Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to "Great Moments In American History."

As told by members of online forums:
The Declaration
"dude ur so gay we dun wanna b brtsh ne more."

The Address
"Haha, we 0wnz0red your southern asses!"

The Infamous
"Fuck. They like, bombed pearl harbor and shit. God damnit. I'm going to kill you fucking bastards."

The Resignation
"fuck this shit i didnt do anythin to u ppl im not a crook im leaving now goodbye."

Graeme's Statement
"If you can't take the time to spell "you" online, you're probably going to hell. Believe it or not, acting like an idiot does not make you cool. It just makes you an idiot."

This has been a second day of venting, lovingly presented to you by: