 2003 4:29PM Also in the middle of all of this war coverage, a brown out killed Sheba's uptime streak. 9 weeks and a handful of hours later, she is currently powered down, 'resting'. Crossed Reality March 21, 2003 4:43AM And in the middle of all of this, the GameSpot Wind Waker review (the only decent online source) hits. I didn't read the text, because I don't want to know that much...but the score says "Yay." If only we weren't at war, I would be more excited and probably jumping for joy. Instead...feh...where's the 7th Cavalry now anyway? How close to Baghdad? Fucking desert all looks the same *stares at CNN* Crossed Reality March 21, 2003 3:07AM Even in times of war you can have some ironic humour. Remember that episode of the Simpsons where the tank runs over the Wright Brothers' plane, and the officer pops out and says "Sorry, we don't usually drive these in the Air Force!". I'm not going to explain it, but here is a quote from CNN: "I'm not sure if you can see it, but in the distance there is an armoured vehicle with about four antennas. It is a Cavalry vehicle, but the crew is entirely Air Force..." Crossed Reality March 21, 2003 1:28AM Actually, I meant WSB, not WCHK. I thought WCHK was AM 750, but it's AM 1290. Crossed Reality March 21, 2003 1:25AM Still watching. I found out WCHK here in Canton is airing the audio version of the CNN broadcast on the radio, so I've left my old portable walkman with AM/FM capability in the bathroom so that I never ever have to leave coverage, except for when I get so tired I pass out for a few minutes. I think it's the first time I've ever listened to AM radio of my own free will. Crossed Reality March 20, 2003 5:37PM Too...much...CNN....brain.....hurts....can't....stop....watching ..war...coverage... Crossed Reality March 19, 2003 11:13PM Let me also say that the time has come to stop being funny, temporarily. Quit reading random websites and turn on CNN, or Fox News, or whichever brand you prefer. I would suggest either CNN or BBC World. When the war ends, then, maybe, I can get back to writing the features that create snickers. Not that I've been doing much of that lately anyway. But, hey, I have an excuse! ...of sorts! Crossed Reality March 19, 2003 11:10PM Who would have thought I would live to see two Gulf Wars? Here we go. Bring it on. Crossed Reality March 19, 2003 1:05PM There is a Feature up, j0. ZenZagg March 18, 2003 11:51PM This is only a test. Subjects may experience momentary discomfort while viewing the Barbasol. Please do not adjust your sets, this is only a test. Crossed Reality March 18, 2003 6:58PM Tony Blair is my hero. Britain is going to war, Parliament voted with a majority of 412 to 149. Yee-haw! Features? You want features? I'm enjoying my mini-break from writing, but you'll get something either tonight or tomorrow, and more often from then on. At least until the Wind Waker comes out. I'm taking at least a month off from writing before going back to edit A Man on a Hill. Once I've done the first round of editing, I'll determine if a second is needed. If one isn't, then I'll begin the magical process of looking for an agent to sign me on. And what do you do while you're looking for an agent? You write your next book, of course. I'm serious. It allows you to go "They don't like that one? Hah! Wait until they see what I'm cooking up now! INFIDELS!" Or something similar. And there you go, that's my writing schedule. I want to be done with the second editing set before I depart for Italy, at the very latest. That would be July 4th. While I'm in Italy I'll start work on the Eternal City with my free time, most likely. Or, if I finish WELL before then, I might start searching for an agent before I leave for Italy...although not being able to get mail or most phone calls for five weeks would seriously stifle that effort. ZenZagg March 17, 2003 7:18PM Oops, that was kind of ironic considering I was talking about clones. C'est la vie! :D ZenZagg March 17, 2003 7:07PM Gulf Wars: Attack Of The Clones Coming To A Strategic Theatre Near You. ZenZagg March 17, 2003 7:07PM Gulf Wars: Attack Of The Clones Coming To A Strategic Theatre Near You. Crossed Reality March 17, 2003 6:07PM I paid $1.59 for gas this morning. At least, now that we're definately going to war, gas prices will go back down soon. Something funny happened while I was getting gas, actually. I looked over on my way inside to pay and saw a tanker trunk filling up with diesel, but I didn't think much of it. Then, when I went back out, I saw it was a BP truck, and started laughing inside my head. Why? Because I was filling up at an Amoco station, and so was he...despite there being a BP station just across the street. Ah, irony. Samantha wasn't at work today. Boo hiss Sam, boo hiss :( I a'had somethings to give yas. So, we're going to war. I'm tempted to write down all of my thoughts on the subject in a Juxtapositions article. I think I'll refrain though. In short, I'm not happy with how we're doing it, but I think we're making the right decision...just with the wrong support. One of my professors used the world "Specificity" today. I nearly died. It's a word, but not one that you hear all that often :) Kitty Vertigo March 17, 2003 6:03AM I look funny naked. Crossed Reality March 16, 2003 6:18PM Finished length: 75,077 words. Anyone else laughing at the fact that I said it would be between 70,000 and 80,000? It'll probably pick up a few more words when I edit and revise it in a little bit. Crossed Reality March 16, 2003 5:18PM Holy Shit. It is done. The first draft of A Man on a Hill is done! Now I just have to put it away for at least a month, before I can start editing it... Crossed Reality March 16, 2003 3:37PM Ah-uh-ah-uh-ah-uh-ah-uh!!! Or something. So, like, I'm leaving ya for a few hours now...because I'm going to go finish my novel. Yep. Ya heard me. Today I shalt finish my first draft. Whoah. Hanging out with Travis and Laurie was fun last night. First time I had hung out all the way till dawn with people in awhile. Travis took some pictures, so we might have some shots of Laurie on the site soon. Whoo! I'm amazed at how well my new personality recovers its moods. I'm chip-fucking-ipper again. They'll never see I'll never be I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger Burning deep inside of me ...I'm going to keep going until I've quoted every single song by that band on this website. Kitty Vertigo March 16, 2003 1:47AM Yeah. Thats right. Go track down Travis and Laurie. Get everyone together to hang out. Everyone, that is, except me. It makes me sad that I cannot be with all of you. I feel like I'm missing something. Yet, I know that even if I were to leave for Georgia, I would miss some people and things here. I guess what I'm trying to say is, we are always leaving things behind, so appreciate it while it lasts. I suppose I will placate myself by watching Junkyard Wars. Meow! Crossed Reality March 15, 2003 1:40PM Long lost words whisper slowly to me Still can't find what keeps me here When all this time I've been so hollow inside I know you're still there Watching me Wanting me I can feel you pull me down Fearing you Loving you I won't let you pull me down Hunting you, I can smell you...alive Your heart pounding in my head Watching me Wanting me I can feel you pull me down Saving me Raping me Watching me ----------------- Have you ever noticed those ultra bouncy banner ads? My banner-ad blindspot is pretty effective, but once in awhile one will sneak through. This one was flying about like it was having a seizure. And the purpose of it all? "DO YOU KNOW YOUR COMPUTER CLOCK MAY BE INACCURATE?!?!" ...GOOD GOD NO! That's always been my worst fear! What can I do about it, anonymous graphic on a webpage? Shit, people are stupid :) Now, time to track down Travis and Laurie... Crossed Reality March 15, 2003 12:50AM The feature is up. I am furious yellow. Crossed Reality March 15, 2003 12:13AM Graaaaaah. Fucking random busy-ness. Hold on, I'm just going to put this Picasso feature up with two comics. Kitty Vertigo March 14, 2003 8:16PM Happy Pi Day! I just fixed my laptop! Yay for spring break! Too bad it ends soon. Oh well. Meow! Crossed Reality March 14, 2003 2:23PM Now there's a lego character that belongs in every collection. Lego Graeme! Crossed Reality March 14, 2003 3:36AM I'm sorry. I wasn't expecting to work this long. But I don't really regret it. I can't update tonight because I'm about four and a half seconds from passing out. But since the feature is three-fourths done, you'll get it tomorrow, before I go hang out with Sam and Lucas. I wrote 4,400 words tonight. I've only beaten that output on my novel once, when I topped 5,000. I'm two chapters and less than 10,000 words away from finishing. Think about that, and look at this: I can't believe I've written something that long. Crossed Reality March 14, 2003 12:19AM When you start dealing with 500k+ of pure text, Word starts to get noticeably unstable. Crossed Reality March 13, 2003 11:36PM On a major novel-writing binge. May cross 70,000 words tonight. That'll put me in spitting-distance of the end. I'll update Jux (as a March 13th feature) as soon as I'm done for the night. Tomorrow I'm going to see Willard and MAYBE a play at my old high school, even though I hate the idea of supporting the drama department in its current form. It was so much better when I was there. Sigh. Still, it's not the fault of the students...for the most part. Saturday I'm supposed to be hanging out with Zen, I think...hmm Monday spring break ends. Faverhis.fjad.j Oh well. Back to the salt mines. Crossed Reality March 13, 2003 3:05PM So, it appears that the person who kidnapped Elizabeth Smart stopped over in Atlanta with her at some point. Isn't that nice. Now I feel bad for not, like, looking for her :| Crossed Reality March 12, 2003 11:27PM I finished two strips of a Picasso feature, but I want to do a third. Shunting everything to tomorrow as such. Crossed Reality March 12, 2003 9:18PM We demand more asbestos! MORE ASBESTOS! MORE ASBESTOS! MORE ASBESTOS! MORE ASBESTOS! MORE ASBESTOS! MORE ASBESTOS! MORE ASBESTOS! MORE ASBESTOS! MORE ASBESTOS! MORE ASBESTOS! Crossed Reality March 12, 2003 1:24AM I know it's a bit late, but I'm posting this feature as if it went up Tuesday. Because I consider it to have. Eat it! :P I'm going to do another 'Great Moments' tomorrow, most likely. And now, back to Simpsons DVDs, leaving you with...RANDOM SONG LYRICS! i believe in you i'll give up everything just to find you i have to be with you to live to breathe you're taking over me Crossed Reality March 11, 2003 4:17AM I never, ever cease to be amused by the Simpsons. "Wanna go to the prom with me?" "Good GOD no!" "Well put." Crossed Reality March 11, 2003 3:55AM The feature went up a few hours ago, I just didn't bother to tell you...but plenty of people read it anyway. Good for them! I have no idea why we did that. Travis's mom's house was known to cause paranoid delusions that would make people on LSD blush. Look for another in the series tomorrow...maybe I can even convince Travis to write it ;) Crossed Reality March 10, 2003 9:18PM Working on a feature for the night. It's going to be a series of features, actually. Crossed Reality March 9, 2003 5:39PM It was between 70 and 73 all day today. What's the date? March 9th? This is why I love Georgia :D Crossed Reality March 8, 2003 9:12PM Sweet Enola Gay I have a lot of shit going on. I'll get back to you soon, but I don't have much Jux time until Monday night (yes, despite the fact that I'm on Spring Break). I'll swing by tomorrow and try to do a feature anyway though. Maybe. I'm currently in a room with my entire family writing this on my laptop. My sister is talking to my dog like it's a baby. The result is disturbing. Athena Falconess March 7, 2003 8:54PM I got my car back! I got my car back! Whoo-hoo! Yeah! I missed ya baby. *does little dance* Whoo! Crossed Reality March 7, 2003 1:21PM I've just been invited to join one or more of KSU's 22 honor societies. But do I want to? I'm not sure... Kitty Vertigo March 7, 2003 1:23AM Just so everone knows, I don't exist. Meow. Crossed Reality March 6, 2003 11:28PM You'll get a feahchur or two tomorrow. I was going to do something tonight, but I was distracted by writing about a dead guy. Sorry. Oh, and work. Some middle schooler who had to write a report kept using me as a dictionary and thesaurus. Kid: What's another word for injuries? Graeme: Wounds. Kid: How do you spell notorious? Graeme: *writes it on a sheet of paper* Kid: What's another word for achievements? Graeme: Accomplishments. Kid: What's this word? Graeme: Attributes. *gives definition* It was fun. Hannah (one of those Lair of Chaos people...the hot one Kenny doesn't know he's after) had to help him out too. I felt all parenty and useful. Crossed Reality March 6, 2003 4:28PM Feature tonight? Ask your freakin` 8-ball! *shakes* All signs point to...Trenton, New Jersey. What the fuck? I knew I shouldn't have bought this off that hobo at the MARTA station. God damnit. Crossed Reality March 6, 2003 12:06PM One...two...three.... SPRING BREAK WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Ah, that felt good. ZenZagg March 6, 2003 9:34AM ROFL. ;) Athena Falconess March 6, 2003 12:39AM For those that are squemish, please read no further. And an added note to Kenny: I'm so so sorry. ledtreece: I love his features ledtreece: They are just funny to me AthenaFalconess: he wants me to reiterate to you that he's straight though ledtreece: AAwwww! ledtreece: =( ledtreece: That is my only response. AthenaFalconess: well, he lives in PA anyway AthenaFalconess: it's not like anything would've been able to happen between the two of you ledtreece: I can always dream AthenaFalconess: do you mind if i post this convo on the site? ledtreece: I find it to be truthful and great ledtreece: And he's sexy! ledtreece: =D! ledtreece: I want him to know that ledtreece: And that I want him!AthenaFalconess: it will definitely go up on the site then ledtreece: I wonder if he likes maple syrup though. =\ AthenaFalconess: b/c it's just too damn funny AthenaFalconess:...er...why do you want to know that? ledtreece: Cuz no matter how much you lick it it never seems to come completely off. ledtreece: =D! AthenaFalconess: oh dear God!!! AthenaFalconess: i knew better than to ask that question I'm going to go curl up in the fetal position now. Crossed Reality March 5, 2003 11:18PM Have you ever looked in the mirror and gone "Wow, I look like myself today!"? I just did. I don't look like me as often as I probably should. Crossed Reality March 5, 2003 5:24PM When he finishes that, we're throwing him a party and electing him god! Kitty Vertigo March 5, 2003 5:06PM Hi everyone! For some reason I am in a super happy mood today, so you are going to have a superfluous amount of happy fun yayful adjectives today! I really don't have anything important to say except that spring break is in a few days, and I have a test in 2 hours on mathematical induction, strong induction, and basic set theory. Fun stuff! But look over there! It is me! Where? Ok, I'm confused now. Anyways, I am deeply entrenched in work on an automated feature poster. Once this baby is finished then there will hardly ever be a reason to hand-edit html, unless its something that is not a feature or news post. I suppose there is a lot left to do. It'll all get done someday. I'm only one Kitty! AHHHH!!! Meow! Crossed Reality March 5, 2003 2:13PM Car salesmen are amazingly quick workers. Crossed Reality March 4, 2003 1:14PM Further on that, on the subject of covers. BMG: Whoever designed the Fallen disc needs a raise. Dreamworks: The man resposible for the laughable cover of The Ring? Fire him. Quickly. I suspect a sales increase will follow. Crossed Reality March 4, 2003 12:58PM Just picked up The Ring and the new Evanescence album. I do so love getting things on release days. Crossed Reality March 3, 2003 9:34PM I'm about to upload the new feature for the night, j0. Look for it in just a second. Crossed Reality March 3, 2003 1:20PM If you use netspeak for any reason, you are going to Hell or New Jersey, whichever you believe in. 'Nuff said. ZenZagg March 3, 2003 1:00PM *AHEM!* *Cough* *cough* This started out as a joke, but it's starting to look very marketable. The result is a largely sleep-deprived work force which, according to the National Commission on Sleep Disorders, is causing decreased productivity and accidents at work to the cost of $150 billion a year. $150 billion! ZenZagg March 3, 2003 12:51PM Addendum: I think I would call it something witty like "The 41st Wink" :D ZenZagg March 3, 2003 12:49PM I was talking with Sara (my girlfriend) on the phone and we were both discussing our collective desires to go home and sleep when the entrepreneurial neurons started firing. They have all of these little shops and spas and restaurants that cater to corporate/industrial culture, but I think I may have discovered a need that is not currently being met by the current suite of businesses out there. I was sitting at my desk, wishing I had some sort of portable alarm clock so I could take a refreshing afternoon nap on my lunch hour in my car, because sometimes you are so worn out, a simple lunch break just wont cut it. And then it hit me, why not start a business that has perhaps 10 REALLY comfortable (like, bed and breakfast cozy) beds in insulated, soundproof rooms. They would even have one of those inane radio/noise generator machines if someone desired to use it. People could come in, pay a flat fee for 30-60 minutes of down time, and just take a refreshing powernap. A preset alarm gently wakes the patron up and alerts the clerk at the booth to make sure the patron gets out in a timely fashion so the next one can come in and nap. I would so invest in one of these places. In fact, I would be a regular customer. Think about it, people that once crawled through the last leg of the afternoon, all dragged down slumped into their recliners at the end of the day could instead finish out the day rejuvenated and with energy to put out towards their families and friends when they get home. I originally hesitated posting this idea, but then I figured anyone attempting to pull this off and actually make money would have my blessing. Sara did mention the problem of having to change all the bedclothes out, but perhaps there could be a cleaning staff cycling out the sheets in a separate (also soundproof) laundry room. I dont know how many of our readership works enough to warrant this kind of service; but, wouldn't it be cool? Athena Falconess March 2, 2003 11:52PM Well, I'm fully a brunette now. Yep, not a blond strand on this head. It's going to take a lot of getting used to. Especially since I really liked my blond tresses, but I have to do this for the army. Not because they really force you to, but you can't dye your hair while you're at basic so if I had kept my blond I would've had some nasty roots by the time basic was over. *looks at hair*....*sniff* I miss it already. Crossed Reality March 2, 2003 6:28PM I love my CD/MP3 collection. It's so expansive and essentially random that occassionally I'll just put the thing on shuffle (MP3s only, even a 51 cd changer isn't enough to properly randomize my CD collection) or just go visually diving through it to see what turns up that I've forgotten about. The song "Metro" that regrettably never showed up on a System of a Down album showed up recently, as did, of all things, the fact that I own an Ace of Base CD. Usually my rediscovered finds languish and eventually go back to gathering dust after a few days of novelty, but others can hang around for awhile and even lead to me buying more albums by the artist. This happened with Machine Head and Adema most notably, where an album that bought and them promply found something more immediately interesting came back to actually stick around about a year after I got it in the first place. What does this mean? It means that that Seether CD might get lots of play in...2004... I have an idea for a Picasso feature. Would you folkses care all that much if I did three in a row, of some sort? My novel is dangerously close to 60,000 words. That's a scary number to me. Three times longer than anything I've ever written before. And growing. I keep expecting to look at it one day and find out that I've just written the same gibberish over and over and, up until now, my conveniently insane mind had turned it into words of the plot I was writing! And now that it's gone, I can't remember what it was! When I do dream (not often) and when there are people I know in these dreams (even less often), the people in them end up swapping faces as often as not. Like, Girl X will be in the body of Girl Y but obviously be Girl X, and will refer to herself by Girl X's name. All of my dreams are lucid, though, so if it starts to bother me I can just shunt them back home again. Happens to the guys too. Pets seems to be immune. Not enough hard core bands have female lead singers. This trend seems to be reversing, but not fast enough. I hate pointless growling, and, luckily, this is less of a problem with girls singing vocals. This news post is officially 900% longer than I meant for it to be. Crossed Reality March 2, 2003 3:15PM Someone save my from myself... Or, you know, that guy in the corner with the knife. Whichever would be the most convenient for you. Crossed Reality March 1, 2003 7:20PM There's a new Picasso feature online. We are pleased to announce this to you as if it mattered. Before you die, you see everyone hugging. Athena Falconess March 1, 2003 2:07PM CR, I could call you many things, but well-adjusted will NEVER be one of them. Crossed Reality March 1, 2003 1:57PM Jesus Christ, am I the only one that's been well adjusted lately? Do you realize how crazy that is? Athena Falconess March 1, 2003 3:06AM Well, everyone at Jux knows what my issues are. I'm not going to discuss it here because it's intensely personal, but I thought I should explain my absense. I wasn't going to leave the site until April 17, but I fear it will be before then. It seems like I'm constantly going on sabbatical and that's not fair, but such is life. Trust me, I'm not thinking life is very fair at the moment either. Crossed Reality February 28, 2003 9:30PM This movie is out on DVD Tuesday, and the world will be a happier, creepier place! Crossed Reality February 28, 2003 2:35PM ...do you realize how many really long freakin` news items we had yesterday? Dizam! Crossed Reality February 28, 2003 12:34PM Look at me! PETA seems to miss the part of "supporting a cause" that says that you're supposed to make people like you. Crossed Reality February 28, 2003 1:49AM Random Jux Entente Personality Quiz That Has No Result: Are you a virgin? Do you know the lyrics to Closer? Who do you think, of the people on Jux, is the 'darkest'? Who do you think, of the people on Jux, is the most fucked up? Have you ever injured an animal that had a name? What's a nubian? How many people have you kissed in your lifetime? Will you end up rich? Is this why you dragged my away from my cartoons? Have you ever loved another human being, despite the fact that you know you shouldn't? Do you have a martyr complex? Have you ever traveled a mile in a car in 30 seconds or less, while driving it? Is snow neat, or irritating? Cats, dogs, or reptiles? Does Graeme bitch too much? Does Travis bitch too much? Does Kenny exist? Is Laurie hot? Could Picasso stand to lose a few pounds? Have you ever seen the movie Pirates of Silicon Valley? Did it make you want to work at Apple in the 80s? Do you have any siblings? Do they like you? Do you love your family? Is there something about you that no one knows? Is there something about you that you wish no one knew? Does the word Entropy turn you on? Is the majority of your clothing best described as "Greyscale"? Color, colour, or other? Legs, chest, what? Is your name spelled funny? Do you consider yourself intelligent? Are you intelligent? What does E=MC^2 mean? Have you ever bought anything related to pop music? Have you ever seen a 'teen movie'? Have you ever taken a more pointless quiz? Crossed Reality February 28, 2003 1:25AM Picasso feature up. Pretend I'm not lying about the date. (lyrics follow) i am the voice inside your head (and i control you) i am the lover in your bed (and i control you) i am the sex that you provide (and i control you) i am the hate you try to hide (and i control you) i take you where you want to go i give you all you need to know i drag you down i use you up mr self destruct i speak religion's message clear (and i control you) i am denial guilt and fear (and i control you) i am the prayers of the naive (and i control you) i am the lie that you believe (and i control you) i take you where you want to go i give you all you need to know i drag you down i use you up mr self destruct you let me you do this to you (i am an exit) you let me you do this to you (i am an exit) you let me you do this to you (i am an exit) you let me you do this to you (i am an exit) you let me you do this to you (i am an exit) you let me you do this to you (i am an exit) you let me you do this to you (i am an exit) you let me you do this to you (i am an exit) i am the needle in your vein i am the high you can't sustain i am the pusher i'm a whore i am the need you have for more i am the bullet in the gun (and i control you) i am the truth from which you run (and i control you) i am the silencing machine (and i control you) i am the end of all your dreams (and i control you) i take you where you want to go i give you all you need to know i drag you down i use you up mr self destruct i take you where you want to go i give you all you need to know i drag you down i use you up mr self destruct ----- I listen to scary stuff when I'm happy, don't I? Go Nine Inch Nails, go! Crossed Reality February 27, 2003 7:42PM Set your long newspost goggles to "Medium". Let's do this in a bullet list of "Things Graeme Is Thinking About." 1) I'm going to try to do a Picasso feature tonight, just because it's been awhile since we've had a new feature. I can get you a list of people you can blame for that, if you like. I had to work every weekend in February while doing projects for classes. But February doesn't have another weekend in it, does it? *beam* 2) To bring this up again from the post below, Mr. Rogers is dead :( 3) Am I evil? I don't think so. Some people do. I can be mean, but I can also be sweet. Really it just depends on the me you know. If I like you, I probably won't call you a worthless cuntrag, nor will I seek to make your life a living hell. In fact, I might just give you money, help you move, kill someone who beat the shit out of you, or any other nice and friendly things. 4) Of course, all of that depends on how you know me. There are a lot of ways, I guess. Tons of little people who flit in and out of life know me mostly as stage dressing. S'okay, they're just extras anyway. 5) One of the old ways I used to judge how well a person knew me was by how much they knew about me. I grew out of that means for comparison, basically because it's pretty damn easy to know just about everything about me. I don't have many secrets, and anything I choose not to tell you is definately for your own good. And I'll tell you eventually anyway. I'm good at keeping other people's secrets, horrible at keeping my own. The only real skeleton-in-closet type dealie I have is even known by a few people, although I'm not sure how many. I told my ex-girlfriend Ryann, even though I hadn't planned to tell anyone, ever. I felt bad, like I was being dishonest somehow. Funny in retrospect, now. Damn that was a long time ago. I have no clue if she's told anyone else. She did hate me for a nice, long time...but I don't know if she ever crossed the line into "vengeful." Doesn't really seem like her, somehow. The only other person I told was Rebecca, because I hated Ryann fo a nice long time too, and it made me mad that she was the only person that knew that about me, so I told Rebecca. Has she told anyone? Doubtful...the only people she could talk to about it would end up revealing it in some way to me REAL damn fast. 7) I hate the number 6, so I skipped it. 8) I should probably let Samantha and Travis know what the hell I'm talking about in 5, but I don't really think I can. They by all means deserve it, I suppose...but times change. Maybe I can't afford to be as open as I used to be. 9) Depressing songs make me happy, happy songs depress me. 10) I'm really fucking sick of tax season. *shakes fist at patrons* 11) The number 11 is responsible for the crop circles in Mexico. Crossed Reality February 27, 2003 10:54AM Mr Rogers is dead! :-O Athena Falconess February 26, 2003 10:33PM Well, I sent Kenny a pic of me. He said he'd try to do a drawing of me, but he's really busy now so I don't know when it'll be up. When it goes up though at least you'll have some semblance of an idea of what I look like. If you care anyway. Crossed Reality February 26, 2003 9:25PM In the immortal words of myself: "Fuck that shit." I ended up with some very interesting still images for a feature that made no sense when strung together and basically would have been pointless to compile. So I'm not going to bother. The staff pages still show "Downloads" instead of "Link Farm". Why? Because I'm lazy and those things are just there for show anyway. Besides, the links on the staff pages don't even work. And you'll never even SEE them, so what do you care? Yeah, thought so. Just keep your opinions to yourself, in your oversized pants, you skirt wearing nazi punk overload democratic asshole farmer. The Jux Entente: Now with 500% more pointless lapdances! The story of my life mostly involves words, strung together. Crossed Reality February 26, 2003 8:32PM *says something witty, plans a quickie feature for the night, goes to write novel* ZenZagg February 26, 2003 5:17PM Yes, about 3 years awhile. Kenny, I think it's because you did my eyes different than the other two. Crossed Reality February 26, 2003 12:45PM Now we just need giant robots that fight crime...oh, and we need to scream. A lot! ...Travis hasn't looked that baked in awhile...goshen.... Kitty Vertigo February 26, 2003 4:52AM Hi everyone! I know I havn't posted in a while. I have no excuse. I am lame. But I have something exciting a new for you! I drew the Jux crew! Well, everyone except Athena, because I have no idea what she looks like. Anyways, the pics of Zen and CR are based on pics from the photo gallery. Mine was drawn from a mirror. What is the catch you ask? They are ANIME style pictures. Yeah, they are pretty lame. Its better than nothing! Here they are! Awww! I'm so cute! Whoa! Sometimes this guy freaks me out! For some reason my drawing of Zen looks drugged. Stupid Anime Eyes! Crossed Reality February 25, 2003 11:44PM If I post the short essay I'm about to finish writing, would you guys consider that a feature? ...please? Crossed Reality February 24, 2003 9:48PM please take this and run far away far away from me i am tainted the two of us were never meant to be all these pieces and promises and left behinds if only i could see in my nothing you meant everything everything to me gone fading everything and all that could have been could have been ------------- The scary part? I'm in a really good mood, I just love that song :D Crossed Reality February 24, 2003 12:43PM Dear Elliott: Thank you for my wonderful and completely random postcard. That is one gigantic ear of corn. Crossed Reality February 23, 2003 11:16PM Having realized that there would be no feature for you tonight, I decided it would be only fair to tell you something funny...at least slightly funny. Plus it might give you a bit more insight into the things I talk about sometimes. With that note, here are what I have named certain inanimate objects. Sheba = My computer MacSheba = My laptop (iBook) Celes = My car Mephisto = My stress relief cow Clarence = My stuffed buzzard Randall = My stuffed, glow in the dark, wizard bear Charles = The stuffed tiger my sister and mother got for me Gojo = the bead spider Rebecca made for me Kerrigan = The crab keychain from the above Mooby = My stuffed cow (Yes, after that, but spelled differently) Earl = My battlin` saber scarab Freezy = Stuffed snowman Chesterfield = Stuffed, boxing monkey, won from treeloot! Betsy = Not something I own, or have actually named, just what I call the colour copier at work when it angers me. FitzSheba = Name of the currenlty non-existant computer that will replace Sheba in about 10-12 months. Lulu = Secret. *stares at Travis* Terra = Not at all secret, but a long damn story Alexander Octavian = Ditto Crossed Reality February 23, 2003 8:38PM Urge to write ghost story...rising... Crossed Reality February 23, 2003 4:21PM Due to random, unforunate events...features I was planning on doing are currently being delayed. A few quick things: I renew my pledge, first formed two years ago and then reinforced when my father bought one, that no one should be allowed to own a truck in this country unless they prove they need it for work purposes. Final Destination 2 is the best comedy I have seen in awhile. Insider material: FitzSheba might be longer in coming, as a small chance has developed that top-secret purchase "Lulu" might have to be moved forward a year or so. Crossed Reality February 21, 2003 3:27PM I just noticed something very fucking interesting. I've been watching the second Final Fantasy X-2 trailer over and over for the past few days, and, suddenly, I saw something interesting. For a VERY brief shot, you can see that Tidus is in the concert scene. At first I thought it might just be Rikku, but, no, it's definately Tidus. Look for it in the first quarter of the trailer, right after Paine does her thing and kicks someone, he's on the floor. Athena Falconess February 21, 2003 10:41AM Well, I'm going into the army...again. This time I'm going in as a Signal Support Systems Specialist for four years. Not exactly what I wanted, but I'm happy about it. I leave April 17 for basic. So, at that point, I'll be on sabbatical. Wish me luck. ZenZagg February 21, 2003 12:44AM *slumps into chair* Tired... Well, the new feature is basically a product of mine and Graeme's boredom one night. My lap is not only the president, it's also a client. Crossed Reality February 20, 2003 10:56PM Feature up. Zen was supposed to say something about it, but he's not here right now. But I'm sure he'll drop by later with something. ZenZagg February 20, 2003 7:05PM Introducing....The Ultimate Tool In Domestic Canine Behavioral Training: The Super Soaker Max D5000 The Max D stands for Maxiumum Discipline! The dog that once gnawed upon your belongings and urinated upon your carpet shall think twice about such bold actions when you are toting one of these babies. This particular model is light enough for civilian use, yet powerful enough to get the point across. My goal is to end up where I started, being able to keep my door open without mischevous intrusions. I shall not lock myself in here any longer. His dog has trespassed twice tonight only to feel the cold discomfort that disobeying brings. (Perhaps the first time confused her?) She has yet to snoop around in here a third time. Thank you Laramie! Crossed Reality February 20, 2003 1:04PM Yeah, I saw the helicopters. Maybe my car will make it onto the nightly news! Whooo! I'll be the red Grand Am GT with the darwin fish sticker next to the KSU soccer field :| ZenZagg February 20, 2003 12:41PM Luckily I was at work when the motorcade went by. I took an early lunch break to see it, and they had helicopters and police cars blocking off every sidewalk, driveway, and road from here to 575/75. I wonder how much it costs to do that? They had all of the county and some state police transporting the 'cade. I also wonder which, if any, of the 12 large vans, suburbans, and limousines contained Mr. B? Glad I wasn't stuck in the traffic mess :D. Crossed Reality February 20, 2003 12:36PM I just got home. Class ended at 11:40. I was given the wonderful honour of being stuck in traffic trying to turn onto Chastain road, within visible distance of the motorcade procession of none other than President George W. Bush. Oh, I also got stuck in traffic for an equal amount of time this morning thanks to an accident on the same road. Lucky. Me. Crossed Reality February 19, 2003 10:59PM Anyone out there who knows the name of the song in the new Final Fantasy X-2 trailer would be doing me, and gnutella, a huge favour by dropping me a line ;) Crossed Reality February 19, 2003 10:02PM There's a new feature up, oh boy. There's a new feature up, oh boy. Here comes the sun, oh boy. Hair gel so strong it will hold if you're kicked in the head, my god. Athena Falconess February 19, 2003 1:38AM Hey, I don't hate all the holidays. Just the ones that have to do with family togetherness. They make me cringe and curl up into the fetal position. Crossed Reality February 18, 2003 10:05PM Hey, Laurie's new feature is up. She rates the holidays. I disagree with her on almost everything! Athena Falconess February 18, 2003 8:20PM Sorry, I just got in, but I'm working on the feature right now and it should be done shortly. Crossed Reality February 17, 2003 11:04PM No, we haven't forgotten about doing features. Laurie seems to be working on one now, and I don't plan on taking this week off like last one. It's just a matter of being busy. Crossed Reality February 17, 2003 2:27PM I liked faux Spring better than reborn winter. Feh. Crossed Reality February 16, 2003 11:20PM "What about the afterlife? What do you think about that?" My Coke was empty; I roamed to his kitchen to get another one. "I have no idea about the afterlife." "Really? Isn?t that the end-all be-all of religion though?" "Not mine, apparently." I came back into the living room and sat back down. "You?ve really not thought about it at all? That?s sort of weird." "I didn?t say I hadn?t thought about it, Vergil, I said I had no idea about what it might be. It?s certainly not Heaven as most people would like to imagine it." "What makes you so certain of that?" "Because the Christian Heaven would be hell. I want you to imagine a place where you really could have anything you ever wanted, any time of the day. You never get sick, never have to strive for anything, never have to do anything. There?s no conflict. Humans need conflict to survive. At least in the traditional fire and brimstone Hell, you have something to attempt to overcome, no matter how futile the attempts might be. I?d rather burn alive for eternity than be faced with eternal inertia." (Damn iChat for not letting that send) Crossed Reality February 16, 2003 6:43PM I just had an awesome feature idea, but I have homework...phooey. And I still need to do Zero 7. I know, leave me alone. :P Crossed Reality February 16, 2003 11:38AM Amen. Kitty Vertigo February 16, 2003 2:34AM Fuck Athena Falconess February 16, 2003 1:51AM Valentine's Day is just another day we celebrate like any other holiday. So, celebrate it however the fuck you want. Believe it or not, I happen to like being around couples despite the fact that I'm not in one myself. I happen to think they're cute and while I am jealous of the love they show one another I'm also warmed by it. So, if Valentine's Day is just another reason for them to show their love for one another, so be it. And, you know, just about all holidays are just random arbitrary days where we celebrate something. So, just enjoy them. Crossed Reality February 16, 2003 12:56AM You shouldn't ever need reminders, or excuses, that's the point. It's some randomly arbitrary day that serves no purpose. ZenZagg February 16, 2003 12:53AM Well, I figure if you end up not indulging in the commercialism fest that tends to happen on that day, if you just take the day to stop and evaluate just how much that special someone means to you, and how you may have been taking that for granted, then the day stops being something to hate and begins to take on a new meaning. I don't celebrate Valentine's Day because Hallmark and Co. inundates the day with red and pink hearts and chubby archers, I use it as a reminder to remember how much the one I love really means to me, and to act on that--not consumer obligation. So if I seem overly offendingly sappy, or like I am holding it over everyone else's heads, that's not my intention, thats just how I feel. And I know one day everyone here will eventually find someone who they can feel the same things about, too. Oh, and you guys out there reading this, just a little advice: even if you think V-Day is a bunch of commercial nonsense, it's still another excuse to do something special for the one you love, and it doesn't really matter what time of year it is, they still love it when you show them that you really care, and that things haven't degraded into a daily routine. Don't wait for Valentine's Day to do something special, surprise them! You won't regret it. ;) Also, on another note, I don't know if its just because I'm sick and its 1:00 AM, but "haven't" is a very odd looking word; looking at it, I can understand why grammar teachers HATE contractions. Look at it! It's horrid! Crossed Reality February 15, 2003 7:30AM Valentine's Day is either about spending too much money on a holiday invented by people in board rooms, or beating the shit about people who can spend too much money because they have someone to spend it on. I think you have it confused with the other 364 days of the year, Travis. :P ZenZagg February 15, 2003 12:13AM Hey, my Valentine's Day just didnt turn out as planned, it was still good :D. I still got to spend time in the arms of the one I love, and that's what it's all about, right? Plans fall through, but that's ok, I still have other plans... *hands clasp* :P. Athena Falconess February 14, 2003 10:55PM Happy Valentine's Day everyone. I hate this holiday, but it really hasn't treated me too badly this year. No presents, but well, no letter-bombs either and considering some of the people I've dated in the past that was definitely a possibility. Crossed Reality February 14, 2003 10:45PM Well, this Valentine's day wasn't bad at all. Pretty damn good, in fact. Not as good as the one where I actually got a present (although that one drove me damn near CRAZY...story for another day.) Not as bad as Travis's, that's for sure. Sorry man :( Anyway, to celebrate the end of the ultimate love-hate holiday, I have the lyrics to the mp3 that just happens to be playing in Winamp at the moment and that has jack shit nothing to do with the occasion. Enjoy, like I am! Time Just a counter-clockwise in motion Time It requires strength, love, and devotion Time A detention of every person Time Is used to make us free again When we can turn back time, to any time By moving on inside And will we still ask why about the time Or be just fine inside of our minds? Time Grows things older, faster when you find it Time It's wasting away while we spend it Time The reflection of our past with it Time Is used to make things right again When we can turn back time, to any time By moving on inside And will we still ask why about the time Or be just fine inside of our minds? I can see this coming over my mind Cause you're right It's life, my light When we can turn back time, to any time By moving on inside And will we still ask why about the time Or be just fine inside When we can turn back time, to any time By moving on inside And will we still ask why about the time Or be just fine inside of our minds? Our minds Because you're right Inside our minds Minds Kitty Vertigo February 14, 2003 1:40PM Meow! Happy Valentines Day! Most people don't know the true purpose of this day. They think it is a day to express love for one another. I say that is all bullshit created by corporations so they can sell crappy little cards that don't mean shit. The true purpose of Vday is to express your inner darkness. Some people, Graeme and Travis for exampls, don't have any inner darkness. They either have no darkness, Travis, or are externally dark, Graeme. This is not a day for them. For everyone with internal darkness, this is the day for you to express it. Wear black. Celebrate Vday. Meow! Crossed Reality February 14, 2003 1:03PM As you can see, I decided not to take the site down for Valentine's Day in the end. Crossed Reality February 13, 2003 9:48PM ...grue? Athena Falconess February 13, 2003 5:52PM *&^&%#$$#%$#%$! My car is officiallly out of commission. Athena Falconess February 13, 2003 2:11AM Sorry all, I don't see an end to my "sabbatical" anytime soon. Not even that pie chart will convince me. Although it was interesting to see that Travis and I had the same amount of features. Crossed Reality February 12, 2003 10:13PM Fe-a-ture up. Crossed Reality February 12, 2003 1:39PM Actually, I could just count the number of times our sig images appear in text using a simple string search, and then count the old Pre-sig days by hand...I meant the numbers would be eye-searing. We have an ad running on the reborn Staccato now. I donated some money to Shawn's graffiti wall because, well, he needs it, and I think the thing is the best idea EVER. Kitty Vertigo February 12, 2003 12:42PM Either that or a simple script that searches the html file for certain key items that signify a post by each of us, with four accumulators. That wouldn't really require eyes to bleed. But I am lazy and don't feel like writing it. Sucks for you. Meow. Crossed Reality February 12, 2003 8:08AM Doing a Jux Entente news post chart would require eye bleeding, soul searing, pointlessly time consuming... ...it's just not happening ;) Kitty Vertigo February 12, 2003 1:16AM Well at least he didn't do a "Jux Entente News Post" pie chart. Although I am going to predict there will be one soon. If there is, I claim 20% of every newspost posted with my newspost poster. SUCK THAT DR. SUESS! Meow. ZenZagg February 11, 2003 10:34PM We have one thing to learn from this: Graeme has become a giant blue pac-man monstrosity and threatens to swallow us whole unless we find a way to stop him. We are lodged firmly in his statistical maw, I don't know how long our collective strength can hold...THE...PRESSURE! Crossed Reality February 11, 2003 10:29PM Crossed Reality February 11, 2003 2:35PM The new Picasso feature did go up last night, if you noticed. To that I say, hurray for everything! My new issue of Time is labeled "Countdown to War." Sometimes, the buzz lines journalists come up with crack me up, even if the issues aren't funny at all. I have a mental image of a giant sphere/peach/what have you (If you're Georgian, they drop a peach on New Year's) slowly decending a pole out there in the desert, and troops anxiously waiting...figiting....almost there...... Crossed Reality February 10, 2003 1:51PM Today's Little Gamers is hilarious. New Picasso feature tonight for sure, perhaps Zero 7, but I have to work and do a project, so bets are most definately off. Crossed Reality February 9, 2003 9:57PM I-238. I didn't even know about it before, and it's already giving me headaches. Crossed Reality February 9, 2003 7:00PM New Picasso feature is up! Yeeehaw. Crossed Reality February 8, 2003 8:47PM Hmm...*looks at clock* Well, that doesn't look like it's going to work. ;) Crossed Reality February 7, 2003 9:52PM Okay, just so you know, I'm looking to have segment 7 of Zero up tomorrow. Don't hold me to that, though. Athena Falconess February 6, 2003 2:21PM I'm around. Just...um...busy...yeah...sorry. Crossed Reality February 5, 2003 9:50PM There's a new feature up! And less than half an hour after posting it (without telling you, because I'm mean), I changed my mind and added a new product to the store. It's a sticker. With the complete Declaration on it. It is the Best. Sticker. Ever. I'm going to add another new "state" product soon, as well as dual CR Zero mini-poster prints (They'll sell for $3, much cheaper than the posters, which will remain.) I'd like to get more signature-image products, especially some with Bob Martian on them, but I can't at the moment. To create the CR products, I had to entirely recreate my signature in super-ultra-huge format at a much higher dpi. That's why, if you actually compare the two, you'll notice slight differences. I can't do that for the other members of the site. I'd love to get a Bob Martian shirt in there. Maybe I'll talk to Kenny about that. Crossed Reality February 5, 2003 7:53PM I have a question for everyone. Where the hell is Laurie? Crossed Reality February 5, 2003 12:40PM Wow Kenny, that was an old feature. Other news for the day: I got my passport! I can legally leave the country! And it has a holographic Ben Franklin on it! Whooooo! Also, it appears that Staccato is breathing again! Kitty Vertigo February 5, 2003 12:43AM Hi! I have a feature for you. I am sorry. That was cruel. It isn't a new feature. It is an old feature. However, it is still relevant, because I am out of Dr Pepper again. Someone please kill me or give me Dr Pepper. Either works. Please. Meow. ZenZagg February 4, 2003 7:55PM Headcolds SUCK! ;( Kitty Vertigo February 3, 2003 1:07PM I love my church. Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with these people? Is it not good enough just to worship God? These people want to help the church. And how does the church respond to them? "Go to hell!" I say fuck religion. People don't need anyones permission to worship God. They don't need to abide by ridiculous rules of power-tripping Jesus-wannabes. I sure as hell know I don't. Meow. Crossed Reality February 2, 2003 10:44PM There's a new feature online, so let's hear a YAY for that! YAY FOR THAT! The more astute amongst you will go to view it, and then notice something else strange. Yes, that's right, the features page has turned tiny! That's because I moved all the 2002 features into their own archive. I was going to wait until, oh, our anniversary in April to split the years, but the main list was just getting too huge to handle. I've also decided to never, ever edit the Features page in Composer again, no matter how lazy I feel. Looking at some of the source makes me break out in hives with boils on them. Anyway, hopefully the 2003 features page will grow ripe and plump like the 2002 page ended up. And then we'll all be happy! Crossed Reality February 1, 2003 9:26PM It's a painful time to be an American, again. I posted the link to that news story early this morning as soon as I heard. In my mind, I had always imagined Columbia gathering dust in a museum somewhere, being pointed at by school children, laughing at the archaic technology. It was a lot like the U.S.S. Constitution in my mind, I guess, in the respect. And now it's gone. Very suddenly. I barely believed it when someone told me. In fact, I asked if they were kidding. It seemed impossible. All through school, I heard about Challenger, our greatest tragedy in the space program. It seems my children will have another disaster to hear about. I remember where I was September 11th, and I'm sure I'll remember where I was when this hit as well. As someone who loves both history and the future, this pains me greatly. A piece of living history has died today. A moving symbol of America. The space shuttle is one of the most instantly recognizeable facets of America. I offer my deepest sympathies to all of the families of the crew members involved. You realized just how unroutine space flight still is, even as the rest of us forgot. I live in Georgia, as you know. Hopefully I will get to see Discovery, Atlantis or Endeavour rise into the sky again. The next launch there is, I'm heading to Florida. Crossed Reality February 1, 2003 10:12AM Click here, right now *sigh* Crossed Reality January 31, 2003 9:30PM There are two new features online. A new Juxtapositions article that I had no intentions of writing, and the magical miracle that is Zero 6b. Go forth, and read until your eyes are raw and bloody! Crossed Reality January 31, 2003 8:48PM Zero, Segment 6b, is done. I would really like to upload it right now for you to frolick about it as if it was the messiah, which, if you're an African Bushman, it is! But there's a problem. You see, I'm in my Granny's old super-comfy recliner on my laptop, surfing the net via wireless Shebanet! (Those of you not in the know, my Windows/Linux desktop computer is called "Sheba", and my iBook is called "MacSheba", thus, Shebanet!) I've been here since like 2:00pm today. Setting up a wireless network might have been a bad idea. Anyway, I'm going to see if I can use VNC to remotely control my desktop computer successfully enough to update the site, since I don't have any of my tools here and I'm too lazy to download new ones. Did I mention that my room, with my computer, is allllll the way across the house? Such a long way... Kitty Vertigo January 31, 2003 6:40PM I love my church. I so wish I could have that job. Just call me Saint Kenny of the Internet. I will protect you from hackers that try to kill your computer and nosey government agencies that have nothing better to do than look at your computers. Meow. Crossed Reality January 31, 2003 11:35AM The new Picasso feature is up, and its description includes a nice little observation I made while posting it. ZenZagg January 31, 2003 12:38AM Hahahahahahahahaha :D Crossed Reality January 30, 2003 10:35PM I promised a new Picasso feature tonight. And it's finished! However, I would to speak to Zen about it and make sure it's okay that I post it as a feature before I do, a'cause he can be randomly touchy about these things. Anyway, if you want to see it, it's Right Here. Crossed Reality January 30, 2003 9:25PM I've done some quick math. Jux = 2.341 completely insane persons. The fact that Travis is just mildly neurotic pulled down our score a bit, as did the fact that I can still tell reality from fantasy. We're working on making Travis swat at invisible flies, that should bring us up to a nice 2.6 Crossed Reality January 30, 2003 5:42PM It makes perfect sense! This isn't math. You can't mix and match parts to create a whole. And besides, I said they were at least 1/4 insane. I think if you added all of our various mental disorders together, you would get at least one person worthy of being put in the nuthatch. Kitty Vertigo January 30, 2003 3:33PM According to CR, any intelligent person is at least 1/4 insane. Assuming that CR, ZenZagg, Athena and I are all intelligent, that adds up to at least one fully insane person running this site. Does that make sense to you? Me either. The answer is that we are all fully insane. The question is, does that make us 4 times as intelligent than any intelligent person? Meow. Crossed Reality January 30, 2003 2:21PM You're going to have a Picasso feature tonight. Then, tomorrow night, you're most likely going to get Segment 6B of Zero. What's currently up as Segment 6 serves as a very good example of why you should never force yourself to write through writer's block (or a least subject block, I could think of tons of other things to write about.). I'm going to completely rewrite it, and make it work, damnit. Crossed Reality January 30, 2003 8:40AM Fixed the problem some people were having with Zero 6. It had to do with how the file was named. Crossed Reality January 29, 2003 8:38PM As you may or may not have noticed, the Link Farm has already undergone a slight visual change from when it was first posted. This is because Kenny said I could do better, and I'll be damned if I didn't agree with him. I might tweak it a bit more in the days to come. Anyone remember how many times the Features page changed before, oh, June? (3 times) I also fixed a minor error in the page, where I said that Kenny had claimed the "cute one" of the Lair of Chaos. In fact, he claimed the "hot one". I've done the math, and Kenny currently lays claim to at least two dozen females at any given moment, although all rights are up for negotiation should he ever meet Natalie Portman. It's sorta like the United States's stance on Antartica. I've also decided that any intelligent person is at least 1/4 insane. Which explains why this site is possible. Crossed Reality January 29, 2003 5:48PM Where to begin...okay, first, there's a new segment of Zero up. Second, we're launching a new main section, the permanent Link Farm! Do you know what a bitch that was? The main Jux site is now comprised of over 200 separate html files, and I had to change all of them by hand. The Downloads section is dead now, though. Since I did do all of those html files on such short notice, there might be an error or two. If anyone spots one, let me know. I think I got all the kinks out though. Links will be added to the Link Farm by all of us over the next few days, and it will never be really "complete." Right now, there's only four in there. I need to compile my web comic list so it can be listed ;) Third, where the hell did the week go? Son of a...tomorrow's Thursday? Kitty Vertigo January 29, 2003 5:38PM Dr Pepper tastes so good after a day of abstinence. Its not like I was abstaining on purpose. I ran out. So I couldn't drink any. But now I have some so it is all good. Meow. Crossed Reality January 28, 2003 6:15PM Title this post "Whoops". I've been meaning to link to this site for days, but I was waiting to see about creating the new page in the Information section first. I'm going to hold off on that for a few days though, so, here we go. Hey, go here! From what Laurie tells me, most of the readers of this site can't get enough of females they hear about on the internet. In that case, you should follow the link above to the Lair of Chaos. It's a site run by a few friends of mine (and one I'm claiming as a friend because it seems like everyone else I'm friends with knows her, so I might as well pretend to at the moment), all of whom are female. Some impressive art and interesting writings that I've not had nearly enough time to dive into yet. I'm setting up a links page in the Information section. I know it'll be tucked away, but I just can't think of anywhere else to put it (The main navigation is not an option...which reminds me, I need to remove that downloads link. How useless is that?). The Lair of Chaos is one of the sites that will go in it, and I'm sure you can guess at least one other. Crossed Reality January 28, 2003 6:08PM Approx. three tons of Statistics work to be done before tomorrow morning. What does this mean? Depending on how fast I can get it done (I'm at work now, so I can't get started for a few hours at least), you can expect the next Zero segment to be delayed until tomorrow. I may be able to finish it tonight, but I wouldn't count on it. Not by a long shot. Crossed Reality January 28, 2003 1:19PM Microsoft: Vee are sooo smart I'll be back later with more links and general loving good times! Crossed Reality January 27, 2003 9:53PM There's a new Picasso feature online. Tomorrow night, I hope at least, will see the next Zero segment posted. I'll do my best to make it happen. Honest stereotype of oppressed native culture! Oh, and Kenny is an idiot. See below. Crossed Reality January 27, 2003 4:26PM Wuh...hey?!@$?#%@#$^$%^%4 Kitty Vertigo January 27, 2003 1:02PM I am once again reminded of how much I hate librarians. I enter the library to look for a book. This is a fuggin HUGE library, so I approach the desk to ask for assistance. This bitch didn't even try to help me. She just sent me on a quest to find the "Math Library" with vague directions on how to get there. I don't think this "Math Library" even exists! Anyways, since I can't get the math book, I can't do my homework. That is why I am doing a post, because I am bored without any work to do. I still have an hour and a half until class. I'll leave you with this. Librarians suck ass. Every librarian I have ever met was a complete bitch. Librarians should all die and be replaced with artificially intelligent systems. Better, Libraries should all be destroyed and books should be replaced with digital information. It's gonna happen someday, and in my opinion, the sooner the better. Meow. Kitty Vertigo January 26, 2003 10:11PM Well, I wouldn't really call it biting. I may have razor teeth, but I only playfully hold with them. My claws are another matter entirely... Meow. Crossed Reality January 25, 2003 8:57PM As per my usual, once I sink my teeth into something, I don't stop until I've ripped it apart. In that light, the entire Information section has been overhaul for the first time since June! Not only is the photo page updated, I've also tweaked the site creation FAQ to reflect the changing times and added a blurb to the site format info page that mentions the fact that our commentary boxes are hardly ever used. The most heavily updated of all, though, is our FAQ. Every answer has been changed, there are tons more questions, and now they're answered by more than just me! Kitty Vertigo and Athena joined me in creating the new one, and I suspect Zen will have answers to add over the next few days as well. So mosey over there and sit a spell, it's a good read. Crossed Reality January 25, 2003 7:02PM The photo page in the information section has been heavily updated for the first time since June. I'm working on overhauling a few of the other pages there now too. It's been too long. -CR out Crossed Reality January 25, 2003 1:33PM All four features are now online. Oh, and Travis isn't quite correct about the not-biting...Kenny's notorious for that... ZenZagg January 25, 2003 1:03PM Sorry guys, it's all done now. I set my alarm for 6:10 AM just so I could finish it for you, but I must have been pretty conked out because I have no recollection of it going off, and its an obnoxious alarm. Since the whole custody battle scare is over, my brother has been demanding a lot more of my time, as well as my father, so I've been real busy lately. Hey, at least now what was once a passive anticipation for the features, is now a yearning thirst (at least we hope). You will have your reward as soon as Graeme gets it formatted and posted. Oh, and one more thing, do any of you feel the urge to submit any more guest features? Come on, we wont bite! Crossed Reality January 25, 2003 8:34AM Well, Travis hasn't finished his feature yet, so that's why none of them are posted. Sorry. He was supposed to email it to me so I could put it up this morning, but he hasn't yet, so...I don't know. Kitty Vertigo January 24, 2003 5:42PM Damn. I am good looking. Plus, I made a new hat. Meow! Athena Falconess January 24, 2003 4:39PM I love winter and the cold. It would be my favorite season if it weren't for all the holidays associated with it. *sighs* Crossed Reality January 24, 2003 6:13AM It's 8 degrees! 8! Wind gusts to -10! THE SOUTH IS FREEZING TO DEATH! Kitty Vertigo January 24, 2003 12:36AM I am a moron. Allow me to tell you a little story. I went to the bookstore this morning to buy some blank cds. I find them, and notice something unusual about the prices. For $10 I could get 15 blank cds. For $10 I could get 25 blank cds. For $40 I could get 50 blank cds. The choice is obvious. I bought the 25 pack. Later, about 10 minutes ago, I opened them to burn some stuff. I was shocked! There wasn't a cd in that case! Then I read the package and realize that I bought 25 empty cd cases. What a moron! Yes, everybody call me a moron. What is worse is that I was bragging to everyone about how smart I am because I saved $20 on blank cds. I wish I were dead. Meow. Crossed Reality January 23, 2003 8:06PM Well, I'm out for the night. Zen wants to finish his contribution to the quartet, so instead of having three features tonight and one tomorrow in the same theme, tomorrow, you're going to have FOUR new features. Kenny's has been done for days. I'm sorry Kenny, but Travis had to do this dishes :| Crossed Reality January 23, 2003 11:32AM There's snow in Georgia. They closed my university. They closed my library. There's snow in Georgia, I'm listening to music, I'm reading my Bag of Bones, And I'm watching my lawn reappear. There's snow in Georgia, I'm writing my book, A few thousand words today, Fred. There's snow in Georgia, God we're fucking wimps, Not even ice this time. There's snow in Georgia, I can't write poetry, But we're still wimps, And I'm bored. Crossed Reality January 23, 2003 8:30AM Ego Brain...*sings* It's all up to you, Zen, to complete the quartet. Won't you feel bad when three of us post something in unison and you don't? :D Crossed Reality January 22, 2003 1:08PM Hey! That's not true. It's because we have so many exceptions to rules in feature posting that it would be complex as hell. You're the only one that can write one anyway, so, if you're up for it...by all means :P Kitty Vertigo January 22, 2003 12:29PM Meow to all! I was just letting you know that I wrote a feature for you. Oh, and I wrote a feature for you. No that wasn't dijyvoo, I wrote two features! CR will post them eventually. Why don't we have an automated feature poster yet? Oh yeah, thats right. Cause that would take too much power from CR and the entier "heirarchy" of him being on top would tumble under a true democracy(or anarchy, depending on your political views), and we really wouldn't want that would we? I didn't think so. Meow. Crossed Reality January 22, 2003 6:22AM Features are coming! Features are coming! TONIGHT! I swear to God. Okay, in other news...the Jux Entente will be down on February 14th, for the entire day. It'll be up again on the 15th, unless I get arrested for all the violence I'll cause the day before. Crossed Reality January 21, 2003 5:06PM Don't worry guy, I thought it was funny. Crossed Reality January 20, 2003 9:32AM I put up the working version of the massive presidential ratings feature I'm working on so you can have something to laugh at for a bit. I've finally figured out the way I want Segment 6 of Zero to go, so you can expect it probably tomorrow. Won't that be nice? Yep, I thought so. From Safari in MacOS X, this is CR :) Crossed Reality January 19, 2003 6:35PM Oh, Zero. Uhhh, yeah...I've been working on my novel, see...and... It'll come eventually! And now, to end this on a funny note, I have joined the custom ringtone crowd. I am very ashamed. Crossed Reality January 19, 2003 6:34PM Why is it that whenever I get really, really happy, I can always expect a wall around the corner? Motherfucker, hand me my drill, we're going through this bad boy. Crossed Reality January 19, 2003 1:06PM And then the walrus said: Silly customers, trix are for people who aren't poor! Yesterday was a fun filled day. I got a new cell phone to replace my two year old one, and this one is a shiny flip phone with a color screen that can be used as a 115kbps wireless modem, stores more phone numbers than I have friends, and can make bacon! Also applied for my passport. It's easier to get in to the country than it is to get out. Whoahoy. Crossed Reality January 18, 2003 3:11AM I wrote 5,616 words tonight. Words of prose. New record for me. And the old one was set just a few days ago at 4,500. Crossed Reality January 17, 2003 7:24AM No, Zero isn't dead. What happened was a few days ago I went to write the new Zero segment, and ended up writing on my novel all night. So, for the past few days, that's what I've been doing...pushing forward with my novel. I realize it short changes you, but, hey, what can I really do? The other thing delaying Zero is that I might have suddenly decided I wanted the story to go another way. My original plan was for a character to die at the end of the first act, and then the story move forward at a breakneck pace. Instead, I think I'm going to take this down a darker road. Give me another day or so to think it out, and then you'll have another segment online. Once Zero is finished, you can expect me to return to writing funny features. I'm going to have a lot more free time this semester than last, and I plan to use it. Crossed Reality January 15, 2003 11:11PM Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix comes out June 21st. The damn thing is 255,000 words long! While I love long books, I mean...dayum. I'll be lucky if my novel ends up at 80,000 words. Kitty Vertigo January 15, 2003 10:27AM *Start bitching* 5 days I have been away. 5 days in my new home. 5 days is a pretty long time. 5 days Adelphia has put me on hold. 5 days my internet hasn't been working in my apartment, forcing me to use the on-campus computer labs. They are pretty nice actually, but they are not my precious computer. No optical USB mouse. Only a single monitor. No speakers. No Linux. *sigh* Plus, I can't be in here all the time, therefore my internet communication has been drastically limited. *End bitching* Meow. Crossed Reality January 13, 2003 9:53PM Kenny! :D Graeme needs to speak to you ;) Kitty Vertigo January 13, 2003 7:28PM Meow. Holy shit. I have never been so absolutely free in my LIFE. I am serious. Get out of your house right now. Go a few hundred miles away. Live. Be able to go anywhere and do anything. My only regret is having to leave behind Kitty(my car). Meow. Crossed Reality January 12, 2003 8:50PM New Zero segment is up. Athena Falconess January 11, 2003 12:10PM Okay, so I'm not in school this semester and it's damn weird. I'm definitely not used to this. I'm concentrating all my energy into finding a job though. Mainly because I can't stand to not be doing anything. Hell, I didn't even like summer vacations way back when. I even went to school during the summer this past year. So, this is just too weird for me and I don't like it, but I'll just have to deal. Heh, maybe I should ease up on myself every now and then. Unfortunately, I don't know how. Crossed Reality January 10, 2003 6:09PM Here I sit, wondering what the hell is happening to Kenny in September. Graeme's Random Song Of The Day: Sick and angered by my friends Extremely cold and heartless Talkin shit behind my back about me to my friends The source, a jealous passion Towards a spirit stuck in contention and fame Just need some time to myself, again Need to bring back the old days When I was in control of my life Again and again Just endangered with my friends extremely bold and honest I'll be when it comes to me I said I'm sorry but you don't hear me I tried to say that I was sorry to you But you don't think I speak honestly That's ok cause I can move on I'm so sorry No... Kitty Vertigo January 10, 2003 9:07AM Meow to all! I am almost finished packing all my stuff. Tomorrow I am leaving! YAY! It is so happy to be getting away from this town. I will still be in Pennsylvania, but at least I will have more freedom than I currently possess. I won't be completely free until September, but I can wait. Meow! Crossed Reality January 10, 2003 4:24AM I was just thinking of something. You know those orientations for college, where they tell you to look to your left and right, etc, one of you isn't going to be there in a year? Trying to instill in you how hard college is, how most of you don't realize it yet...whatever. Well, I was thinking about that for some random reason...and the person to my right was Laurie (whom I didn't know at the time, long story), and the person to my left was Travis. Neither of which are taking classes this semester. Neither of them have dropped out, either, even if they have lost the HOPE temporarily, I just thought it was damned weird. Crossed Reality January 10, 2003 12:52AM We've gots us a new Zero segment posted. Yeeeeeeeeeee-haw! Crossed Reality January 8, 2003 7:52PM Rare moss ends 130 years of celibacy. Crossed Reality January 8, 2003 5:50PM School's back in. I actually laughed in both of my classes on the first day. Decent professors? I think so! Of course, one of them is my favourite professor from last semester...now then, that's one problem from last semester averted. In a few days I'll figure out if all the people are complete muppets again, and we'll dodge the second bullet...I hope. If not, I have an iBook now, so I can ignore you all! Hah! Take that! Of course, the bright glowing Apple on the back might make them want to talk to me... Crossed Reality January 7, 2003 10:12PM Segment 3 is up, by the way. Enjoy. Crossed Reality January 7, 2003 4:06PM Hey, look here! If anyone is still desperately shopping to get me a last-minute Christmas present, that will do nicely. Crossed Reality January 7, 2003 3:31AM To go with the below. Check it out. Crossed Reality January 7, 2003 3:14AM Whoah. I mean...damn. Crossed Reality January 6, 2003 11:56PM Work continues on 'Segment 3'. From now on I think I'll post them with section titles. Anyway, if I crack down, it'll be posted tonight (after midnight as a January 7th feature). Otherwise expect a slight delay. It's been interesting the number of questions I've been getting, if only because I actually planned to address all of them in the story. Go planning ahead! But this news post isn't over yet. I've been thinking a lot lately of people I miss. For better or worse, the last few years have seen me cut quite a few people out of my life. I miss a few. What interests me is that I don't seem to miss (for the most part) the ones I assumed I would. I miss the other three members of the old Mage group the most of anyone. One of them I've not tried to contact in a long time, one of them...and, anyway, the third one I've been trying to kickstart a friendship with lately. I realize most of you don't know what the hell I'm talking about. The Mage group was something that used to meet once a week to play Mage: The Acension. That's how it started, anyway. Eventually we just started watching movies and goofing off. But, I guess that's not very weird. I loved each of those people in various ways, why shouldn't I miss them? The weird thing has been the people I would expect to miss, but don't. Like the girl I pined after for years, Rebecca. (If you're reading this...uhh....hi?) I just...don't really care much at all. Pleasant to be around if circumstances occur, but she's not a person I would ever go out of my way to see again, most likely. A significant change. Sometimes people can re-enter your life unexpectedly, and make themselves important again. I would love to be friends with one or two members of the Mage group again. Will it ever happen? Eh, probably not. Returning friendships are always random anyway. Like the fact that Kenny is a member of this site. As always, I have no intentions of leaving behind, being left behind by, or outright abandoning any of the people I'm friends with now. I know it'll happen, of course. When I try to think of who I'll still talk to in two years, everything gets all fuzzy. Lauren? Probably not, I fear. Samantha? Almost certainly. I wish restarting an old friendship was as simple as starting a new one is. I'd love to, say, walk into a room and say "Here I am!" Two hours later you're talking about your problems, or cracking up at movies, or whatever the hell you used to do with the person. Sadly, that's no so. So I guess for now I'll keep calling ole` guys and gals, and answering random emails from afar. I wonder what the hell ever happened to Branden Allen, anyway. Crossed Reality January 6, 2003 5:40PM Last night I had a strange dream. I dreamt I had a little sister. Which I do. My sister Erin is two years younger than me. But in this case, I had a a 6-7 year old sister. It was strange. In the dream I took her to get something to eat, and then we went to a pet store to look for a puppy. Goshen, I want children. Crossed Reality January 5, 2003 8:18PM Zero, segment 2, is up. Crossed Reality January 5, 2003 7:42PM If I stay the same, how long will I last? But if I change, will I still be alone and typecast? Crossed Reality January 5, 2003 6:41PM Quote of the day: "You're talking faster than my brain processes language." Crossed Reality January 4, 2003 4:13AM There's a new feature online. It's the first part of the Jux serial story. Not only that, but Kitty also saw fit to update his bio. The next part of the story could arrive as soon as tomorrow, and will most certainly be less than a week from now (unless the start of the new semester really kicks me in the ass). Crossed Reality January 3, 2003 5:54PM My biography has been updated on the Members page. Updated twice, really. It now comes in two flavours, and you have to read them both to get the full story. W00T! Crossed Reality January 3, 2003 3:30AM Hi there invasive people! I'm Graeme Hefner! You can look over there in the members section to know more, including a biography that's horribly out of date! Hey, want to know my address and phone number? EMAIL ME! (Sorry Zen, had to poke a little fun :D) Crossed Reality January 3, 2003 12:50AM There are three new products in the Jux! Store. There's Travis's long belated Cabbage Power shirt, as well as some new posters featuring a (recreation of) my signature image, giant size! Crossed Reality January 2, 2003 5:27PM Whoops! Didn't mean to bump Kenny. Go apartment man! GOOOOO! Crossed Reality January 2, 2003 5:27PM I wish CafePress allowed me to make black t-shirts. I want a black shirt with a giant CR Zero on it, quite badly. I have one in Animal Crossing, and it looks sweet. Kitty Vertigo January 2, 2003 4:19PM Meow! I am happy. I have an apartment. Now I don't have to sleep on random people's couches. Go me! Meow! Crossed Reality January 2, 2003 1:20PM Trying to watch ALL of the bonus material for the Lord of the Rings extended edition is quite a process. Crossed Reality January 2, 2003 12:14AM I'm still working on that large comedic feature I promised awhile ago. But I've been thinking of starting something else. A serial story, just for Jux. On a regular basis (hopefully) new installments would appear. While I'm not sure how good it would be, since the last time I tried anything serialized was my freshman year of high school, and I'm not quite sure of what kind of story to do, I think it would be fun. We'll see if I go through with it. Anyway, I hope to sit down and hack out the rest of that Presidential (oooooh) feature soon. Kitty Vertigo January 1, 2003 1:41AM Meow. Kitties like New Year Parties, because they are late at night. I like parties where you just hang out with the people you know. No drinking. Drinking is not necesary. It is fun just to be with the people you enjoy being with. Same as any other time of the year. Meow. Crossed Reality January 1, 2003 12:38AM So, this is 2003? Feels about the same. ZenZagg December 31, 2002 6:31PM Seeing as 2003 is rapidly approaching...here is a warning: Beware of the Fear-Sensing Killing Machines! Don't say I didn't warn you. Crossed Reality December 31, 2002 2:50PM And so 2002 ends. All I can say good about it is that at least it didn't create any brand-new gaping wounds in my mind. Whee. It's over! Everyone go get drunk. Kitty Vertigo December 31, 2002 3:14AM Meow. Kitties are nocturnal. That means that I am awake during the dark times. I like to be awake during the dark times, because bright things hurt me and are bright. However, peoples sleep while I am awake so the life of a Kitties is lonely. Won't you be my friend? Is anyone awake out there? Meow? Crossed Reality December 30, 2002 9:55PM Discard. Sickness. Helpless. Futile. Failure. Mountain. Crossed Reality December 30, 2002 6:38PM I also know for a fact that there are more than a 'few' of you still out there. Every other website on the planet has shut down for this period, why not us? We'll be back. Promise. As for me definately getting better...Hey! I have a pen from "Write Stix". You can buy 5,000 of these for a penny! Athena Falconess December 30, 2002 4:34PM Well, it's been weird. Graeme's dealing with some shit and to be quite honest, I'm not doing too well myself. While Graeme knows for a fact that he'll get better (let's hope for those few that might actually still visit the page anymore) I have no idea about myself. Only time will tell. If you notice after a few months that you haven't heard from me....well you know what will have happened. Crossed Reality December 30, 2002 4:04PM You're out of luck can't get a piece of me It's all blown up don't ever fuck with me I cannot please you all forever I cannot please you at all (I can feel you coming up behind me) Fuck it! I see you in me Fuck it! I feel you in me Fuck it! I'll heal you in me [Won't you be glad when The Jux Entente is back to it's funny normal self?] Crossed Reality December 30, 2002 12:42PM Hoy. Crossed Reality December 29, 2002 11:58PM CrossedReality: I'm going ravingly insane. CrossedReality: And dying. Laurie: i can't even think anymore CrossedReality: Oooh, can I trade? Laurie: or breathe CrossedReality: Not being able to think would rule. Laurie be's fun! Crossed Reality December 29, 2002 11:47PM The quotes in the new feature cover YEARS of my life. Attempting to associate the overall..."work"...with any one person is an exercise in futility. Crossed Reality December 29, 2002 5:49PM Feature up. Of a sorts. This is CR, signing off. For now. Crossed Reality December 29, 2002 5:11PM Emergency. Break glass. Crossed Reality December 29, 2002 4:44PM Full screen movies, like the metric system and Jesus, are the tools of the devil. Crossed Reality December 29, 2002 4:11PM ...murdeeeeeeer.... Crossed Reality December 29, 2002 2:55PM I-E-A-I-A-I-O! Crossed Reality December 29, 2002 2:23PM I have a chocolate soul. Mmmmm. Crossed Reality December 29, 2002 12:58PM Jimmy Carter is eating peanuts in my basement. Honest injun. Crossed Reality December 28, 2002 11:29PM *rip* I'll fight you, mother fucker. Get out of my head. *tear* I HATE YOU!$%^#$%#$ I HATE YOU BOTH! *rend* I'll kill him. I'll kill him. I'll kill her. *gnaw* IT'S NOT FAIR!! IT'S ME! I'M THE ONE! I'M THE ONE! I'm the one.... I'm the one.......... ...I should be......... Crossed Reality December 28, 2002 12:18AM Sorry for the long delay between news posts. I have a few features coming up soon. I hope. Also, I'm going to rig up a test version of how I hope to overhaul our features page (and create a design that would all feature posting automation), as well a few tweaks to our main news posting format that...I hope...wouldn't be that hard to implement. I'll run them all past the staff first. Maybe have a public demo. But I'm in a shit poor mood at the moment, so that's all you get ;) -Graeme, from his iBook, in his recliner. Crossed Reality December 25, 2002 6:50PM Hello all! I'm online from my shiny new iBook, which is finally, officially mine now. Fixed the nagging networking problem with my cable modem (it doesn't like anything but windows, went through the same thing with Linux), so I can be online now! Gotta go get Netscape to escape this I.E. hell, but other than that, I'm great. I hope you all had wonderful Christmases or Gift Days or whatever. I certainly did. I'm going to try to round up the misfit members of the site soon and write down what all we got, as well as what all we did. A nice chronicle of Christmas 2002. I have a weird plan for a Jux new year that I need to discuss with them as well. Hell, the day's not over yet. Merry Christmas to all! Crossed Reality December 24, 2002 12:46AM My last news post until Christmas day, unless something weird comes up. What do I need to say? First of all, Merry Christmas. Secondly...dear lord stop me before I drive over this cliff. Third...I hooked up a CPU fan as a case exhaust fan. Works pretty well, interestingly enough. Fourth...Errr....this space reserved for later. Crossed Reality December 23, 2002 3:26PM It's up. Love me! Kitty Vertigo December 23, 2002 4:15AM Meow! I made a feature. It is about Christmas. I mailed it to Graeme because we havn't automated the feature thingie and probably never will. Anyways, you will get your feature as soon as he is not lazy, which might not be for a few days, so be patient. I don't actually mean that, it is all just an attempt to motivate him to post it ASAP. Anyways, merry Christmas everyone! Meow! Crossed Reality December 22, 2002 8:43PM You hate me, do ya? After all the love I allowed your mother to give ya? [Merry Christmas quote!] Crossed Reality December 22, 2002 5:09PM And now the auction has closed. Thanks guys :( Crossed Reality December 21, 2002 12:33PM I like to think I'm a generous man. Until I got so preoccupied with the holiday season, I updated this website damn near daily. No asking for donations, nothing. So, all I ask from you is a Christmas gift. Just..one gift. What is it? Well, I'll tell ya... Please, dear lord, someone buy me this book. Please. Please? Crossed Reality December 20, 2002 11:13PM It truly is a wonderful life Well, I'm sad to say it doesn't look like I'm going to finish that big feature I was working on before Christmas. I work the next two days, and then I'm off until well after Christmas. But I have lots of stuff to do Tuesday, and naturally a ton of stuff on Wednesday...so, the only way you'll see that feature finished in time is if absolutely nothing happens Monday. Which doesn't seem likely :( Well, hell, Merry Christmas to all of you! Go catch some Donna Reed and Jimmy Stewart. It'll make you feel good to be alive. Crossed Reality December 19, 2002 11:22PM You think you can beat me? Hah! I think I'll re-enter the damn contest just to shut up that smug bastard. If you want to see the previous winner, I've uploaded it in .png format. The real theme image is a .bmp. Click here to see it. Kitty Vertigo December 19, 2002 3:54PM YAY! NO MORE CLASS! *tries to think of other stuff to say* Uhm... oh.. I got an entry for my wallpaper contest. It was from Graeme. I used it for a week or so, but you could do so much better. Make me a wallpaper and e-mail it to krk159@psu.edu. You know you want to. Don't let Graeme win! Crossed Reality December 18, 2002 11:10PM It looks like both Laurie and Travis are losing the HOPE...sigh. But, there is happiness in the world. Where is it? THIS LINK RIGHT FUCKING HERE Who ever said your government didn't love you? Athena Falconess December 18, 2002 7:42PM Well, it has finally happened. I think I'm having a mental meltdown. It looks like I'm not going to be able to keep my 3.0, which means, I might lose my HOPE. The odd thing is, I'm not sure I care anymore. I did everything I could do with what I had. I just had a stream of sicknesses, the army, and pure bad luck. I just can't take it anymore. So, I've decided to accept fate and give in. I was planning on getting a job anyway so I guess I'll use it to pay for my tuition and books instead of just extra spending money. So, if anyone knows anyone who's looking for a legal assistant in either the Bartow County or Cobb County or even in any areas around there, lemme know. Okay, sorry, I'm done now. Crossed Reality December 18, 2002 12:10PM As some of you may remember, I, like many people this summer, bitched about the designs they pitched to replace the world trade center. Hell, I did it right here. Well, guess what folks? Sometimes, bitching works. Crossed Reality December 16, 2002 2:54PM Boom shiggy shiggy! Work continues on my huge new feature. Lord of the Rings comes out Wednesday. W00t. And, last, but not least...spoon. Crossed Reality December 15, 2002 12:10PM In weird news for the day, I've been reading about water cooling for computers a lot lately... I get the strange urge to hook up ole Sheba that way, shove the radiator in the freezer of my mini-fridge, and overclocking the thing to Hades. Won't do it though, of course. That would be...crazy... Crossed Reality December 15, 2002 10:21AM I just got a funky idea for a new feature. Unfortunately, Christmas is approaching fast, so it will be wait and see as to whether or not it gets done before then. Not that it has anything to do with Christmas, just that I know Jux'ing probably won't exist until after New Years...(although I am planning on forcing everyone to post what they got for Christmas on the site. Hah!) Crossed Reality December 14, 2002 12:53PM Awesome book title: "In God We Trust: All others, pay cash." Crossed Reality December 13, 2002 4:11PM Okay, so, some good news and bad news. Our new feature for the day went up just bare moments after Zen's MUD-inspired news post below, so, in the interest of not bumping it for at least a little while, I neglected to mention it. I'm telling you now, that our second video feature is now online, and it's a bit different from the last...taken with the same crappy webcam though. Alright, so, that's the funny for the day. Here's the not funny. Lauren (Gnome) IM'd today with this little news story, which you can catch in detail here, or in brief from a better source here. I'm sure the shitty campus newspaper will have it in their next edition as well. Why is this being posted on Jux? Well, the accused is a good friend of Lauren's. And when she says he didn't do it, damnit, I believe her. Hell, I met the kid once, and I can't imagine him forcing much of anyone to do anything. So, I present to you the stupid lengths people will go through to get attention. Hoy. [Edit: Please ignore the CGI error that makes it look like Zen spammed away...it's being looked into.] ZenZagg December 13, 2002 4:09PM ALSO... I just learned that the check is 1/3 of the total bonus. I will contain my enthusiasm this time, however hard that may be. Companies who share the wealth are good companies, indeed. ZenZagg December 13, 2002 4:09PM ALSO... I just learned that the check is 1/3 of the total bonus. I will contain my enthusiasm this time, however hard that may be. Companies who share the wealth are good companies, indeed. ZenZagg December 13, 2002 4:09PM ALSO... I just learned that the check is 1/3 of the total bonus. I will contain my enthusiasm this time, however hard that may be. Companies who share the wealth are good companies, indeed. ZenZagg December 13, 2002 12:07PM $840.38... .....@#%@!$^!#$^!!!!!!!!!!! *** ZAdventure Build 2.777 *** [A Greater Supervisor rolls attack: 1d1] *** CRITICAL HIT! *** [Instead of presenting you with another project, Greater Supervisor hands you an envelope.] You have recieved an envelope. [A Greater Supervisor leaves east.] What do you want to do? >inv Your inventory contains: (1) Mysterious Hand-Delivered Envelope >look envelope [You open the envelope, a check is inside.] >read check [As you read the inscription on the check, a feeling of well being overcomes you, your cares seem to melt away (most of them at least).] *** ZenZagg has gained experience! *** Stat Modifier: Stress -5/Eustress +6 >shout "WWNHFHAWAWHAAAAAAHAAAHAHAHA!!!!" [A nearby Cubicle Dweller glances at you briefly.] >consider Cubicle A Cubicle Dweller is unarmed, and likely an easy foe. >shrug You shrug. >CHRISTMAS BONUSES ARE AWESOME!!@#$ I'm sorry but I don't understand what 'CHRISTMAS' means. >KICK ASS! YES! Kick: There is no creature here with the name of 'ASS!'. >GOD ROCKS! I concur. Crossed Reality December 13, 2002 8:29AM And you thought the RIAA was bad. Kitty Vertigo December 12, 2002 9:32PM Hello! I figured it all out. I have a problem. This is a serious problem, and I need you to help me fix it. I need a new wallpaper/background/desktop image, whatever you want to call it. Anyways, kitty commands you to make me a picture. Consider it a Christmas gift, but don't make it christmas themed. If I get any, I will post the one I use in a feature. Maybe it could be a contest-type thing. This is fun. Kitty wallpaper contest Make me a wallpaper Mail it here The one I actually use will win The winner recieves nothing I'll do a little feature saying who the winnder is and such The time limit is whenever, but as soon as this post goes off the bottom it is gone, so don't expect any more info on it. OH! We need a theme... the theme is "Stuff Kitty Likes." Have fun! Meow! Kitty Vertigo December 12, 2002 2:06PM *hiss* I hate you *hiss* Oh wait! Not you! You are too pretty to hate. Hey, wanna come over a little bit later? OH wait... I had a purpose for posting something didn't I? Uhhhhhm.... I think I forgot it. Maybe i was just letting you know I wasn't roadkill and am still living? Anyone know how to decipher brain processessess want to help me out? I am so confused right now. Anyways, Meow. Crossed Reality December 11, 2002 8:37PM My friends are having a very Think Geek Christmas this year. Even those that aren't geeks! I'm also whipping up a Jux Entente holiday stocking sticker packet for the rest of 'em. Bastiches. Crossed Reality December 11, 2002 2:11PM Your new feature is online. Jeez, why do I feel like I'm spoiling you bums. Crossed Reality December 10, 2002 10:46PM Isn't it interesting how you can go from my rambling semi-depressive news updates to "A new feature is up" in just a few days? There simply MUST be a happy medium ;) Crossed Reality December 10, 2002 9:40PM A new feature, up, is. Crossed Reality December 9, 2002 6:49PM That means that I got a 94 on the third worst research paper I have ever written (adjusted for intelligence inflation.) ZenZagg December 9, 2002 11:58AM Graeme requests that I post a news item in lieu of him. It says: "Yay for bullshit!" I don't know either ;D. Crossed Reality December 8, 2002 12:24PM I'm going to see if I can compile enough stuff to write a second "Library people" feature today...while I'm stuck covering for someone in the Children's Department! You wonder why I'm a nihilist? Well, not really, but sorta, and, hurhguhalhlaishflasjdflasjdflasijgirjarigja, go to hell and LEAVE ME ALONE!! I'll kill you! KILL YOU DEAD! Oh, wait, we want traffic here. I love you! COME BACK! God damnit... Crossed Reality December 8, 2002 10:06AM Sometimes, nothing is funnier than real life. Go Milton, GO! Crossed Reality December 7, 2002 7:20PM The sadness has spread to my brain (already did one Wigu reference today, might as well go for broke). Anyway, yeah...probably no feature tomorrow. Go read Hamlet. Tons of places it's free online. Hell, I may even post it here like I did Candide, just for you. That'll be an interesting feature. Crossed Reality December 7, 2002 6:49PM Some days you want to grab the world by the horns and beat it senseless. (Not today, but probably tomorrow) Some days, you just want to curl up in a blanket and read For Whom The Bell Tolls. Crossed Reality December 7, 2002 9:10AM Feature! Crossed Reality December 6, 2002 7:43AM CrossedReality: What the? You updated again? *** Auto-response from Elliott: ROAR!! I am in BED!! CrossedReality: LIAR! CrossedReality: Everyone knows that they don't have beds in Iowa. CrossedReality: You sleep on PILES OF NASTY, DIRTY COAL! CrossedReality: Stuffed with CORN! CrossedReality: Covered with PIG SKIN. CrossedReality: And NAKED WOMEN. [Feature progress: Depends on who I call today!] Crossed Reality December 5, 2002 5:47PM Just because you've gotten new features for the past two days doesn't mean you can get used to constant updates again. I mean, it's still December. Expect extremely flightly...updating...ness. Hell, I didn't even tell you that we had a new feature yesterday, because I'm a wild child! I wrote a story today...an experimental story. It was going to be your feature for the night. But I think it turned out far too personal, and contains some hidden bits that could, quite frankly, damn me. So..NO! HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH Look on the bright side. We've still updated more than any webcomic in existance! Well, not any, but any TWC comic. Because they are lazy. Athena Falconess December 5, 2002 5:23AM Okay, just for the record, I hate the holiday season. I fucking hate it. Why do I hate it so much? Probably because I might as well live with Santa Claus. Every year, my mom decorates the house in what I call "Christmas Overkill." Each year it gets worse. I await the day that she even tries to touch my room. *loads 9mm* Crossed Reality December 4, 2002 7:35AM Holy shit am I in a weird mood. It's happened before, but not in a long time, and rarely even then. It's what I refer to as "Glorious Depression". I'm down at the deepest level, but absolutely whacked-out daisy flinging up in the mind. Seriously, I feel like setting up Grayum's Luv Shak and serving up free drinks to metal music on my front lawn while saving animals, or something. What's even more super-ultra-maxi-astounding ZWEI is that this mood survived me going to sleep. Normally these things end when my forward brain momentum stops even for a second. Of course, thinking about the last time I was in the mood is fucking Sacredly Scarey, so we're not going to be doing THAT, are we? I've gotta to go the SCHOOLY PLACE OF SCHOOLING in a few minutes. And I'll do it with a SMIlING HAT ON MY FACE! Yessir...it seems I've become (temporarily) aware that everything just might be fine... Crossed Reality December 3, 2002 10:32PM The new features are up. Crossed Reality December 3, 2002 7:55PM A few hours of vigorous meditation later, I am once again the sadest flower in the garden, all for you! Two features! YAY! Am I really that down? Nope. But I'll fake it for your benefit. Everything's going to be fine again...in a few years... I think I'm going to go ahead and cut and dye my hair all funky colors and start wearing black all the time again. Crossed Reality December 3, 2002 5:19PM So, I was going to do two features tonight. One was (and is) going to be a Picasso strip...DRAWN BY TOUCH PAD. The other was going to be one of my semi-poetic depressing rambles. Then, damnit, I had to go and get happy. I'll try and bring myself back down in time to retype what I need to for Jux. Otherwise...only one feature. I know how much you love to read my depressing rambles too. They're so happy! Still...karma? Crossed Reality December 3, 2002 7:11AM I'm still brooding. There will be a feature tonight though. Yayful glory! But, to keep you occupied until then, I would like to point out that today's new Wigu is the funniest thing I have ever seen. And by ever, I mean "evar". Check it! SPRING INTO ACTION Crossed Reality December 2, 2002 7:21AM I finished the research paper a few hours ago, so that's yay. You want to hear things that suck, though? Okay, I'll hit you with it. My usual attire is just jeans and a t-shirt. Currently I'm wearing that, two pairs of socks, and one of my old thermal shirts from middleschool/freshman year. It's fucking COLD in Georgia right now. Weirdly so. It's been below freezing every night for two weeks now. That's just not right. And we've not even gotten any snow for our trouble. This is the blowinest winter ever. Crossed Reality December 2, 2002 4:06AM I hate research papers. I really fucking hate research papers. Research papers est nolo. Ever finished one, and realize that it needs to be two pages longer, but you're too good to just bump it from 12 to 13 point font [which is within the guidelines]? Fuck it, Fuck it, Fuck you.....well, except you. Crossed Reality December 1, 2002 4:17AM Radio quote from the late night female DJ: "Flattery will get you everywhere." Crossed Reality November 30, 2002 9:27AM Now then, since I'm at work and away from the neo-high that is OS X Jaguar, allow me to explain a few things. First of all, there won't be a feature tonight or probably tomorrow, since I have a research paper that demands to be finished. After that, we should return to normal around Tuesday, at least until the Christmas season hits. My changing signature image has a lot to do with the soul searching news post I put up a few days ago. I think my old, bleeding star of david represented who I am only as a snap shot in time. My new sig, which is either a zero or a null symbol, depending on its use, is much more complete in its scope. I first used the name "Zero" to describe one of the aspects of my personality years ago in the mid 90's. I'm not going to describe what mixture of my two dominant halves Zero represents, but it's the state I've been in since...well, 2001. Am I happy with this? Not really. I've probably spent more time in this in-between area of my personality over the years than any other. For specifics of why I'm deeply mired in it now...well, you can't get them online. Sorry. The blood, a hold over from my last signature, is relevant in that I don't really like being here. My soul is in constant peril every minute that I spend in this state. At least, that's what I've always assumed... Perhaps I've been wrong. We shall see, soon enough. I guess it's time to use some things to my advantage. Crossed Reality November 29, 2002 9:08AM FUCK NOON! IT'S HERE! Crossed Reality November 29, 2002 8:48AM On FedEx vehicle for delivery CARTERSVILLE GA 11/29/2002 07:59 That's my new iBook. I can get to Cartersville in about 30 minutes or less, so it looks like it's going to be here before noon! Not bad for a laptop that was shipped super saver on Wednesday from Taiwan. I love living in the Atlanta area. There's some mystic vortex (Hartsfield) in this town that opens and stuff just falls through. Oh, and, if you're really up to snuff on our members page, you know that Cartersville is where Athena/Laurie lives...gotta tie this in somehow ;) Crossed Reality November 29, 2002 5:40AM ...and in a first for the Jux Entente, one of the members has changed their signature image. Crossed Reality November 29, 2002 1:28AM Travis: wole screen Travis: *whoe CrossedReality: hahahha Travis: !!!!!! Travis: *whole Sometimes, text conversations are just funny for no real reason... Crossed Reality November 29, 2002 12:59AM Random funny question: Why does Apple's education discount apply towards the iPod? Crossed Reality November 28, 2002 2:35AM Recently I've been asking myself a question a lot. Not one I'm used to posing to myself: What am I? I've always strived to be the best person I could be. This sounds like bullshit, but it's really true. The first major change of this little personal revolution came way back in middle school, when I decided to prove to myself and the world that you could be a fun person without being morally corrupted. From this point on, the emotional world had much more importance to me than the physical world. The major fuel of this decision would become my main problem in years to come. I was born having everything I could ever want. Except someone to share it all with. I became obsessed with love, with relationships, with emotions...and to me, the physical seemed to get in the way of that. You can't completely exclude the physical side of relationships, but the emotional should always come first. As I grew into this system over the years, my sex drive essentially died. All part of the process of self evolution. But am I still advancing? Or have I become stagnant? I can prove that I have evolved my position in life and general knowledge over recent time periods, but I think there's a specific event in time when I stopped becoming a better person. Someone who has a writing credit for this website, but isn't on the Members page, made me realize this. Accidentally. But forcing me to think about something I had hidden from myself...because of pain. I'm trying to move myself forward in evolution again, and to do that, it looks as if I might have to move backwards in time. Just random thoughts from the late night warrior. I don't think I'll ever be the knight in shining armor I want to be. But I have changed my thoughts recently. Instead of thinking have to save someone...maybe it's me that has to be saved. Maybe I'm the one that became lost. Maybe I'm rambling to people who don't even know what the fuck I'm talking about again. Crossed Reality November 27, 2002 10:49PM New feature is up. Who warms the sun? Crossed Reality November 27, 2002 10:37AM How...sad. Crossed Reality November 27, 2002 5:27AM I'm very, very sorry. I've got a report to write today (I've scheduled my use of time to extremes for this holiday), but I'll hopefully be able to hook you up with a feature tonight. I hope. :( Crossed Reality November 25, 2002 12:46PM "I'm sure the European Union will want it as a member, won't they?" Boschi said. That's the funniest thing I've heard all day! It's from this. Crossed Reality November 24, 2002 3:10PM Did you know there's a Moron Air Base in Spain? It's apparently an emergency landing site for the space shuttle. Moron Air Base. Yikes. Kitty Vertigo November 23, 2002 4:24PM I wish I could adequatly describe my evil laughter in words, but I will just say this for now. It is over. Crossed Reality November 23, 2002 4:24PM What a wasted, golden opportunity. Stupid work and sleep combining to make me completely out of it. Don't have a clue what I'm talking about? Me either. Perhaps I'm just conspiring to make you even more confused, and deflect the knowledge that you are without a feature again due to the Jux Holiday Rush(z0r). Or maybe my super secret plans are coming to fruition. Crossed Reality November 22, 2002 4:19AM Elliott Hoffman's birthday is today. Just another year until he starts getting...old. So, I'll trying and get a feature up for you today. I should warn you though, Jux is going to be updating very sporatically from here until 2003. The holidays are upon us, and I revel in the holidays greatly. That doesn't mean you can expect features to dry up completely, just that I'm not going to dedicate myself to having something up every single day for awhile. And, finally, if you haven't bought Metroid Prime yet...well, it is without a doubt the greatest game of this generation. And the best Metroid game ever made. What does that tell you? Crossed Reality November 20, 2002 9:27PM Semester ending. Holiday preparation. Extra work to cover for new staff. Two Metroid games. Crossed Reality is now officially on extended, random vacation. Crossed Reality November 20, 2002 12:41PM Can you blame them? Kitty Vertigo November 19, 2002 8:04PM Well it is official. I have been happy for an entire week. I must be in happy mode. This means that if anyone wants to ask anything of me, they had better hurry up before happy mode is over. My guess is that it will last a few more weeks unless thanksgiving kill it. Anyways, I have a few things to say about the article CR just posted. I love computers, and want to work with computers such as the ones described in that article. So, if anyone has a spare supercomputer laying about that you aren't using, I would gladly accept it as a gift. Just e-mail me and let me know. Meow Crossed Reality November 19, 2002 7:09PM While I may be posting this from work, I can safely say that Metroid Prime is the bee's knees. But, now for what I'm here for. This makes me giggle. Just read the specs for ASCI Purple...the second fastest one they're building. ZenZagg November 19, 2002 1:56PM *Want!* Crossed Reality November 19, 2002 1:09PM Bye! Athena Falconess November 18, 2002 11:54PM Well, I'd do a feature for you fine people, but, unfortunately, I have a sociology paper to write. Plus, I'm sick which really sucks because I don't really have time to be sick. I have a presentation I have to give tomorrow and I have to find some time to meet with my other group members in Anthropology. And I have drill practice with my recruiter on Wednesday, but if I still look and feel the way I do he may tell me to just go home. And did I mention I have an exam on thrus. Ugh. Crossed Reality November 18, 2002 9:46PM The chances of me doing a feature tonight have gone from slim to negative. In fact, I might just take a feature DOWN. I'm that tired. Half an hour of sleep and then running around all day in freezing cold weather will do that to you ;) You still have a few hours for someone else to spring into action, so hold on to prayer. Kitty Vertigo November 18, 2002 8:56PM Well that was scarey. I just spent the last hour or so with my FAMILY. Well, all of my family except my dad, cause he is in New York. But anyways, it is very unusual when my 7 siblings and I are all in the same room at the same time. It makes me wish it were January when I am leaving home forever. They are really annoying. Meow Crossed Reality November 18, 2002 12:33PM It was 24 degrees when I got up this morning. Can you believe that? My damn gas cap froze to the fuel door in the three minutes I was filling my tank today. Crossed Reality November 18, 2002 12:47AM Kenny, a lot of people out there are still wondering what this Lie-Noox is at this point, so I don't think they're going to slight you for installing XP. :P Kitty Vertigo November 17, 2002 11:42PM I have turned to the dark side. I installed WinXP. I am so sorry. But I am going to have to blame my acts on video games. If it weren't for Warcraft III I never would have done it. It's not like i'm not going to use Linux anymore, it's just that I need windows to play Warcraft. Don't hate me. *cries* Oh, btw, sugar cookie dough is really yummy. You should go eat some. Meow Crossed Reality November 17, 2002 9:45PM Yes, we have a feature up. But more important than the silly thing I came up with today is this. Go there, scroll down to Jeff Gerstmann's, and then come back here. That is, if you have any interest in gaming at all. Crossed Reality November 17, 2002 9:16AM A feature tonight? The possiblity is distinct. Crossed Reality November 16, 2002 2:39AM And we have a new feature online, that has nothing to do with traffic offenses. At all. However, it does continue (and likely finish) the other great saga: that of the midget Travis. Kitty Vertigo November 15, 2002 4:51PM Traffic tickets... HAH! I was once arrested. Hand-cuffs were NOT meant to be used that way. Anyways, as a result, I was charge an $800 fine and have to do 35 hours of community service, which i still have 27 hours left to do. Tickets... what wusses. Meow Athena Falconess November 15, 2002 2:52PM Believe it or not, I've never gotten a traffic ticket for anything ever. I keep expecting the fact that I tell everyone that to backlash on me and I start getting tickets every other week. So far, I've been lucky. *Continues to hope and pray* ZenZagg November 15, 2002 12:12PM Ok, now it's time to shake your fists at Graeme, and gnash your teeth too. My court date is on the 25th, I have no inside connections through my family (his dad knows way too many influential people ;)), and my insurance carrier screwed me by not sending my updated cards, so Officer Brown got to write me an additional ticket for no proof of insurance, which means even if I do prove in court that I had insurance on that day, I still get fined. *shakes fist* Lucky *mumble-mumble...* Crossed Reality November 15, 2002 10:29AM The last chapter of the saga of my traffic ticket has drawn to a close. To recap: I was charged with doing 82 in a 65, and fined $150 for it, on October 8th. I was not doing 82 (closer to 75), and the maximum they were allowed to charge me was $125, by state and city law. Now then, the court date that appeared to be written on my ticket was today; November 15th. So, my father (who joined me on this adventure) and I called City Hall this morning to confirm that that's where traffic court was. Well, it is, but not today. The actual date was the 13th. So, I was in trouble. We drove over to City Hall to sort everything out, and I was given a new court date of December 11th, as it looked like November 15th on the ticket to them, as well. Right about this time, both of us upset about wasting days off, my dad decides we should go visit the prosecutor for the city of Canton, who he knows in a round about way. It's a small town, and my father published the city news paper(s) for years, and has lived here all his life, so he knows a few people. So I gathered up my case papers copied from the state code of Georgia, the county code of Cherokee, and the city code of Canton, and off we went. Long story short: not only did he notice they were overcharging me, but it seems that after reviewing the laws, they might have been doing it for quite awhile. My offense was lowered to 75 in a 65, no points on my license! My new fine, which I just paid: $43.75. The people of City Hall were nice, even if they were seeing us for the second time in an hour. It looked like a 15 to the city prosecutor, too. Crossed Reality November 15, 2002 1:56AM Feature's up. I should say that I created all four panels separately. While I always intentionally draw Travis a bit shorter, I didn't realize I'd done it THAT much this time. Needless to say, the real height difference isn't that extreme. ZenZagg November 15, 2002 12:38AM I got a new car!!! Specs: 1999 Silver 4-Door Toyota Corolla 4-speed Automatic Power Everything AM/FM/Tape/CD "Might as well be new because it looks, smells, and drives that way."(TM) 6 year/100,000mile warranty 27,800 miles on purchase Graeme said I paid too much for my Celica, but I got a $2000 credit on trade-in, bringing my car down after financing to about $8000 (and also $3000 below bluebook value on edmunds.com). All of this on my own credit. I am a very happy camper :D. Crossed Reality November 14, 2002 10:25PM No feature from me tonight. I'm in email hell, trying to get everything sorted back out. :( Crossed Reality November 14, 2002 9:40PM Oh crap. Ever suddenly realized you needed to change all your accounts, everywhere, because your email address just died? Yeah, me too. And for some reason I can get the Jux Entente's webmail working but not our POP3. Athena Falconess November 14, 2002 6:41PM Damn straight you should be sorry Graeme, I looked for you so I could see your hair. Well, actually, I only looked for about five minutes, but still you wasted my time you bastard. Hehe, just kidding. I actually had a great day at school today which never happens, but I won't get into it since it would take too long. Anyway, I'm just going to go skipping around now. Bye Bye Kitty Vertigo November 14, 2002 4:19PM Shiney Dr Pepper Cans! This is 2 days in a row that I am in a happyful mood! This probably means that the world is coming to an end. Don't be scared. Don't worry, be HAPPY!! Oh, and I am making good progress with my computer. It almost boots! I'm hungry. Give me food. FINE! I'll go find some myself. Meow Crossed Reality November 14, 2002 4:18PM Quick apology: Sorry I wasn't at school today guys! Athena Falconess November 13, 2002 11:50PM Well, Graeme won't announce my new feature's online, but I will because I'm damn proud of it. So check it out! Athena Falconess November 13, 2002 8:31PM Well, I got back from my first prep class for Basic with my recruiter. I did okay. I pretty much have the positions down. I just have to work on my about-face. I'm the only girl in the class but that's to be expected. It didn't help when the recruiter singled me out personally, although at least it was for a good reason. He was impressed with my initiative and self-discipline which is always a plus in the army. Anyway, I'm still a little uneasy about whether I've made the right decision but I have until March to think about. That can be viewed as both a good and a bad thing, especially since I overthink everything anyway. Crossed Reality November 13, 2002 6:48PM I'm off to get my hair mangled. The entire photo section is about to be out of date! Athena Falconess has a new feature for the night, which I will post as soon as I get back. I likely won't bother with a news post then though, so just keep checking the Features page for updates. ZenZagg November 13, 2002 6:03PM Good news, my car is out of the infirmary, and I am sitting in the Toyota dealership getting a credit check. I have my eye on a 97 Ford mercury tracer for only $4995, less if I can trade in my Celica. I am currently posting via my Danger Hiptop, which is quite handy to have. I suggest getting one for christmas, they are $99 on Amazon.com after rebates. Kitty Vertigo November 13, 2002 5:31PM Good evening. Well it is not too often that I can say this, but today was actually worth it. It's for a very stupid reason too. I didn't get a new game like CR, or anything like that. It is just that today, while I was driving home, the sky was that perfect shade of purple. For some reason, it just put me in a good mood, which makes me happy. Meow =^-.-^= Crossed Reality November 13, 2002 2:35PM Resident Evil Zero is here, and I giggle with glee! While I don't link to this site nearly enough, I think it's safe to say that Penny Arcade is the bestest webcomic ever, and with them adding their voice to the 'Metroid Prime is PERFECT' chorus, I'm even more excited. Still, contrary to the comic for today, you'd think the suit would come off then... Crossed Reality November 13, 2002 12:28AM Testing. Attention please. Whee-hah! Crossed Reality November 12, 2002 11:48PM Three new commentaries up. They're on the spirituality feature, the I work with these people feature, and Kitty's "don't be stupid" Juxtaposition. Almost forgot we did commentaries here, didn't you? Crossed Reality November 12, 2002 10:02PM News from the board room: We've got Bunnies! Crossed Reality November 12, 2002 9:44PM Actually, Zen works less than I do, so that "spends more time at home" comment is officially stricken from the record. ZenZagg November 12, 2002 9:25PM Flame wars are healthy for growing boys and girls. Here we go. Since Graeme was courteous enough to refute my rant, I will return the favor. First of all, I did not go behind anyone's back. I posted my feature on my own because I believe it is the right of any member on this site to post content without having to go through Graeme. We all have accounts (though mine had restricted access for some reason so I had to use the main account), so we should be able to use them. It is true that we do not yet have an automated posting system, and this is the exact reason why I decided to take matters into my own hands. Also, as for Graeme posting the majority of content--he really does have more time to dedicate to it. Recently, I have not even been at my home for any long period of time, and when I am, I am usually sleeping. In constrast, Graeme spends a great deal more time at his personal computer than I do (whether it be for writing, content generation, or doing whatever else he does while at home). Also regarding Graeme being the webmaster and "sole financial support": The agreement was for me and Graeme to split the cost of the web hosting, and that is how it went for a long time, until he just stopped requesting my contributions. It's not like anyone is forcing him to pay for the whole thing, he chose to do that on his own. As to his claim that I never keep my promises, or break deadlines: Everyone else got to set their own pace. I always had my deadlines set for me. I was nto able to just do my own thing until one day I randomly send a feature, as Kenny does. For me, it was always: "Why haven't you made a feature yet?" "You better have a feature done for tonight." "I need a contribution from you by [date]." If I truly had the freedom that others have had, I don't believe that things would be the way they are. I had no option but to set some sort of tentative deadline, because if I didn't, there would be much indignation to be had. And one other thing, pertaining to the quiz example that he cited: I had only learned that he wanted me to do the quizzes at 8pm that night, and right about the time that I loaded the website, I had to eat dinner as well as do some work around the house with my younger brother. I was already feeling under the weather that day, so afterwards I took a rest. I didn't get a chance to get back to the computer until around midnight, when I completed the quizzes and gave my results to Graeme. And if you look at the posting date, he posted his alternate feature around 11:16PM. You'll notice that my news post saying that I had them done was posted at 2:37AM, but that was only because I had just read the feature (which he never did put up my commentary for) and decided some clarification was in order. "[12:41:06AM] ZenZagg: You scored 132, on a scale of 10 to 200. Here's how to interpret your score:" It certainly was nowhere near "Twenty-four hours" before I gave him my quiz results. More like 4. I don't think I'm the one exaggerating things here. Regarding the store: He says that we never made any merchandise for him to put in the store but as I mentioned earlier I had a Cabbage Power shirt that I very much wanted to see in there. This was months ago, so "didnt have time" kind of loses its potency over such a time frame. Thankfully after talking with him today, he said he would finally put it up. I think we should all put some merchandise in the store. It may not seem an important part of the site, but it does produce hard-copy advertising for our site, and I was only concerned that everyone have a part in the design of this merchandise. But it's not that big of a deal, because it's easy to change the products. And finally: The main point of my whole rant was to call to attention the fact that I was not being treated with the same respect that others were enjoying. I decided to post it here because you, the reader, are in some fashion connected to the social dynamics of this website. If this was a private site, which only we read, this wouldn't even be a problem; but as I said before, a lot of people read this site, and we all have our own reputations here. My complaints did not stem from any feelings of inadequacy as Graeme assumes, but rather a building frustration at the attitude with which I have been recieving. Like I said, a few together really dont amount to anything, but I posted all the quotes to show a disturbing trend that I had noticed. What once was playful and humorous had slowly changed into "whip the boy for humorous purposes". Even if the latter comments were made with a humorous intent, the context with which they are placed puts them closer to sardonic on the humor scale. I really hope to put some sort of closure to this matter and get on with the site, and I'm sure you do too. Crossed Reality November 12, 2002 9:20PM For the record, no, they don't work here. Elliott has done plenty of guest work and art for us though, and Shawn (who runs Staccato) has linked to us many times. Kitty Vertigo November 12, 2002 9:17PM Meow? Shawn and Elliot work here now? Why wasn't I told about this? Who is Shawn anyways? Oh well, welcome abord fellas!! Meow! Crossed Reality November 12, 2002 7:52PM Well, I wish I had noticed that someone had gone behind my back while I was gone. I'll fix the html and change that article to a Juxtapositions later. Instead of writing a feature about it, I'm just going to respond here. I'll answer each of his quotes, and questions, in kind. First of all, most of the things said are meant to be humourous. I've had Shawn Handyside dancing disco on Elliott Hoffman's grave, and did they complain? No. But it is Travis's right. What I first want to address is the issues of the voice of this site, and his use of the word "our". Yes, indeed, the tone of this webpage has changed since it's creation. That's because the balance of the work has shifted. It was originally intended for the three (now four) of us to be able to say anything we damned well pleased on a website. This is still true. But, at last estimate, somewhere around 90% of the stuff done on this site is done by me. So, if you're getting my voice 90% of the time, naturally the site is going to be skewed a bit, no? I've never prevented anyone from writing here; in fact, with Kitty's news post script in place I'm much happier with the "group" feeling that has been coming on. But I refuse to be slighted because I do most of the damn work. Here comes the our part again. Yes, I still consider it "our" site. But so long as I'm providing the sole financial support, doing all the administrative functions, and what not, I don't really feel like being criticized about how our site is run. Travis makes it seem like he's the only one who has other obligations. I'm a full time student; three to four nights a week I leave the house at 8:00am and get back around 9:00pm because I'm also a night librarian. I work two to three weekends a month, completely removing them. In addition, I have to find time to maintain my social life (which covers as much time as Travis’ full time girlfriend), my family, and my writing career. On top of this, I attempt to have something new here for you to read every day. I’m still not very good at writing with deadlines, but I’m working at it. Travis is correct that he seems to be slighted more than others for not producing something. There’s a very good reason for this. He breaks promises. Take the recent example of the quiz. He told me at 8:00pm he would be back to take them “after dinner”. I put up my comic just before midnight, when he still hadn’t returned. On many cases he says he will do something, and just doesn’t. This is in direct contradiction to what the rest of the members accomplish. Usually Kitty doesn’t announce his feature plans at all. I just wake up to find a shiny new KV sitting in my mailbox. Since he never says he’s going to produce one at a certain date, I never have anything to complain about. Laurie is much the same way. And every time they have set a deadline for themselves, they’ve kept it. Kenny finished the very script I’m using to write this weeks before I thought he would. If Zen says he’s going to have a feature ready before midnight, and doesn’t, I’m understandably upset. As the webmaster for this site, I feel responsible for its public image. And, quite frankly, I feel horrible whenever a day goes by without a feature unless there’s a damn good reason. If he fails to deliver on his promise, there’s nothing to show for the day. That’s not to say that any of the things he quoted me as saying on those days were meant in complete seriousness. They are little jabs to the ribs, nothing more. I whole-heartedly recommend that he participate in the contests! Nothing generates more humor than a battle of wits. The shameful event at a social gathering: I apologized already. At any rate, it’s hardly “shameful”, just a funny idiosyncratic story. Zen has told them about me before. I recall one thing he said before my friend April that I did not want done, but so be it. Lastly, the quotes. The first two are from when this site is opening. If you can believe those were meant seriously, more power to you. All of our pages were empty, and I was in a mad rush to generate content. I think they came through remarkably well. The cabbage power shirt was never put online because I didn’t have time. The store is the least important part of our site, and I treated it as such until the most current design. Yes, there are no Kitty Vertigo, ZenZagg, or Athena Falconess branded products in there at the moment. There are two reasons for this. One: Do you see any Crossed Reality products in there? No? Me either. Two: None of them has designed anything for me. Instead of wondering why there’s nothing there, Zen, why don’t you make something to put there? Am I expected to create everything we sell, as well? The new store has generated roughly 700% of the sales of the old one, so I think my new product designs hit a good nerve in someone. I suppose you could contend that Picasso is “Crossed Reality” merchandise, but Picasso has also become the global mascot of this site. I’ve already addressed the quotes about Zen’s reliability. I’ve also addressed the quiz one. He did indeed finish it. Twenty-four hours after he said he would. That’s pretty bad for a site on a deadline. Did anyone really not take the “Busy, lazy, shiftless bastard!” line as a joke? And last, the quotes from my religion feature. The first is in no way a slight to Zen’s intelligence. It’s not secret that everyone on this website has tested well above the genius level on multiple occasions. What was meant is that he places more faith and weight in his spiritual intelligence than his sheer mental facilities. And yes, being willing to drop your doubts and just believe in something is required to participate in a religion that whole heartedly. Can anyone say that that is not true? I also can’t figure out what problem he had with the second quote. Indeed, so what? Does a mere statement of your faith offend you now? In closing, this is a temporary issue that will be resolved shortly. Why Zen felt this needed to be done in such a way is beyond me. To me, he is taking things far too seriously. If I considered him a “jilting bastard” or even a lazy, shifting one, I would have removed him from this site long ago. As it is, my last examination of our statistics showed him contributing the least anyway. This is more from his own fears of inadequacy than any action on the part of a Jux staff member. His feature will remain up in its current form until I can correct the formatting when I return home from work tonight. I hope you enjoyed this, your 1200 word news post. Crossed Reality November 12, 2002 6:53PM Those bastards! ZenZagg November 12, 2002 3:10AM Correction: There is now yet another new feature online. Please make sure your oxygen valves are securely in the open position. Crossed Reality November 11, 2002 10:54PM To quote the youth of America: The feature be online, yo. Crossed Reality November 11, 2002 10:00PM To clarify Zen's post, he is busy. That just makes him the busy, lazy, shiftless bastard he's made out to be! Godspeed to Kitty, the second Jux member in less than a week to change their main operating system. Kitty Vertigo November 11, 2002 6:09PM Hello people. I am about to destroy my computer, so you probably won't hear from me for a few days. Not that it takes a few days to destroy a computer, that part is usually pretty quick. It just takes a few days to get it working again. Oh well. I am guessing CR will have his feature up later tonight, but that is just a guess. From what he made all of us do, it should be a cool feature, similar to my "Ink Blots" but different, cause I made all my stuff up. Say bye bye to my computer. Meow. ZenZagg November 11, 2002 2:37AM Just so you know, I finished the quizzes. Now Graeme has nothing to stop him from completing the group feature, and he can stop whining ;). I'm quite a busy person you know, I'm not the shiftless bastard that I'm made out to be... By the way, are you going to eat the other half of that sandwich? Crossed Reality November 10, 2002 11:16PM Feature is up. Not the one I wanted, but that's not my fault at all! Crossed Reality November 10, 2002 8:49PM I was amazingly tired and busy yesterday, sorry about that. I'm working on the new feature for tonight now. I did some examinations of the four Jux members. Well, three. I'll finish the feature when Zen finishes the exams. If he does. If not, well, I'll go ahead and do it anyway. Crossed Reality November 9, 2002 12:37PM It's 61 degrees outside. Do you know where your pants are? Crossed Reality November 9, 2002 12:50AM Well I'll be damned. A lot of changing tiny little options and adding lines to system files of programs later, my computer is basically back to normal. Kitty's new feature is up (under the date it was supposed to go up under, but I couldn't reach my mail to do it). Now, I have to go reinstall my firewall and virus scanner. Yay. Crossed Reality November 8, 2002 11:03PM I'm...still in Linux. It seems that Windows XP explodes whenever my modem wants to download data. Newest (DIGITALLY FUCKING SIGNED) drivers are loaded, reloaded, blech. I'm working on fixing it...but, you know, damn. Let this be a lesson to you folks. It's always good to have two operating systems on a PC. Good to have a fallback point. Crossed Reality November 8, 2002 7:32PM I'm in Linux at the moment. Just finished backing up my Windows partition in DOS with Norton Ghost, didn't feel like booting into it again to post this. We are go for Win XP Pro installation. Kitty Vertigo November 8, 2002 12:26PM Wow... I am sorry about that. I will make it up to you with a feature tonight. Again, I am sorry. Bad kitty. Meow Kitty Vertigo November 8, 2002 2:32AM (Censored for stupidity) Crossed Reality November 7, 2002 10:28PM Not to bump Athena or Zen's posts down, but there is a new feature up presently. Athena Falconess November 7, 2002 8:38PM Hello all. I'm sorry I haven't done a feature in awhile, but in case you haven't noticed, I'm going into the army. This pretty much means that I'm having to deal with a lot of personal shit right now that has made it hard for me to be funny. I'm going to try to turn in a feature before I go off to basic March 13. After that date, you won't hear from me for a real long time. Consider it a sabbatical. Once I get back, I promise I'll be my old funny self again. Pending of course that I don't change to much. Heh, *shakes a little* ZenZagg November 7, 2002 5:35PM Well, the verdict is finally in. My transmission has failed me. The Celica is dead. Long live the Celica! I can either pay $600 and have them do a basic fix of the front seal, bushings, and torque converter so that I can at least trade it in towards another car, or I can pay $1500 for the real deal and get a one year warranty on it. I paid $1800 for the $&!&*@! car, so I'm going with option A. Being without a car sucks. Crossed Reality November 7, 2002 12:55PM Okay, first of all, you should have a new feature tonight. I still have lots of extra work to do, but damnit, I'm not going to leave you hanging for three days in a row. There are other projects around the site that need to be done as well. Have you looked at the source on the Features page lately? Using composer for months to add links to that thing has left the code looking like it went through a blender. On the home front, I appear to have just been nominated to go to China this summer and particpate (briefly) in an archaelogical dig. Yeah, I don't know what to make of that yet either. Especially since I'm already studying in Italy this summer...GAH! Crossed Reality November 6, 2002 11:17PM Essays and stuff were written tonight. I have yet more to work on now. So, yeah, I've been too busy to do a feature. Sorry :( But, hey, like four or five dead web comics have been updating, including Spelling! Check it out! Kitty Vertigo November 6, 2002 9:56PM I just found the COOLEST thing EVER! In Mozilla you can use PIE MENUS! I don't know about you, but I think pie is awesome. It is even cooler that they named these menus after pie. In case you don't know, a pie menu is like a normal menu, except the cursor starts in the middle and your choices are in any directions. It is like the menus used in The Sims. They are fun and pretty and now I can impress people who come to look at my computer with them because they are just way high tech! If you want to see a pie menu in action just Click Here! Meow! Crossed Reality November 6, 2002 2:09AM Looks like the GOP kicked some ass. While I'm not a Republican per se, I do hate the Democratic party [but not necessarily all the people in it...just most of them.], so I'm celebrating quite nicely. Crossed Reality November 5, 2002 10:01PM No feature tonight. Alas, I have work to do. I have a weird plan of getting us another humour author that should be quite...interesting. It might cost us a little money as well. Crossed Reality November 5, 2002 1:22PM Election day. I'm going to go take a nap now. Remember, when in doubt, it's best to vote against facists. ZenZagg November 4, 2002 10:35PM I was dredging the depths of my hard drive when I stumbled upon a story I wrote a few years ago. It's called "He Never Looked Back" and you can find it in the features section. I don't think I had any real inspiration for writing it other than I was slightly out of sorts late one night and decided to write a little fiction for a website known as Everything2. Don't worry, I don't know what got into me either :P. Crossed Reality November 4, 2002 7:09PM Hello everyone. Was it scary to have Kitty updating for two days straight? Yes, well, don't worry, everything is okay now. You're probably expecting a feature tonight. Lord knows I am too. What am I going to do? I don't know. My refugee dog Rikku was taken to the new animal shelter today. I wasn't too keen on the idea, but they don't put them down at this one, so she should be alright. I'll try to get some sort of feature up tonight. I have essays, research papers, and renewed work on my novel to complete though. We'll see. It has come to my attention that Laurie and Lauren are working on a group feature. I think their sole interest is to further confuse people. From the sounds of it it should be quite good when it's completed. I'll be announcing the end date for our sticker contest soon. Enough people should have recieved theirs by now to make it feasible to end it in the near future. Then we can have the great Apron contest! Yay! Actually, if we have another contest, it's not going to involve purchasing anything from our store. That seems to have greatly lowered the popularity of this one. Oh well. Kitty Vertigo November 4, 2002 3:53PM Mmmmmmmm fish. And pickles. Fish and pickles. Not really fish though, I mean Goldfish Crackers. But I call them fish. And pickles are pickles. What a yummy lunch. I don't have a feature for you today, but maybe someone else will later. Who knows? But if you are bored you can click hear for some funny flash/movie thingies. Weebl and Bob. Meow. Kitty Vertigo November 3, 2002 11:59PM Hello human peoples. Just your Jux Kitty checking in. Uhm, everyone else is still missing. I think they went to the grocery store to get me some kitty-food. Anyways, here is a shiney new feature for you! Well, its not here, its over in the features section so if you will just click the features link that is to the left, you can read it. You know you want to read it. So go read it already. Meow. Kitty Vertigo November 3, 2002 6:33PM Meow. Everyone is hiding. I don't know where they went. Anyways, I got my cool happy scanner to work finally, so here you go. I didn't know you could get those at wal*mart. Now I don't have to go run over my own. It is a real reciept! Really, I didn't modify it or anything! Meow! Crossed Reality November 3, 2002 2:25AM But I don't want it all. Just...enough of it. Or something. I don't even know anymore. Crossed Reality November 2, 2002 4:47PM Your feature is up for the night. 3/4s of the Jux crew is heading down to the middle of nowhere in Georgia tonight for a party put together by our friend Gnome, better known as Lauren. You'll have to catch us later. Crossed Reality November 2, 2002 2:29PM Taken Down!Taken Down Deux! Is this the man you want drawing your Spelling the Vacuum? Crossed Reality November 1, 2002 11:29PM Feature went up a few hours ago, by the way. *heads back to Spider-Man DVD* Crossed Reality November 1, 2002 4:22PM One of the first movies we ever discussed on this site was Spider-Man. Well, I picked up the DVD today. Has the verdict changed? Not really. The disc(s) are great, the movie is great...Peter Parker's decision at the end still sucks. A lot. Crossed Reality November 1, 2002 11:55AM Alright, you're going to have a new feature tonight. I'll try to figure out what it is in a little bit. One thing's sadly for sure, Elliott has given up updating Spelling for another week or so. I'm not sure if you should send him cards of condolence, or letter bombs. Crossed Reality October 31, 2002 2:08PM Waiting for Halloween to really start? Me too. Don't forget to check out our shiny Halloween story while you're waiting :) Other than that...to use my signature phrase, this is bullshit. Crossed Reality October 31, 2002 12:00AM As promised, the Halloween story is up. On time. Wow. Crossed Reality October 30, 2002 8:06PM Go to GameForms and download the new Final Fantasy X-2 movie. Watch it repeatedly. Yuna can do FLIPS! Crossed Reality October 30, 2002 5:46PM There's a new feature up. Your real, shiny, at least hopefully good Halloween feature will go up pretty soon after midnight. Crossed Reality October 30, 2002 12:50PM Good? Bad? Polar society is never great, but I'd much rather have a mix of exceptional and poor than an excessive of mind numbingly average. How about this? Contrary to popular belief, it appears at least a few people in China were blessed with common sense. Crossed Reality October 29, 2002 10:58PM Feature's online. Crossed Reality October 28, 2002 10:32PM Change of plans. You won't be getting a new feature tonight, because I have to work on my dinosaur tail for Halloween! Sorry :( Crossed Reality October 28, 2002 1:47PM Actually, the idea of the research behind that idea sickens me, so I think we'll have to resort to a serious feature on the migratory habits of Californians. Crossed Reality October 28, 2002 1:13PM News! You'll have a feature tonight, I'm just not sure what. No editing success so far with the Halloween story. I'm think of doing a serious feature on what the many varities of pornography you can find on the internet say about both our culture, and the funding behind our high-speed infrastructure. We've got bitchin` candy! I have to go to work in a few hours ;) Crossed Reality October 27, 2002 8:50PM Feature is up. And the Halloween story is finished and ready for editing. If only my editor would get online... Crossed Reality October 27, 2002 6:24PM Yes, yes it most certainly turns into "olds". The Halloween story's first draft is finished. I'm going to send it to the editing mill later. Feature tonight? I'll probably do another Halloween Picasso strip if no one else decides to do anything. Kitty Vertigo October 27, 2002 5:57PM Hello everyone. Apartment hunting this weekend went quite poorly. I went to look at this guy's apartment. He was drunk. And high. I said "I'll get back to you." but I really meant "Uhhhm... no." Oh well... I'll find a place someday. Oh yeah, I fixed the News Archives link at the bottom of the page. So you can click it now and it will do what it is supposed to, which is obviously to bring you to the news archive, but that is all old stuff so why would you want to go there when you have new news here? If news becomes old does it become olds? AHHHH!!! Meow. Crossed Reality October 26, 2002 7:34PM There's a new feature online! I'm not going to tell you what it is, because that would elminate the fun of you going and guessing, but I'll leave a teaser image below. Also, I am aware of the fact that the News Archive link at the bottom doesn't work in Internet Explorer. I'll bring this to Kitty's attention, so he can fix the generator. Crossed Reality October 26, 2002 1:17PM Hmm. I'm still in the dark as to what your feature is going to be tonight. I've been thinking of lighting fires under the arses of all of my other staff members and a guest author or two, in the goal of making Halloween features for the next half-week or so! Wouldn't that be grand? All of them would just be a lead up to my wonderful Halloween story (which is, as of yet, not quite finished) that will be revealed as soon as it turns into the 31st. It will be the first full of sample of something at least resembling my "real writing" on this site, although I'm not sure how good it will be. Well then, assuming I'm not able to round up or write a feature tonight, I'll present you all with a coupon for a free sticker! [Warning: Coupon not usable in the state of Nebraska. Void outside of the United States. Yes, even in Canada. The Jux Entente has the right to refuse acceptance of this coupon on a day when a Panda was born. Ever.] Crossed Reality October 25, 2002 10:43PM New feature online. I can't promise that this success will be repeated tomorrow, as I was asked to work...for my third weekend in a row. As I told Rebecca earlier, at least I know I'm costing them a lot of money. Well, there are three other members of this site and one quest whom I know has a feature completed (hint hint, wink wink, send it damnit#$%^#$@%), so hopefully someone will fill in for me if I'm drained. And I probably will be. Crossed Reality October 25, 2002 5:00PM I've noticed again how out of date the Information section is. Meh. I suppose I'll have to work on that a bit later. My parents insist upon adding a picture of my dog... Crossed Reality October 24, 2002 10:23PM I'm too tired to write a feature tonight, so it looks like you won't be getting one. I'm not sure if I could have come up with anything funnier than that condom article below anyway. Spend the night enjoying the fact that the sniper is no longer a problem. Yay! Crossed Reality October 24, 2002 5:54PM Just a quick news update for all of you out there. Let's see what we have today. First of all, it looks like they got 'em. Am I the only one wondering where all of this white van nonsense came from? I mean, other than the fact that there are 8 million of them on the roads...per square mile. Other than that, can you believe that they are paying people to participate in this test? Crossed Reality October 24, 2002 1:16AM Oops. Kitty's new feature went up hours ago, but it appears I was so wrapped up in what I was writing I completely forgot to write a news post to go with it. So, those of you who figured out it was online already...good for you! For the rest, you know now. Kitty Vertigo October 23, 2002 6:19PM Meow! I actually wrote a feature! It is fun and happy in a way, if you consider morbidity to be fun and happy. Anyways, you will probably get that later tonight if CR posts it. In other news, I am going to sleep! Oh, and watch Enterprise tonight at 8:00pm cause that show is the coolest. Meow! Crossed Reality October 22, 2002 11:38PM Baby, I've missed you. Come to papa! [A sequel to a Final Fantasy$%@#%#] Crossed Reality October 22, 2002 10:55PM If you check our features page, you'll see that it's updated. With a quiz feature, no less. Sorry I didn't have time to make up a bunch of stupid little graphics for you to paste all over the place, but I do have to work at some point, you know :D Crossed Reality October 22, 2002 11:06AM Yay! No second class today, so I get to come home early before work. Sadly, the class I did have is the one I hate. At any rate, I'm not quite sure what your feature for the night is going to be. I did start work on the Halloween story I plan to put up (I don't believe in taking notes, and this benefits you!). I'm not sure if what I'm currently attempting with it is going to work out, or if I'm going to have to scrap it and start over. I've never been very good at writing horror. Not because the stories themselves are actually bad, but because I always feel like they're not as good as they could be. Maybe I'm just being overcritical of myself, as always. One thing is for sure, I'm much better at writing for the sappy holiday themes than the others :D Crossed Reality October 22, 2002 12:26AM Okay, so this is a test. If this works, the message you're reading will be the first ever created by our new server-side news poster. Thank you Kitty Vertigo! He's going to work on getting some automation behind the features next. Speaking of features, the new one for the night went up a few hours ago, but due to the testing requirements, I wasn't able to post a main page update. Those of you with the feature listing knew about it though, and I know there are a few of you...Lauren.Okay, so...good luck to us *presses button* Crossed Reality October 20, 2002 11:00pm Sadly, Kitty's news posting device isn't quite operational yet. So I'm doing this by hand. With great loathing. But, you have a new feature online...finally. Dreadfully sorry :( Crossed Reality October 18, 2002 10:33pm My TV came today. I'm pretty sure it does everything but cure world hunger. There's even a kitchen sink built right into the side. Anyway, today should be the last day of my grand reorganizing. The funny shall begin making soon. Kitty's made wonderful progress with the news poster. I'm pleased. Crossed Reality October 17, 2002 1:28pm Oh man. I spent 12 hours first dissassembling furniture and then attempting to build new replacements. I unwired, rewired, shifted, screwed, moved...and I'm still not done. I had to sleep on a damn couch last night because my bed is covered with game systems and stereo components, which I can't move because my floor is covered with entertainment center parts...I have to finish it tonight when I get back from work. Which means you might not have a feature tonight, either. The good news is that Kenny seems to be making real strides in his new found goal to let us put things on the site dynamically. He showed me a mock-up of the news poster yesterday, and I was cheered! Crossed Reality October 15, 2002 10:27pm Feature is up. Laurie's bio is up. And...I'm really tired! So I'm not up! I have to go entertainment center shopping tomorrow. That should be heap big fun, eh? We shall see my friends, we shall see. Athena Falconess October 15, 2002 12:24am Yee-hee!!! Athena Falconess here. You may not have noticed but I now have my own signature image and my own spot on the members page because, that's right, I'm now a full member of Jux. This really won't change that much except I'll probably be doing more commentaries and I may do a news post from time to time. Hopefully, if my school schedule lets up any, I'll also be able to do more features to entertain the lot of you. Hehe. Crossed Reality October 14, 2002 11:02pm Yeah, so, I've been busy. You won't be getting a new feature tonight mostly because all the ideas I had for a quick one I decided wouldn't be all that funny, so I'm not going to bother. Purchased a new TV yesterday, it will be here Friday, along with the entertainment center I had to get with it. Apparently, my current big-ass wooden thing is too small, so I need a bigger big-ass wooden thing. At any rate, I'm going to have component video inputs finally. Two of them. Three cheers! You'll have a feature and probably a semi-major announcement tomorrow. Major to us. Crossed Reality October 13, 2002 8:23pm Run! It's October the thirteenth! Well, anyway, you have a new feature online, as promised. I'm not entirely sure why I called it "suck". I think I just felt like naming something that. The Information section of this site should get majorly upgraded tomorrow, if all goes according to plan. And to go in a completely different direction, can you believe the Angels are in the world series? I don't even keep track of baseball, like, ever, and that still amazes me. Crossed Reality October 12, 2002 9:43pm There won't be any making with the funny tonight. I worked all day, so I'm dead tired. In fact, I'm going to bed right when I finish writing this. And, since no one else sent me a feature, that pretty much means you're screwed for the night. I have to work the whole damn day tomorrow again, so I'm not promising a feature, but Sundays are usually less evil than Saturdays (actually, today wasn't that bad at all, just long), so you'll probably get one. I won't promise that it will be of any decent length, though. By the way, just so there's no understanding, everything in our store has been marked up exactly one cent. If you think something is overpriced, don't blame me. Blame cafe press! Crossed Reality October 11, 2002 11:23pm Read my previous update for the day below for information on our new store. Now that that's out of the way, your feature is now online, detailing our little contest. I've also completely overhauled the "our favourites" section of the features page, just like I promised. Amazingly, when I was done, we had one from each month in there. That was not planned, and certainly not how it worked out the last time. Of course, the last time it was changed was back in July, so, yeah :D I look forward to seeing some contest entries people :P Crossed Reality October 11, 2002 10:32pm Well, some news has arrived, and it is good. First of all, your feature isn't up yet, but it will be in just a few minutes. Not that it will be a normal feature...it's going to be...a CONTEST! A contest involving our new store, which you can access by clicking the same old Jux Store link from the left. It's not entirely finished yet, but most of the new stuff is there. I'm going to bring back the old Gurk! shirt and mug, not to mention the Kitty Vertigo novelty flying disc, and a new product or two. But it's complete enough to be put online, which makes me happy. Not only that, but before it was even officially opened, it managed to break our old sales records! Those Shawn is Old stickers are going fast people. Pretend there's a limited supply and get yours today! The feature/contest is going to involve both of the stickers you see in the store, so you might want to stock up. Crossed Reality October 10, 2002 11:06pm I meant to tell you all about my fighting the Georgia State Patrol soon, but I have many, many more important things. Let's begin. First of all, you have two new features tonight! Only one of them by me! Kitty has given us a very brilliant piece, and I've delievered the Picasso comic with the longest explanation of all time. There are more links in that feature than on the damn Features page...well, okay, maybe not. Zen and Kitty seem to be wanting to take a more active interest in the site in the future, which is great. I've also got some major stuff I need to do here. I plan on adding lots of photos to the Photo FAQ soon, and updating the Information section in general. The "Our Favourites" box in the Features page also needs to be overhauled, and a lot of empty commentary boxes blued out until someone wants to comment. I also have quite a few new things in mind for the store, including new shirts (and the removal of most of the old ones), stickers, a wall clock, and maybe a poster. One of the stickers I'm thinking of you will witness in today's Picasso strip. Finally, after reading Kitty's new feature, Elliott Hoffman suddenly came up with an image that I can't stop laughing at. It's actually cobbled from what was already one of the funniest pictures of me ever taken (one that's going to go on the photo page when I update it), and made yet more hilarious. That's difficult. You'll need to read Kitty's Inkblot article to understand it completely, but even that is not entirely necessary. Crossed Reality October 10, 2002 1:04pm Your new feature is coming later tonight. Until then, Picasso has appeared in a guest comic over at Spelling the Vacuum. Check it out by clicking the link to the left. Try to vote for my friend Elliott while you're there :) Crossed Reality October 9, 2002 10:11pm Sorry for the lack of updating last night. I was really busy. The story of one of the things I was held up with, and why I now have a court date, I will relate tomorrow. Traffic cops are funny. Anyway, there's a new feature up by Kitty Veritgo, which was going to go up yesterday if I had had the time. Sorry! :D Crossed Reality October 7, 2002 11:17pm Yarr! Picasso feature off the port bow! Crossed Reality October 7, 2002 3:56pm Hello all. I'm working on the feature right now, but I have to go to work...still, I thought I'd give you a little preview. Assuming I have enough time to do so, this is what tonight's feature is going to look like. If I don't get a chance to finish it tonight, expect the new Picasso strip tomorrow. Crossed Reality October 6, 2002 3:54pm Sorry for the lack of updating yesterday. I had a new feature all prepared by Athena, and was planning to put it up and all...then I went out to see two movies and eat dinner. So, yeah, I got home late. Anyway, Red Dragon is a fucking awesome flick that has made me forget both Manhunter and Hannibal completely. I'm not quite ready to compare it to Silence yet, I'm going to give it some time to sink in, but we'll see. I highly recommend you go witness it, though. And with that, let me say that there is a new feature online. Yayfulness! Crossed Reality October 4, 2002 11:53pm New feature up. October is here. Meh. The deeper into this month we get, the more depressed I'm going to get. It's like a yearly event. Right about Halloween, it'll level off, and maintain a constant 'mehhey' level until about Thanksgiving, when I enter a holiday high. This lasts until January 2nd, when I get post holiday depression for a little bit, and then I'm normal until spring hits. Fall and Spring are my favourite months for weather, but, without fail, twist my pysche into knots and remind me that yes, I am manic depressive. I can feel the claws descending now. Will it be as bad as last year? Probably not, unless there's some sort of social nuclear blast. Which can happen. Crossed Reality October 3, 2002 10:58pm So, I started re-reading Candide today. I had forgotten how damn good that book is. I had also forgotten how common and nonchalant rape is in it. "Oh, I was just passed around like a joint between two men. Drat, I missed a button." Scary! Anyway, I was planning to do a feature satirizing the satire, containing such witty remarks as that one, but at some point that started to just feel wrong. So, instead, well...go to the features page. Also, I was shown today a site containing a ton of hilarious librarian jokes. By that I mean jokes for librarians. I was planning on putting it up here, so you could view it in all of its glory as well...but then I realized that they would probably seem lame, and make you think less of me. So, instead, I'm going to link to...this! It's better anyway. Crossed Reality October 2, 2002 11:28pm There's a new feature up now. Witness how brilliant Picasso would be, should I have Elliott's artistic skills. Or something similar. By the way, if you're trying to figure out what the hell last night's update meant, here's a clue: it's gibberish. Does that help? Excellent! Crossed Reality October 2, 2002 8:11am If this isn't an eternal delimma, I don't know what is. Welp, off to England to 1688. Crossed Reality October 1, 2002 10:25pm The new feature is up. I like it. As you can tell by my lack of verboseness in my recent news updates, I'm still quite busy. Hopefully this will be fixed soon. Until then, might I suggest...uhrm....asking morning glory about the story? I heard there are walri in it. Hehehe. Walri. Crossed Reality September 30, 2002 10:54pm No update tonight. I'm just tired at the moment, sorry to say. Or should I say no feature tonight. Yes, that would be more accurate. But, hey, go read Spelling or CNN or something. Check out a book. Build a house. Shoot down a German plane. Crossed Reality September 29, 2002 9:56pm Whoah, a new feature. Whoah, it's not written by me. Whoah, it's not written by someone I poked at to do it. Whoah, the word whoah has lost all meaning. Man, I've got a lot to talk about, but nothing any of you would understand. I'll rant about something appropriate tomorrow. I've decided to archive the news on a weekly basis for a little while longer...just because Elliott whined. And because I wasn't really sick of how I updated it before, just how I had to update it with all the sick gaps. Oh, me. Crossed Reality September 28, 2002 6:07pm Yep, you've got a new feature again. Rejoice! I've also changed the way I'm going to do the news from now on. Only updates I feel to be relevant in some way to the current feature update are going to remain on the main page, instead of our previous one week system. Should make things look a little less cluttered. We'll see how it works out. Crossed Reality September 27, 2002 5:05pm Psst. We're updated. Don't tell anyone. Crossed Reality September 25, 2002 8:00pm Two bits of good news. First, you have a new feature up tonight. Not by me, but by one Elliott Hoffman. You might have heard of him. He's been here before. I think. And for the final bit of good news, I appear to be on the mend. I should be close enough to normal health tomorrow (and free of my examlyworkly duties) to restore work on the site to normal. I was also going to bitch about my Geography test here, despite getting a perfect score, but I'll save it. Crossed Reality September 24, 2002 12:25pm Jesus Christ. Star Fox Adventures got here a day early. I've not even finished Kingdom Hearts yet. Too many games! *dies* Crossed Reality September 23, 2002 2:10pm Hell has frozen over. I have called in sick to work. I've never, ever done that before. In other weird, unfortunate news, my car starting smoking the second I turned the ignition off at school. It did the same thing, but less so, when I got home. There's no oil leak that I can see, it's not running hot, the engine sounds and runs, but the damn thing is smoking. This only adds to the pain that has been my existance lately. Hopefully all that happened is that some leaves or something have gotten shoved against somewhere hot. Living in Georgia like I do, I'm quite used to finding tree detrius everywhere. You name it, you'll find a pine needle in it. I'm going to see if I can pull some guest strings to get you a new feature soon. I was planning to do more than this, at the very least, but my illness has drop kicked my last will. I had to drag my ass out of bed to take two exams today, I've gotta drag my ass out of bed to do another exam and work tomorrow night (I'll be damned if I'm missing two days), not to mention write a 400 word essay tonight. I don't even really feel like sitting in my videogame chair. It's been over 24 hours since I touched Kingdom Hearts due to this. I'm about halfway through the final area, and I'll probably drug myself up enough to finish it later, but for now my videogaming is being reduced to playing my GameBoy Advance in bed. Luckily I have three new games for it. Kingdom Hearts is the second coming I thought it would be, by the way. Now that I've rambled on long enough, let me sum it up for you: Graeme is, in fact, legally dead. You'll hopefully have some guest pieces up soon. Kingdom Hearts kicks ass. Oh, and today's Penny Arcade kicks all sorts of ass. This Ghost thing is just stupid. Grow up people. Crossed Reality September 22, 2002 10:30am Okay, two things happened yesterday to put me in an even worse mood. Work nearly drove me to homicidal rage. I'm not even going to bother to type the stories up here. But, while all that was going on, I also suddenly developed a very bad cold! Which I have now! I never get colds. Blech$%@#$^#$^ Crossed Reality September 19, 2002 10:16pm What's this? A new feature so soon after I pronounced gloom and doom? Yeah, I'm weird. But before you go read that, I have a few things to discuss. I'll even bullet them for you. I started taking my GameBoy Advance to school this week on a whim. Three of the four new games I mentioned yesterday are on the wonderful handheld platform, so it just seemed to make sense. I was playing it before classes started, you know? I realized something weird this morning when I hurried through getting ready and cursed traffic for making me late. Why? I wanted more time to play my GameBoy! This effect was entirely unanticipated. If there's one thing that traveling has done for me, it has brought me to truly love and appreciate Atlanta morning radio. While the rest of the country is generally mediocre to sub par (the areas I've been in, at least), San Francisco's was the worst. Anyway, Atlanta's morning radio, despite being devoid of music, is actually funny. I'm rather  critical of damn near anything, which doesn't make me easy to entertain. But I was actually laughing hard enough this morning to hinder my driving ability. That's probably a bad thing, actually. Noticed the commentary thing? They're not gone, just blued out by default now. And there you go. Crossed Reality September 18, 2002 11:12pm Okay, I'm sorry, but this is just nuts. I'm coming up on my second weekend in a row working, I have four exams this week in addition to the group project I just finished and the report I have to write, and I just don't feel good in general. In general, I'm at the end of my wits. There's a new feature up now, and I think it's okay, but it's certainly not much of one. This is the sort of thing you can expect from me for the next few days. I have a lot of things I'd like to do for the site, but not enough time, patience, or drive to do them at the moment. Hell, I have about eighty different things I want to rant about here, but can't sort them out. So, expect Jux to be a bit sporatic in its updates until at least sometime next week. This isn't to say I'm definately not updating, just that I'm not capable of fufilling my desired daily schedule at the moment. Classes and work are killing all of us except Kenny...who's just lazy. Lazy lazy lazy. Never does anything. *whines* If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go unwind with Kingdom Hearts, one of the four new games I've gotten in the past five days. Crossed Reality September 16, 2002 9:58pm Today was a tiring, frustrating day. So you get a tired, frustrated feature. I hope you enjoy it. Crossed Reality September 15, 2002 8:21pm I hate to say this, but I'm calling this weekend a loss. Now that school's back in, working all weekend is a big damn deal. I've got some homework to do for tomorrow, and I'm already tired, and just...blech. I'll end Picasso week tomorrow in a hopefully suitably impressive fashion. Hopefully. My schedule is just tight as a drum at the moment. Besides, this is volunteer work, what are you expecting? :P Crossed Reality September 14, 2002 9:27pm Sorry guys. I worked for nine hours today, and then did the whole socialization thing. I'm going to go play some Sonic Advance (impulse buy...I've got three games shipping next week, I probably shouldn't have...) and unwind before passing out for work tomorrow. Don't worry though, tomorrow you'll get a double update to make up for this. I hope. Crossed Reality September 13, 2002 10:35pm Okay, I thought I'd post some images for you to enjoy...both of them taken in the last few minutes. Sorry for the crappy webcam shot, but video capture I do not have :| Finally. My God. One hundred and twenty Shines. Crossed Reality September 13, 2002 6:52pm If you don't know what the hell is going on in today's Picasso comic, you've not played nearly enough Final Fantasy. Hobart is replacing the dead Bobert. Deal with it. :) Let's see, what else to discuss...oh yes, did you notice the completely random and unexpected link we recieved from Staccato today? I was surprised as well. So, I have to work this weekend. That means roughly eight hours of reference work tomorrow. My first weekend in the new position. I've not had any problems so far, so let's hope none pop up at random now...I want to earn my drawer! The weird thing is that now that I'm a part timer that isn't considered a part timer, I get to work weekends with other people of the part time staff (normally there's one one part time employee on the weekend skeleton crew, as a shelver), which means I'll have weekends with my friend Samantha, which is weird. Of course none of this library crap interests you, so I don't know why I'm rambling about it. Perhaps because it interests me, and I'm the one pay for the right to put this stuff up here, aren't I? Damn straight. Are you ready for Tuesday? That's when Hurricane Retail 2002 first comes ashore for us gamers. There are have been spits and little squalls all summer, but this fucker is coming in hard now. Next week Kingdom Hearts and Castlevania: Harmony of Dissonance will be arriving on my doorstep. Animal Crossing comes out then as well, but I just won't have time. The week after that, Star Fox Adventures hits like a fist. Other things such as Summoner 2 come out in this time, but I'm not going to have time to worry about it. After the force of September, there's the lull, or "eye", of October. This is where I pick up stuff like Animal Crossing and the various others that I'm not going to bother to type out that I was forced to miss in the wonderful pain of September. The eye passes on the 29th, when Resident Evil Zero decides to make its long delayed, yet achingly beautiful, presence known in the land of Nintendo. I think Vice City also comes out then, for those of you who aren't horribly bored with Grand Theft Auto. Not long after that, Metroid Prime and Metroid Fusion, the first games since 1993, come out on the same day. And we've not even reached December yet! Someone hold me...and sedate my wallet. Crossed Reality September 12, 2002 11:18pm Okay, we're updated. Three new features online. One is the comic that I didn't have time to post before I took the site down on the 10th. One is just the index page from the 11th, archived. And then there's today's new Picasso comic. How's that for coming off a day break? Thank you, thank you *bows*. In other news, I was given a drawer today at work! All my own! To keep stuff in! Believe it or not, this is a big deal. Crossed Reality September 12, 2002 1:29pm I'm just saying something now to get the site back up. Two features tonight, and I'll archive the news later as well. Welcome back. Crossed Reality September 10, 2002 11:50pm Going down... Crossed Reality September 9, 2002 10:41pm Considering the completely cryptic IM I got in the middle of last night, while I was sleeping, I think we can assume that Kitty Vertigo is a year older today. Either that, or someone named "Meow" was born about 3:30am. So, either happy birthday to Kenny, or welcome to the world Meow! Moving on from that, my new Picasso feature is online. It's gotten quite a reaction from my small test audience...let's just say it's much funnier if you try to pronounce it. In other site news, I suppose you can take the daily Picasso updates with a grain of salt. Why? Because this site is not going to be updated on Wednesday. In fact, I plan on essentially shutting the site down for 24 hours. This is the course of action I decided on after much thought. My original idea was to put up a serious feature discussing the day, but, well, it just wouldn't be right. So, on September 11, 2002, you will not have access to all the funny stuff here at Jux. Well, actually, if you're anal enough to remember the full URL you will, but the index and features pages aren't going to be here to help you. Crossed Reality September 8, 2002 10:29pm Okay, so it's not really a feature. But it shows what's coming this week. I plan to do one new Picasso comic every day this week. Not only that, put I plan to encourage everyone else to do something involving Picasso...it's not often I let go of him like that. We shall see what comes, no? Crossed Reality September 8, 2002 9:16pm Is it really this late already? Anyway, while looking at my early morning news post, I realized I had somehow managed to forget a very important game. So, let me be the first to say "Whoops", and then place it up here. I'm afraid there are actually a lot of games that I wanted to put up the box art for, but it hasn't been finalized yet. Such as Metroid Fusion and Panzer Dragoon Orta. Alas. The new feature for the night will be up in just a bit. Crossed Reality September 8, 2002 1:55am Makes you just want to reach out and hug someone, doesn't it? Crossed Reality September 7, 2002 8:59pm Shines: 118. The quest for the blue coins continues. There's also a new feature online that took longer than it looks like it did, I promise. Crossed Reality September 6, 2002 9:43pm Another day, another feature. Thank your lucky stars that I have next to no artistic ability, or today's offering would be quite disturbing to look at. Speaking of videogames, I'm up to 113 shines. If my assumption is correct, then that means that there are somewhere around 70 blue coins lying around levels that I didn't find yet. This should be...interesting. I hope to have managed to get the full 120 shines before September 17th, because that's when I get Kingdom Hearts. I get Harmony of Dissonance that day as well, but that's going to be an on the go sort of thing. I think. I wish I was getting Animal Crossing then, but, well, here's the thing. While I can afford it, I don't think I could enjoy it yet. With Star Fox Adventures coming out just a week after Kingdom Hearts, September is looking rather full. If you include me winning an auction for Tactics Ogre Advance, that's four games this month. And I don't play short little action games (often...stupid Onimusha series), so each of these requires a pretty big time investment. I doubt I'll have found all 99 dalmation puppies by the time SFA comes out, for example. The Advance games can be considered immune from this problem I suppose, since, by the very nature of their portability, they have an insane shelf life. Anyway, the point is Animal Crossing gets pushed back to October by moi, since that month is essentially dead. In other "Nintendo wants to eat my wallet" news, Metroid Prime and Fusion come out the same day! And I've got both pre-ordered! I'll already have the GBA link cable by then thanks to Animal Crossing, so I can't wait to find out how the games link up. One problem though. With the possible exception of Summoner 2, I can't think of anything decent coming out on the Playstation 2 that I don't already own after Kingdom Hearts. Well, Vice City will be good I'm sure, but I got bored of GTA3 so quickly that's not an option for me. Wait, does .hack come out before the end of the year? That's looking okay...won't know until it's out though. We'll see. Crossed Reality September 5, 2002 10:25pm *UPDATE* Crossed Reality September 5, 2002 2:21pm Two features tonight. One of them is technically yesterday's and will be marked as such, but I just got so distracted by things last night, this fell by the wayside. Sorry! Back later, after work. Crossed Reality September 4, 2002 3:47am I seem to have awakened for some reason. Wonderful. Anyway, I just popped in to say: Best. Spelling. Cell. Ever. Crossed Reality September 3, 2002 10:59pm First, let's get one thing out of the way. This is complete and utter bullshit. Anyway, so tonight was my first real day as a reference librarian. I know you were hoping for something of a tale of Graeme slaying evil questions with his purity of knowledge and enchanted Google sword, but...I pretty much solved computer problems. But I did it...with a vengeance! In site news, the ever-kidnapped Kenny has produced a new feature for you to peruse at your leisure. I've already got one written for tomorrow as well. A note to the impatient....HI REBECCA! THE FEATURE IS UP NOW! :D Crossed Reality September 2, 2002 10:42pm The new Picasso feature is now online. I hope you enjoy it immensely as I'm sure you always do. Tomorrow I begin working in my new position at the library, and the Members page was updated as such. Hopefully I won't have any horror stories to tell.... Crossed Reality September 1, 2002 9:35pm Feature Get! Crossed Reality September 1, 2002 9:09pm Shine!!! Yeah, so I've beaten the game now and am in the process of collecting all the secret shines. Some of these things approach Ninja Gaiden and Battletoads levels of difficulty. For example, remember those levels I mentioned where you don't have a water pack? Well, to get some of the secret shines, you have to do them again. They give you the pack this time, but you have to collect 8 red coins before a timer runs out. Some of this stuff is the hardest thing I've seen yet in this generation of games. Some of it is deceptively easy. I am going to force whoever designed the boating section of Corona Mountain swab the deck of the Queen Mary for eternity in Hell, though. He just deserves it. We do have a new feature coming tonight. I was going to post it now, but I have a few little things to do on the site before it goes up (Have to add a new month to the Features section, change a few things in the Members section, stuff like that) so expect about half an hour of delay. I'll put another news post up when the feature arrives. Crossed Reality August 31, 2002 10:41pm Feature is online! You know how to get to it. While I'm here, I should also mention that my work slowly continues on the Spelling the Vacuum redesign. You can check out the finished version of the archive here! Crossed Reality August 31, 2002 10:03pm Just to let you know, I'm working on a feature as we speak. We're also going to be putting up a few commentaries tonight, done by our little Gnome...she's quite helpful with the deficit. I'm up to 68 Shines in Super Mario Sunshine, and I can't think of enough things to say about the game. It takes skill. And, this is the strangest thing I can think of, despite not being set in the Mushroom Kingdom and having almost none of the old enemies, it feels more like an old-school Mario game than Super Mario 64 ever accomplished. And I love Super Mario 64. The only thing that really worries me is that some of the levels where you are left without your water pack make me feel like a pansy. I didn't realize this until one in particular. I had to do a triple jump and hit a very narrow, moving platform in the middle of nowhere. I did it on the first try and was damn proud. But what bothered me is that stuff like that used to be common place...but you get so used to that damn hover pack...oh well. Without the hover pack, this game would be impossible, so I'm glad that it's there. It just makes me feel a little bit soft. Anyway, I'm going to go back to working on the feature now. While I'm doing so, read this. I don't think their punishment was severe enough. Crossed Reality August 30, 2002 11:04pm Hey, you've got a new feature online! Alright! Dance! Play tetherball! Or, even better, just stare at Celes for awhile. Crossed Reality August 29, 2002 10:00pm The good news is that you have a new feature online. I don't think it's much of one, but, hell, it's there right? At least my training in my new job is done. I've gotten decently comfortable behind the new desk...although I still feel much more at home at my old one. Since I'm still working Circulation once a week, I haven't completely left it behind...but I will miss it. In other site news, we've become hopelessly, desperately behind in commentaries. I'm going to try to do some fire lighting under Zen and whip some other guest authors into helping, but if it gets desperate I suppose I'll do them on my own, despite the fact that goes against our rules. Now that I've gotten that announcement out of the way, it's time to go play with a fruit juice vomiting dinosaur! Crossed Reality August 28, 2002 10:24pm Bad news. There's no new feature today either. Let me explain. Classes began this week, as I'm sure you've picked up by now. This means I suddenly have a lot of reading [and since it's literature, I can't skip it like I can in other courses]. It's rather entertaining, but it does take up time. In addition to this, today was my first day of training in my new position. No, I have not left the library. Rather, I am an Assitant Librarian no longer. I've been made a Reference Librarian now. As a result of this, I am going to be working more nights, but I hope in the long run it won't affect the updating of the page all that badly, at least once I get used to the schedule. Now then, not only those two factors are present. If you check yesterday's lone update news post, you'll see a large image of the box of Super Mario Sunshine. This game is conspiring to take the rest of my free time away from me. I can't promise a new feature tomorrow, but I will try. If I fail, don't get too angry. Crossed Reality August 27, 2002 7:26pm Crossed Reality August 26, 2002 10:10pm Still my birthday. Well, we appear to have a new feature online. I've quite a nice rant for the news post tomorrow, about somet changes at work and how they might affect the site. Hopefully, it won't be bad news. I'm not quite sure if it is or not yet. I'll let you decide. Enjoy my new feature, it's the disheartening tale I was talking about. Crossed Reality August 26, 2002 12:30pm Happy birthday to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyway, man, the first day of classes was interesting. I don't have time now, but I've got a rather disheartening tale to tell later tonight...whoo boy. Crossed Reality August 25, 2002 8:34pm New feature and some commentaries are up. My birthday and the first day of classes are both tomorrow. Yeah? YEAH! Crossed Reality August 24, 2002 10:42pm I'm afraid that due to various busy things, there will be no update tonight. I'll make it up to you tomorrow. Err, probably. Crossed Reality August 23, 2002 11:16pm Well, shit. I was doing all of my back to school preperation junk and suddenly I realized that, gee, I had completely forgotten about doing a feature. And with this, I went into panic mode, trying my best to get you your nightly entertainment. I'm happy to report that I think I've succeeded. Err, sorta. It's obviously a rushed effort, but hopefully it will be funny enough to hold you over until tomorrow, when I plan to reveal the next Picasso feature, which has been long delayed at this point. I'm also well aware that we've been getting behind in commentaries lately. I broke tradition and did one myself, my friend Lauren [that's different from the Laurie that goes by Athena Falconess here, folks] said she would do some, and I'll get the ole` 9 tails after Zen for the others. And remember: if you don't know how sexual reproduction works, please don't breed. Crossed Reality August 23, 2002 3:59pm Remember children, washing cars sucks. Even if you're doing it in a flagrant show of water ban defiance! Kitty Vertigo August 22, 2002 10:07pm Hi. I am a Kitty and I need your help. You see, I am stuck in a tree.  What can I do to help, you find yourself asking yourself? Simple. Just send $1,000,000 to the following address. "The 3rd big tree on the left of the road". How will that help me? It is easy.  With $1,000,000 in small bills i will have plenty of cushoining to land on. Thank you for your time. Also, I have a feature up. Meow. -note: any money leftover after the cushioning will become property of the Kitty Crossed Reality August 21, 2002 11:15pm And one hour later, I stick my foot in my mouth and put a new feature online! Crossed Reality August 21, 2002 10:13pm To be entirely honest, I'm not sure if we're doing a new feature tonight or not. I had the weird idea after last night to do the "Big list o' Final Fantasy characters" and rank them, but that would probably piss quite a few people off. Especially Elliott, since Celes would only make #3. At any rate, I'm just not sure what the heck I'm doing tonight. Well, I have one idea... Crossed Reality August 21, 2002 4:18pm Click here, now. All I have to say is: Fuck yeah! Crossed Reality August 20, 2002 11:06pm Hello all! My new feature is online. I'm sure you've been waiting so impatiently for it, you could just burst. Or maybe you don't care. That would be mean spirited. Be ashamed. Edit: We seem to be having some server troubles. I'm setting an update script so that this will all get uploaded as soon as possible, but despite what the time says above, it may not be until after midnight eastern. Not much I can do about it I'm afraid. Crossed Reality August 20, 2002 5:54pm   Are you? Crossed Reality August 20, 2002 4:41pm Ah, voting day. Specifically, the primaries. I must go help decide which opponents will challenge and hopefully remove some of our fascist Democrats from office this year! I consider it a holy crusade. Back later with a feature ;) Crossed Reality August 19, 2002 11:37pm Consider today's feature a sort of Library People part 2. I had another feature planned, but this was such a funny even that I simply had to to say something about it here. Maybe you won't think it's funny. I don't care. To be there was to fight the eternal struggle of etiquitee versus laughter. Or something. Our traffic seems to have dropped off a bit from the record high levels that started when I set people off with my Xbox rant, and this bothers me. Sure, I plan for us to purchase another actual advertisement on another site soon, but that doesn't mean I don't like free traffic. So, in the name of Jesus, Brahman, Allah, Dionysis, Jupiter, Loki, Mephisto, Buddha, and even Quezacotl, I demand you spread this site to all of your friends. Otherwise, the lords above might cry. Do you want the god of wine to cry? I thought not. Crossed Reality August 18, 2002 10:54pm New feature. Today was hell, though. I might post the rant I just gave to someone about it here later. Let's just say it's funny reading. Crossed Reality August 17, 2002 8:31pm My new feature is now online. I really, really hope you like it. And might I say, it's good to be back! Crossed Reality August 17, 2002 6:29pm Alright, fuck it, vacation is over. I'm working on a new feature right now. It should be online before midnight...I hope...it also should be quite new and interesting for all of you. I'm afraid to say that Webcomic Survivor has been put on indefinate hold. I launched it at just the wrong time in my life it turns out, and as such, have no desire to touch it again at the moment. I'm going to add something to the commentary for it to state that while it may be revisited at a later date, it will be in a different form. Sooo, while on my mental holiday, I replayed Final Fantasy VII. And then I moved on to 8. The problem is, I'm about five hours into VIII, and I'm getting a different urge. You see, Final Fantasy X is the second best one ever made, and my second favourite as well. But I only got to play through it once, because I got five other games at the same time. So, the urge is telling me to replay it as a way to fill my last days before Super Mario Sunshine comes. Which means I'll get my Final Fantasy VIII replay in some other time. For the record, VI is the best, and I've beaten it more times than I care to admit...which is still half as many as I've been through Chrono Trigger. A few more random quotes to add to that record from the last two weeks or so that I just haven't found a place to put elsewhere. I must purchase one of those new Danger Hiptops. I know it's very sad, but I still laughed hysterically when I found out that Zen was not getting free POP3 email from his old ISP for over a year. Rather, they were still charging his family and they didn't noticed. And my day was made last Monday when my friend Rebecca asked "And this is what the game looks like when you're playing it?" when I was showing her Resident Evil on the GameCube. My response: "I am playing it." Crossed Reality August 16, 2002 11:52pm New feature online. I'm still not "back" though...Elliott Hoffman and Athena will be filling in over the next two days. Maybe the feature will explain, or maybe it will only confuse you further. Either way, I'm sorry, but writing things to make people giggle just isn't priority one right now. ZenZagg August 15, 2002 11:48pm As promised, we have yet another feature for you to consume. Kenny's camping trip adventure has been distilled and packaged for you in the Features section--also, I have added comments to all the new features. Graeme is still on his mental holiday from what I can tell, so for this brief time, Kenny and I are the most active members on the site right now. Be afraid. College starts back up in about two weeks, so things will either get twice as stressful or twice as organized...perhaps both :D. ZenZagg August 14, 2002 11:53pm While CR has been taking his "extended mental holiday" I have completed the other feature I've been sporadically working on--it's a comic this time, not a collage (Someone just said "yay!", I can feel it :D). Also, Kenny just got back from his camping trip, and he will have a feature related to it for tomorrow...somehow I feel like we're spoiling you all, with both Kenny and myself releasing features so close together :P, Enjoy. Crossed Reality August 13, 2002 11:34pm Whether you like today's feature or not, I think it speaks for itself. Well, I'm out of here for the moment. Ciao. Crossed Reality August 12, 2002 11:03pm I do apologize, but I'm declaring this "random mental health day". I hope you understand. I'll be back with day two of webcomic survivor tomorrow. Until then, I'm sure there's something in the archive you haven't read yet. Kitty Vertigo August 12, 2002 9:20am Kitty is going camping for a few days to practice my pouncing.  Lets hope I encounter a mountain lion to perfect my tech.  Oh, did you think i was going to mentino.. so.meinthm interesting? damnit. i spilled water on my keyboard in case you havnt noticed. Crossed Reality August 11, 2002 8:11pm My newest idea has arrived! Behold! Yes, I am giving cash to the comic of the winner. Yes, I do have an idea of how to make this fair. No, you can't know it yet. Cheers! Crossed Reality August 10, 2002 6:51pm So, I quickly realized that I didn't have enough material for a good Questions and Answers update, so I went with plan B. I took one of my ranting answers, and turned it into a full fledged feature. Surly Guy finally stands alone. Go check it out. Crossed Reality August 10, 2002 5:25pm Okay, so the day is about 3/4's over and I still have no clue what we're going to be putting up tonight. Generally, this is not a good sign. Athena sent me something I may use if I can't decide on anything, but we'll see. Actually, I'm pretty sure I'm going to finish up the new Surly Guy and Jesus love fest tonight, but I've learned not to promise anything along those lines. Mostly because I need to harvest an extra question or two from somewhere. It would help if you more of you people emailed me with, you know, questions. Oh well, no use for whining. While I'm ranting though, I would like to report that for some unknown reason I am now seven hours in to Final Fantasy VII. I started replaying it for no particular reason yesterday, right before I went to see Signs. And no, I am not going to explain what the update directly below this one means... Crossed Reality August 9, 2002 4:51pm I knew crows were smarter than dolphins. Sadam is a moron. I hate both of you girls, fuck you. I'm broken. Someone fucking fix me, whenever the hell it might be convenient. Ow. Crossed Reality August 9, 2002 12:15pm Yep...so...it's online. Forgive me. Crossed Reality August 9, 2002 11:23am I owe you a new feature today, don't I? Well, I'll see what I can come up with. I've got an idea or four. One of them is rather self serving. But since I'm not in an overly funny mood today, that's probably the one you'll get. If so, you'll take it and like it, you hear me! Crossed Reality August 8, 2002 10:02am Kitty Vertigo's new feature has arrived, and can be accessed by the lovely menu to the left. I'll be back to say more later. Crossed Reality August 7, 2002 10:10am Check this out. I get the strange urge to get a bunch of friends together, fly somewhere, and then immediately fly back, for no good reason. I wonder if they have international flights. Oh, and if you didn't notice, our Spelling ad has been changed ever so slightly. ZenZagg August 7, 2002 6:15am Finally! My new feature has been completed, it is the collage I've been working on for the past couple of weeks..."A collage?!" you say, "you've built up all this anticipation over a collage?!" and then I fling potting soil at you and tell you to stop whining and be glad I've sacrificed many good nights' sleep to complete this for you, you bad, bad person :D. I would have finished it earlier, but I am very busy with my job and the rest of the mechanisms of life (Graeme hates my schedule, as you probably can tell from the mean things he has said about me, :P). Soon college will be back in swing and my schedule will normalize (*joyous exclamation*!). Crossed Reality August 6, 2002 2:45pm Oh, I put this nice Spelling the Vacuum wallpaper up in the Downloads section. Go check it out. Crossed Reality August 6, 2002 9:27am Okay, my new feature is online. It's about the poor, overlooked inventions that no one cares about. With any luck Zen's features will be online tonight. Can't be sure, though. I'm probably going to do some site design today, but not for this one...that is if I'm not completely absorbed by Season 2 of the Simpsons. Thank the lord above for DVD. You know, I just realized I've never done a real Simpsons feature here on the site. I should probably remedy that at some point, but that's not going to be for awhile. We'll see what comes. I'll be back again later, natch. Crossed Reality August 5, 2002 11:34pm Zen has promised not one but two features for tomorrow. He apparently hit some snag that he didn't have time to tell me about. Normally I would reschedule my own feature that I had planned for release tomorrow to a later date, but I've got plenty of stuff waiting to be written so I don't see the point. That means you may just be getting three features tomorrow. That's not happened since, like, May. We'll see if it holds true, shall we? I certainly hope so. Zen does say he's sorry for another delay. And I'm sorry that I've been up for 20 hours and, thus, am just in no mood to write one in the next thirty minutes for you. But, hey, I don't see a promise to update daily anywhere on this damn site! Stupid tradition... Crossed Reality August 5, 2002 7:16am So we finally did it. We sold out. Well, not really, since we're doing it for free. Check out the kickass advertisement for Spelling the Vacuum overthere under our navigation menu. Now, that's only going to appear on the main page, so don't worry that much if you're completely anti-advertisement, but do us all a favor and click it, kay? Our pal Elliott could really use the traffic. Plus, look at how he kickassingly incorporated it into our site. And it's got the best character in it. How can you possibly lose? There will be a new  feature later tonight without doubt, I'm just not sure who's writing it or what it is yet. You see, I have to work tonight. Which usually really fucks up this site's time scale. By some miracle, this site has already obtained 1/4 of July's traffic in the first 3 days of August. And July was a huge month for us. I'm not entirely sure where it's coming from, and I don't care. Just keep it up. Tell your friends. Bring it on! I promise we don't disappoint. Much. Crossed Reality August 4, 2002 10:33am Picasso has returned, and you can find him hanging out on the features page. Doesn't this main page look weird now without it's Super Mario Week banner? It's amazing how quickly you can get used to something. I'm working on ideas for our next theme week, which will planned far more in advance than that one was. I'm also working on a special way of archiving them on the Features page, but that will probably never come to anything so I wouldn't look too hopeful. Or, let me rephrase that. Until we do a page redesign and incorporate some dynamically generated shit, I wouldn't be expecting that. So, I wouldn't worry about it anytime soon unless I get really bored. With school, women, and a Britannic sized game release schedule on the horizon beginning with none other than Super Mario Sunshine, breath holding would not be advised. So, it appears that Elliott is preparing to follow us into the "desperate need of more traffic" zone. Needless to say, since he helped us out back when we were still hosted on my ISP webspace, I want us to help him out now that we're on our own and independant and junk. In this spirit, I am offering him the choice real estate under our navigation menu on this main page for free placement of a skyscraper ad. Isn't that nice of me? Well, if he wants to take advantage of the offer we'll see how it works out. My only condition is that I have to approve it, natch. Crossed Reality August 3, 2002 11:24pm Don't worry folks, I'm going to grab Zen's ear and twist it like a school boy's until he apologizes to all of you for not doing his Mario feature today. Jilting bastard. Enjoy the archive on this, the last day in Mario week. Crossed Reality August 2, 2002 11:41am Kitty Vertigo's addition to Super Mario Week has arrived. Check it out on the Features page. No one is quite sure if Zen is actually going to finish one or not; there's no way of telling. At any rate, it's his birthday today, and he has reached 20. Let's have a big round of applause. Yay for clapping! Oh, and I have this nice system where I like to help where help is given, so, here's the deal. Since at least half, and probably much more, of our traffic is independant now and might in no way of even heard of Spelling the Vacuum, I have a favour to ask of you. I want you to click that link. That's right, the one to Spelling the Vacuum. While you're there, I want you to engage in delicious comicy goodness, but that's secondary. What you really need to do is click on the vote link and try and get Spelling higher on Top Web Comics. The month has changed, and the counters have reset. Our pal Elliott deserves your votational love! End whoring. Crossed Reality August 1, 2002 11:40pm Okay, my new feature is now online. Check it out over here. I also went to work on the Members page tonight. Not only did I add Elliott to our ranks of guest authors with the rank of Baron, I also added the real names of all our freelancers instead of just having their online aliases. They deserve it, the lovable bunch. Zen's birthday is in about 20 minutes... Crossed Reality August 1, 2002 9:51pm I just wanted to pop on and say that everything is on schedule for the feature tonight. I realize we've had a lot of delays this week due to various circumstances, but that trend has ended with July. Thank God. Crossed Reality July 31, 2002 11:59pm Whew. Okay, everything is taken care of now. Not only that, but the new feature by none other than the beloved Elliott Hoffman is now online. So far I think Super Mario Week has been a decent success, the only problems being the delays of certain features. And really, this is to be expected, since this was not a planned event. It just happened. Next time we do a theme work, we're going to have quite a bit of advance warning...live and learn, I suppose. You'll have a new feature tomorrow to ring in August, possibly two. Zen's birthday is on the "really soon" time table, and my own is on the "same day as the release of Super Mario Sunshine" platform, which means that August is busy busy busy around here. Actually, Athena's is right before my own, so add a third Jux birthday to the list. While I'm at this birthday listing thing, am I the only one that weirdly associates it with leveling up? Okay, well, I'll be back tomorrow. Which is when I'll add Elliott to the members page as a guest author too, since I'll have to talk to him about how he wants to be listed. Ciao. Crossed Reality July 31, 2002 10:08pm A few problems with various things. Bare with us here. Until further notice, this website is operating on American Samoan time... Crossed Reality July 30, 2002 11:30pm Okay, there's been a problem. I have the entirety of the text of Elliott's feature, but I lack the artwork. So it's going to be delayed for a few hours, but it will still be posted as a July 30th feature. Crossed Reality July 30, 2002 10:06pm You've got just a little bit longer to wait for Elliott's feature. Fear not, I promised it would be online, and I am not a liar. Until then, I'm going to discuss some current events. Osama bin Laden may be dead. Whee. Australia may...or may not...have successfully tested a scram jet today. If they did, it will be astounding news, but I can't help but think that you're performing tests a bit wrong if you can't tell if the damned thing is successful or not. And finally, what is with these damned pilot whales (big dolphins) in Massachussets? Some of them beaching themselves three freaking times. They finally had to kill them. I'm always amazed when this happens at all. The leading theory for why whales/dolphins strand themselves is because the leader gets disoriented and leads them all to shore. Now, these are highly intelligent creatures with advanced communication skills. I'm sure it's possible for a whale to get lost or confused, just like us humans can, but I find it hard to believe that there is nothing in whale/dolphin speak for "Yo Earl, ocean's that way buddy!" It just seems hard to believe than a creature so intelligent would be lead to its death so willing. Or, even if it happens once, beach itself three times in two days. My personal theory is that life in the ocean is pretty damn boring, so occassionally these animals get sick of it and try to commit mass suicide. Strangely, another human habit. ZenZagg July 30, 2002 3:48am I'm back again, if only for a moment. All this full-time 40-60 hour/week work is starting to drain me. I will rejoice when college starts back up again and I can have some free time for once (if that makes any kind of sense, :P). In other news, Elliott's new feature goes online tomorrow. Oh, and just so you know, we all know that Tails was a fox, but decided to let Athena use artistic license on this one...kinda, *grin*. Anyway, I have whipped up another wholesome and delicious 7-pack of commentary to fill the gaps in from the last batch of features. Speaking of features, I never did get to finish the one I'm working on. I am not a lying bastard for I never promised I would have it done on any date, just that I would be working on it. Nonetheless, you will have your meat! Please be patient; I haven't been able to slack off as much as I used to. I've been working at my job as well as renovating the guest house out back, and consequently have less time for working on features. Don't hurt me...please? :D Crossed Reality July 29, 2002 11:13pm Athena Falconess's Sonic versus Mario feature is now online. Before you go feast on that, I have a little story to tell. Apparently, my two weeks of hell got noticed by the mythical woman that is our Library director, because I walked into work tonight to be greeted by an unexpected, spontaneous and retroactive raise. This is the third such pay raise I've recieved since working there just over a year (I work for the county government. Try to figure out how rare that is.), but I at least had some inkling that the others were coming. This was just...random. Well, my NES is calling me, so I'll be off. This turned out to be a decent day afterall. How strange. Crossed Reality July 28, 2002 11:28pm Since Super Mario Week is going to be somewhere around 8 days long, today isn't going to have feature, as I'm sure you've noticed by now. Since most of our Mario features are going to be either longer or just more complex than what we usually do, I hope this doesn't bother you too much. And an aside to Lauren: Why is it the second I regain free time, you're never online? Crossed Reality July 28, 2002 9:43am So, are you quivering in anticipation as to what awaits you today in Super Mario Week? No? Well, that's certainly mean spirited. You should be drug behind a convience store and shot. At any rate, surfing random web comics, I stumbled across this particular one that fits me so much like a glove I just thought I'd share. As most of you know, I'm a writer. This website exists partially so I can vent my "wacky" side somewhere. While I think it works out well, and can be quite funny, it really doesn't show off my skills as a creator of fiction. Almost everything I write otherwise is deadly serious. Sure, there's some of my trademark humour built in to the style, but if it leaves you laughing at the end, then I haven't done my job well. Most people who have read some of my stuff can attest to this. I might even toss a bit of it online just to serve as juxaposition between what I write here, and what my "real" writing is. You might be more suprised than you think. Hell, I think it'd be worth it to put something online, copyright worries be damned, just to allow you people to experience a "Graeme Ending". Perhaps the single most distinctive thing about my style. We'll see what I can do. I didn't mean to ramble so overlong here, I suppose I'll go back to lurking in the GameSpot forums and reading web comics now. No one else is alive at 10:00 am on a Sunday. Well, other than Zen, but he's doing that whole "Sabbath on the wrong day" thing. Crossed Reality July 27, 2002 10:45pm Feature, baby. Crossed Reality July 27, 2002 3:00am Hey, look up. What does that say? Correct, it is Super Mario Week here at the Jux Entente! In anticipation of Sunshine's release a month from now, all of our features this week are going to have a Mario theme. Athena Falconess is working on the ubiquitous Sonic vs. Mario feature. Kitty is "thinking of something", and I've got a few tricks up my sleeve. Not only that, but our good pal Elliott from Spelling the Vacuum is going to whip something up for the celebration. I hope you enjoy this, the first, and I get the feeling not the last, theme week in Jux Entente history. Crossed Reality July 26, 2002 10:42pm Feature online. I've got something planned for tomorrow, too, although I'd like to get our now massive amount of back commentaries done while I'm at it. Time to get the Froggie Stick out of retirement. Do you like thorns, boys? Crossed Reality July 26, 2002 8:43pm Okay, so my plan for the day was for this to be my big social recovery day, where I went out with or called people that I hadn't had a chance to in the past two weeks because of the work schedule from Hell. Instead, I've spent about 20 of the last 24 hours in a sleep coma. On the plus side, all of my sleep backlog is now caught up. This means I'm in a much better mood than I have been for the last few days, but it also means that my two week structure of not seeing anyone face to face but my friend Samantha continues at least until tomorrow. Unless I decide to become completely nocturnal tonight, which has happened before, but I'm willing to let the theme of this day stand by doing nothing but lazing around here. With that said, I'm working on a new feature at the moment (hey baby), but it's likely to be another videogame themed one for you people. I hope that's okay. Oh, and since it's the 26th, I thought I'd let you know that it is exactly one month until Super Mario Sunshine, exactly one month until my first day of classes in the new semester, and exactly one month until my birthday. Yessir, the 26th of August is a big day this year. Crossed Reality July 25, 2002 10:33pm Would everyone please welcome Bobby the Deity back to our Features page? Thank you. Oh, and please don't ask what the hell happened to chapters 2-7. Crossed Reality July 25, 2002 8:19pm Have you ever wondered what P.T. Barnum could have done with modern technology? Isn't it scary? Well, my weeks of hell at work have come to an end. I am free again. Not only that, but my sanity might just be recovering from the severe hits that spending two days this week reading shelves for four hours dealt to it. Do you know what reading shelves is? That's where you put the entire library in proper order, by reading all the spines. All of them. With my free time back, I'll be writing more of my written features for the site, instead of resorting to doing the Picasso updates like I have recently. In fact, I was thinking of doing a certain...something...and the fact that someone mentioned it in an email lately has made me sure I will do just that. Zen has also promised me that he will finish his feature tonight, although I've heard that one before. I'm not sure if the long ass news post below is going to be archived in any way, although I might think of some way to do it. I sure as hell don't want to turn it into a feature. Perhaps I'll toss it into a Surly Guy and Jesus or something. And just to show you I have a sense of humour about the whole thing, even though I maintain my position of rooting out and destroying ignorance wherever it may take hold, I have created the following image with the el cheapo webcam for your enjoyment. Pictured: NES, SNES, N64, GameBoy, GameBoy Advance (Glacier), GameCube (Jet), two NES controllers, one second edition Zapper, two SNES controllers, one SNES mouse, one N64 controller, one Rumble Pak, two GameCube controllers (Jet, Indigo), one WaveBird. Not Pictured/Visible: First generation Zapper, memory card 59, memory card 251. Metric buttock load of games. Sure, I also have the Sony consoles, a few Segas, and the ancient megalith of the Atari 2600, but those wouldn't be funny to show, would they? Crossed Reality July 24, 2002 11:59pm Okay, I've removed the original newspost that was here with just a link to the new Picasso feature that's online and a bunch of profanity. I've decided to talk about something. The new feature is still online, of course, and it's "hidden" message there everyone else here is lazy is still mind numbingly true. But, I have a rant for you. I wasn't planning on addressing this here, but it's been bombarding me from everywhere lately, and a recent rant over at Penny Arcade has driven me to it. Go what read Gabriel said and come back. Why? Because I'm in complete agreement. Usually, if I have any sort of connection with those funny bastards, it's with Tycho, since our game tastes are much more similar. But, Gabe is spot on this time baby. Ever since one of my own friends became an Xbox fanboy (note: it is NEVER, EVER good to be a fanboy of ANYTHING...except Final Fantasy), my rage at this stupidity has been growing. Xbox games suck. It's that simple. Halo had repetitive, boring levels. Dead or Alive 3 had no gameplay, but hot chicks in less than amble clothing. Morrowind is better on the PC in the first place. And, here's the kicker, that's the entire roster of decent games for the system right there. Panzer Dragoon Orta is coming up, but I don't think we have to worry about it or any of Sega's other games remaining exclusive to the Xbox for long. Why is this, you ask? Because they sell like ass on the Xbox. That's right, the only decent developer the platform has, and they get lazy sales. You're dooming your own platform there, guys. They've already made Sonic, their biggest franchise, a Nintendo exclusive. Expect more to move soon. So why is it that with no decent games, or at least no must-own games, on the system, people keep buying it? It's because of this illusion of it being the most powerful console out there. This "buy the best" American attitude has been manipulated quite successfully here. This is also why the console doesn't sell as well in nations where the average person doesn't have an ego the size of a decent blimp. Now, not to remove credit where it is due, the Xbox does have more raw computing power than either the GameCube or Playstation 2. But if you know anything about computers, you know that end results don't boil down to who has the highest clock speed. Ever. Here's some specifications for you. The GameCube uses 1TSRAM as its main memory, the Xbox uses standard PC DDRRAM for its main memory. 1TSRAM is the same RAM that's used as on-board caches in CPU's. It is much faster than DDRRAM. Also, in the Xbox, all the memory is shared between the system and the graphics. This results in a performance loss since the graphics card is using the main memory all the time, sucking up bandwidth. That's not to say that the graphics used by the GameCube don't occasionally store information in the main memory, but this has to be done far less often, not resulting in the continuous performance hit. The GameCube can render 8 textures in one pass. The Xbox can do only 4. I'm not going to toss the math out here for you, but it all but makes games like Star Fox Adventures impossible on the Xbox. If you're still scratching your head, go make a pile of 100 very heavy rocks. Carry them to your house 8 at a time. Then, carry them back to their original location 4 at a time. Fun, isn't it? Likewise, the GameCube has quad layer bump mapping. The Xbox has only dual. See the rocks example above. The Xbox's CPU runs at a clockspeed of 733 MHz, the GameCube's at 485 MHz. Here is where people start to envision that clock speed means everything. However, the Xbox CPU is an x86 spec just like you can buy over the counter anywhere. The GameCube's CPU is a specially designed RISC processor. It also has twice as much onboard cache as the Xbox's CPU, resulting in a nice performance boost right there. What the two different design specs end up meaning is that the GameCube CPU can do much more work at a lower clock speed than the Xbox's could at the same speed. You have to remember that the MHz rating only shows you how quickly the CPU cycles, and not how much work the processor actually does in one of those cycles. That's how come a 900 MHz Macintosh is just as fast as a PC, and why my AMD 1.53 ghz system will out benchmark a P4 2.0 ghz. The Xbox uses a modified GeForce 3 for it's graphics processor. Another, essentially, over the shelf component. The GameCube's graphics card was specially designed by ATI for use in the GameCube. I've already gone over the extra hardware effects that this component is capable of without resulting to draining the main CPU, all of this evidence of the chip's newer design. The fact that the Xbox is based entirely on PC architecture is readily apparent above. It even uses a modified version of DirectX. This means that programmers already know the system inside and out, which is what has resulted in the graphics you see in games now. This also means they aren't going to get much better. There are few if any new tricks to learn here folks. You can get power cheap by using PC components, but as the good people at ASCI White found out recently, you inherit all of its problems as well. The GameCube was designed to be a gaming machine first and only. It has no bottlenecks. It's also not using parts that were originally meant to run Excel really fast. While the GameCube's games will continue, much like the Playstation 2's, to grow more impressive as time goes on, all of your Xbox games are basically 40th generation right off the bat. And finally, while the mini-DVD format holds less data than the full-sized DVDs used by the Xbox, it also has much lower seek times and faster data transfer rates. Load times practically don't exist on the GameCube. I have rested my case at this point. If there is a power gap, it's not going to mean jack shit. Perhaps you will be able to render an extra 30 polygon beetle. Meanwhile, you're still playing graphically enhanced versions of PS2 games that come out months later, while I've already played those on my damn PS2 and moved on to Zelda. Crossed Reality July 24, 2002 10:27pm All of this work crap has gotten me far too tired to do the rant I was planning at the moment. Zen's promised to finish his new feature tonight, so unless he's lying scum, I'll do my rant then, or sometime soon after. Until then, I'm probably going to rest. I did finish my next feature last night, but for various reasons I'm just not going to put it up yet. I'll be back soon. Tomorrow is the last day of this work hell I've been going through, which means you can expect Jux to get back to normal. I'm sure you're all excited. Crossed Reality July 23, 2002 9:19pm One good question is why I'm listening to Low Man's Lyric at the moment. At any rate, I just put a rather...special...guest commentary online. By an ex-girlfriend. On my perfect woman feature. More proof that I am true believer in free speech, I guess :) I'll post the results of, and answer to, the test later. It seems to be quite...positive. Crossed Reality July 23, 2002 7:54pm Okay, so now my new feature is online. I took it out for a test run last night, and the results where overwhelmingly positive in favour of this theory of mine. I knew it. So, go check it out...see how long it takes you to pass The Test. In other site news, Kitty IM'd me while I was sleeping with a plot line for Picasso that has so much promise, I'm actually going to do it. I'll toss his name in there to give him some credit when I do. Just remember, while the plot may be his, the jokes are mine baby. And the art. But that's not good. No sir. Not good at all. Well, I've got some dead animal flesh to go ingest, so I'll pop back on here with a real rant later. Like, whether or not Zen is going to get me his feature. Because he better. Toodles. Crossed Reality July 22, 2002 11:49pm Well, those of you paying attention saw my new Picasso feature go online about an hour and a half ago. And now, my second feature for the night is online. The new Q&A With Surly Guy and Jesus is here! Zen was unable to finish his new feature, as expected, so it gets to be tomorrow's. Which means I can take another day off from the feature production! I probably won't though, I have another idea brewing... Crossed Reality July 22, 2002 10:01pm Okay, I'll have my new Picasso feature online in just a few minutes. Zen seems to have disappeared, at least temporarily, but he was supposed to have a feature up today so if he gets back on before midnight I'll get on his case about it. I have to be back at work at 8:00 am (I just got off at 9:00), so I might not manage to do both the features I promised. I will try though. I also have another little html project to work on tonight sometime, although I'm not entirely sure if you will see the fruits of it or not. I have the feeling it will end up like the rounded corners project: where I get it to look right, then decide that I prefer the squared look and get rid of it before it's ever online. We shall see, no? I'll be back in a few. Crossed Reality July 21, 2002 11:46pm It seems like we've had quite a few of these no-feature days in July. While I can say I'm not at all worried about this becoming a real problem, I feel that I should explain that, as far as obligations go, July has been hell. Sheer, utter, HELL. That's my explanation for why we're all always so drained. Well, other than Kitty. He's just lazy. And proud of it. Damn, damn proud. However, and here's a promise, Zen is working on a feature now, and I am personally going to post two tomorrow. One of them is 90% finished, and I just don't have the energy to finish it tonight. The other is complete in my head, but has nothing in digital form. Consider it my way of making up for this week. If you're mad, blame the library. Speaking of the library, I've come to an interesting discovery: slightly more than half of the money required to run this site comes from GA tax payers. Wrap your brain about that. We're government funded! Crossed Reality July 21, 2002 9:20pm Feature? I have something to say about that. Crossed Reality July 21, 2002 3:53am Okay, I've recovered somewhat now. I worked 9 hours yesterday on 1.5 hours of sleep. When I got home at 5:00 I passed out almost immediately, woke up to write that short news post and eat about 10:00, then went back to sleep. I'm dreadfully sorry for the lack of a feature, but that just was not happening yesterday. I'm going to write the long belated third edition of Questions & Answers with Surly Guy and Jesus today, after I get home from work at 6:00. Luckily I don't have to go in until 1:30 today, so it works out rather well. Damn there are a lot of times in this news post. I did a new Picasso strip that goes along with the S.G. and J update just a few minutes ago. It will also be in the next Picasso feature, whenever the hell I do that. This strip officially contains my favourite panel ever now, at least for the next few hours while I'm still partially sleep deprived. Check it out below. As a final note, Friday is officially our new record traffic day. Many block parties are expected in the city of Canton to celebrate the event. Crossed Reality July 20, 2002 10:28pm So very tired. No feature. Graeme sleep now. Crossed Reality July 19, 2002 7:41pm Well, I've placed my new feature officially online now. The things I think of when I sleep are scary, aren't they? I never ended up going to Six Flags today, because going alone just isn't an option. I'm aiming for next week at this point, hopefully next friday not only will I not be working, but other people won't be as well. Wouldn't that be nice? I have decided that I simply must get one of the new R300 Radeons when they come out, despite the fact that I'm not normally a PC gamer. I can't really explain it, but just reading about the thing makes me all happily giddy. Of course, it's also $400, which means I likely won't be getting one the moment they come out. School starts at almost exactly the same time, so I'm shooting for a 60 day window. Maybe by then they'll have announced an All-in-Wonder based on it or something. As for what I'll actually do with the thing when I have it...probably just stare at it. And smile. Or wait for World of Warcraft, that would be nice. Speaking of Warcraft, I'm in a gaming lull at the moment. While Warcraft III is still greatly entertaining, the next game that comes out that I have to buy is Super Mario Sunshine, on August 26th. Which just happens to be my birthday. It also just happens to be more than a month away. I'm not sure if battle.net can keep my interest that long, but at least it means I'll have more money in the bank. Jeez, two long ass rambles in one day. Just go read the feature, and I'll be shutting up. Oh, and Athena Falconess is going to be tossing some commentaries online for us tonight, which is very nice of her. Crossed Reality July 19, 2002 6:39am Well, there's a new feature uploaded at the moment, but I won't be linking to it until later. Can't take the wind out of the sails of my other, less than 12 hours old, feature, now can I? If any of you want to go hunting with random typing, go for it. I actually quite like what I came up with after a brief delusional nap more than that...thing I wrote last night. But that's what working all the damned time will do to you. So, yeah, I was going to use my one day off until next Friday to go take in some Six Flags Over Georgia time today, but for whatever reason I neglected to remember that everyone I know is either working or in some far flung location that may or may not exist. Actually, I'm pretty sure that Florida is Hell, and I've been there enough to know that that one is real, but can anyone prove to me that Nebraska is a real state? I suspect that the land is there, and the border is clearly marked, but it is inhabited only by hamsters and the things that prey on them. Maybe some voles. It could use some voles. In all honesty, I can look at a list of the 50 states right here on my computer, just to make sure I'm not overlooking one, and I either know someone from, have visited myself, or had someone I know very well spend a significant amount of time in, 49 of the bastards. But not Nebraska. Is this some conspiracy? I know people from freaking Wyoming for Christ's sake. I should probably get a little more sleep. Did you know that the almighty Whitie can smell his salmon cat treats all the way across the house? Just opening the damn package is far more effective than calling his name is ever going to be. I had no clue I was going to ramble on this long. I could start singing. Would you like me to start singing? Somehow, I don't think it would go over too well. Hmm, sleep or get my ass kicked in Warcraft III. The choice is astounding difficult. Crossed Reality July 18, 2002 11:04pm Okay, my new feature is online. Be happy. I'm sorry that isn't up to our normal standards (at least, I don't think it is...because it's just far too short), but as you know I've been working until 9:00 every damn day this week. That drains your sanity rather quickly. Believe me. So much so that I'm actually going to bed before midnight, meaning that hell has, in fact, frozen over. Crossed Reality July 18, 2002 4:21am If you're reading this, that means that I have finished re-uploading the entire site. I finally finished converting all the code for the pages to what I've dubbed "Jux 1.2", which, if you've not been paying attention, fixes our menu overlap problem. Now, so far as I know everything went perfectly in the transition for all of the features and articles, but if you do happen to spot a misplaced title or broken link anywhere, please let me know. I would greatly appreciate it. I'm working again today, but I assure you a new feature will be waiting for you somewhere after ten. As for my magical day off tomorrow...I'm going to Six Flags. Whee-hah! Crossed Reality July 17, 2002 9:52pm Well now, my new feature is online. It's a brief but humourous look into my life as a librarian. I felt like venting a little bit, so sue me. So, enjoy that while I convert the information articles and our main features to the new Jux 1.2 format. I'm going to try to get at least the majority done tonight, so I don't have to worry about it anymore. Yeah. Stuff like that. Crossed Reality July 17, 2002 4:18am Okay, I worked a little bit, and now all the portal pages are converted to the new code. All the features and articles in the information section will be tackled tomorrow. I'm going to sleep now. Crossed Reality July 17, 2002 2:51am This page should look the exact same to you. But it's not. Since the beginning of our current design, we've had a problem where the navigation menu would overlap the main body of the page if your resolution or window size was too small. Tonight, I finally found a way to fix it that wouldn't change the look of the site. This index page has been converted to this new code. Tomorrow, I'm going to update all the major pages at the very least, and begin the rolling update that will eventually convert all the old features to it. The only page I'm probably not converting at the moment is the news archive, because that this is freakin` huge. At any rate, any new features will naturally be posted in the new format. So, all of you out there who had to deal with the magical superimposing navigation table: your prayers have been answered. That means you, Lauren. :P Crossed Reality July 16, 2002 11:53pm I made it! I made it! WHOOOOOOOOO! Yeah, my new feature is online. Go check it out on the Features page and be merry, while I recover from work. Kitty Vertigo July 16, 2002 11:14pm Meow everyone. I am bored and sad. My Kitty doesn't have a bumper anymore. Girls suck. And this hurts.     Anyways, CR said that he will have a feature up sometime before midnight, but I don't believe him. I am going to go climb a tree or something. Meow. Crossed Reality July 16, 2002 2:01pm Well, I just woke up. There goes most of that day. I finished most of a new Picasso feature last night, but unfortunately I was forced to stop production when my ISP decided it wanted to do service maintenance for two hours. It will be online once I get back from work tonight. In other news, I believe the following CNN article is required reading, because it is hilarious. On the one hand, I'm sick of everyone suing everyone else. But, on the other hand, I really don't care if those places lose money. It's not like nothing short of an act of many, many different religion's Gods is going to get the industry to shut down anyway. Crossed Reality July 15, 2002 11:23pm Warcraft 3 rant: My how I hate battle.net. Aside from service outages giving me two instant losses that make my record look far worse than it really is, I just don't seem to be able to get competitive at the moment. I'm not saying I'm horrible, but I'm nowhere near good, and that doesn't seem to be changing, which sucks. Part of it is that I've not settled into a build order/strategy that really agrees with me at the moment. I refuse to read strategy web sites though, because that's "cheating". I guess I'll just watch my replays and try to bring things together a bit more. It would help a lot if the auto matching service would quit tossing me against people who are level 7, but I digress :) Site rant: I'm a much better mood now, so I'm going to see if I can't whip up a feature to post just after midnight. Aren't I nice? If you've guessed that I'm just attempting to do anything other than get schooled on battle.net some more at the moment, you would be correct. Crossed Reality July 15, 2002 10:04pm Okay, so the FAQ has been updated now. Check it out in the Information section, especially if you're new to the site and have no clue what's going on. I also just found out that I'm working next Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday as well, so...yeah, I'm going to be busy :) Crossed Reality July 15, 2002 2:31pm Prepare for a long news post. Are you ready? Good. I had one of my damn reverse nightmares last night. Now, some of you haven't heard me babble before, and thus, don't know what a reverse nightmare is, so I'll explain. It's when you have a dream so good that waking up makes the rest of the world look like utter shit. That's probably the best way to describe it. At any rate, that's where I am right now, because I'm an emotional, moody bastard who can't just pull out of these things. But, moving on, welcome to the beginning of Graeme's hell week. I'm working until 9pm every single day except friday until next Tuesday, starting today. As such, while I will be writing features mostly as normal, they will be posted far later at night. I also won't be doing one tonight, because I'm going to work on a few site structure things instead. And probably update the FAQ, that would be nice wouldn't it? I'll see if anyone else has any plans for a feature for tonight, but I wouldn't hold you breath. Crossed Reality July 14, 2002 10:23pm Hey, remember what I said about an hour ago about not finishing my new "How Stuff Works"? Well, it's online now, so I'm obviously either a liar, or someone who realized he really didn't want to draw anything tonight. Make your own choice. Crossed Reality July 14, 2002 9:37pm Whoah. Just...just whoah. I have returned from the movie Road to Perdition, and I am stunned. I was expecting it to be worth my time, but not, how shall we say, excellent. I've not seen a movie that good in a long time, and I see a lot of movies. The only problem is that it appears to have knocked all the funny right out of me, which is unfortunate since I was working on a new feature before I left. Hopefully I'll still get one up tonight, but now that is no longer a sure bet. I was writing a new "How Stuff Works"; I think I might just switch to doing a Picasso update. We shall see, no? Crossed Reality July 14, 2002 12:22am Okay, so, our ad is up on 8-bit College now. Huzzah! I'm going to continue to look for other places to drum up traffic. Cheaply, of course, since this is just a hobby. At any rate, if you're here because of that link, let me extend a hello. We'll try and entertain you while you're here. The meat of the page is in the Features section, which includes boatloads of funny stuff and a few select serious pieces we've written here at Jux. Don't worry, they're clearly marked. If you want to know what the hell this page is, check the FAQ in the Information section. If you want to know how to contact us to ask questions or complain loudly, that would be the Members section. I'll be shutting up now. Crossed Reality July 13, 2002 11:02pm Victory! Crossed Reality July 13, 2002 7:15pm In the grand tradition of our first video feature, comes our first audio feature. It's craptacular! Go check it out while I use my new hippogriffs to teach lord Archimonde a lesson or 12. Crossed Reality July 13, 2002 5:39pm So, yeah, hello. New feature? I'll do something really lazy in a few minutes, because I'm almost to the end of the single player campaign in Warcraft III (Taken me long enough, damn this is a long game.) Which means I'll finally get to play online and make maps. Oh, and if you were following my progress in a certain other game, Emperor Bulbax went down like a mofo. He just took a lot of my red Pikmin horde with him. Crossed Reality July 13, 2002 3:23am In my continuing efforts to make this page better, I have just spent some time with the Members page. Specifically, I removed the useless description box at the top, I removed the trillian comments and our computer specs. I updated my biography to be more clear and current in some areas. Oh, and I changed Kitty's occupation from "Bum" to "Making things with duct tape." And if you look at the very bottom, you will see that I've decided to grant our dear Athena Falconess a rise in status. She is now a Viscountess instead of a Baroness, which I'm sure she'll be just thrilled about. Now then, do I have anything else to rant about...Night Elves rule? Oh, yes, since I'm still planning on taking an advertisement somewhere, and I've narrowed it down to where now, I went ahead and made the banner using some of the art from the feature I did tonight. Scaled down, natch. So, here it is.  Crossed Reality July 12, 2002 11:15pm My new feature is here! Barely on time! :) Okay, so Zen's mother and step father read his Untitled piece, and apparently they weren't too happy about it. This is what happens when you say things in a public forum, I suppose. Well, here's my two cents: Everything in that document is true. And if they're reading this, I don't give a damn what they think of me, but I'm just really happy that Zen managed to say what he meant for once without worrying what other people thought. If you don't like it, you can eat it, I could care less. In real site news, per my own whim and Zen's request, the Favourites box in the Features section has been updated. Enjoy at your leisure. Crossed Reality July 12, 2002 1:05pm I'll work on the feature later. Tycho is funny. Elliott is not. Crossed Reality July 12, 2002 1:35am Where to begin? First of all, Warcraft III is so good, it's almost changing my mind on the state of PC gaming. Almost. I can't wait to crack the editor open for the thing, but I can't do that until I beat it. Wouldn't you like to see some Jux Entente maps? I know I would. In other game news, that Emperor Bulbax bastard in Pikmin frustrates me to no end. The difficulty level of that thing is so out of skew with the rest of the game, but, then again, I don't think you're really expected to collect all 29 parts in the other areas by day 25 the first time through...this is what I get for being an anal rententive bastard, no? You will get a new feature today (the 12th) from me, I promise this time. However, I think I'm going to write about just where the Picasso comics that I do for this page came from, because they've got a history. A long one. Plus, it will give me a chance to use those nifty happy balloon images again. As a final note, I'm watching you Elliott. I don't care if you live in Iowa, I will kill you. Crossed Reality July 11, 2002 12:22pm Well, I obviously didn't find anything to say last night, so you didn't get a second new post or a feature. However, if you take a quick jaunt over to our Features page now, you'll see that we have a brand new Kitty Vertigo rant for your eye scanning pleasure. How's that, then? :) Crossed Reality July 10, 2002 1:43pm Just in case you didn't notice, and I know you didn't, Zen popped on last night and filled in all of the missing commentaries. Is he not sweet, folks? At any rate, you might get a new feature tonight, but I can't promise anything. Times, they've been a busy lately hoss. I'll probably be back later to inform you one way or another. Oh, and it's official now. I declare Warcraft III better than StarCraft, and a worthy successor to the game that was my favourite PC game of all time. So, if you're not one of the 5 million or so people who preordered it (remember: selling 500,000 copies is great...for a PC game. Merely decent on a console.), you need go get it now. Crossed Reality July 9, 2002 8:31pm My new feature is online, and it's Surly Guy and Jesus, back for more antics. Check it out, you know you want to. Athena Falconess lended a hand with this one. Now then, I'm going to go play games until my brain bleeds. I still quiver when I see the Warcraft III opening movie. Crossed Reality July 9, 2002 10:14am Later tonight you're going to get a new feature, so keep that close to your heart. Now, for some other news, and ranting. I picked up a WaveBird for my GameCube last night, and the thing is astounding. That's about the only thing you can say about it, it is astounding. If you own a GCN and have any reason to buy an extra controller, I highly recommend it, even if it is $30. Another event: I strolled by the CAP website for the first time in a few months today, better known as that damn christian movie reviewer. At any rate, this is the only website that has ever managed to offend me and entertain me at the same time. Offend me because of some of the things they decide to nitpick about. Entertain me because they're morons. Not because of their beliefs, but because of what they want to do. They're, essentially, attempting to deny reality. Any attempt at realism in a movie pisses them off. Well, they really offended me today with their review for Lilo and Stitch. It loses points for having a description of evolution in it. Why does this offend me? Because the little girl also practices a rather violence form of voodoo in the movie, and that's mentioned no where. So, to these christian science nuts who really should be Amish at this point, attempting to caustically burn your friends via voodoo is a-okay, but discussing something about the way we got here...nix it. Hell, Minority Report loses points for having "precognition throughout". Okay, yeah buddy. The bible doesn't have any of that in there, no sir. How is it possible to walk with your head that far up your ass? Do these people have enough spare brainpower to control their heart beat and breath at the same time, because it seems like it would be taxing. Crossed Reality July 8, 2002 3:16pm Well, my new Picasso feature is online. Aren't you so excited? I know I am! Don't take me word for it though, go check it out on the Features page, while I prepare for work. I will attempt to place large amounts of heat under ZenZagg's buttocks later so that we can get some of these back commentaries done. Crossed Reality July 8, 2002 1:13pm I'm almost done with a new Picasso feature, which will go online sometime today, perhaps after I get back from work. It's slowed down here again lately, but that's because of lots of work, and lots of new games, which suck away my time. At least you've not gone a day without news, right? That makes me a good person, right? Oh well, while you wait for us to do something, go check out the day's Staccato comic, which I find hilarious. Before anyone asks, no, I cannot tie a tie. So shoot me. Crossed Reality July 7, 2002 2:27pm Yes! A new feature is online! Go to the Features page and check it out. You knew I'd come through eventually, right? Crossed Reality July 6, 2002 9:44pm It was another busy, busy day here at the Jux Entente. As such, I'm afraid you get no new feature tonight. I swear on my word of honor that tomorrow you will. But, hey, let's have a round of applause for ZenZagg, who finally managed to snag his driver's license today. We knew you'd do it before you turned 20...less than a month to go though. Close call :P Crossed Reality July 5, 2002 7:38pm So, yeah, I implied that there would be a new feature online tonight. Apparently I lied, because some friends are coming over to kidnap me for some hardcore gaming. Whoops. At any rate, I do apologize, and to make up for it, I spontaneously designed another Picasso "cast" image, this time for our beloved blind friend. Crossed Reality July 5, 2002 1:16pm I don't really have anything to say at the moment, so, instead, I thought I'd just put up this picture of Zen which he took when he finally got that security camera he bought in working order. Impressive, no? I actually scaled it down a bit for use here. At any rate, with luck you'll have a feature tonight, so wait for it patiently like the good people you are. We're going to be taking out an advertisement somewhere soon, but we'll warn you when that happens. Hopefully the traffic boost will be significant, at the very least. A man can hope. Razors scare me Crossed Reality July 4, 2002 8:46pm I just realized something. I've used a certain character twice in my online Picasso comics, a character from my elementary school days much like Picasso himself, without revealing her name. The funny thing is, when I did these silly things for my friends back in 5th and 6th grade, she was the star, and everything was based around her. She's only had one line of dialog in the online versions. In fact, the character that has seen the most action online other than Picasso himself is none other than the beloved Unnamed Blob, who was literally introduced in the Dead Jux Day strip because I couldn't think of anyone for Picasso to be talking to, and I left him unnamed and addressed him as such to accent the fact that I was being lazy. I ended up using the character again, which I had not intended, so now Unnamed Blob is his name. At any rate, I'm going to try to use my old character more, because she's almost as unique as Picasso is himself. So, without further ado, you can look below to see the name of this character. Oh, and contrary to what the image may suggest, she's actually an evil bitch, as should be evident by how she attacked the cattle in the great battle sequence. Crossed Reality July 4, 2002 8:12pm Okay, in the past three days, my preorder for Warcraft III has been processed (and thus, I officially bought the game), and I won extremely el cheapo auctions on brand new copies of Okage: Shadow King and Pikmin, two games I missed during the Christmas rush last year. I had too many games to get as it was. I think those three should be enough to fill the gaming drought between now and my birthday, when Super Mario Sunshine is released. Yes, it actually comes out on my day of birth. Neat, huh? All of my July 4th activities have come to an end now. Drat. :) Crossed Reality July 4, 2002 10:32am Well, here you are. My new Picasso feature can be found linked on the Features page. As you can see, the "new feature" button images have been removed. I consider them a failed experiment. Actually, they're just on a temporary and indefinite leave until I figure out a better way to accomplish what they were meant to do. Hopefully, they won't be missed all that badly. Enjoy the feature, and the fourth. Crossed Reality July 4, 2002 8:43am Hey, it's July 4! What does this mean to you? It means that CR has Warcraft III, and America's Army (out of sheer morbid curiosity, but it's suprisingly good), and I'm going the barbecue today. So, and this is just a hunch, there might not be a new feature up tonight. I do have about 1/3 of a Picasso feature done, so I might end up finishing that later, but I'm not going to promise anything. Hell, you should be out celebrating the nation's birthday as well. Or, if you live somewhere else, regretting that fact. Unless it's the United Kingdom. Go Britain! Crossed Reality July 3, 2002 9:42pm So yeah, I'm back from work. And the Powerpuff Girls movie ruled. I highly, highly recommend it. I also love how it describes their naming process. Blossom was named Blossom because she's open. Bubbles because she's bubbly. Buttercup, because it also starts with a b. No wonder she's surly. Oh, and I think I fixed the overlap problem with the buttons on the left in 800x600. Sorry about that. Crossed Reality July 3, 2002 7:06am Well, it's a little later than the 'last night' I promised, but we do have a new feature online. Believe it or not, it's by Kitty Vertigo. The button is to the left, and of course it's also linked on our Features page. I'm off to see a movie later today...barring acts of God, Allah, Buddha, and the rest of the menagerie, it will be the Powerpuff Girls. I'm not done updating the FAQ yet, but that will appear later today, I promise. I have to work tonight so I'm not sure what you can really expect to see online before 9:30pm or so, though. Just be hopeful. Hopeful is good for you. Makes you strong like bull, maybe even strong like Ugthor! Réalité Croisée July 2, 2002 7:40pm Some site news: Kitty Vertigo has graciously come out of retirement (do you realize it's been 17 days since you've done a feature? Hot damn!) and provided commentary on Q&A With S.G. And J, How Stuff Works: Food, and I'm A Feature! Also, I'm probably not going to do a real feature tonight, but I am going to tweak the FAQ again. I've been thinking of purchasing some advertising space on one of the web comics I read so much to try and get us some more exposure. Why a web comic? Because I think they need the support of the funds, I like them, and we get something in return...traffic! After all, how many of you are here because of the Spelling the Vacuum link button? That's what I thought. Of course, there is the hypocritical part where I plan to veto any attempt to ever place banner ads on this page, but if they've decided to whore themselves out, why not take advantage? That's what I thought. Crossed Reality July 2, 2002 11:14am To begin, I would like to have every give a round of applause for Steve Fossett, who finally became the first person to ever circumnavigate the globe solo via balloon today, after six attempts. Go Steve! Also, to answer someone's question about my first news post yesterday, no, I did not actually preorder Warcraft III when I was in elementary school. When I was in elementary school, Warcraft II was still some Blizzard employee's wet dream. Just how old do you think I am, exactly? To further clear the record, I did in fact ride my pet pterodactyl to school. I called her Dexie, and we were best friends. Then one day she ate my neighbor's, uhrm, son. Yeah. They put her to sleep. I was sad. Sometime later today I'm certain you'll have some sort of content to peruse, I'm just not sure what that would be, yet. Finally, has anyone else noticed that SmarterChild has gone missing? I attempted to investigate this matter, but my sources were acting quite suspicious. CrossedReality: where is smarterchild? AgentReuters: This is Agent Reuters, built by ActiveBuddy, Inc.    Ha. I really don't know.  I dunno. CrossedReality: no, really, where is smarterchild? AgentReuters: Hmm... I don't know!  Possibly... I'm not quite sure! CrossedReality: WHERE IS SMARTERCHILD? AgentReuters: Is smarterchild? I dunno... Crossed Reality July 1, 2002 2:06pm Well, I was going to wait until after I got back from work to post it (to write it, actually), but here it is. My newest feature, and our first from our fourth month of existance, is "Questions and Answers with Surly Guy and Jesus", which can actually be shortened to an amazing string of characters as its link button shows. At any rate, check it out and see what you think. We're up to six features without commentary, and I'll try to get at least three of those rectified later. I'll try to get all six, actually, even if it does involve a little rule breaking. Oh well, enjoy the feature. Crossed Reality July 1, 2002 9:24am So this is July. Are you preparing to celebrate the love of your country by blowing up a small part of it like I am? This is shaping up to be an interesting week. Movies coming out (not Men in Black 2: I spit upon that one), holidays to celebrate, lots of other stuff. I'm on my third run of Eternal Darkness now, which means I should have everything unlocked by the end of the day. It has become one of my favourite games of all time. Well done Nintendo, well done. Speaking of games, the collector's edition of Warcraft III that I preordered back when I rode a pterodactyl to elementary school ships tomorrow. In a word, yay. In site news, I've got a new feature coming out later today when I get back from work, so you can look forward to that. Also, according to our site reports some browser called "Bumblebee" has been consistently accessing our site. I don't have a damn clue what bumblebee is. Whoever you are, will you please email me and tell me? I'm kinda curious. Crossed Reality June 30, 2002 7:08pm Just a quick update: we're finally listed on Google. Yay. Crossed Reality June 30, 2002 10:16am For the first time since the end of the Contest of Champions, there's a new feature online that I actually wrote! Filming doesn't count. At any rate, check it out by going to the Feature page or clicking the nice button...because you know you want to find out how Food works! We'll be back later today with something, I'm sure. I'm about halfway through my second trip through Eternal Darkness, and that must be attened to promptly. Crossed Reality June 29, 2002 5:04pm We've got something new here on the Entente. If you look just below our navigation, you will see nifty icons linking to our newest features! These will change as the "Latest Features" section on the Features page changes, and will be direct links to whatever new we have. As to where the icons will go once the features lose their shine...well...I'm not quite sure yet. But aren't they pretty? ZenZagg June 29, 2002 12:56pm While Graeme has been immersed in the world of Eternal Darkness, I have been busy with my job and whatever else steals my time away from here. Never fear, however, for I come bearing gifts! My new contribution, "Buddy Ex Machina" can be found on the features page. In this feature I explore the labyrinthine, squishy depths of the mechanical mind...kinda, :D. And I do spend a bit of time on my title images, but its a labor of love--I mean, look at the detail I put into the beer bottles, those were full when I started with 'em! *burp* :P Crossed Reality June 29, 2002 4:02am Well, Zen finished a new feature, but rather than email it to me he decided to try to filesend it while I was asleep, which didn't work out too well. So, you're going to have to wait awhile longer. Sorry about the slow week, but, well, everyone has been quite preoccupied with about a dozen other things. It'll pick up next week. Of note is the fact that in the news post he wants up here, Zen mentions how his title images take longer than his features. This should be a hint as to why the rest of us don't do them. I do have a feature planned to break this lull of a week myself, and I might get around to writing it tomorrow, although I can't promise anything. My writing lately has been dominated by a story I'm roughly calling Zero, which I started just about two days ago as a sequel to a novella I wrote about a year and a half ago. Sure, I had to change the ending of the original story to fit the new one, but since it was never published, I don't much care. The Entente will be back later today with a feature or something, until then, I'm going to go fight the Eternal Darkness. Crossed Reality June 28, 2002 12:45pm Well, I'm obviously not the only one who picked up on the massive Lovecraftian influences in Eternal Darkness. Tycho wrote a rant today on the exact same subject. Crossed Reality June 28, 2002 12:46am What the hell happened to Thursday? Crossed Reality June 26, 2002 11:59pm (really! I swear I'm not posting this later, just so I don't have to see a dead day in the features section!) New Feature up. More important? I got my hands on Eternal Darkness. A survival horror game, heavily influenced by the works of H.P. Lovecraft, where I get to play as historical figures? I think they're tapping my dreams. Crossed Reality June 26, 2002 6:55am So, yeah, I disappeared yesterday. Don't worry, you'll probably get a new feature tonight! Unless, of course, Eternal Darkness is waiting for me when I get back from work. In that case... Crossed Reality June 25, 2002 8:48am 1989? AAaaaaaaaghhhhhhhh. I know people born after this movie was made! I saw this in the theatres! Jeez, I can't wait to see how depressed I am when I'm 40. I think I've started my mid life crisis at 18. Crossed Reality June 25, 2002 7:59am Talk about strange urges. I'm currently halfway through The Little Mermaid. I'd forgotten a few things about this movie. One: When your age isn't a single digit, Ariel is hot. Two: This is the last movie to use Disney's "old" visual style. You can see a direct progression from Snow White to the Little Mermaid. However, pop in Beauty and the Beast or Aladdin...much, much different. Now that disney has even abanonded it's old formula (the Emperor's New Groove, Atlantis, Lilo and Stitch...new age Disney.), this movie seems even stranger. I remember when this thing was new. Damn, I'm getting old. Ancient. Back later. Crossed Reality June 24, 2002 10:27pm I have witnessed a miracle. I was really worried about registering for classes today. I had picked out what classes I needed to take about a week ago, as some of you will no doubt remember, and some of them were only offered in a few times, one class had only a single session this semester. Since I was a freshman last year, I got used to fighting my way through registration because we were so late in the process. I was expecting to find most of my classes full today when I went to register. To make matters worse, not only was my time pretty late in priority registration, it was today while I was at work!  I wrote down the computer numbers of the schedule I worked out as what I really wanted, and I took that to work with me. I figured I would get into as many of them as I good there, and then spend the time fixing the schedule later at home. Much to my surprise, when I logged in and started adding the classes...they were all open. I registered in less than two minutes. I'm very scared, things like this aren't supposed to happen. So, my perfect schedule [for now, at least] is complete. I would like for everyone at home to pray for Zen, since he got royally shafted on his registration time...it's tomorrow! :) Crossed Reality June 24, 2002 7:51am Some more CNN goodness for you. Click here for their newest analysis of what is occurring in Israel. Crossed Reality June 24, 2002 6:21am Day Four of the Contest of Champions is now online, in the Features section. I would personally like to thank Nickelodeon for loaning us Bob the Builder. Without him, I don't think our contest would have had the celebrity edge that made it such a success. In other, random news, one of my old friends who I hadn't talked to in awhile called this site, in essence, an online journal. That scared the hell out of me. We're not aiming to create anything like those pity and ego festivals. Well, maybe the egos. If anything, I see our site veering more towards becoming a clone of the Brunching Shuttlecocks than anything else. Not that we're trying to emulate anyone, especially since we post serious content as well, something Brunching doesn't do. I'm not sure what I want this site to be. Hell, I'm not sure if we've even really thought about it. I'd love for this place to be half silly playful crap, half political debates and historical discussions. Of course, I live and breed in the study of languages, history, politics, theology...anything that falls under the "Social Science" category. This would drive Kitty and Zen up very tall trees. Basically, I don't think we can be compared to much of anything at the moment, because we have no clue what we're going to be. The fact that this is a joint project is very good for you, because you have my anal-rentitive work ethic (I can seem amazingly lazy, but if something that I feel is my responsibility is being left untended, I freak out) to keep the page updated daily, Kitty's frivilousness to keep me from debating the news from the middle east in great detail, and Zen as the magical middle ground. Essentially the swing vote that keeps things balanced. Oh well, enough rambling, enjoy the Contest! Crossed Reality June 23, 2002 10:12pm Yeah, so Day Four of the Contest of Champions will be online soon. Once I finish it. I just felt like popping on here to answer a question. While I won't tell who Terra's guest is going to be in the final match, I can assure you that no matter how much sense it would make to people who know me, it is not the woman pictured below. Thank you. Crossed Reality June 23, 2002 8:43am Almost exactly 12 hours later, Day Three of the Contest of Champions is online in the Features section! This one is slightly unpredictable...only slightly. Tune in tomorrow for the thrilling conclusion, and the naming of the champion? Oh, might as well put up another Lilo and Stitch image. Crossed Reality June 22, 2002 8:48pm I really should be working on Day Three of Contest of Champions, according to my brain. So, I'll probably start that around 9:30 or so, although no matter when I finish it, it won't be posted until midnight. Two days until I register for classes (which I really hope goes well), two days until Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem comes out (again, the go well hoping, although the boys at Gamespot and Penny Arcade have made me feel better about that one). So, I'll be back early tomorrow morning with the next day of Contest of Champions, and, until then, here's another Lilo and Stitch image. Crossed Reality June 22, 2002 7:53am A few things to mention. Kitty Vertigo has supplied a secondary commentary to Athena Falconess's feature from yesterday, which means we now have three features taking advantage of the second box. The second day of Contest of Champions is now online in the Features section, so you should go check it out, now. As for the rest...hell, just look at this. Crossed Reality June 21, 2002 10:13pm First some good news. Lilo and Stitch kicked ass. Disney has once again proven that while it may have its slumps, when it gets down to it, no one makes a better animated film. Not even those wacky "four frames a second is fine!" anime people. My point being that the backgrounds in Lilo are of an awesome visual style, and the film in general is just great. The first fifteen minutes are worth the price of admission alone, I promise you. I also dropped by on Minority Report, which was quite good as well. I think it might have been a little bit better, but all in all well worth your time. Especially if you're a Philip K. Dick fan. At any rate, there is some bad news. I've had three hours of sleep in the past 48, so, I've decided to take some nap time rather than finish day two of Contest of Champions. Consider it rained out...by flaming sulfur (sometimes called brimstone, for those of you not in the know). Good night, I'll see you tomorrow with all that I promised for today. Blame Disney and Spielburg. Crossed Reality June 21, 2002 8:03am Speaking of Athena Falconess...several hours later...I finally put her latest feature online. It's been sitting in my inbox roughly since dinosaurs roamed the Earth (which, the way I figure it, was Monday), but due to a few factors I've been pushing it back a day at a time. Well, now she's revised it slightly, and I've put it online. So, check it out on the Features page or forever be without joy. I'm going to be off later today to see Lilo and Stitch, a movie I am disturbingly looking forward to. I might get in minority report as well, but there's no way of telling on that one, it all depends on how bored or offended I am after Lilo. At any rate, I'll be back later tonight with my opinions on a movie, and Day Two of the Contest of Champions, which will feature Terra Branford, Hermione Granger, and Starscream, among others. Look forward to it! Zen, I'm counting on you to make sure BtB doesn't fall into another coma, it's too late to replace him with anything other than an inanimate carbon rod. Crossed Reality June 21, 2002 12:48am Today is a first for the Jux Entente: We have our first ever guest commentary! Athena Falconess was kind enough to help us out with that. Crossed Reality June 20, 2002 11:31pm Here she is, a shiny new feature, just for you! Let the contest begin! Crossed Reality June 20, 2002 9:19pm Sorry about the relative silence yesterday. My sleep schedule has been really messed up, mostly by the videogames to which I am addicted. We'll be getting commentary on the group feature shortly...I hope you enjoyed our experiment. Right now, I'm working on a new feature which I call the "Contest of Champions". Until then, enjoy this dpad colorform I did. It's right here. Crossed Reality June 19, 2002 10:54pm Our first attempt at a group feature is up. We failed. I have to eat before I die, so I'll be back later. Crossed Reality June 19, 2002 4:32am While you're waiting for us to post our new content later today, why don't you read something from CNN? Personally, I think they should just annex the whole thing outright and toss Arafat in prison, but I've expressed my views here before, and I don't like repeating myself. Now then, I've decided to get some Resident Evil 2 in before Eternal Darkness comes out...perhaps as a way to remind myself of just how far graphics technology has come, I don't know. I've also not played through that game since sometime in 1999, that could have something to do with it. I don't have the dual shock edition, just the original release (Win a part in the movie!!). Time to get reacquainted with my old friend the directional pad. Das oldschoolin`. Crossed Reality June 19, 2002 4:02am Well, today just disappeared. We'll have features for you later today, either right before I leave for work, or right after. Just thought I'd drop in and prove that we are not, in fact, dead. Although I have been seeing enough Zombies over the past week... Crossed Reality June 18, 2002 3:22am I told you we'd have features up before the night was out. There's a new one by myself, naturally, and one from ZenZagg now online in the Features section. Go check it out. Right now. I mean it. Crossed Reality June 17, 2002 11:02pm Well, just a few things of note. I've updated the Jux Entente Site Format Explained article in the Information section to be a bit more in depth and generally useful than before. Also, at Kitty Vertigo's request, another featuer has been added to the "Our Favourites" section...it shouldn't be too hard to figure out which one. Both Zen and I are working on new features at the moment, mine should be up later tonight, but still too late to count as one for the 17th. I actually have a new guest feature I should be formatting, but that will have to go up after I finish mine. Just not enough time, you know. Later on tomorrow I'm probably going to update the Jux Store with Zen's new Cabbage Power shirt, and I'm thinking about adding mouse pads. Not that we're moving too much merchandise as it is, mind, just more because I'm bored. We have sold two Gurk! mugs, which astounds me. I'll be back in just a few hours. Crossed Reality June 17, 2002 12:56am Here's that other addition I was talking about. The Features page now contains a new box right below the "Latest Features" section which includes what we think are some of our best. The ones in there now were picked by ZenZagg and myself. I decided to put that section there as a way to help people new to the site figure out what the hell is going on. Hopefully it will work. Crossed Reality June 16, 2002 10:32pm Quite a few updates to announce at the moment. We have a new guest feature online, so you should check that out. Seraphim Vampire has been added to the Members page in the Guest section with the rank of Baronet, to reflect his new status. I've also updated the photo gallery with the new shot of Kitty Vertigo from yesterday. Either tomorrow or later tonight I'll add the other thing I was talking about, plus a little addition to the store. Oh, and Zen say's he's working on a new feature, so you'll have that to look forward to as well. He's finally converted to the Netscape side of the war. Go Zen! Crossed Reality June 16, 2002 6:03am Well, my brain hurts now, but I finally created the news archive. I did my best to preserve the format that the news post was created in, which means that the earliest archived posts reflect our original design. Since they even go back to our Ragnarok Online days here, you'll see a few posts under our RO names as well, which is almost creepy. It's not perfect, of course. Since I saved all the posts in plain text to start with, any special formatting such a links has been destroyed. I restored the italics in the right places to the old design posts, but other than that, I simply don't have the patience to restore all the formatting. In the future, since I won't be doing the plain text deal, everything will be preserved in its original form. Now then, any images in the posts have also been removed, making things a little confusing at times, but this will continue. Since the archive is already big enough just in text, keeping the images intact would eventually lead to one ball buster of a page. I guess just use your imagination. The news archive will be updated every day from now on with the posts removed from the main page that day. If you want to access it, there will be a permanent link at the bottom of this page, and also one in the Information section. Speaking of the Information section, I've reworked it a bit to move the FAQ link up a bit, so it's more prominent. As for the other change I want to inact on the page, I'm going to have to talk to Zen and Kitty about the best way it should be done, or if it should even be done at all. I also have a new item to add to the store later today, but you'll hear about that when it happens. Ciao. Crossed Reality June 15, 2002 9:15pm Welcome to my new feature. I hope you'll enjoy your stay. Now, if you will excuse me, it's time to go avoid Lisa Trevor for awhile. Oh, one thing though, I'm probably not doing a feature for the next day or two; instead, I'm going to be working on a few aspects of the site, such as adding a news archive finally. Ta. Crossed Reality June 15, 2002 4:27pm We have a new Kitty Vertigo feature up for your reading pleasure. I'm about three fourths done with a feature that I was working on last night, that I was planning on uploading last night actually, but hunting for secrets in Resident Evil sidetracked me. I want that Samurai Edge damnit!! :) I'll see if I can light a fire under Zen's ass later. Crossed Reality June 14, 2002 12:48pm Okay, so my new feature is online now. It's been kid tested and mother approved! I'm taking a break from my two days of hardcore gaming to have a social life today, which means that while I've freed myself from the game-induced coma, you still don't get a normal-sized update today. Life is hard, and I know you're disappointed, but sometimes, these things just happen. End cliched quote. I'll be back later tonight or tomorrow :) Crossed Reality June 13, 2002 10:33pm I'm still trapped in gaming land, so this news post is all you're getting until tomorrow. So, uh, yeah. There's my update. I'm still trapped in gaming land. :) Not all is good in the gaming world today, though, since Zen's much-vaunted GeForce 4 finally arrived at his door...broken. Many Federal Express employees are probably in severe pain now. Crossed Reality June 13, 2002 3:14am Let's face it: you knew I wasn't going to have a feature up before midnight. You knew no one else was going to, either. I'm very sorry. To make up for it, I have a new feature up right this very minute! It's not what I was planning to write though. My original intention was to produce the second chapter of Bobby the Deity for you, but that just didn't work out all that well. I'll be back later today to say something in the period of time when our readers are actually awake, I promise. I might even tweak something on the site. Why? I don't know. I just feel like tweaking something. Hmm, maybe I'll bring the news archive into existance. Anything is possible...although not probable, with the GameCube staring at me. Crossed Reality June 12, 2002 3:57pm Did I say things would be back to normal tonight? I just got a new GameCube game, so you can hope, but I think prayer would be in order :) That's a *nudge nudge* hint to what I'm going to post if I can tear myself away from my Jet Black child tonight. We shall see what occurs. In other news, check out the new Spelling the Vacuum, where Elliott decided to use one of our chat logs as his news post. Crossed Reality June 11, 2002 11:11pm I am in a horrible, bitchy mood right now. A violent mood. I might just kill someone. But, hey, we've got a new guest feature up! Go read that, and I promise to be my lovable self again tomorrow, right after I get back from work. Purging yourself of someone you've been friends with for years is very, very hard. Crossed Reality June 11, 2002 2:27pm Yeah, here I am again. I just finished updating the members page to change all the listed email addresses, thought I'd pop on and say something here as well. My sunburn is gone. Yay! I'm extremely glad it's summer at the moment, which means I have extra money. Why is this? Because of all the new games that are coming out soon. During the school year I would be funneling money into gas, which would hurt my finances just enough to put a few out of my realistic reach (since I insist upon saving money). Eternal Darkness, Super Mario Sunshine, Lost Kingdoms...take me!! Oh, while I'm at it I might as well give you an update to our random Jux Entente statistics! Total page requests on new host: 877 Number of features online: 43 (!!) Number of Picasso features online: 5 Number of features without commentary: 1 Number of features permanently without commentary: 1 Number of features with dual commentary: 2 Number of features with the word "love" somewhere in the title: 4 Number of sites linking to the Jux Entente: 1 Crossed Reality June 11, 2002 1:32am Have you ever had the sensation of missing time? ZenZagg just added his commentary to my last two features, and when I first added it, I put in 'June 10'. Because I thought it still was June 10th. It turns out that I had been working out my classes for over two hours, but I finally have what I'm going to take for the fall semester worked out. Registration is next week, so I decided to figure it out ahead of time. It looks like in the Fall I'm going to be in Microeconomics, World Geography, World Literature, and, the corner stone, England to 1688. W00t! Crossed Reality June 10, 2002 4:14pm I decided to be nice and post today's feature before I left for work. Like, a few seconds before I left for work. At any rate, the massive Picasso battle sequence is now online. Tomorrow you'll probably get something new from me as well, and it will almost assuredly be written, since my Photoshop urge has been sated for a few days. Also, I'm sure a few of you have figured out by now that Kitty's piece isn't quite as lazy as it seems. Good for you :) Crossed Reality June 9, 2002 11:36pm And now, Kitty Vertigo's new feature is online. Feast upon it! Crossed Reality June 9, 2002 10:41pm Well then, some actual news. I spent a good part of the day at work in Photoshop, most of it for the new Picasso feature that will go up tomorrow, but since I was at it I created two new wallpapers that are up in the Downloads section. There might be a feature up for you tonight, but it won't be by me, since you all know that I am wallowing in a dank pit of emotional dispair, like the good little manic depressive I am :) Still, I will have a new Picasso feature for you tomorrow, and a new written feature will follow the day after unless this sunburn I have eats me alive in my sleep. It's happened before, I swear. Crossed Reality June 9, 2002 2:26pm Well, here I am again. Zen and I walked around a water park for eight hours yesterday after getting up early to do it, then preceeded to play board games with Samantha until much later in the evening, so I'm sorry for the brevity of last night's news post. Everything took much longer than we were anticipating, but it was a great day. The park was fun as always, even if the day was a bit more uneventful than normal. As for what we're updating at the moment, not much of anything. Kitty has added commentary to my Link Farm, and that's it. I'm hoping one of the other guys is going to do a feature tonight, because I'm taking the night off. After reading my last feature, you might understand why. I'll still probably pop on with news later, but no new feature. Crossed Reality June 8, 2002 11:33pm I have returned. I also hurt like hell. I'll do a much bigger post tomorrow, I promise, but at least my new feature is online. I don't think you'll like it though, since it's more of a dip into my madness than anything else. Crossed Reality June 8, 2002 11:23am Well, Zen and I are off to White Water, a massive water park, in about another 20 minutes. What does this mean to you? Not much of anything, I don't think. I wrote a new feature for you last night, and while it still needs a little work, it will almost certainly make it up tonight. The only thing that could possibly prevent that from happening is if I hang out with my friend Samantha much longer than anticipated. Which, you know, could happen, but with her mother I don't think it's likely. However, just so I don't have to do this all at once, I've gone ahead and updated the photo gallery in the Information section with the new pictures that will be used in this feature :) Crossed Reality June 7, 2002 3:49pm And now, my new feature is online. I'm spending most of the rest of the night away from home, I think, so if Zen or Kitty decide to write something it's going to be late tonight before it is online. See you tomorrow! Crossed Reality June 7, 2002 2:31pm According to our reports, Googlebot has now spidered his way through all of our html files. Booyah! ZenZagg June 7, 2002 1:49am I'm commenting up a storm tonight. Added commentary to four of Graemes comment-less features: Bobby The Deity: Chapter One, Tales From Seventh Grade, Are You There God? Graeme Still Can't Draw, and (Graeme's Down). I'm back on full time schedule at work so I will have even less time to do leisurely things, but at least I will have a heavier wallet in the process. In other news, I've suddenly found myself having strange creative moments. In the past three days I've managed to teach myself how to build sculptures and other objects (including an intimidating M&M spider) out of those sticks of staples you insert into staplers, learned I have quite a knack for making posable wire-men out of my copper eletrical wires, and for some reason decided to learn how to play the harmonica. *shrug* I feel like photoshopping when I get some time, so perhaps I will have another feature soon. Crossed Reality June 6, 2002 10:30pm Just like I almost promised, my new feature is online. I think it is the single most offensive thing I have ever written. Hell, I'm offended by it. Which is why I find it funny. Enjoy :) Crossed Reality June 6, 2002 2:25pm Quite a few things to say today. My massive San Francisco post has finally been archived, which means I've been back more than a week. That's slightly upsetting. A few of you may have noticed that I very quietly updated the Members page last night to give at least a little credit to our guest authors. They may not be members of Jux, but at least they're listed now, albeit in much more brief form than we are. Click on over to the Information section and you'll see that the FAQ has been updated with a few new questions, and the removal of some that no longer apply. If I hadn't had to add the Jux Store link to all the pages, I don't know when I would have noticed that was so out of date. Finally, Kitty Vertigo's new Feature is up, and just two clicks away! Oh, and I'm working again tonight, but if you're all very good and sacrifice your livestock, I might be able to scrape out a new feature myself. Crossed Reality June 5, 2002 9:51pm It's done, and before 10:00 even. I'm actually proud of myself. While I was updating all the pages I noticed that the FAQ is horribly out of date, since we've launched a few things only hinted at in there since its writing. I'll remedy that shortly. Tomorrow, you're going to get a new feature by Kitty Vertigo (I have it sitting right here), and hopefully one from me, if I sit down and write it. So busy this week, so very busy. Crossed Reality June 5, 2002 4:18pm Yet another night of work for me begins soon. But, before that happens, I just thought you'd like to know that Kitty's new feature is now up. He's been having lots of computer problems, so it was stuck on his hard drive for almost a week after it's completion. As you can also see, the rolling update has not yet been completed. This is because I'm working over three times as many hours this week as I normally do. It will be up tonight, I promise, but it's going to be sometime around or after 10:00pm. In addition, I've been a certain state of mental duress ever since returning from San Francisco that I'm going to have deal with this week. I hope you can understand why this is taking a little (just a little!) longer than it should. In other, happier news, I completed a fan comic for Elliott of Spelling the Vacuum last night. This is sort of a thank you to him for actually linking to us, and just for being so cool in general. DESPITE the fact that he forced me to draw Spelling by hand. I got my revenge for that when he said it was the best drawing of Spelling he'd ever seen not done by him. That makes me feel good about my meager art skills. Crossed Reality June 4, 2002 10:46pm Well, here it is. The store is here! This is how we hope to be able to at least recover some of our money from running this site, without stooping to advertising, which we're all against. I'm starting the rolling update now, to add the link to all the pages. Until I'm done, it will be only accessible from the link on the main page. Sorry, but since we're not dynamically generated, it takes a little while. All new features will have the link, natch, since I updated our template with it. At the very latest I'll have everything fixed up tomorrow, I promise. The combination of this and the Library thing is going to prevent you from having a feature tonight though. You can forgive us, right? Hell, I'm sure you've not read the whole archive of the things. So, uh, anyway...buy something. Crossed Reality June 4, 2002 10:04pm Boy am I behind. I just got back from the library, over an hour late. I had to stay because we were struck by lightning, which blew the hell out of one of our light fixtures. Ozone and various other uh-oh electrical smells filled the building, so we called the fire department. After a complete investigation, we were delcared okay, so off we went. Should still upload the new section today, but if I don't manage it, well, blame the fire department :) Crossed Reality June 4, 2002 1:11pm I have to get to work in a few hours, and I doubt you'll get a feature update before then. In fact, I'm not sure if I'm going to have a feature for tonight, beause I'm busy creating a new section's html that will launch today. Which means I have to do another rolling update since not a single page of this site is dynamically generated. It's going to be great! See you sometime after 9:00. Crossed Reality June 4, 2002 1:36am As of just a few moments ago, our former home on Adelphia freespace was taken offline. Some of you may be seeing this page after being redirected from there for some time. It served us well for the month of May, during which time we forged this page into the form it now holds. I would like to hold a moment of silence for our embryonic home. ZenZagg June 3, 2002 8:28pm Ah, it's good to be back home. Daytona Beach (Daytona Beach Shores; different city a few miles down the beach, same friggin difference :P) kicked all ass. I got a nice tan from both that trip and the trip I took today to the water park (White Water). I sent Graeme the wrong format of my feature in my haste to leave this morning--the updated version can be viewed here, and it should be MUCH easier to read than what was up before. Graeme has a new Picasso feature out, so you should check that out as well. We actually have a domain now...kinda scary isn't it? :P Crossed Reality June 3, 2002 3:00pm You all thought I was lying, didn't you? Well, I proved you wrong! We're here! Crossed Reality June 3, 2002 2:13pm There is so much to say that I'm certain this is going to be another extremely long news post. Well, despite the fact that nothing else was said on the main page, anyone who dropped by here last night knows that I did indeed put the new Features page format up. I know that was our only update for yesterday, but, hey, it took a lot of work and design to get to that new look. Today we have quite a few things updating, although only one new feature. The Information section has two pages updating. The Site Creation FAQ has been slightly updated to give credit to Zen for co-developing the new Feature format. The photo section has been updated because I had some new, high-res [although MUCH reduced from their original size] pictures of myself and Zen to put up. So, now he has more than one photo up. I also posted two pictures of the coolest animal in the world, Whitie, my giant feline companion who's part wild cat. I'll put one of the pictures here. For size comparison reasons, that book is a standard sized hardcover, and that's a rather large suburban window. Anyway, the new feature deserves special mention. Zen did indeed do a multi-page feature, and it's not what you would expect. A few days ago I did a feature called (Graeme's Down) where I explored my continuing problem in a completely vague one paragraph feature. Well, in our continuing effort to make this place look like a psycho ward, Zen wrote this feature to explain the problems that have hounded him for years. Except, his is extremely detailed, and much longer, and really deserves to speak for itself, as my commentary states. I am going to tell one story here though. It's about AIM, the accelerated learning program of Georgia. In Zen's story, getting put into it wasn't exactly a great thing for him at first, until he got to middle school and met Kenny (and myself shortly after, although I had other friends for the first two or three months). The exact opposite was true for me in my life, which struck me when I read his feature. First of all, I barely have any conscious memory of being put into AIM. Zen mentions being tested by the ITBS, but he neglects to mention the AIM aptitude test, probably because he forgot. If you scored high enough on any standardized test to get the attention of the AIM board, they would give you this test. It was the same for every grade level, so fourth graders took the same test as six graders etc. Most of the AIM kids got in about 5th grade or so. Well, I didn't. I was placed in the accelerated class after I took the AIM test at the end of Kindergarten. This made me quite different, because all of the other AIM kids at my school were 4th, 5th, or 6th grade. It pissed them off at first, because at this time AIM was a class you took once a day, and it replaced your lit. When I was in 5th grade it would be switched to the one whole day a week system. Well, because I was the only one of my age group in the program, the school decided it would be best to keep me separate from the other children. What this meant was that they took away one of their 5 days a week, and gave it to me, except I did have a full day, instead of one period, since I had to stay in my normal classes the rest of the week. They weren't too happy with being forced to hang out in the normal classes when they used to be free of them. Still, I never got treated like Zen says he was. I was looked at as a freak, and not much else. Since I enjoy being viewed as a freak, it worked out pretty well. In case you're curious, I was merged back into the normal AIM classes in 4th grade, when about a half dozen other members of my grade took the test and passed. I don't think I will ever understand why Zen was treated like he was when he came to this state. My experiences with Canton Elementary were all very positive towards new kids, we loved them, they were a break from the monotony. Anyway, I've rambled on far too long. Go check out his new feature. Now. Crossed Reality June 2, 2002 7:57pm I've got some good news and some bad. Travis informed me last night that he had completed a 5 to 6 page feature, which is wonderful, except he didn't email it to me or upload it himself or anything, so hopefully I'll get in touch with him again later. As far as I know, Kenny hasn't fixed his file system yet. He managed to make his Linux partition very unhappy. However, he's got a new feature written as well, if he can rescue it from his Linux partition. I've not been entirely idle. I'll upload the new, slightly tweaked features navigation page tonight. As of last night, I had done two possible designs, but neither was going to work properly. One had it sorted by author, which wasn't fair to Zen. Since he'll always be last in the alphabetical order listings, as we posted more features he would slip further and further down the page. My other design was a simplistic monthly segmentation system. Zen looked at both of these and suggested, in his ultimate wisdom, that I combine them in some way. So, I did. I think it turned out pretty well, actually. Thanks Zen! An interesting thing about the alphabetical order thing that I've pointed out to Kenny and Travis, but not to you, our audience before. In doing the members page, and just about anywhere else on the site where all of us are listed in a row, it's done in alphabetical order by alias. Crossed Reality, Kitty Vertigo, and ZenZagg. What I thought was funny was that this order would be the exact same if it was done by our first names (Graeme, Kenny, Travis) or our last names (Hefner, Knapke, Rosenbaum). It's almost like Zen was fated to be at the bottom, which isn't fair at all, thus why the author arrangement system will never happen. Oh, and the juxentente.myrmid.com sub domain isn't working anymore, or ever again. Like I said, that was just a temporarily place holder. Crossed Reality June 1, 2002 11:24pm The new Information section feature is up, this time it's a photo gallery of all of your Jux pals. It's going to be updated semi-regularly, as more photos of us come online. I also fixed an irritating Internet Explorer (stupid browser) wrap error in Athena's feature while I was at it. To quote Kenny: * Kitty Vertigo cries Kitty Vertigo: i broke linux So, you have that to thank for no race feature tonight :) Tomorrow I'll either write a new funny feature for you, or do a serious piece about that time I got in a fist fight with Roger Bacon. We'll see what happens. Crossed Reality June 1, 2002 6:16pm We have a new guest feature up. That is all. Crossed Reality June 1, 2002 5:24pm Ow. Nine hours of work. On a Saturday. I'm tired, but that doesn't mean you'll be missing out on anything! Kitty's race feature will be up later (he did pretty well), I'm foregoing a fun feature to put up something new in the Information section, and other than that...hell, I don't know, it depends on how conscious we all are in a few hours. Kitty Vertigo May 31, 2002 11:18pm Meow. Hi people. My first news post! I'm so shy! *hides* No kitties here! Oh. Are you still here? Ok. Well I just wanted to say that I have a cool race tomorrow. Kitty has to run 5000m. That is like 3.1 miles. I hope I win! I will have a cool feature on the race and stuff tomorrow or maybe monday. Meow! *pounces after a frog* Crossed Reality May 31, 2002 6:58pm One taste of you my magdalena...oh, sorry, am I on? I actually don't have much to say, but I felt like saying SOMETHING. I've been in the format mines for the past half hour, trying to see if I could tweak the current format to have rounded corners on the cells. So far, everything has looked like shit, so I dropped that idea. I'm also coming up with a few drafts of what a segmented features page might look like, because at some point I know that the long listing method we're doing now will become ungainly. It's not a pressing matter, rather, just something for me to do while I'm bored and trying to resist weird urges that tell me to drive my car to the home of everyone I know. Which I can't do, because I have to work for nine hours tomorrow. Wee. Anyway, I also feeling like mentioning the newest Penny Arcade. While Gabe may only enter this stage of gaming once in a butterfly eclipse thingie, I spend my entire life in that particular mode. In fact, I'm pretty sure that exact expression was on my face when I first touched Chrono Cross, although I can't be sure. That whole week is pretty hazy. I remember my girlfriend getting angry, and something about eating. Crossed Reality May 31, 2002 12:31pm Hey hey! Actually, I'm nowhere near that happy, but it's nice of you to care. Zen is back from vacation, so we're running a full crew again. Just a few more things to work out with the host change, until we're done the myrmid account is just going to mirror the adelphia one. Once the domain is fully up, the page will be taken off of the adelphia account and a simple redirect page will be set up in it's place. Yes, it will be a slightly sad day when the Jux Entente moves from its embryonic home out into the big, scary world "outside" (aren't there bears outside?). Try not to get too torn up over it. In the mean time, I've got a new feature posted on the site to end the drought, but I don't think anyone is going to be too happy with it. Once Zen recovers from the long vacationary drive, and when Kitty is done with his race, I'm sure we'll get more up as well. Plus those nagging commentaries that have been lagging behind. So much to do, so little time. Crossed Reality May 30, 2002 1:19pm News is archived. Domain isn't up, but we're on the new host! What, you're not there? Try http://juxentente.myrmid.com. Crossed Reality May 29, 2002 10:26pm, (7:26pm PST) When I left, I told myself I wouldn't be doing one of those long, rambling posts when I got back about everything I did while on vacation. Then I started thinking about the number of times I was going to have to repeat the story if I didn't. Since most of my friends read this page, I figure doing it here will save a lot of time. So get ready for the longest post ever folks, as I give a complete account of my time on the west coast. I got up about 4:50 to start my journey to Hartsfield for my 8:00 flight to SFO. With all the new security it's always good to establish a little bit of a time buffer, especially when you're leaving from the busiest airport in the world, several times over. It turned out to be a good thing, since security wasn't happy with me. First they dropped my ID, slowing down the whole line, and then they deciding that my bag needed searching. It could have been worse though, my sister Erin was wanded for about 3 minutes straight, until they finally determined that it was her belt setting off the alarm. The thought of my sister, the super yuppie, being any sort of security hazard is just funny, but it would have been a hell of a lot funnier if I hadn't been having my bag searched at the same time, causing the general populace to look at my parents as if they had raised the world's two most evil children. Of course, in their defense, I look like a terrorist, and all the SODWIC's in the world aren't going to change that. Of the flight itself, there is little to say, other than it was perhaps the smoothest of the many I have taken in my life. That pilot knew what he was doing. Once we got to San Francisco we shuffled ourselves to the rental car office to pick up our sparkling new Buick (I like Buicks, so shut the hell up), and begin our trip to the hotel. Let me say something here: every single radio station in San Francisco sucks. The DJs were horrible, boring, and obnoxious, and instead of the same 5 or 6 songs we've come to expect here on the east coast, they stick with about 3. And they're really bad. And they had every single kind of station possible except for a rock one. So I had to listen to pop bullshit on some station named Alice for a week. Whee. My fun began once we got to the hotel, when I turns out that it was ON STRIKE! We were in a really nice hotel, it was on the Embarcadero right alongside Fisherman's Wharf, and the management were running the whole place. All the services were still running, with management fufilling normal duties. Basically, completely normal except for the angry picketers outside. Of course, this is wonderful fun to me, since the first time they got angry at me for crossing their picket line, I got to tease them. I even took out a camera and took pictures, which they didn't like too much either. Even more good came out of this, since to appease us the hotel bumped us up from a normal room to a full suite for no extra charge. Go! Once we were checked in we set out immediately for Alcatraz, where I toured the island, the prison, and just about everything else. We then headed back to the wharf, played with the Sea Lions that have taken over Pier 39, grabbed a quick dinner, and went back to the room so my family could sleep off the jet lag. I proceeded to play Breath of Fire for a few hours in my room, before sleeping myself. The next day held what I really wanted to do anyway. We woke up at about 6:00am their time, grabbed breakfast, and hit the road to San Jose in the Buick, with the horrible radio stations as a companion, to go see the Winchester Mystery House. I'd seen God knows how many specials on that place, I've always wanted to see it, and damnit, I can now say I've toured it. It kicks so much ass. If you don't know much about it, google it and come back, it's worth your time. I'm left with the distinct desire to build my own insane mansion now. Once we'd spent a few hours there, we went back through San Francisco and across the Bay Bridge into Oakland, and Berkeley, just to say we'd been there. When we got back we realized we didn't really have time to do anything else before grabbing dinner, so we just went and did a round trip on the world's only moving historical monuments, the Cable Cars. After that we grabbed dinner at a place on the wharf with a name that sounds vaguely like a horrible disease, Scoma's, and then back to the hotel to catch a movie before turning in for the night. The next day would be another Graeme day, since immediately after we woke up we were off for Muir Woods. If you don't know, Muir Woods is the world's most famous Redwood forest. It contains the single tallest measured tree in the wood, and the whole place is just amazing. If you've seen the movie Vertigo, it's one of the places where she runs in her insanity, you know, with the giant wood cut out of world history. We walked for miles in that place, and they finally had to convince me to go back. I wanted to see it all and cover every trail, but we ended up just doing a loop across a few of the main ones. We had other things to do that day anyway, but one day I'm going to go back and walk every possible inch of that forest that they'll let me. Once back in town, we had more walking to do. We had already driven across the Golden Gate Bridge to get to Muir woods, but this time, we decided to walk it. You see, it just happened to be exactly 65 years since the bridge's completion on May 27, 1937. So I walked the length of the Golden Gate Bridge on it's 65th birthday. Then we got dinner and went to the Aquarium of the Bay, and I got to pet a real live leopard shark! Plus we saw some fish, but I got to play with sharks, so that's all that matters. Then it was back to the hotel to prepare for another day. The next day began with us driving south on coast road 1 so my mother could see the cliffs and the Pacific ocean, which she decided to wade into so she could say she'd touched both oceans. Then we reversed our direction and went north on 1, back across the Golden Gate, and to Muir beach, perhaps the most impressive sea scape I've seen yet. Then we went back and caught the cable car into downtown San Francisco. My sister made her pilgrimage to the world's first Gap and Old Navy, and I was unleashed upon the Sony Metreon. I don't think it'll be the same for awhile. It was my sister's birthday, so I treated her to dinner at the world's most Godawful restraunt chain, the Rainforest Cafe, but she wanted it so I had no choice. Then we were done for the night again. The next day, today, actually, saw our return home. Erin got wanded again, my bag wasn't searched outright but spent an abnormally long time being x-rayed, and I'm home. I had an awesome time out there, but damnit, I was glad to be back on the East Coast. California just isn't for me. Of course, I can't get my cat out of his hell until 7:30 tomorrow morning; I'll probably be waiting at the door when they open. In site news, I won't be archiving the news, despite this massive post, until tomorrow, because I'm really freaking tired and I need to catch up on a few things. Look forward to Jux's true return tomorrow. Crossed Reality May 24, 2002 6:56pm More hiatus day festivities. I just put up the new Kitty Vertigo feature, with any luck, Zen will toss one on here before the night is done. I wouldn't hold your breath though, he's not real good with fufilling obligations. In non-site news, I just got back from putting my cat in boarding for the trip. He looked so sad, and he was mewing so pathetically when I left...*sigh*. Sure, I know it's better this way than flying him across the country in a kitty carrier and keeping him in a hotel room for days, but that doesn't mean I have to be happy about it. I just hope the people there understand that he is capable of killing them should they do anything wrong. Crossed Reality May 24, 2002 1:12pm I'm trying to get everything that needs doing before the move "wrapped up" before I leave. That involves getting commentary put on three features, and...actually, that's about it, unless I decide to sort the features page by author. I'm packing at the moment, but I just thought I'd toss my new feature online while I'm doing it, for your reading pleasure. Or pain, if you're French. Sorry France, but it's just funny. I'll be sure to update at least one more time before I leave, so this isn't the last you've heard of me! Crossed Reality May 24, 2002 2:30am Well, things are getting ready for the brief shutdown that will accompany both Zen and I leaving for vacation. At 6:00am Saturday I board a jet bound for San Francisco, which resides within the depths of my second least favourite state, and will remain there until late Wednesday. During that time the page will not be updated, which means I'm going to try to get a new feature from all of us up to tide you over. Zen's vacation starts Monday and lasts until Thursday, but  the page will be updated as soon as I get back, so don't worry about that. As soon as I get back we will be migrating to our new home, and juxentente.com, which means you'll have some excitement to fill your days the second I return. I can't think of much else to say here. Features will up later today, E3 continues to amaze, and Netscape 7 should be the only browser I see accessing this site. That is all. Crossed Reality May 23, 2002 12:40pm Well, I'm not sure what there is to say at the moment. I have a new feature up, another collection of three Picasso comics. Check the features page for the link love on that one. E3 continues, which is great. Netscape 7's preview release came out yesterday. Those of you in 6.2.3 can stick with it for now if you're afraid of beta software, but it has quite a few useful new features that you'll enjoy once its full version is out. Those of you still in IE need to be put to sleep :P Crossed Reality May 22, 2002 1:55pm I wasn't planning on releasing my new feature until later, once Zen and Kitty had read it, but I'm bored, so it's here. No commentary on it yet, and I'm not sure if it's funny or not. I'm not sure if I meant for it to be funny or not, actually. Just read and hopefully enjoy the tales of what the Entente used to be like in 7th grade, all the way back in the young part of the 1990's. Damn. Suddenly I feel old. Oh well, I shall hopefully return after my library duties are done with more content. Crossed Reality May 22, 2002 3:53am Just in case any of you were wondering, my verdict on the Smallville episode (which turns out to be a two-parter...damnit) was much better than expected. Probably because Clark seems to be the only character on anything I watch lately capable of using his brain. I have to work much later today, about 13 hours from now. I'm honestly not sure if my new feature is going to be up before or after I go to the library, or even what it's going to be. Both a new written piece and Picasso are vying for control of my attention. It all depends on how tired I am, really. To move on to something not site related, all of the news streaming from Nintendo's section of E3 is suprisingly good. I watched their press conference live earlier, and the new Legend of Zelda for GameCube looks astounding, I don't give a damn what those people who don't like the visual style say. There's also a new Zelda coming for the GBA, which is awesome. The footage of Star Fox Adventures and Super Mario Sunshine keeps getting better. Sony's announcements weren't half bad either, but so far massive apathy is all I have for the Xbox news. The biggest thing they have is Metal Gear Substance, which, let's face it, we've all been playing for months. Crossed Reality May 21, 2002 8:58pm What the hell is it with TV screwing me over lately? First Neleh gets screwed over in Survivor, and then the massive stupid upheaval that was the Gilmore Girls finale...if something incredibly ignorant and senseless happens during the Smallville finale, I'm going to go back to doing what I did for 1997-2001, and watch only the Simpsons and whatever comes on in their immediate area. Crossed Reality May 21, 2002 6:34am Kitty Vertigo's new piece is up. A few of you probably noticed that yesterday we had a tracker up. That was only a temporary thing while I tried to see how much, if any, unknown traffic we were getting. The answer is not all that much :) Still, to those two people out there in Windows NT, we love you! Anyway, check out Kitty's piece on the features page. I'll try not to go into how worried I am about tonight's season finale of Gilmore Girls, because I've already been disappointed by TV one time this week (Vecepia should NOT have won Survivor. Go Neleh!). If Rory chooses Jess... Crossed Reality May 20, 2002 10:43pm Here it is, 12 hours later. The piece that will bring Kitty Vertigo out of his hiatus won't arrive until tomorrow, so I decided to hook you up with my elusive new feature tonight. Check out the Features page for an expose on things I don't know...and you probably don't either. Crossed Reality May 20, 2002 10:50am Did you know that there is, at this moment, a new feature by me housed on this very server? Well, there is, but I'm not linking to it yet. It will be up either later today or tomorrow, as soon as I decide if it's good enough or rather or not Kenny is going to contribute anything today. If he's not, then up it goes. For once, there is no other news! I work tonight, but that never effects you at all except on those damned Saturdays I get drafted, so we'll ignore it for now. Oh, and I remembered while reading the backlog that I said "You'll probably be getting a lot of pictures until the novelty wears off, which will probably be a few more hours." And then I forgot to take them. Well, I'm not one to let my assumptions go unfounded, so just to prove myself right , I took two more pics at varying times just to add to this post. And now I'm done. So there. I was RIGHT! Hah! You can see one of my blonde streaks on the left... ...And the entirety of what Kenny calls "that thing on my head" here. ZenZagg May 20, 2002 3:31am We all kinda ceased to exist for a while, for various reasons. But, never fear, for we have returned! Kinda. Kenny has been sick, but I'm sure he will be back up to speed in no time. I just finished a new feature, "I Still Play With Toys". It's about my addiction to gadgetry, and the reason A.L.F. has a hit out on me. In other news, I shaved my goatee; I'm not sure, I may or may not keep this look. Also, my girlfriend, Sara, gave me a sample of a cologne called "Very Sexy for him". I never thought I'd be wearing anything other than Old Spice, but it smells fairly nice--the name doesn't hurt, either :P Crossed Reality May 19, 2002 1:45pm It's here! And by "It's" I mean, an update that includes a new feature and a new article for the information section, and by "Here" I mean an overloaded free server somewhere in GA. Just thought I'd clarify. We'll have more content online later, I assure you. Stuff that isn't written by me. As if in direct defiance of my earlier statement on world politics, there has been another bombing in Israel. Now, I want you to ignore the signature image that accompanies this post while I say my opinion on this matter. I don't think the Palesitinians should be given anymore consideration than any other terrorist group in the world. Most of them are just normal people, but they allow these dangerous militants to grow, and so they are directly responsible as well. This is not the way to gain world attention or independence. Besides, their entire basis for hating the Israelis is flawed. The main areas of Palestinian occupation, and what they want Israel out of, are the West Bank and the Gaza Strip. These were annexed by Israel after the six day war. Why is this important? Because they didn't start the six day war. They were going to attack Israel, instead, they got their asses handed to them. Well, not the Palestinians themselves, but the nation they were a part of [and not bombing innocent civilians within] at the time. If Israel wants to keep a bit of territory after it wins a war, that's fine. I have a lot more thoughts and angles on the issue, none of which involve religion, that would take something of feature length to explain. What it boils down to is that I'm not against Palestine becoming a nation of some kind, as long as they start acting like human beings about it, and recognize the fact that Israel isn't going anywhere in the process. On a lighter note, I got bored while waiting for something to download and did some quick Jux Entente statistics for you. Total Page Size: 3.37MB HTML: 33 files, 240KB (7.2%) Images: 44 files, 1.44MB (42.7%) Downloads: 2 files, 1.69MB (50.1%) Crossed Reality May 19, 2002 8:19am So, did you hear about India and Pakistan exchanging fire over the last few days? Now the envoys have been asked to leave. It just lends more weight to my argument that the world would be better off if western Europe and America just re-conquered it and told it to shut the hell up. That used to be a joke, but I'm not even sure anymore. You can read more about it  here if you're really interested. I do have some good news for you. I've finished off a feature to have online later tonight, so at the very least you'll be getting one new bit of mind candy, and hopefully more. Also, one of our few regular readers suggested in an IM that I add a "Credits" page to the site. I always figured that's what the members section was meant to do, but I have decided to update the Information section with a simple site-creation FAQ that explains the graphics editors we use and how we create everything else. Hopefully that will satisfy the one person who wants to read it :) Oh, I'm also on the lookout for better software than that which came with my webcam, ever since I noticed that netmeeting takes much better stills than the bundled software does, even in horribly low lighting (which makes Logitech's Quickcam software vomit in rage). Of course, they're also smaller. If you want to check out the difference, just look at the image below, and then in my news from yesterday. You'll probably be getting a lot of pictures until the novelty wears off, which will probably be a few more hours.   Ah, the cancerous glow of a monitor. Crossed Reality May 18, 2002 11:50pm Well, this is it for the night. We have a new feature for you...sort of. I realize a single, three-panel Picasso comic is insulting to your intelligence, but that's all we could come up with today, as the feature itself explains. In other news, I've removed the massive images that were in my news post from 4:00am, because I felt they'd been up long enough, and because they were the size of some peoples screen resolution. They will never appear here again, since they were just examples of the trouble I was going through to set up a webcam. The smaller images in my 10:30 newspost will stay up, and probably be archived, because I'm a sugary-sweet person. Now, I promise that tomorrow [which is in about 10 minutes], we will have much more content for you, since at least my late days are over for a little while. Crossed Reality May 18, 2002 10:35am New features will be up later, I promise. Probably as soon as Kitty wakes up...or Zen and I, considering we've not been to sleep yet. We're still embroiled in Super Smash Bros., although I did spend some time fixing up the web cam. Things are now much clearer, it just takes some patience. You can see the fruits of my labor below. These image posts will be moved to another location later, so as to prevent them from clogging up the main page. CR...looking very young, for some reason Zen being Zen Crossed Reality May 18, 2002 4:06am Yo. You're real update, the one with like, content and stuff, will come later today. Zen and I have been playing Super Smash Bros. Melee for a few hours, after I took him to experience the magic that is  Yoda kicking ass. I also spent some of my hard-earned (*cough*) money, and not a whole lot of it really, for a cheapass webcam today. This has shown me better than anything else the magic of that wonderful program known as Photoshop. Check it out. [Image removed after 24 hours] Direct shot of CR taken from cam Now, first let me point out that this thing takes pretty damn good video, even if it's stills aren't hot. And that would be a pretty good picture in and of itself if it wasn't for the interlace noise. But, I fired up ole photoshop to take some of these images to school, and, well, see for yourself. [Image removed after 24 hours] Softer, no? Sure, the process I used to get to the above lowered the sharpness of my facial features a bit, but it just looks so much cleaner. Anyway, there will be some high-res digital pics of Zen and I up soon, until then, enjoy your brief taste of the real cute one. Crossed Reality May 17, 2002 1:54pm Well, I have some more good news for you. Our format explanation is finally back up in the Information section. I knew you were all just chomping at the bit for it. It fully explains our new feature format, for any of you who were confused. It's also starting to look like I will be seeing Attack of the Clones again this evening, so, I don't want to even think about what that might do for our update. Hopefully nothing. But I said that yesterday, too. Crossed Reality May 17, 2002 9:39am I'm sorry for the late update, but, well, you're really lucky you're getting one at all. I know I just flat out fell unconscious last night after I returned from Attack of the Clones, a movie you should see several dozen times, and according to Kitty he had the same "I'm too asleep to do anything" problem I had. I didn't even talk to Zen after 7:00am yesterday, that's how messed up it was. Yet, you've got another feature by me to read, and hopefully later today I can prod Zen and Kitty into getting something up here. Until then, my new one is on the features page. Crossed Reality May 16, 2002 2:20pm Yes!!! I finally got my modem configured in Mandrake. What you are reading is the first thing I have ever posted online from Linux. I hope you enjoy the experience. Oh, and the update should be on time tonight, despite the fact that I'm going off to see attack of the clones ASAP. Crossed Reality May 16, 2002 1:33am Oh boy did today suck. First I had to work, and then Zen didn't finish his next feature again, which means that all we have to update with today is a few of my crapping drawings. I'm dreadfully sorry, if I had known I would be your only entertainment for the night, I would have done more. There are a few things beyond that to report. First of all, Elliott of Spelling the Vacuum finally linked to us! Yay! Hopefully some of you reading this will be new traffic from his site. I could set up a javascript to check referrals, but I'm too lazy to do that, so I'm just going to smile and assume that we've got new readers because of the link. That way I'll be happier when I sleep tonight. In other news, I have a pounding migraine which is making everything I type swim. Everyone seems to be able to DNS http://www.juxentente.com now, but things aren't quite set up with our new host yet, so the link is just showing register.com's lovely advertisement. I'm still hoping to get us all moved and happy in our home by next Thursday, otherwise this site isn't going to be updated for five or six days while I hang out in San Francisco. Lord knows that would kill you, right? I honestly can't believe that we've managed to update daily now for as long as we have. This is day 12 of our streak. Considering my past record was probably somewhere around 2 days in a row, with a five month break until the next update, that's pretty damned good. I can't wait to see what happens when we get Zen healthy again (like that ever happens) and Kitty back in GA, that will either greatly increase the amount of content you recieve...or make it cease to exist as we spend all of our time hanging out in the real world. I don't think that'll happen though, since I'm utterly banal where my money is involved, and since we've actually tossed money at this site now, I'm in it for the long haul. In fact, as I'm preparing for the update, I just realized we have 22 features online. That's more content than any of my previous webpages have had, even those that got enough hits to make this site look like the backwater it is. Oh well, I've rambled enough, but I have one more request. If any of you out there are reading this and did find this place thanks to Spelling, I would love it if you'd drop me a line at silversword@pairc.com so that I could get some idea of just how many people are reading us now that don't know us in real life. Crossed Reality May 15, 2002 2:00am And now, our third feature for the night is up, in the form of a few Kitty Vertigo. Crossed Reality May 15, 2002 1:01am We've got two new features up. To start off, there's a juicy bit written by moi in which I bash every established sport on the planet, and then set up my own national past time. When you're done with that, Athena Falconess has contributed another article to the Entente, this one about her nicotine withdrawal symptoms as she quits smoking. It's just a little bit disgusting, but worth reading. Crossed Reality May 14, 2002 9:05pm First of all, if Rory picks Jess I might just have to stop watching Gilmore girls. Secondly, I'd like to let you all know that as of yesterday www.juxentente.com is registered to us. We've also begun the process of the host move, which means the days of this place being trapped on adelphia's free webspace is rapidly coming to an end. I doubt any of you will be all that upset to see us moving. One day soon, /~gkhefner/ is just going to redirect you, and that's when you'll know we're open. Crossed Reality May 14, 2002 5:03am For all of you Kitty Vertigo fans out there, we now have an official Kitty wallpaper up in the downloads section. Enjoy. Crossed Reality May 14, 2002 1:10am Well, if you check the features page you'll see my new feature is up. ZenZagg has gone back and contributed commentary to my Super Smash Bros. feature from yesterday as well. Crossed Reality May 13, 2002 10:27pm I know I said that the format article would be back up by now, but I lied. Kitty is currently working on our feature templates to see what he can do with it to make it more efficient, and until I see what he comes up with, and whether or not it will change the page appearance, I'm not going to rewrite the article. That being said, the features will be up later, although it looks like you're only going to have one from me tonight. Oh, and did anyone else notice that everything was posted as the 13th yesterday? Embarrassing. Crossed Reality May 12, 2002 11:46pm Okay, two new features are online. You can check out the newest Kitty Vertigo here, and my newest bit here. I hope they are to your liking. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to bed now. Crossed Reality May 12, 2002 9:50pm WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! It's done. The site has been reformatted. There are probably still some issues with pages, but I'll handle those on a case-by-case basis. In other news, the features will be going up later tonight, near their normal time. In the Information sections, I've temporarily taken the Format article offline, because it is useless now. I should have it updated tonight, tomorrow at the latest. New features come first, though, so who knows. New features will be posted more than once per day now, if they're availible, so no more waiting for massive updates...that's good right? ZenZagg May 12, 2002 9:11pm A Change Will Do You Good. We're constantly changing things around here, so heres the scoop:    1. The Main page format has changed. We've added signature images to the information headers above news entries so you can readily tell who posted what--plus it gives us a chance to flaunt our sigs :P.    2. The Features page has also undergone a similar facelift. There are now two comment fields to allow for better cross-commenting between us. Also, the same kind of header as seen on news items is now in comment fields so you know who's commenting and when. We believe these changes are progress toward a better archetecture on TJE, and we hope you do too. Stay tuned for further updates. (NOTE: A full explanation of the format of this site can be found in the information section.) Crossed Reality May 12, 2002 8:30pm I would just like to say that the Simpsons fucking rocked tonight. I'm still hoping Zen will pop in for me, since I've yet to finish converting the html files. 10 of our 23 pages have been converted, including this one, and are now posted online. Crossed Reality May 12, 2002 6:22pm I just got off work. I hurt. I'm tired. I cry. And, as you can see by now, I've just begun work on a massive rolling update. The new features for the night will be posted later, around the time that the rest of the pages suddenly become adapted to the new, final format change. Hopefully Zen will pop on and explain just what's changed, since I really don't want to go explain it all right now. I just hope you like it. News: May 12, 2002 The good news is that today's update is bigger than yesterday's. The bad news is that it's still pretty small. Zen's sick as a dog, but luckily, not dead. He still managed to contribute a new feature for us today. It's our second web-comic ish thing, and it involves Cabbage. How can you go wrong? I'm not in much better shape than Zen, having been up for more than a day (I don't think my two hour nap out of 36 counts as sleep), and since I worked 9 hours of hard, old fashioned library work today. Yet, because I love you so, there is a new feature with my tag-line up. Kitty is the best off of all of us. So well off in fact that I wish I were him right now: Fully rested and hanging out with friends. I think I'll settle for sleep. Crossed Reality News: May 11, 2002 We all took a break today after yesterdays mammoth update. There's a new article in the Information section, and an update to the one written on our format. We also have a new feature written by guest author Ravishing Ruiner, on how much she loves Kitty Vertigo. In other news, no one has talked to Zen in almost 24 hours, so for all we know he's dead. Kitty has been left $15 and a house for the weekend, so lord knows what he's going to get into. As for me, I have to work from 8 to 5 tomorrow. Why do I get the feeling I'm the only one not having fun? Crossed Reality News: May 10, 2002 Remember two days ago when I said we had a major update? Well, I was wrong. TODAY we've got an update for you to believe in. No less than four features go up today. I could link to them all individually, but that would be a pain, so why don't you just go check out our features page? We've got a new one from me, a serious bit on video game censorship in the USA. Then, ZenZagg finally joins the active crew by tossing in a feature he calls Signal to Noise, which is worth checking out. I won't spoil it by summarizing it here. Athena Falconess comes back to freelance for our site, and this time, she's done a humour piece. Kitty Vertigo ends his night-long hiatus by writing an article on what he was doing last night instead of writing a feature...namely, cleaning his room. It is more interesting than you can possibly imagine. Finally, I've done a teeny bit of tweaking to our FAQ, adding some new information. Within the next few days, we may have something very interesting you those loyal few readers of you out there. Just wait for it :) Crossed Reality News: May 9, 2002 Okay, as it looks at the moment, we are having a miniscule update tonight. If I decide to post something else closer to dawn, you'll see it pop-up below with a bright red UPDATE next to it. So for today, all you've got is a new feature by me. You can find my attempt at drawing my own web comic here , or on our features page. UPDATE: Yeah, I knew this would happen. I ended up opening a whole new section tonight. Check out our new information page! Crossed Reality News: May 8, 2002 Damn, have we got an update for you tonight. First of all, as I'm sure you've noticed by now, we've changed our format a little. The new blue background and cell lines make the site look much cleaner, in my opinion, instead of the vague white with horizontal dividers we had before. Kitty and I collaborated on the new design, since this all started with a simple table design that I had, that he proceeded to criticize until I got it to something he could stand. I also with much work made it look the same in the good (Netscape) and compromise (Internet Explorer) browsers. All of you out there with Opera, if it looks shitty, I'm sorry. In other update news, ZenZagg's bio has finally been added to the members page, and we have two new features. One, by guest author Athena Falconess, is our first serious piece, about her experiences as a bisexual. The other, another Kitty Vertigo experience...well, just go to the features page and find out for yourself. He's also updated his Pocket Guide with an additional review. Tomorrow we should have a new feature by me, and one from ZenZagg, which will be his first to grace our site. Crossed Reality News: May 7, 2002 Okay, well, still no bio from Zen. But there is some good news! Check out our features page for yet another juicy new article, this one by Kitty Vertigo, making fun of me. Well, basically. I also bought Super Smash Bros. today. Zelda kicks so much ass...I'll make you all die! Sheik to the rescue! Crossed Reality News: May 6, 2002 Well, guess what! Check out our features page for brand new, tender features from myself and Kitty Vertigo! Still no bio for Zen though. Damn his lazy ass. Crossed Reality News: May 5, 2002 Well, there are quite a few changes to report this time. For one, if you've actually been to this site before, you will have noticed the name change at this point. We are no longer Totally Hat!, the webpage of the Hat! clan. Instead, we now call ourselves Jux. This site, accordingly, has had its name changed to The Jux Entente. Those of you out there with large vocabularies can quietly smile at this point, the rest, well, just know it's a good thing. Our reasons for the name change are pretty simple. Since we decided to take this page away from its Ragnarok Online roots, we felt that our clan name no longer fit the purpose of the page. It also has very little to do with us. So, we got together in a chat and tossed ideas around until we came up with an idea that was "us". Jux is us. The most painful part was changing the title on all of our pages. You'd be amazed at how irritating that can be. I've also changed the subtext, and will continue to do so at random, just for fun. In other news, from this point on, all old news will be saved to a text archive, so that at max we will have 5 updates worth of news on this mainpage. At present, I have no plans to post this archive online, I'm merely saving it for my own purposes. However, should the need ever arise, I will form a separate page for it. I mean, you never know when you might want to read Kitty's lovely Haiku. The push for content continues. I've got Zen working on his bio at whip point, and both he and Kitty are being pressured into actually creating something for the site soon. I'm also working on a new feature myself, but needless to say, it will not be the one alluded to at the end of my piece on Web Comics. Unless I get really bored. There may be yet another update today, if I finish my new article, or one of them finishes something. I'm slowly getting into the groove of these updates, although everything is mostly done by hand still. Crossed Reality News: May 5, 2002 The newly redesigned Members page is done. I don't know why you'd want to know more about us, but, well, there you go. Crossed Reality Ranting: May 4, 2002. Yeah, it's been a damned long time since I've updated. I took the 'Ragnarok Online' part out of the subtext of our title for reasons I will explain in this lovely rant. First of all, I've not updated because I've been damned busy. Part of that is the fact that I've had tons of shit going on, the other part is that I'm just lazy about updating webpages, and always will be. We also haven't been playing all that much Ragnarok Online lately. Both SaturnKitty and myself have been fighting with Linux over the last few days, and although our problems are quite different, it has been sufficient to take the focus of our computer attention away from RO. We'll probably go back, but who can say? That's why I took the Ragnarok Online part out of subtext. One day, we will stop playing the game. It happens to everything we do. Yet, we've been a close friend group for quite some time, so I think doing this communal website is a damned good idea. Because of this I hope this page will evolve into something other than it was originally envisioned. Part of that, I think, will come if we stop using our RO names as our web names. ZenZagg is the only one that won't change at all. I'm also going to get in touch with Kitty and see if wants to come up a page-ish thing where he can post his own rants/content within the framework of the site. I'm also going to start doing some rants of my own on here, and archiving them somewhere. I think we'll keep the Hat! clan name, but if that's voted down, well, what can I do? Oh, and we have a new feature, again, written by myself. Why don't you go see if you're interested? Crossed Reality [Lord Zhakrin] Haiku: April 17, 2002 I wear Kitty ears Magic power makes me God Visit the inn with me Grand Duke SaturnKitty News: April 17, 2002 Okay, I'm online right now to add our good friend ZenZagg, the third member of the Hat clan at the moment, to the Member page. Hat had its first true online event last night, when we hosted an "Undead Party" in the Golem Desert, near Morroc. I'm adding a features page as we speak to post the pictures and descriptions of that event, you should check it out, it was quite entertaining. You know, what with the Ragnarok Babes practicing necrophilia, and all. As a final note, the downloads page will be up by late tonight, and it will include an awesome Hat wallpaper! You have to see this thing to believe it. Lord Zhakrin News: April 16, 2002 Well, here is the ultimate prototype of the Hat homepage. It's very early in its development at the moment, so it's butt-ugly and doesn't have much content. I'm sure I will add content as time goes on. Hopefully, by the time all of this is done, all the members of Hat [currently at 3] will have shiny homepages of their own within the hat world, where they can post whatever various content they want. Until then, just check out the members listing page, and if you're really bored, try the downloads page, where a nifty wallpaper image resides. Nifty if you know us. If not, well, you're in for hell. Lord Zhakrin